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Thread: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

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    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Hi ya'll. I'm not the best writer, but I'd like to share a story of something I've recently/am currently dealing with.

    2016 -

    I was just getting on my feet with MFC. A client comes in and we hit it off through PM. He finishes my topic, we have an awesome private, all is well.
    The client proceeds to stop by more often. He tips super well, and he seems decent enough after skyping with him a few times. He has a very niche fetish, and I reincarnate the fantasy entirely too well.
    I was star-struck. I'd caught the biggest whale i've ever had. When he would "innocently" hit me up on skype seeing how I was, I had zero issues responding. Why would I? My weekly goal was pretty much met by him, and it required much less work. (OR, so I thought.)


    Fast forward a few months -

    Client is in my room every single time I stream. [Red flag.] He's still tipping exorbitant amounts, online and offline, so it doesn't bother me so much. Our small chit chats on skype have turned into full-blown daily conversations. But...I'm only streaming 2-3 times a week now. The rest of the time is just filled up with making some clips and texting on skype. I thought, cool - Texting is easy AF. This job has gotten so easy!


    2017 -

    Client has not missed a single stream. [Red flag.] He's still tipping exorbitant amounts, online and offline, but i'm starting to get a little concerned as to why he's ALWAYS on. But - one of the goals of being a cam-model is to get that person hooked on you. OK, so, maybe he just REALLY likes hanging out and blowing through his paycheck weekly on online porn. IDK. A little weird, but whatever. The conversations seem to solely revolve around his niche. Texting used to feel easy, but now it's starting to feel harder then camming. The conversations seem to repeat. At times I wonder if this is what the twilight zone actually is. Alright - He's definitely a tad obsessed. Milk it?


    Fast forward a few months -

    Client has not missed a single stream. He's still tipping exorbitant amounts, online and offline. Amazon wishlist'ing, too. What a shit mistake on my end. For a brief period, I didn't have my P.O box and when I moved, I switched the wishlist address to mine for the time-being. During that time, one of the items was not delivered and was returned to client with the address of where it was supposed to go. Upon learning that information, a quick google search and BAM - there's my name.
    He told me not to worry and to take down the wishlist in case this ever happens. As shitty of a moment that was, I wasn't totally concerned. This person has given so much and does genuinely attempt to better my life. He even proof-read my college essays, for hecks sake.


    End of 2017 -

    Client has not missed a single stream. Still tipping excessively. Client is now attempting to help out with making me content. He is basically taking privates recorded on MFC and giving them to me. Double-edge whammy because occasionally I can make use of the content but most of the time, I hate it. Client gets frustrated and upset when I don't want to use the content. Makes any attempt at trying to fix it for the better. I'm starting to feel really exhausted talking all the time. I feel like I have no privacy. He won't go away. He continues having the same conversation over and over. I'm starting to lose my mind. I barely stream anymore. I don't feel motivated to make clips anymore. At least I still don't have to worry about money. Thank goodness for savings. Oh, and he sent a christmas card. It was creepy.


    *****Yes. I could have blocked him. But someone that has been this invested in me, on top of knowing personal information really sketched me out. I didn't want to create a conflict. Who the f**k knows what he's capable of?****

    Start of 2018 -

    Client has not missed a stream, but I'm barely on anymore. Still tipping. It fluctuates, but it's still good $. Barely making clips either. I've resorted to just posting the clips so he shuts the f**k up about them. He gets really annoyed when I don't respond. I've been trying to keep busy and say as such, but the messages just continue and continue. I'm actually going insane. So many red flags showing up, and yet I feel completely vulnerable. It's a miracle I still have some other fans. He feels like a cockroach that never leaves. I'm feeling disheartens. Idk what to do. How do I get out of this shit mess? Do I just quit?



    Mid 2018 -

    Client has not missed a stream, barely on. Tipping is slowing down, but now that I'm so used to not being online, it feels like literal hell. I've been way too spoiled throughout all of this. I decided to make a NF account under a different alias name and twitter just to have some space. Literally everywhere but NF is infested with him. Why won't he stop messaging me? Doesn't he have better things to do with his time then make me shitty clips and talk all day?



    Late 2018 -

    Client has not missed a stream, tipping is steady but slower. I broke down. I said that I couldn't continue talking the way I have been. I've become pretty busy. Client takes it rough. Guilt trips. Says manipulative things. I still continue to chat, but it's way less. This is the start of getting the fuck away.



    Early 2019 -

    Client has not missed a stream. Tipping is less. I say something horrible has happened on skype and I'll no longer be active. The only way he can communicate with me now is MV and twitter. I'm hoping he gets bored and moves on. I've stopped posting his clips, and pretty much any clip at this point.

    He is a big fan of another model. He was making her clips too. Apparently, she trusted him so much that she decided to give him ACCESS TO HER MV ACCOUNT. He literally posts most of her clips now. Pretty sure he's going crazy with spending on her now since I'm not getting much. IDC. AT ALL. Please - have another obsession other then me. It's actually disgusting - He even sends me the finished copy of whatever he's done and says I should give feedback. Lmao. Psycho psycho psycho psycho psycho.

    He now only contacts me via MV. I respond to appease, but things have become much more blunt.




