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Thread: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Sam38g View Post
    Men try to spend as little money as possible until THAT one has them by the short & curlies and and just can't resist her. Which has zero to do with whether or not she is in the industry.

    Men do NOT invest into women UNLESS they are getting sex out of it. They don't do it to see her life improvement over all. Men are NOT that charitable.

    Rich men have pre-nups to KEEP their assets NOT share them. When they get divorced they hide assets & expensive lawyers to get out of any kind of financial responsibility.
    You seem to think marrying a rich guy is the answer, when at a certain point they will just upgrade you for a younger newer model. Very few women can marry for money & upgrade in each marriage.

    Financial wealth & long term investments start with you & you investing into stock, bonds, funds and such each week & grow that nest egg all own your own by hustling men for money any way you can now.

    "Diamonds are a girl's best friend" but gold is a better investment long term.

    $400,000 & a Mercedes may sound like a lot of money but it isn't. Now when a fancy Mercedes can cost $75,000 or more like half that $400,000 nest egg. If you married & got half then that is only $200,000 after how many years of marriage. Let's say 10, which equals to $20,000 a year.

    Now if you took $250 a week of money you made & invested it. How much would that make with interest & earning in a growth money market fund? Without having to wash some guys dirty underwear.
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    Every woman in this thread? I'm under the impression that the majority of the women in this thread have expressed disapproval at the type of relationship dynamic you keep advocating for. And no I do not consider my customers paying for me for my services at my JOB as me gold-digging. Me making money via my job is me providing for myself, having a boyfriend 'improving my quality of life' and 'economic standing' would not be me providing for myself.
    I'm not advocating for anything. If I were, I'd say you should do this and here is why. Everyone has their own preferences.

    Whether you provide a service, provide time/companionship, etc.......you are getting your money from men to do as you please with said money. They give you money which you use to improve your life via paying bills/saving/etc. The same can be said for wives who stay at home or girlfriends whose bf's spend on them or sugarbabies whose sugardaddies give them allowance.

    My point is money is not falling from the sky - everyone on this thread derives income from other people. The 4 hours you clock in giving lap dances is no different from the 4 hours a sugar baby spends having dinner with her sd, same 4 hours a wife spends cooking/cleaning for her family, same 4 hours a gf spends on a date with her rich bf, same 4 hours an escort spends with her client.

    Your hustle is no different. It's all the same.
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 01-12-2018 at 12:29 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    I don't know what rants you're talking about, I'm only talking about what I'm reading in this thread. Yes that example of the book is a very inexpensive yet helpful gift, but let's be clear in this thread you are not talking about little inexpensive, thoughtful gifts. You're talking about some pretty pricey stuff like this:





    .....



    Well yes...but that's not what you were talking about. You specifically said that men buy women gifts to show them what kind of generosity they could expect to receive upon marriage, I argued that that's probably not why most men buy women gifts and gave you a different example, and now you're arguing against my example by giving even me more examples that go against what you initially said. ? Like someone else said it's kind of hard to discuss this with you because you keep changing the parameters and switching back on your own words. I mean ultimately it doesn't really matter because we have very different ideas about relationships so it's not like either of us is going to learn anything from the other. Btw are you a Capricorn? You seem very materialistic and money-hungry like me and those are big Capricorn traits. I especially wouldn't be surprised if your rising sign is Capricorn.
    Yes. I was referring in that post to pricier items but I'd never discount gifts given to me that are helpful yet inexpensive.

    No it's hard to discuss because you hear what you want to hear and It is not easy to convey/clarify via chat.

    I'd agree we just simply have differing perspectives on certain topics. And thats okay.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I'm not advocating for anything. If I were, I'd say you should do this and here is why. Everyone has their own preferences.
    I'm not saying you're advocating it to us, but if women are telling you that they don't think the kind of relationship dynamic you're describing is very healthy or practical and then you argue for why it is, I would say that you are advocating for it. I feel like that was pretty obvious.

