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Thread: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

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    Question Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Probably a random thing to bring up...

    Does anyone who travels worry about this as well? Or does anyone work at a club that has this issue and it's becoming annoying? Obviously there is drama at all clubs. But if I knew that screaming matches, threats, or fighting is tolerated or management has zero control over the working environment before I try it out ... I would most likely skip it. Unfortunately, there is no way to know for sure until you're trying to get out of the way of two girls who are losing their shit or worse some drunk crazy pants going off on you because their regular said hi to you and I hate that. I don't get involved but I hate working in enviroments where the drama and cliqueyness has overshadowed the hustle and reason why we are all in there in the first place. It makes me feel unsafe and it's just plain annoying.

    I am not saying it is a HUGE worry but I noticed that I worry more now than ever about being attacked at work when I try clubs while I travel. It's like rolling dice. TBH I get a little freaked out at the end of the night in the dressing room. I love dancing... enjoy traveling and trying new clubs. It has become a fun thing for me to do here and there. I prefer working at upscale clubs or larger clubs with a lot of girls because in my experience you don't have to worry as much (of course I know there's still drama) and the club usually has things in control but I like trying small clubs too because it's usually easy money.

    I am not naive.. I know there are going to be assholes here and there.. there's alllllways one or two. I stay out of it. I am short, respectful and mostly pleasant towards everyone and I am the type to get in, make money and get out. Anytime someone starts with me or makes passive aggressive comments (happens a lot the first few nights) I pretty much ignore them and go about my business - making money.

    I am just curious and thought I'd see what you all will say or evennn if anyone wants to warn me of any clubs that have a serious problem with it
    Last edited by m1nx; 10-29-2018 at 01:52 PM.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    I can think of a few but it’s not really something you find yourself in the middle of unless you work there for a while. When you’re just passing through it’s very easy to stay out of the drama or not even notice it. I’ve never had an issue when traveling.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    In general, I try to avoid clubs that are very extras heavy (aka brothels lol). They attract the most drama and shady personality types. I’m not talking about nice clubs that will occasionally allow stuff in the VIPs for the right amount $ or the right girl/customer...I’m talking about trashy, divey places that are 100% all about f*cking and transactions are openly discussed. And also, any club that is lenient about and allows drug use. Those are 2 major red flags to look for.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Get a taser and keep it in your purse? I took a martial arts class after this girl threatened me at work; I feel more confident. I’m still not a fighter, but the most important things is to watch for danger and avoid it (like you said you already do). There’s no rules once someone puts their hands on me. My self defense teacher taught us you do whatever to get away from danger. Self-defense is not about fighting to win its about staying alive and not getting hurt. I learned a few moves- the classic eye poke, nose shove, throat punch, step on toes. Mostly self defense is about being aware of potential threats and deescalating the situation. I’m not an easy person to bait and I’ve never been in a fight in my dancing career.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    I understand that you can’t really do this while you’re in the club, but you it’s better to have whatever you use to defend yourself on your person rather than in your purse whenever possible. Purses are snatched away too easily, plus, if you’re anything like me, yours probably looks a little chaotic inside. I normally wear dresses or skirts, so I have a band which goes around my thigh and it holds holsters for my pepper spray and my handgun. I’ve been fortunate in that I haven’t been subject to any real drama directed at me, but I’ve seen it happen, so I feel the concern is legit. At the same time, most of what I’ve seen of it were empty threats.
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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Quote Originally Posted by AChildOfBoredom View Post
    I understand that you can’t really do this while you’re in the club, but you it’s better to have whatever you use to defend yourself on your person rather than in your purse whenever possible. Purses are snatched away too easily, plus, if you’re anything like me, yours probably looks a little chaotic inside. I normally wear dresses or skirts, so I have a band which goes around my thigh and it holds holsters for my pepper spray and my handgun. I’ve been fortunate in that I haven’t been subject to any real drama directed at me, but I’ve seen it happen, so I feel the concern is legit. At the same time, most of what I’ve seen of it were empty threats.
    Yeah, mostly it’s girls just trying to be intimidating. There’s several things that happen BEFORE a fight. Usally a girl gets triggered. I learned to play the okay game with abusive men-it works with most triggered people. If they aren’t bat shit crazy, they realize later their response was waaayyy out of proportion to the perceived offense. I usually get an apology and we try to have a good working relationship.

