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Thread: Keeping my job secret - struggles

  1. #26
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    ^^hahaha this is true, but I was once clocked as a stripper by a nail lady in MTL when I was dancing in Toronto and here on vacation. I was at a salon in the club district with platinum extensions down to my ass. There are 60 clubs within the city limits. It's not so unusual here because there's a culture of strip clubs. I never copped to it and she never charged me different - I just mean in some cities and with some types of people (cirque du soleil performers, rappers, nail techs in mtl) will be like whatever. Sometimes just knowing that there are other people out there who find our work unremarkable like we do can be reassuring.

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    Curious Guest silviastardust's Avatar
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    Not all parent shun & not all girls call you a slut.

    It is new & exciting, of course you want to share it with everyone. You are happy, it is natural...
    I love the varrying perspectives. I really appreciate your attitude towards fake people. I want that REAL love. REAL friendship. ...and REAL money. Ahahahaha
    .*.+* Silvia Stardust *+.*.

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  4. #28
    God/dess Sam38g's Avatar
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    Quote Originally Posted by sexkitten_666 View Post
    I told my two "best friends" I was a cam girl and found out one wasn't a best friend at all m found out that even my land Lord was calling me a whore and telling random people I never met what I do. When men find these things out, it jeopardizes you safety. I would seriously keep it as hush as possible. Telling anyone at all was my biggest mistake.
    Your landlord calling you names puts them in jeopardy of discrimination which illegal. More of us who hold those who discriminate against us in courtrooms more we get rid of the stigma. It won't be easy, the law won't always be on your side. But it might & you can win judgments for it. There are gov agencies you can report it too. There is the UCLA & Southern Poverty law center.

    These are Civil Rights infractions when it comes to Landlords & other jobs.

    As for family or friends who try to shame you, flip the script on them. Sometimes family members or friends don't realize how hurtful they really are being. Those who do, then what do you have to lose by reflecting back to them how they are treating you.

    They have zero fears in being honest with you & how they feel. So why not have zero fears in being honest about how they are being cruel. You deserve better.

    What have we learned with all these scandals in the news about sexual harassment & rape in every other industry? We've learned that women have the decks stacked against them. No matter how hard you work, education levels or connections that there is a male boss or co-worker who wants to fuck you & fuck you over. Sex industry is the only industry were it is all a bit more honest about how it all works & you have the biggest potential to earn more money than an office job at this stage in your career.

    The career track to good positions, pay, financial security have been cut off to females by 90% in the world due to men. There are no good men when 90% of the world wealth is held by men. There are no good men with 90% of all violent crimes are committed by men. Sex industry is the only industry were we can exploit men due to their dicks aka flipping the script on them.

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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    I'd be careful telling anyone anything. Certain people will rob you for money, and even family members and friends are not exempt from this. Any guy friends will suddenly turn against you and expect freebies from you and might blackmail you into sex.

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  8. #30
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    People can be exhausting. When people are trying to figure out what to get from you or have intentions to hurt you. That's one reason I don't like bothering with people so much or grown too tired of caring so much.
    Last edited by yaya_cash; 12-09-2017 at 03:49 AM.

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  10. #31
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    The bit about any males friends becoming dangerous if they find out is so very true. I had an instance that may constitute rape under CA law that I do not think would have happened had the guy not known what I do for a living. When I threatened to say something about it, he threatened libel. Things like that are hard to prove, so the piece of garbage gets to walk around free and do as he pleases to the next.

    If not rape, then men will try to get 'freebies' from you. You'll experience player mentality in every direction you turn.

    One of my roommates knows what I do because he guessed when I had recently moved in and since I'm not a good liar, I didn't deny it, so that 'cat' is out of the bag. However, he is a cheap Indian with a good job who thinks that most strippers are just single moms trying to feed their kids (his words). So I don't think I'll be getting robbed of money by him, 'cause clearly, there isn't enough respect or knowledge of the line of work to think it's possible to make good money doing it. I'm definitely afraid of telling anyone else in my neighborhood, as it's pretty sketch. I'd be terrified of neighbors finding out because the landlord would surely have reason to raise my rent substantially at the end of the sublease if I wanted to renew it, all the working class people who admittedly work a lot harder for their money than I do and have a lot more free time would be envious, resentful and potentially, plot to steal from me. So now, I'm a bit more careful, given my neighborhood.

