Results 1 to 8 of 8

Thread: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

  1. #1
    Curious Guest
    Joined
    Jul 2017
    Posts
    1
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Hello everyone!

    I hope you are all doing well today. So, I've started going to SCs recently for numerous reasons regarding my mental health and that I'm trying to explore my sexuality in a comfortable and accepted way. I have never been with anyone sexually. I have never been in a relationship. I haven't even gotten my first consensual kiss until just earlier this year; I am 23. This isn't terribly odd, I am learning. I grew up hating myself for being sexual and having sexual desires, a byproduct of how my parents taught me to react to the world, and eventually this complex really began seeping into my relationships and my overall treatment of people. Even when I became aware of it in college, it still made it difficult, near impossible, for me to date people or even navigate my own body. I recently decided that to begin the process of deconstructing this complex, I needed to normalize sex in a controlled environment, and I thought maybe a strip club could be a place where at least I could interact with nudity and normalize it. I have been going to a few for a few weeks now, and it's really been wonderful how more at ease I feel with myself and my body and women in general.

    That said, and here is my question~ I go because I feel like it helps me heal as a person. I could not in good conscience continue if I felt like I was hurting people in this process. There are a lot of stigmas and urban legends towards SCs that exist in my perception of them, about the people who become dancers and why they are dancers. And no ever said nice things. I read thought catalog article earlier today about how loathsome clients are. What I want to know:

    Is there a way I can continue attending and be a positive person in that environment? I know a job is a job and I avoid white knight/savior complexes. I'm not interested in saving anyone, I feel that's super condescending. What I want to know is do you have advice on how I can let the women (or men, I'm making some plans because I want to explore my sexuality wholly) feel safe, comfortable, appreciated and, if possible, good~ not in the erotic way, but if I can do that too without being disgusting, then sure. But I don't want to just stop going, either. But I will if I must.

    I just want to have a positive energy in an industry I get the feeling can be a bit overwhelming.

    If I've offended anyone with this, please let me know. I'm not trying to, I promise.

  2. #2
    Veteran Member Nadia_'s Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2014
    Location
    NYC/PHILLY/NJ
    Posts
    379
    Thanks
    929
    Thanked 578 Times in 237 Posts
    My Mood
    Fine

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Awe dude listen just live by the golden rule, treat another as you'd like to be treated.
    Strippers are people just like you , some of us hate some of the clients....some of my clients have taught me about life and I've learned so many cool and interesting things from them I have special places in my heart for them...they became my dear friends who don't mind helping with my bills...it's an organic relationship with mutual understanding that is satisfying on both sides... a positive exchange


    Some stink like ass some smell so good I never want to get off their lap lol is what I'm saying but you could say that for ANY customer service job.... take the good with the bad ... it's really not as serious and negative as that article suggested how 15 random strippers felt lol smh....


    Try to be genuine and up front with every person you are ready to explore yourself with is key
    That will help you find your tribe if you will...




  3. The Following User Says Thank You to Nadia_ For This Useful Post:


  4. #3
    God/dess Sam38g's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    3,696
    Thanks
    3,807
    Thanked 20,070 Times in 3,271 Posts

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    I think you need professional help of a sex therapist to guide you through all of this process.

    There are also nudist camps, nude beaches so that you can see normal people from all walks of life being naked with no shame.

  5. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to Sam38g For This Useful Post:


  6. #4
    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    18,541
    Thanks
    34,936
    Thanked 13,916 Times in 7,307 Posts
    My Mood
    Doh

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Yea, we have a nudist colony not too far, Roselawn, IN, they just finished up Nudes-a-Poppin' it's a weekend of Mr/Ms Nude various contests, porn star guests, etc.
    You can bring your camera too.

  7. #5
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    3,491
    Thanks
    1,652
    Thanked 2,639 Times in 1,447 Posts

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Quote Originally Posted by whirlerz View Post
    Yea, we have a nudist colony not too far, Roselawn, IN, they just finished up Nudes-a-Poppin' it's a weekend of Mr/Ms Nude various contests, porn star guests, etc.
    You can bring your camera too.
    Did you go? Did you win?
    Last edited by slowpoke; 07-17-2017 at 08:46 AM.

  8. The Following User Says Thank You to slowpoke For This Useful Post:


  9. #6
    God/dess
    Joined
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    3,491
    Thanks
    1,652
    Thanked 2,639 Times in 1,447 Posts

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Do you have medical insurance that would cover some treatment?

    This sounds like trying to take out your own appendix, or fill your own teeth.

  10. #7
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    6,279
    Thanks
    22,382
    Thanked 13,214 Times in 4,853 Posts
    My Mood
    Blah

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    Why not hire a sex surrogate. It's a legitimate form of sex therapy and the surrogates are certified. You don't have to have sex if you don't want but the sex surrogates can do what therapists aren't able to such as physical touch (like hugging, embracing, etc), and explore your sexuality on a deeper level.

    The only thing about a strip club is its fantasy and if you translate how you behave in a strip club to how you behave in real life you will find it very different.

  11. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to miss.a.p1600 For This Useful Post:


  12. #8
    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    18,541
    Thanks
    34,936
    Thanked 13,916 Times in 7,307 Posts
    My Mood
    Doh

    Default Re: A Question to dancers regarding Comfort

    I think this's the best idea yet, which Sam also suggested

  13. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to whirlerz For This Useful Post:


Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 10
    Last Post: 10-11-2012, 05:40 PM
  2. I need comfort
    By Marleysade in forum Life Support
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 07-05-2011, 07:56 AM
  3. Just a question about personal comfort levels in lapdancing
    By mollyzmoon in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 50
    Last Post: 10-30-2009, 11:07 AM
  4. Why do dancers violate my comfort zone?
    By delasangre in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 02-22-2007, 12:40 AM
  5. Your comfort...
    By sallylou in forum Dancer's Discussion
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 05-16-2003, 12:56 PM

Tags for this Thread

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •