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Thread: This breaks my heart

  1. #1
    God/dess WendiStarr's Avatar
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    Default This breaks my heart

    This woman was going through a custody battle with her ex. I understand how overwhelming, stressful, and tough that it can be to go through a custody battle with an ex. However I absolutely cannot understand the logic of what she did. This is just awful. I feel that this is especially unfair to the child. :-( I don't care that she was a former playboy playmate but of course, in our time of focusing on "evil sex workers" and people wanting to portray us all in a negative light, of course that's what people are more hung up on.

    https://www.yahoo.com/news/former-pl...153822825.html

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    That's just so sad.

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    God/dess SnuffleUffleGrass's Avatar
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    I read the article....people kept mentioning she had "personality issues."

    Normally I support the birth mother having a relationship with her child but in this case it all ended very badly.

    Just a terrible shame. I'm sure the hotel & its workers are pretty upset.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Why do so many suicidal parents feel the need to take their kids with them? I just don't get it. This story is beyond tragic.

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    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Mental health/Family therapy should be mandatory for couples in the court system battling for custody, child support, etc.

    Sad but I assume a large percentage of families shuffled through the court system are unhealthy in their dynamic of how they relate to one another and if the child's rights are what is important then psych evals on the parents should take place when there are reports of dysfunctional co-parenting/parenting.

    Sounds like the woman was so unhappy having to co-parent with her ex, that the only way she knew out was death. It is possible, if misery loves company, if she was extremely unhappy with her life, then she did not want her ex to be happy either.

    She probably knew if she murked herself, no one would miss her - well maybe her kid but her ex could just brainwash the kid and replace her with his new mom/new wife and move on as though she never existed. If she took the kid with her, her ex would not be able to get custody, never see the kid again, and would hurt emotionally

    It is possible she could have received mental/psychiatric help to turn things around for her for the benefit of the kid.

    Unfortunately no one saw the warning signs and she took 2 lives.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    I can't understand why parents who aren't together, won't work things out with each other to the point where they can at least be civil to one another for the sake of their child or children, especially if they don't have to see each other more than once every few weeks.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    I don't know how many of you have friends who are divorcing with children, but it is a dark, shitty world for them. Their identities become consumed by it. All you will do is listen to them cry, rage, threaten, say awful shit, contemplate suicide, and worse.
    Where Am I? Missing NYC

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  12. #8
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Quote Originally Posted by eagle2 View Post
    I can't understand why parents who aren't together, won't work things out with each other to the point where they can at least be civil to one another for the sake of their child or children, especially if they don't have to see each other more than once every few weeks.
    Precisely! You'd think living separate lives would help but....

    My theory is ... One of or Both the parents are just not equipped to handle the challenges of being single parent, co-parenting, blended families, divorcing, etc. and/or they are mentally ill and this stress triggers severely negative behaviors.

    It would be easy to say. Hey don't procreate with people who have act like plum fools but sometimes these people are good at portraying themselves in the best light, holding it together for a long time, and their true colors aren't seen until after the kid(s) are in the picture. Still gotta be wise about procreation but sometimes you just never know how a person will react/what will make them snap.

    A lot of it is about ego and control as well. It's not easy having the government force the average person/tell the average person how to raise their family or giving up control of child rearing to an ill-equipped ex.

    It would be nice to have a mock family/marriage with a person - to test how they respond in all situations - before actually committing for life with someone who could be deranged and make life hell.
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 05-19-2018 at 12:23 PM.

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    God/dess WendiStarr's Avatar
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    ^ I went through a custody battle myself. It was awful hell, but I never once thought about killing myself or my child. It just amazes me how selfish some people can be that they would not only kill themselves but their innocent child as well.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    I wish she never took her child with her down like that. Imagine the fear the kid went through....

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Quote Originally Posted by Bahuba View Post
    I don't know how many of you have friends who are divorcing with children, but it is a dark, shitty world for them. Their identities become consumed by it. All you will do is listen to them cry, rage, threaten, say awful shit, contemplate suicide, and worse.
    I believe it. My mom stuck it out like a saint even though she wanted out. She waited until we were 18 and moved out. Probably not the best decision for many reasons but she went through a lot just for us.

    I think it all depends on the severity of the other partner and level of unfairness with the system to make someone snap like that. Watched a show where a woman knew she couldn't save her kid from the abusive dad due to the shitty court system and killed her kid off along with her. Not something I would ever consider ever. I still feel for that woman's struggle.

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  20. #12
    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Quote Originally Posted by WendiStarr View Post
    ^ I went through a custody battle myself. It was awful hell, but I never once thought about killing myself or my child. It just amazes me how selfish some people can be that they would not only kill themselves but their innocent child as well.
    I wondered similar. Like why, if she felt so compelled to kill in ordered to hurt her ex, then why did she not just kill her ex then kill herself and leave the kid to live.