    In LA, everyone I've ever encountered thought I was really desperate for choosing this line of work. They didn't allow me the opportunity to get close enough to them to get robbed.

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  12. #32
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    You know male strippers dont deal with this kinda crazy shaming.
    It is still mostly new career, more of a novelty to cause shame, I would not do it because people are sex negative by default.

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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    Amen. I’m so grateful to have a safe space here at least. I want to get a day job and I’m just so worried about the girls at work outing me and then the people at my day job finding out. I realize I’m being paranoid, but it’s like oh my gosh. If a married nurse came in the club, I would look like a crazy person if I told his boss. No one would want to hear it! But if I’m a nurse and I get caught, then I can lose my license. That’s such a double standard.

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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    Your landlord calling you names puts them in jeopardy of discrimination which illegal. More of us who hold those who discriminate against us in courtrooms more we get rid of the stigma. It won't be easy, the law won't always be on your side. But it might & you can win judgments for it. There are gov agencies you can report it too. There is the UCLA & Southern Poverty law center.

    These are Civil Rights infractions when it comes to Landlords & other jobs.

    As for family or friends who try to shame you, flip the script on them. Sometimes family members or friends don't realize how hurtful they really are being. Those who do, then what do you have to lose by reflecting back to them how they are treating you.

    They have zero fears in being honest with you & how they feel. So why not have zero fears in being honest about how they are being cruel. You deserve better.

    What have we learned with all these scandals in the news about sexual harassment & rape in every other industry? We've learned that women have the decks stacked against them. No matter how hard you work, education levels or connections that there is a male boss or co-worker who wants to fuck you & fuck you over. Sex industry is the only industry were it is all a bit more honest about how it all works & you have the biggest potential to earn more money than an office job at this stage in your career.

    The career track to good positions, pay, financial security have been cut off to females by 90% in the world due to men. There are no good men when 90% of the world wealth is held by men. There are no good men with 90% of all violent crimes are committed by men. Sex industry is the only industry were we can exploit men due to their dicks aka flipping the script on them.
    I love you...lol that’s awesome ! I just had to double dip and give you a shout out.

  16. #35
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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    True scary story about privacy that belongs in this thread- on one of my last shifts a customer kept hounding me to meet outside of the club (I stupidly mentioned the name of the city I was staying in...the customer claimed to be a car salesman and I mentioned I was car shopping.) The owner heard this guy trying to solicit me & TOLD him to stop asking me to meet outside the club.

    The guy kept talking about it loudly so I asked the owner to warn him again. The guy denied asking anything at all.... even though it was the same person warning him to NOT run around bragging loudly that a dancer was going to see him.

    So ugh. That kind of scenario defines "he said/she said".
    "They're a bit strange in Los Angeles" Duckie, "NCIS"I've walked in L.A.. It was to my car, so I could drive in L.A..













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    Default Re: Keeping my job secret - struggles

    Quote Originally Posted by SnuffleUffleGrass View Post
    True scary story about privacy that belongs in this thread- on one of my last shifts a customer kept hounding me to meet outside of the club (I stupidly mentioned the name of the city I was staying in...the customer claimed to be a car salesman and I mentioned I was car shopping.) The owner heard this guy trying to solicit me & TOLD him to stop asking me to meet outside the club.

    The guy kept talking about it loudly so I asked the owner to warn him again. The guy denied asking anything at all.... even though it was the same person warning him to NOT run around bragging loudly that a dancer was going to see him.

    So ugh. That kind of scenario defines "he said/she said".

    You can’t trust customers to keep quiet. Even if it’s something innocent like buying a car.

    I don’t judge girls for there OTC activity, but seriously how do you maintain your emotional/psychological health when you start mixing personal life and work life? I couldn’t do it! It’s too stressful! Some people might be able to set boundaries and it doesn’t effect too badly.

    I’ve tried to make friends at work and it always back fires. The girls flake out on lunch dates. I once gave a guy a second line and he just acted so crazy! So now I keep my personal/ work life completely separate. Which is challenging because I care about be authentic, but there’s no effective way to be authentic and stay safe. We just havent made that much progress with sex positivity.

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