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Thread: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

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    Duh Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Have any dancers here ever had a customer start crying during a lap dance? If so, I'd love to hear some stories and also how you felt about it.

    Last month I went to a club and bought some dances from one of my favorites and got totally lost in the fantasy. She kissed me gently on the forehead, it was a very tender moment and before knew it I was crying. It lasted no more than a minute (One verse and chorus of Love Bites by Def Leppard. Very appropriate song to cry to during a lap dance, btw. Also, somewhat accurate description of how my marriage ended). When I stopped crying I apologized. She seemed to be thrown off a bit, but she handled it well. She said that had never happened before, which surprised me.

    I want to go see her again, but I feel embarrassed. I imagine it's not a big deal for her, but it is for me. Would it be appropriate to bring it up with her, maybe over a drink before getting dances?

    To be clear, this something I want to do for myself--not for her--so I can hopefully stop having that pang of embarrassment every time it pops into my head. What I would be doing for her is giving her money. ie: compensate her for her time either by spending a lot on dances, or tipping generously otherwise.

    Also, what's up with kissing customers? I guess it's just part of the hustle, it always confuses me though. I think I just answered my own question.

    Thanks.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I don't even know what to say to this...
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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Well, never seen any tears, but once my stage name (when I introduced myself) triggered a customer.. come to think of it, he got very upset..
    It was his ex's name, obviously he got very triggered by it.
    I just passed by him then so he could move on about it.

    Don't feel embarrassed, just go back n have some fun.
    We all have feelings, (well most of us).
    I was recently talking to a random guy in a store, he kinda teared up about his friend who died in combat, I think he might have survivor's guilt.
    Good luck

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I've definitely had a guy cry during a vip. It's really nbd, some guys break down cause they lack people in their lives to share really private/personal/emotional things with and obviously the club can be an intimate environment sometimes.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I suppose if you are respectful about it and the dancer is ok with it.
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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I had a regular whose mother recently died and he was talking about it with me. Mind you, I didn't bring it up and kept trying to steer the conversation away from the subject but he persisted, so I figured it was something he needed to vent about. He started to cry for about a minute and I consoled him. He apologized and I told him not to worry, he was going through a lot. If you want to bring it up again to her, make a short joke about it, leave it at that, and then go for dances. It's really not a big deal. You can't imagine the weird scenarios we see on a daily basis.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Thanks everyone. It just occurred to me after writing this post that dancers must deal with way worse things than a few spare tears. I like the idea of bring it up with a joke and leaving it at that.

    The strange thing is I wasn't even sad. I just got so lost in the moment that the kiss startled me, and I got disoriented and couldn't tell fantasy from reality for a split second.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Same. Have had a customer cry. It's absolutely nothing more than unusual not bad or wrong.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by AloneNotLonely View Post
    Thanks everyone. It just occurred to me after writing this post that dancers must deal with way worse things than a few spare tears. I like the idea of bring it up with a joke and leaving it at that.

    The strange thing is I wasn't even sad. I just got so lost in the moment that the kiss startled me, and I got disoriented and couldn't tell fantasy from reality for a split second.
    I'd rather have a customer cry in my arms than some handsy pervert who whips his dick out.

    Just go back, thank her for her understanding, and move on from it.

    I've had customers cry. I just give them a hug and let them let it out.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by LoveyDovey View Post
    I'd rather have a customer cry in my arms than some handsy pervert who whips his dick out.

    Just go back, thank her for her understanding, and move on from it.

    I've had customers cry. I just give them a hug and let them let it out.
    Hm, that sounds nice... you're making me want to go back and have a good cry again! Seriously, though, I'm only half joking.


    Thank you. You are all wonderful here.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    It’s really nothing to get worked up about. Dancers understand that men come to strip clubs when they are lonely, sad, need to get their mind off things, etc. and if it happened to me I would just assure the customer that he isn’t a robot and emotions are natural.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I've had two criers that I can recall. One recently who's wife and mother of his children died of cancer and one who's dog had just passed. Both very normal reasons to cry. I mean, I've never had anyone cry during a lapdance, this was always during rooms that went on for an hour+.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    ive had a few guys cry and it was a little awkward because cause i always feel awkward when anyone cries.. even if it's a good friend or someone i'm dating. i'm just bad at consoling people but i never thought any less of a customer for crying. it's not that big of a deal. and neither is kissing (without tongue) on the neck or forehead. sounds like it was probs just another day at the office for her lol

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by arielbriel View Post
    I've had two criers that I can recall. One recently who's wife and mother of his children died of cancer and one who's dog had just passed. Both very normal reasons to cry. I mean, I've never had anyone cry during a lapdance, this was always during rooms that went on for an hour+.
    similar situation. we we're in the lap dance area for at least 45 minutes. it's not quite a room though, more like a couch surrounded by four shades.


    i 'lost' my (now) ex-wife to mental illness last year. she's still around, but she's not really there as i knew her. sad, but life goes on.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    short post from me on mobile..

    Yes, this has happened to me many times. Personally, i enjoy it. I'm very comfortable with emotional sessions with clients, and I'm good at providing a safe space for that kind of intensity and emotional intimacy.

    However, every dancer is different. I've worked with many younger dancers or emotionally immature / unstable / etc women who would definitely not be comfortable with that level of intensity.