    Could be she was going through some sort of post-partum psychosis - women like this, where it is untreated, never really feel connected to their kids in the sense the average sane mother would. And they aren't viewing death in the same way either.

    Remember that story of Andrea Yates I think is her name where she drowned her kids. Her husband knew she was not right mentally but did nothing to help her and the kids died while in her care. Once she started getting psychiatric treatment, she did a complete 180 but unfortunately the kids paid the price while she was walking around undiagnosed/untreated.

    Some of these fathers know the mom is not right mentally and they could care less and instead they run off, ignore the problem, or turn up the litigation further causing them to snap.

    *Disclaimer - I am not justifying senseless murders, suicides, harming self or others just some thoughts on why a person would do something like this
    Last edited by miss.a.p1600; 05-19-2018 at 04:56 PM.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Quote Originally Posted by Vyanka View Post
    I wish she never took her child with her down like that. Imagine the fear the kid went through....
    Me too. I wish she went for help instead of choosing to end things.

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  23. #14
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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Killing herself is sad

    Killing her 7 yr old son who was old enough to know better and plead w mom is criminal and I hope the child find peace and the mother does not

    That’s beyond selfish no matter how depressed you are

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    The woman from the original post had a very messy life long before her suicide. I just read this from the New York Post, not the best publication I know.

    https://nypost.com/2013/11/20/fired-...playmate-boss/

    She’s a self-proclaimed lesbian who’s married to a man, but former Playboy Playmate Stephanie Adams doesn’t want any “too cute” gals working around her hubby.

    In court papers filed Wednesday, yoga teacher Dilek Edwards charges she was illegally fired last month by Adams from the Wall Street chiropractic clinic the former nude model co-owns with her husband, Charles Nicolai.

    Edwards’ firing came after Nicolai had warned her in June that his wife “might become jealous” of the flexible young blonde because she’s “too cute,” the suit says.

    And on Oct. 30, Edwards claims she got a “frantic,” 1:31 a.m. text message from Adams that said, “You are NOT welcome any longer at Wall Street Chiropractic, DO NOT ever step foot in there again, and stay the F–K away from my husband and family!!!!!!!

    Edwards’ firing came after Nicolai had warned her in June that his wife “might become jealous” of the flexible young blonde because she’s “too cute,” the suit says.

    And on Oct. 30, Edwards claims she got a “frantic,” 1:31 a.m. text message from Adams that said, “You are NOT welcome any longer at Wall Street Chiropractic, DO NOT ever step foot in there again, and stay the F–K away from my husband and family!!!!!!!”

    “And remember I warned you,” Adams allegedly added.

    Edwards, 32, insists that her relationship with Nicolai was “purely professional” and that she has no clue what sparked Adams’ “absurd suspicions.”

    Reached Wednesday, however, she told The Post Nicolai had her give him yoga-therapy sessions to alleviate pain from an accident — but told her that “it had to be a secret.”

    “He said if his wife hears about it, she can create some scenarios,” Edwards said.

    Her suit seeks unspecified damages from Adams and Nicolai, alleging sexual harassment, gender discrimination and unlawful termination.

    Adams, 43, denied her allegations and sniffed that there’s no way she’s jealous of the younger woman’s looks.

    “No disrespect to anyone — but I’m a centerfold,” she said.

    Adams became the first openly lesbian Playmate after being featured as Miss November in 1992 and last year said, “I still identify myself as LGBT,” despite having twice gotten married to men and bearing a son with Nicolai.

    She has also claimed to be a “direct descendant” of Presidents John Adams and John Quincy Adams.

    “I can only imagine they’re rolling over in their graves because of the outrageous behavior of their purported descendant,” said Edwards’ lawyer, Maimon Kirschenbaum.

    Last year, Adams made headlines when she won $1.2  million from the city over her 2006 arrest for allegedly threatening to shoot a cabby — even though she was wearing skintight clothing with nowhere to hide a weapon.

    Adams’ lawyer, Doug Wigdor, said Adams filed a complaint with cops after Edwards allegedly threatened Nicolai that she would kill him and his family if she got fired.

    Wigdor also said of Edwards’ claims: “I don’t understand how any of this constitutes gender discrimination.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    From the sound of it the woman had serious mental problems. I'm hoping her ex pursues legal action in family court on behalf of his son. That was no way for an innocent kid to have to die.

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    Default Re: This breaks my heart

    Sad to say this goes on every day. I don't have a problem with children but I'm so glad I don't have any of my own.

    Having children is difficult in its own right alone due to financial cost and crazy world we live in today with all the shootings, but add in a difficult X/husband or wife and parenting can truly become a nightmare.

    Again, I don't think people realize how common this is. Bitter custody battles routinely turn into homicide investigations.

    http://gunmemorial.org/women

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