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Whether you provide a service, provide time/companionship, etc.......you are getting your money from men to do as you please with said money. They give you money which you use to improve your life via paying bills/saving/etc. The same can be said for wives who stay at home or girlfriends whose bf's spend on them or sugarbabies whose sugardaddies give them allowance.

    My point is money is not falling from the sky - everyone on this thread derives income from other people.

    Your hustle is no different. It's all the same.
    I have to disagree. Making money via a job is not the same as being financially dependent on a person. Everyone in this thread (presumably)IS deriving income from other people----however financial support received from a boyfriend is not income. I understand what you're saying that women who use men for money is more business-oriented than it is relationship-oriented, but that's not true in reverse; people who make money via their businesses and jobs are not relationship-oriented.

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    You are also jumping to conclusions based on your bias regarding whatever rants or whatever I posted in the past. For example, I had a dude I went out with on 1 date buy me a book about law of attraction - that is an example of a guy buying something that can help to improve goals/economic standing/etc. It doesn't always have to be extravagant but it can be. I also mentioned once that I had a very short-term goal of getting a bike. Dude I've known for all of 30 min hands me cash and was like here go get that bike you want. Both instances I was not in long-term relationship and dudes gave me something that improved the quality of my life. I also like to believe I gave them something as well (not necessarily sex/anything sexual) but just being attentive to them
    Did you re-edit that to include those examples to prove I'm jumping to conclusions based on your former posts? I literally have NO idea what you are talking about and I've never read the posts where you told those stories. If you think I'm attacking you I promise you I'm not.

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Also you are speaking of people who are wanting to improve in life in what seems to be derogatory way. How are you as a female who hasn't done any research on what men REALLy want to say that they would not be attracted to women of lower economic status than themselves? I actually created a thread a while back (I'll see if I can find link) but you know what? Men really don't place as much value on women's economic status/income as much as they do the woman's character. Now maybe they were lying or maybe there was some reason for them to give this response. idk
    Why do you assume that I haven't done any research on said topic? 1.) it's an incorrect assumption, and 2.) I'm curious to know what research you have done? Aside from making a post on Stripperweb? I'm also willing to bet that I have a lot more personal experience with the subjects at hand as well, I notice that you tend to primarily argue from theory rather than experience. Also in regards to that thread; I didn't read much of it but I don't doubt your summarization, IME financial equality is not a major dating/relationship prerequisite for men. That being said though, just because a man is okay with a woman earning less income than him doesn't = him wanting to then financially support her. Those are 2 different things.
    Last edited by Genoveve; 01-12-2018 at 12:59 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    I'm not saying you're advocating it to us, but if women are telling you that they don't think the kind of relationship dynamic you're describing is very healthy or practical and then you argue for why it is, I would say that you are advocating for it. I feel like that was pretty obvious.
    IDK. I suppose I have seen successful examples with my own eyes - but perhaps what I've seen or experienced is rare. And perhaps my perspective is more a minority - at least among the people in this thread.

    Also the thread has become very long now so it is possible people are skimming over and misunderstanding.

    But different strokes for different folks I suppose.

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    I have to disagree. Making money via a job is not the same as being financially independent on a person. Everyone in this thread (presumably)IS deriving income from other people----however financial support received from a boyfriend is not income. I understand what you're saying that women who use men for money is more business-oriented than it is relationship-oriented, but that's not true in reverse; people who make money via their businesses and jobs are not relationship-oriented.
    Hmm. well IDK. I'm not seeing it as using men/a business but maybe there is some grey area.

    I would think, for example a woman has a rich bf and he gifts her 6k for say some educational trip abroad. She would take 1k to invest, and spend the rest on the trip. She would still claim the 6k on tax returns as gifts/other income.

    And when you say business not relationship oriented you mean romantic/emotional?