    I'd say dancers who make lots of eye contact tend to be more open to connected, intimate sessions. As long as you aren't trying to make it into more than a beautiful moment of connection, it shouldn't be an issue. So just be sure to pay her for her time, tell her you enjoyed it, and don't ask her out afterwards or anything.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Couple of hundreds & a thank you for letting me emotionally vent in a way I didn't expect myself to do the last time I was here.

    Seek out some groups that help each other move on from losing a loved one. Where it is appropriate & you can use the support & emotionally work it out towards a healthier you.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    I'd say dancers who make lots of eye contact tend to be more open to connected, intimate sessions. As long as you aren't trying to make it into more than a beautiful moment of connection, it shouldn't be an issue. So just be sure to pay her for her time, tell her you enjoyed it, and don't ask her out afterwards or anything.
    Yeah, no worries there. The whole reason I go to strip clubs is to get these beautiful, but fleeting, moments of connection without having to deal with the weight of someone else's emotional needs. That and the oxytocin release from skin to skin contact. It works. My stress level goes down, physical pain goes away, I sleep better, etc. Interesting that you mention eye contact. Long periods of uninterrupted eye gazing is part of her routine. Took me a while to get used to, but it's very powerful.

    Oh, she gets paid. I always give her more money than she asked for and she tends to give me more dances than the quoted rate--ostensibly because she's lonely and in need of physical contact herself. It's a good hustle and I know that very likely it's not true, but I appreciate it and it keeps me coming back for more.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Yes. This happened to me once when I was a newbie at dancing. It caught me so off gaurd. Lol. I felt terrible. The guy admitted to me that his mother died before taking me to vip and cried right there as soon as it started. I wasn't prepared for that. I didn't know how to ask for a tip. It was awkward and weird, but I understand.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by charlie61 View Post
    I'd say dancers who make lots of eye contact tend to be more open to connected, intimate sessions. As long as you aren't trying to make it into more than a beautiful moment of connection, it shouldn't be an issue. So just be sure to pay her for her time, tell her you enjoyed it, and don't ask her out afterwards or anything.
    i 1000% agree with this! i've had some issues in the past though because a lot of guys seem to get confused and interpret it as much more than what it is. i love what i do and love making connections and getting real and deep and intimate with people but sometimes i think i'm too good at it haha. after our time is up i just go on with my shift but when these kinds of things happen, guys can't seem to understand that i do this all the time because it is something they rarely experience. doesn't mean i don't like them or whatever but i'm just doing my job

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by Girl Anachronism View Post
    i 1000% agree with this! i've had some issues in the past though because a lot of guys seem to get confused and interpret it as much more than what it is. i love what i do and love making connections and getting real and deep and intimate with people but sometimes i think i'm too good at it haha. after our time is up i just go on with my shift but when these kinds of things happen, guys can't seem to understand that i do this all the time because it is something they rarely experience. doesn't mean i don't like them or whatever but i'm just doing my job
    it is confusing! if it wasn't it wouldn't be nearly as fun. and a stripper who on top of that makes an effort to get to know me a little bit, and genuinely show vulnerability herself? guaranteed money on the spot and future dividends. i went with friends to a club last week that was having a party, i tipped at the stage but never sat down, did not approach any dancers. wasn't gonna get any dances. then one of them overheard me talking to the DJ, something I said caught her interest so she interjected and and we had a quick conversation. she shared a couple of personal things about herself, and as the night progressed and i consumed more alcohol it built up in my head into this intrigue that i could not shake (it didn't hurt that she kept coming up to me and unbuttoning my shirt, either). after about my 5th drink i lost all willpower and cashed out for some dances and one of the best conversations i've had with a dancer.

    that one turned into a 3-4 day emotional hangover though. hurt a little bit. in a good way.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Well, at least she will remember you better than any other customer. That could be a plus or a minus. I predict one of three possibilities:

    (A) If she is a nice person, she will probably be very cool. She might be extra sweet and tender with you, maybe out of some maternal instincts or nurse-like instincts.

    (B) If she is not so nice, she will probably assume you are very lonely and sad dude, and try to hustle you out of every last dollar in your wallet or accessible by ATM.

    (C) Another possibility is that she may try to avoid you if you made her feel awkward and she is not comfortable with emotional outbreaks.
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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    I've cried to a customer before lmfao
    So it happens lol

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Don't worry or feel bad about it. I have had men cry on me before because for whatever reason people like to open up to me. I don't look down on a man for crying. I realize that we all have feelings and can get sad, feel lonely, depressed or whatever emotion triggered you to cry. When you see her again, don't worry about it. It happens.

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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by Meowxo View Post
    I've cried to a customer before lmfao
    So it happens lol
    Why?
    What did he do about it?
    What should a customer do if this happens?
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    Default Re: Crying in a strippers arms during a lap dance

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    Why?
    What did he do about it?
    What should a customer do if this happens?
    Give her more money.

    I did have this happen once. I could tell she was having a shitty day/week/month and did not want to be crying at work to top it all off (messing up her make-up, etc) so I distracted her with some bad jokes and we had a great time. I did give her all the cash I had and bought her some stuff with my credit card. She spent a generous amount of time with me and we had a great conversation. Everybody wins.

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