View Poll Results: Should you sell to a customer who is actively tipping the stage?

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  • Yes, it's acceptable.

    3 37.50%
  • No, it's unacceptable.

    3 37.50%
  • Don't care/other

    2 25.00%
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Thread: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

  1. #1
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    Question Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    First time poster, sorta long time reader.

    Recently had the experience at the club where I was sitting in the front row (no actual rail here) lightly tipping the stage dances, and I had three dancers come up to me after their sets and sit in my lap while I was trying to enjoy said shows.

    The attempt to get me to the LD room immediately after the set was understandable, but trying to push the sale after I said "no, I'm going to tip the stage for a while" was not. In one case, the next dancer was a song into HER set - I almost had to dump the dancer off my lap so I could put my tip down (because after saying no, I was pointedly ignoring the dancer in my lap.)

    My question is, isn't there some sort of etiquette about this? That is to say, if someone's sitting at a back row/table/whatever they're fair game, but front row and actively spending on the stage is not - because you're getting between another dancer and tips?

    As I'm reading this, I suspect some context/background will be useful. Seattle downtown club, so stage tipping doesn't seem to be where the "real" money is made. I was tipping $2 per set, in between the two songs of the set - hardly a big spender. Dancers got the tip no matter what - I feel like I should be putting something down if I'm watching the show from the front row. This has happened occasionally to me in the past, but usually only once every two or three times I went to a club - I chalked it up to a rude dancer. Three times was enough to make me sit back and wonder if there was a shift somewhere and I didn't notice it.

    I suspect the tipping culture + more competition is my answer, but I also took this (don't bother someone spending at the rail) as a pretty absolute rule - some insight from dancers in a neutral environment would be appreciated.

    Thanks!

    (hey, what the hell, might as well make it a poll so others don't have to read the whole damn thread.)

    Edit: Sigh. Should've used better wording in the poll, like "tipping another dancer at the stage"

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    I don't think there are any rules. Dancers have varying approaches to sales. Some use a harder sell than others. You should be happy though, three dancers thought you were a baller :-) we regularly get guys in here asking how to get attention in the club. You seem to have the better problem.
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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    Agree completely Bahuba. I don't mind telling a dancer no, but thank you. I'd rather do that then have to try and hail someone from across the room or something.

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bahuba View Post
    I don't think there are any rules. Dancers have varying approaches to sales. Some use a harder sell than others. You should be happy though, three dancers thought you were a baller :-) we regularly get guys in here asking how to get attention in the club. You seem to have the better problem.
    I've been coming into this club pretty much since it opened (in 2007, I think.) I don't know a lot of the dancers because I'm usually only in once every few months, but the staff at least recognizes me by now. Maybe they're putting in a good word for me ("yes, he spends plenty of money") without giving the detail that I always watch/tip a few hours of stage shows first before moving on to LD/VIP? Who knows.

    Quote Originally Posted by Titus23 View Post
    Agree completely Bahuba. I don't mind telling a dancer no, but thank you. I'd rather do that then have to try and hail someone from across the room or something.
    To be fair, the question is less about the attention or how to deflect, and more about "I thought it was really rude to interrupt a tipping first-row customer."

    I don't think anyone's explicitly said it's a bad thing to me, but when I'm in the tipping portion of my club visits, the visits from the dancers are almost always a lot shorter and get closed out by "well, I'll let you enjoy the stage show, I'll come check in on your later" or something to that effect.

    I think the only exception to that (other than the "rude" girls, who maybe weren't?) was a really slow night where a dancer just sat on my lap (even after I said I'm neither tipping her nor getting a dance from her) and critiqued the stage shows with me. That was actually more fun than expected because I WAS able to still enjoy the dances, and to her credit, I DID end up getting VIP with her after a couple of hours. Longest sell ever?

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    It's bad etiquette EXCEPT when the club is dead af/lots of dancers/extreme competition and/or they don't like the bish on stage.

    For example, if Bubbles cutthroat you earlier in the day ---> she must now be taught a lesson and her potential clients/tip money is gone

    Or some dancers have no sense of etiquette and just do whatever tf they want without thinking about anyone else.

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    I did have a dancer once tell me to sit at the stage so no one would try and steal me away, so there is definitely some sort of etiquette in play. She stayed with me a bit watching the show before she went back to work. Sure enough, no one bothered me until she came back.

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    Rude rude rude. But not uncommon

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    If there isn't many customers/ too many girls in the club then this could possibly happen. It is rude though. If I am on stage and a customer is tipping then I am giving that customer one-on-one and I'll talk to him. Before I get off stage, I tell him to wait for me and not get dances from any other girls while I go freshen up. I don't give other dancers the opportunity to steal his attention but at the end of the day, this job is a hustle.

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    Quote Originally Posted by NikkiToTheStage View Post
    If there isn't many customers/ too many girls in the club then this could possibly happen. It is rude though. If I am on stage and a customer is tipping then I am giving that customer one-on-one and I'll talk to him. Before I get off stage, I tell him to wait for me and not get dances from any other girls while I go freshen up. I don't give other dancers the opportunity to steal his attention but at the end of the day, this job is a hustle.
    All these responses are good, but the scenario in yours is particularly interesting to me - stage tipping seldom gets an actual one-on-one experience here in Seattle, at least in the clubs I've been to and/or with the money I've been dropping. The one-on-one at the rail for a buck was definitely a lot more common back in NC around the military base I was at, but stage tipping was also a lot more common (at least about 10-15 years ago when I was there) than it seems to be here in Seattle. Drunk and broke Marines looking for the cheap thrills, I guess.

    I kind of don't want the public "private" experience anymore - if I'm at the stage, I'm just looking at pretty women and deciding who appeals to my sensibilities that night for lap dances. I view the stage tip as more of an "admission" fee for sitting there than a specific expression of interest. My stage tips have no bearing on who I ask for a lap dance.

    You're also the second one to mention that this might happen if the club is slow, and I'm betting that had a lot to do with it now that I'm thinking of it. I'm usually not paying attention to other customers when I'm at the stage, but I was there quite a bit earlier than usual that night. I don't think I was the only one in the club, but it's entirely possible. I usually feel bad for "making" dancers get up on stage just because I show up, because I take my club nights slow. I'm perfectly happy to sit down with my diet Coke and listen to the music for a while.

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    Default Re: Is sitting with/on a customer who is at the "rail" considered acceptable?

    Depends. If it is someone I usually dance for I might. If I know they are specifically trying to see some particular girl on the stage hell no!
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