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    Did you re-edit that to include those examples to prove I'm jumping to conclusions based on your former posts? I literally have NO idea what you are talking about and I've never read the posts where you told those stories. If you think I'm attacking you I promise you I'm not.
    Some of my posts I edit to make better sense (if possible) or tone down some of the harshness or whatever, not to prove anything regarding jumping to conclusions. You mentioned something about wasting pussy lol - I believe I may have posted that in the past. However some of the shit I say on here is impulsive ranting and not all the way serious.

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    Why do you assume that I haven't done any research on said topic? 1.) it's an incorrect assumption, and 2.) I'm curious to know what research you have done? Aside from making a post on Stripperweb? I'm also willing to bet that I have a lot more personal experience with the subjects at hand as well, I notice that you tend to primarily argue from theory rather than experience. Also in regards to that thread; I didn't read much of it but I don't doubt your summarization, IME financial equality is not a major dating/relationship prerequisite for men. That being said though, just because a man is okay with a woman earning less income than him doesn't = him wanting to then financially support her. Those are 2 different things.
    Oh ok. I figured you'd mention if you had.

    Making a post on stripper webs asking for peoples thoughts/idea/perspectives maybe even a poll is a form of informal researching but if I had the time I could perform more formal research with a larger sample size, publish findings, etc.

    And I did mention in the first page that when I asked the question is was partially based on theory.
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 01-12-2018 at 01:19 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I'm not advocating for anything. If I were, I'd say you should do this and here is why. Everyone has their own preferences.

    Whether you provide a service, provide time/companionship, etc.......you are getting your money from men to do as you please with said money. They give you money which you use to improve your life via paying bills/saving/etc. The same can be said for wives who stay at home or girlfriends whose bf's spend on them or sugarbabies whose sugardaddies give them allowance.

    My point is money is not falling from the sky - everyone on this thread derives income from other people. The 4 hours you clock in giving lap dances is no different from the 4 hours a sugar baby spends having dinner with her sd, same 4 hours a wife spends cooking/cleaning for her family, same 4 hours a gf spends on a date with her rich bf, same 4 hours an escort spends with her client.

    Your hustle is no different. It's all the same.
    There is a difference. Family members don't consider their situations as a hustle. When you have a family and care for someone, it's not considered a business transaction. It is not the same thing. Escorts, Sugar Babies, Dancers, Camgirls, PSO's, Pornstars (did I leave anyone out?) That's entertainment. These are our jobs. When you put that aside or "turn it off" is when you go home and focus on your family and loved ones. The only thing I clock in for is the entertainment. When I'm taking care of my family I'm off the clock and living my life.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    IDK. I suppose I have seen successful examples with my own eyes - but perhaps what I've seen or experienced is rare. And perhaps my perspective is more a minority - at least among the people in this thread.
    I wasn't asking you why you are desirous of the kind of relationship you are.

    And for the record, I said it before and I'll say it again; I don't think there is anything wrong with that kind of relationship. In fact I have always wondered why gold-digging women get demonized because in those kinds of relationships the men usually know exactly what's going on. Both parties are complicit and both parties are getting what they want, I don't see the big deal.
    Last edited by Genoveve; 01-12-2018 at 01:10 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I would think, for example a woman has a rich bf and he gifts her 6k for say some educational trip abroad. She would take 1k to invest, and spend the rest on the trip. She would still claim the 6k on tax returns as gifts/other income.
    No matter what she claims it as to the IRS, it was still given to her as a gift from a bf and was not income from an employer.

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    And when you say business not relationship oriented you mean romantic/emotional?
    Yes. I'm saying that just because some people use relationships to make money doesn't mean that people who make money via their employment are using relationships to do it; I don't have relationships with my cam customers off of whom I make money, a waiter doesn't have relationships with the customers he or she serves and makes money off of, a chef doesn't have relationships with the customers he cooks for and makes money off of....etc. It doesn't really make sense but that's the whole point.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by PhatGirlDynomite!!! View Post
    There is a difference. Family members don't consider their situations as a hustle. When you have a family and care for someone, it's not considered a business transaction. It is not the same thing. Escorts, Sugar Babies, Dancers, Camgirls, PSO's, Pornstars (did I leave anyone out?) That's entertainment. These are our jobs. When you put that aside or "turn it off" is when you go home and focus on your family and loved ones. The only thing I clock in for is the entertainment. When I'm taking care of my family I'm off the clock and living my life.
    I don't mean like youre hustling your family. I mean like for example, a housewife gets ready to divorce - what was her time/effort worth and how much alimony is she owed?

    Well if/when these divorces occur and mf's busting out calculators, dividing up property and figuring alimony ---- marriage can be a business transaction from a numbers point of view

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    No matter what she claims it as to the IRS, it was still given to her as a gift from a bf and was not income from an employer.
    Well, I was under the impression many adult industry careers are self-employed/independent contractor so theirs don't come from employer either

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    I wasn't asking you why you are desirous of the kind of relationship you are.

    And for the record, I said it before and I'll say it again; I don't think there is anything wrong with that kind of relationship. In fact I have always wondered why gold-digging women get demonized because in those kinds of relationships the men usually know exactly what's going on. Both parties are complicit and both parties are getting what they want, I don't see the big deal.
    IDK. I guess my idea what constitutes men spending money on civilian women is different from straight up gold-digging.

    I think it is demonized because it is viewed as the woman not giving two fucks about the dude whilst getting money with no effort at all on her part.

    This is not what I'm thinking about when I posted. Maybe That is why when I kept posting it was making it seem like 'advocating' but really it seems more like the posters here view dating/marrying into wealth same as gold-digging regardless of emotional connection/true intention/etc

    I was thinking more along the lines of a long-term relationship leading to marriage with a dude successful in career and wise in managing finances and generous with his lady. There is mutual respect and positive emotional connection. If a family or kids is in the picture then the dude is willing to do more of the income producing activities so the finances will be available to help the kids live a 'good' life. (this is based on more 'traditional' roles)

    That is all.
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 01-12-2018 at 01:48 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Well if/when these divorces occur and mf's busting out calculators, dividing up property and figuring alimony ---- marriage can be a business transaction from a numbers point of view
    Okay girly. Goodnight

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    ^^That's an entirely different situation though. You were talking about men giving money to their girlfriends just because they want to, which is what PGD was talking about.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Well, I was under the impression many adult industry careers are self-employed/independent contractor, vanilla careers most of them are via employer
    So because in my job I'm an independent contractor, that means the money that I make isn't income? Interesting. Wonder what the IRS would say about that one.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    And honestly, it doesn't matter. Whether or not someone's income is coming from an employer or whether they're an independent contractor, it still doesn't mean that money a woman receives from a bf is income.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I was thinking more along the lines of a long-term relationship leading to marriage with a dude successful in career and wise in managing finances and generous with his lady. There is mutual respect and positive emotional connection. If a family or kids is in the picture then the dude is willing to do more of the income producing activities so the finances will be available to help the kids live a 'good' life. (this is based on more 'traditional' roles)
    Well the thing to me is that the stuff you keep wanting a guy to do or thinking a guy should do in a relationship---like being so generous to where he's heavily investing financially into his partner---is typically stuff that I think a guy is going to be more likely to do once he knows a woman is the one he wants to build a life with. It's not something I can see them doing for every chick they date, so trying to figure out how soon into a relationship is soon enough for a guy to start throwing money at a woman like she's his wife just doesn't really make much sense to me. I feel like wanting a happy marriage with a man who can and wants to be the sole provider and wanting a man who is willing to financially support you, and quickly, while you're dating are 2 completely different things. On one hand you want a generous man and a happy relationship, and on the other hand your like 'How soon into dating will a guy start financially supporting me?' Like is it all about the money or isn't it?
    Last edited by Genoveve; 01-12-2018 at 02:33 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    And honestly, it doesn't matter. Whether or not someone's income is coming from an employer or whether they're an independent contractor, it still doesn't mean that money a woman receives from a bf is income.
    I think that depends. I believe it depends on what is done with the money gifted. But I wonder if that Zofia woman knows.