    Girl: “you’re a whore”
    Me: “okay”
    Girl: “you’re a bitch”
    Me:”okay”
    Girl: “you’re a cunt”
    Me :”okay”

    Every answer is “okay” ————>walk closer to nearest exit

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    I’m not a confrontational person, and I really don’t need to be. I get along pretty well with the other dancers, and the only ones who’ve come at me looking for drama were fresh faces, so someone’s usually warning them to back off. Some of us do hang out outside of club. The rest, either we get along or we ignore each other.
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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Quote Originally Posted by Ifyouseekamy View Post
    If they aren’t bat shit crazy, they realize later their response was waaayyy out of proportion to the perceived offense.
    So right i like that!

    Quote Originally Posted by Ifyouseekamy View Post
    Girl: “you’re a whore”
    Me: “okay”
    Girl: “you’re a bitch”
    Me:”okay”
    Girl: “you’re a cunt”
    Me :”okay”

    Every answer is “okay” ————>walk closer to nearest exit

    I am the same.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Quote Originally Posted by Ifyouseekamy View Post
    Get a taser and keep it in your purse? I took a martial arts class after this girl threatened me at work; I feel more confident. I’m still not a fighter, but the most important things is to watch for danger and avoid it (like you said you already do). There’s no rules once someone puts their hands on me. My self defense teacher taught us you do whatever to get away from danger. Self-defense is not about fighting to win its about staying alive and not getting hurt. I learned a few moves- the classic eye poke, nose shove, throat punch, step on toes. Mostly self defense is about being aware of potential threats and deescalating the situation. I’m not an easy person to bait and I’ve never been in a fight in my dancing career.

    I wouldn't ever bring anything like that in the club but I think self-defense classes are a smart idea. The fights I have seen in the club or even videos of them are horrific. I don't know how it doesn't cross their minds that they can seriously hurt someone .. it's not worth it. So it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to take some basic classes to protect myself. Never thought of that.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    I do wish there was a way to know before going in who has a zero tolerance policy (and sticks to it) and who doesn't. Of course there's not.. IMO the whole energy is different in the dressing room and on the floor, everyone is more focused on work and money is easier to make. At one really small club the manager actually warned me about the girls and I'm like.. if you have to warn the new ones then are you even the manager ??? What's worse is when a customer warns you! True story and he wasn't lying!

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Quote Originally Posted by m1nx View Post
    I do wish there was a way to know before going in who has a zero tolerance policy (and sticks to it) and who doesn't. Of course there's not.. IMO the whole energy is different in the dressing room and on the floor, everyone is more focused on work and money is easier to make. At one really small club the manager actually warned me about the girls and I'm like.. if you have to warn the new ones then are you even the manager ??? What's worse is when a customer warns you! True story and he wasn't lying!
    It’s not worth the money to stay at a club that tolerates violence. Its happened at my home club, but not very often. I also tip the bouncers well. They know who feeds them, so I usually get my way. Which all that means if a guy is harassing me or a girl is being a bully they’ll deal with it.

    When traveling I don’t think there’s anyway to know 100% just trust your gut and stay out of the dressing room.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Quote Originally Posted by m1nx View Post
    I wouldn't ever bring anything like that in the club but I think self-defense classes are a smart idea. The fights I have seen in the club or even videos of them are horrific. I don't know how it doesn't cross their minds that they can seriously hurt someone .. it's not worth it. So it probably wouldn't be a bad idea to take some basic classes to protect myself. Never thought of that.
    I took Krav Maga classes in case you want to know, so you can google it. I’ve taken Karate, but Krav Maga is the best to deal with real world fighting. Especially since we don’t want to win, we want to stay safe and still have pretty faces afterwards.

    Most crazy girls are too unstable to stay at a club for many years. Just ignore them and make money. They’ll move on eventually to another club or something. It’s been my strategy for years.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    Corporate clubs don't tolerate potential serious violence on premises. (LAWSUITS CITY BB!)



    A lot of major chain clubs like Rick's, Delilah's, & Spearmint Rhino have Las Vegas style camera security. If you throw up in a potted plant or fall over drunk while doing lapdances…..they see it, they'll address it. Same thing with the girls who try to start catfights or the customers doing coke in VIP.


    Dive bars are a different case. They usually handle issues "right there."

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    delete.
    Last edited by m1nx; 03-15-2019 at 02:19 PM.

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    Default Re: Feeling unsafe at club/clubs that tolerate violence or excessive drama

    I love cameras too most of the time. Only time I don't is if I smack a customer, and the idiot is trying to get me in trouble when he's a God damn pos that needs to be trained how to behave.

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