    Do you think the physical effort with which a woman derived her income makes one more valid than the other?

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    I think that depends. But I wonder if that Zofia woman knows.
    It's not income unless the gf would decide to list it as income(and then it would only be so nominally, it was still not given to her as income), which I have no clue why she would do that since I'm pretty sure that would mean she'd have to pay higher taxes on it.

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Do you think the physical effort with which a woman derived her income makes one more valid than the other?
    I have no idea what this means.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    Maybe this is a crass question but I am really curious if my theory is right or not.

    If you like a "civilian" woman at what point are you comfortable with investing in your lady/giving her cash if she asks/offering cash if you see it's something she needs, etc? I'm not talking about the average paying for dates, birthday gifts, holiday gifts, etc... I'm referring to more than this
    I know this OP is aimed toward the M or F partner to the woman in a relationship, but I'd just like to add that in my SW/RW experiences, intimate relationships in both, I found civvie relationships to be the cheapos. Many civvie men like to financial-shame/guilt both civvie women and SWers -- especially SWers. Civvie women are easier to wrangle for the cheapos, as the civvie women don't have the experience SWers do in man management, but I have seen the cheap/shame/guilt-tripping over-and-over in civvie life, both my own & civvie friends' lives.
    Last edited by BondGirl007; 01-12-2018 at 06:35 AM.
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by BondGirl007 View Post
    I know this OP is aimed toward the M or F partner to the woman in a relationship, but I'd just like to add that in my SW/RW experiences, intimate relationships in both, I found civvie relationships to be the cheapos. Many civvie men like to financial-shame/guilt both civvie women and SWers -- especially SWers. Civvie women are easier to wrangle for the cheapos, as the civvie women don't have the experience SWers do in man management, but I have seen the cheap/shame/guilt-tripping over-and-over in civvie life, both my own & civvie friends' lives.
    From the opposite corner, based on what I've seen with friends, this is true.
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    My point is money is not falling from the sky - everyone on this thread derives income from other people. The 4 hours you clock in giving lap dances is no different from the 4 hours a sugar baby spends having dinner with her sd, same 4 hours a wife spends cooking/cleaning for her family, same 4 hours a gf spends on a date with her rich bf, same 4 hours an escort spends with her client.

    Your hustle is no different. It's all the same.
    I've seen this theory espoused before on here and I wholeheartedly disagree with the notion that what a wife does for her family is the same as what sex workers do for their customers/clients. It is not. What sex workers do is transactional and the guys have no ongoing obligations to them beyond paying the current tab. Wives, on the other hands, are in partnerships and benefit from the wealth accumulation of the couple. They also derive the emotional benefits that come with being part of a family unit, which can be immense. And before someone trots out "prenups!" like they are widely used, they in fact are not the norm, but rather the exception. Most couples of a similar age start out in less than affluent situations and build from there.

    Now do all marriages work the way they should? Of course not. But in theory the husband and wife are both part of something larger than themselves as individuals. Where these partnerships often break down is when one partner is stuck in his/her own head and either loses sight or stops caring about the bigger picture.

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  29. #70
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Bahuba View Post
    From the opposite corner, based on what I've seen with friends, this is true.
    And it's actually fairly offensive when cheapos are not kind and generous with civvies especially, as generally these women who have their basic RW jobs and sources of income don't have the access to the kind of money & independence that SWers have available to them if they are wise -- unless the civvie woman is independent and in business for herself in one way or another, and that woman is generally too outspoken, assertive, and too threatening for cheapo man. Bottom line is that there is definitely a battle of the sexes, and it revolves around sex, power, and money.
    "Everything in the world is about sex except sex. Sex is about power. " ~ Oscar Wilde
    Last edited by BondGirl007; 01-12-2018 at 11:46 AM.
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  31. #71
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post
    I've seen this theory espoused before on here and I wholeheartedly disagree with the notion that what a wife does for her family is the same as what sex workers do for their customers/clients. It is not. What sex workers do is transactional and the guys have no ongoing obligations to them beyond paying the current tab. Wives, on the other hands, are in partnerships and benefit from the wealth accumulation of the couple. They also derive the emotional benefits that come with being part of a family unit, which can be immense. And before someone trots out "prenups!" like they are widely used, they in fact are not the norm, but rather the exception. Most couples of a similar age start out in less than affluent situations and build from there.

    Now do all marriages work the way they should? Of course not. But in theory the husband and wife are both part of something larger than themselves as individuals. Where these partnerships often break down is when one partner is stuck in his/her own head and either loses sight or stops caring about the bigger picture.
    You said wives "Benefit from wealth accumulation"......please elaborate - because that sounds like a transactional element to me?

    And I can guarantee, if money/assets/wealth is not considered via prenup on the front end, it is during a divorce, especially if the dude cheated (which many of them do), ...... It's going to be transactional.

    Also while some are okay with not placing that much emphasis on economic standing of their partner, others will not marry "down" so to speak. Part of the reason they marry is to continue building family fortunes.

    I think marriage does have a transactional element to it. Even in the most loving relationships....the money aspect is always there.
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 01-12-2018 at 10:09 AM.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    ^^Do you know what a 'straw man argument' is? It's when someone tries to win a debate by dismantling arguments that that their opponent never made.

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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Marriage benefits the husband and divorce favors the wife.

    Moving on -- I'm married myself and I enjoy not having to worry about the basic things such as rent, food, transportation and etc. When I was living on my own, I spent thousands upon thousands of my SW income on basic necessities. The irony in this is that SW income =/= men who were keeping a roof over my hand. Ever since I can remember, a man has always helped me out . . . as I have "helped" them.

    Nonetheless, I guess the only difference now is that one man is putting a roof over my head. However, just because the bare necessities are taken care of doesn't mean that I abandon my own nest egg. My mother always told me to keep a separate checking account just for yourself and out sight/knowledge from the husband . . . just in case. In this economy, you never know and relationships don't last forever. Money changes. People change. Things change.

    Oh, and for the record, (when we were dating) my husband paid for my college tuition and even helped on rent a couple of times when I couldn't make ends meet. One of the reasons why I'm with him today is because he showed that he was willing to invest in me. I bypassed cars, cash and clothes just to get the proverbial 'golden ticket' towards a better education. After all, a college degree is something that no one - not even a man - can take away.

    To answer the OP's question: Get what you can out of men, but don't let that be all you know. We are living in the 21st century . . . not the 1950's. Women don't need men to survive and men sure as hell don't need women to survive either.
    Last edited by sexyadrienne; 01-12-2018 at 11:27 PM.
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by miss.a.p1600 View Post
    When I say investing in a woman I mean someone you have a relationship (could be short term or long term) with and I mean something that would help her reach her goals and or improve her economic standing or improve her quality of life - like invest in her business/career/education/favorite charities/etc.
    You use the word "invest" and I do not invest in anything, unless I expect to get a good return on my investment. You have to convince me of that. For example, if you want me to pay for your gym membership, clothes, cosmetics, etc., you have to tell me that you want to look good for me - that I'm getting the hottest version of you as a return on my investment.

    I love sexy/fetish outfits, so I could invest money in your sexy/fetish wardrobe, because I get a direct benefit from it. You need a stripper pole? No problem, as long as you pole dance for me as a regular part of our foreplay.

    If you have a business and want me to invest in it, I will first determine whether it has the potential to be lucrative, and then, I would ask you whether I will be receiving any shares of stock (or partnership/membership interest, etc.) in exchange for my investment. If I get an interest in the business, even if it is a nominal minority interest, I will be more interested in making the investment.

    If you want a loan and offer to sign a promissory note and pay me a nominal interest rate, I would be more likely to loan you the money, than if you just asked me to hand you money as a "loan".

    I need to feel that you are not taking advantage of me; that, you are offering me something in return.
    Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
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  38. #75
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    Default Re: Men --- When Do You Start Spending Money on "civilian" women???

    Quote Originally Posted by Genoveve View Post
    ^^Do you know what a 'straw man argument' is? It's when someone tries to win a debate by dismantling arguments that that their opponent never made.

    Perhaps I unwittingly engaged in some straw man argument - but in regards to Rick Dugans comment what I heard him say is that marriage (especially the type when one partner is the main income earner) is - in his point of view - different from women deriving income from adult work/vanilla work (with the exception of people who draft/sign prenups) because it is not "transactional" but I provided a different viewpoint because I believe that most relationships, including marriages, are transactional.

    In general, humans are inherently self-serving and do not go into situations/relationships/careers without some benefit/some form of advancement for themselves or for their current/future families. But Maybe his definition of 'transactional' is different from mine.

    Quote Originally Posted by sexyadrienne View Post
    Marriage benefits the husband and divorce favors the wife.

    Moving on -- I'm married myself and I enjoy not having to worry about the basic things such as rent, food, transportation and etc. When I was living on my own, I spent thousands upon thousands of my SW income on basic necessities. The irony in this is that SW income =/= men who were keeping a roof over my hand. Ever since I can remember, a man has always helped me out . . . as I have "helped" them.

    Nonetheless, I guess the only difference now is that one man is putting a roof over my head. However, just because the bare necessities are taken care of doesn't mean that I abandon my own nest egg. My mother always told me to keep a separate checking account just for yourself and out sight/knowledge from the husband . . . just in case. In this economy, you never know and relationships don't last forever. Money changes. People change. Things change.

    Oh, and for the record, (when we were dating) my husband paid for my college tuition and even helped on rent a couple of times when I couldn't make ends meet. One of the reasons why I'm with him today is because he showed that he was willing to invest in me. I bypassed cars, cash and clothes just to get the proverbial 'golden ticket' towards a better education. After all, a college degree is something that no one - not even a man - can take away.

    To answer the OP's question: Get what you can out of men, but don't let that be all you know. We are living in the 21st century . . . not the 1950's. Women don't need men to survive and men sure as hell don't need women to survive either.
    Thanks for sharing Adrienne. Sounds like you and other ladies here have good husbands.

    And you have a point (which I did mention on a few occasions in the thread) that stacking your own coins to use how you want with your control is always the smart/wise thing to do. However I am not sure how ladies do this without the husband knowing?

    Quote Originally Posted by jack0177057 View Post
    You use the word "invest" and I do not invest in anything, unless I expect to get a good return on my investment. You have to convince me of that. For example, if you want me to pay for your gym membership, clothes, cosmetics, etc., you have to tell me that you want to look good for me - that I'm getting the hottest version of you as a return on my investment.

    I love sexy/fetish outfits, so I could invest money in your sexy/fetish wardrobe, because I get a direct benefit from it. You need a stripper pole? No problem, as long as you pole dance for me as a regular part of our foreplay.

    If you have a business and want me to invest in it, I will first determine whether it has the potential to be lucrative, and then, I would ask you whether I will be receiving any shares of stock (or partnership/membership interest, etc.) in exchange for my investment. If I get an interest in the business, even if it is a nominal minority interest, I will be more interested in making the investment.

    If you want a loan and offer to sign a promissory note and pay me a nominal interest rate, I would be more likely to loan you the money, than if you just asked me to hand you money as a "loan".

    I need to feel that you are not taking advantage of me; that, you are offering me something in return.
    I wouldn't doubt many men share your perspective jack. And while I was more specifically referring to money given to 'civilian' women for use towards appreciating assets, I could see where bf's would give money in the other ways with the purpose you mention.

    I really don't agree with situations/"transactions"/relationships/etc where people taking advantage of one another.

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