    Current:


    Client has not missed a stream, but he hasn't tipped in a month. My college is finished and it's expected that I'd be online much more. I decided to throw a big lie out there and say that I found a contract job (Full time.) I'm in the process of rebranding my entire business with strict blocks and geo-blocks. New twitter, tweets protected, new everything. My goal is to basically disappear from this person's internet as best as I possibly can. I feel the safest from his presence on CMD, CB, and NF, so I'll probably be riding those out for awhile until some time has passed. This person knows too much about me, his demeanor has become full blown-creepy, and I'm not in the best position to get up and move. Luckily, the fans I still have understand that I've been dealing with someone like him and it's just the best idea that I came up with.


    MORAL OF THE STORY:

    Clingy customers, especially investor-type clients, can overall seriously damage your cam-career if it's taken too far. In my case, it went WAY further then I ever wanted it to, and I became so reliant on his high spending that I continued to feed into his narcissism and manipulative nature. Do everything in your power to protect your personal information. I was so DUMB to ever do something like that with my wishlist and I'm paying the price for it now. Make sure you're assertive with your boundaries because I made the mistake of being "too nice." Money can make people do stupid things - and unfortunately I was a stupid person to fall for it.
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns


  2. #2
    God/dess sexysusie's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    I'm sorry to hear you had a tough time with him. I've had a couple of similar experiences but nothing that has gone on that long. Those guys really are exhausting! At first it's great having al your money needs met by them but pretty soon you start avoiding cam and social media just to have a break from them. It sounds like he's found a new muse now though so at least you won't need to do too much to break ties with him, just let it fizzle out naturally.

    Have you built up a bit of a buffer? If so I'd suggest maybe taking a break, have a little holiday to get refreshed and then come back and start over, new pics, new vids, new approach. It'll feel like you have to drag your heels at first but keep going and it will get easier.

    Use this as a learning curve - better to have many guys tipping small - medium whenever they can (bread and butter) than just one whale you rely on x
    "If you want to earn more, learn more" ~ Zig Ziglar




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    God/dess Miss_ShaSha's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Oh how terrifying. I'm so sorry he was so drawn to you. It sounds like he's moving onto his next victim so that's a good thing. Good vibes your way girl. xoxo
    Sha

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    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Thank you both! I've been taking the time to work on some photosets, videos, grabbed some new equipment to work with, just totally working on building my image again (the right way.) I'll be back at it at full swing soon. In a way, I'm devasted starting over - but in another way, I have a fresh slate and I've informed the awesome regs I have about the switch. At least I have a little momentum going forward, but it's still a nerve-wrecking change.

    I mainly posted this for awareness more then anything - the "what could" "what might happen" scenarios when you let things go way too far (sad face lol)
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns

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    God/dess Miss_ShaSha's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    ^^Great way to rise above a situation! I have a feeling this new change will bring new money and healthier interactions.

    Thanks for sharing. It's good to be reminded of the what ifs so we can be prepared for them or avoid them altogether.
    Sha

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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Thanks sooooo much for posting your experiences. All new girls should be aware of the problems this kind of client brings with them.

    I try to put boundaries in place similar to how therapists, lawyers and social workers do. They would refuse a client/patient that took up most of their time for a long time. I think it's relatively healthy and expected that a client might get hyperfocused and need 'acute' attention for awhile, but when it starts draining you or affecting your mindset negatively, you've got to pump the brakes. I've had to totally ghost clients that took up too much of my mental energy, even if they paid well. Here's what I feel needs to be said; you absolutely WILL find clients and make money if you need to cut off a whale. It might take a few weeks, but you will get back on your feet.

    I hope he backs off for good, he sounds like a total creep and abuser.
    G-spot rocks the G-spot.

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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Wow, good for you, for being so strong and continuing to move forward with camming. This is the worst type of customer, they hook you with money, and they make you dependent on them. Of course, you don't see the extent of their mental health issues until you're already deeply involved.

    My only similar experiences have been at the strip club, not camming. I had all my bad experiences with stalkers and manipulators while working as a dancer, then I moved onto camming, and the block feature was like a gift from the heavens.

    You control the money. Never let it control you.

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    Veteran Member anoncamgirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    He sent you a christmas card? aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa what the FUCK that is so creepy. What a massive red flag.

    I am glad you're doing a bit better. This was such a scary read, and felt like a massive roller coaster ride.

    https://discord.gg/uj2YTKV <-- online chat group for camgirls, clipgirls, and strippers! (No men allowed.)

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    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Update:

    At this point I've received almost 50 emails from him, multiple MV messages, and even a fucking text message.
    The emails escalated worse and worse. In one, he writes a letter to himself pretending to be me, with "the words that should've been said." They turned into harassing emails, saying how he can ruin my life if he wanted to, and how he knows everything about me. He emailed me a youtube video of myself from a personal account. He told me that he was going to monetize the videos he made of me so he "can make some of his money back, since I can't talk to him."

    I know. I should probably go to law enforcement. Can you blame me for being somewhat scared of making this a real thing? I don't ever want to see this psychopath in person, and I might have to go to court over it (if it should escalate that far.) He said in one email he has nothing to lose (I doubt that, but he's nutso) What if this just becomes a slight obstacle in his way, and he actually pursues something way worse then harassing emails?

    F**k him.
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns

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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Oh goodness. I'm so sorry. He's so stubbornly persistent & certainly unstable. This man needs serious help. Your stomach must be in a horrible knot over this. I'd certainly speak to law enforcement about what you can do. Ugh! Praying for you, girl.
    Sha

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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    HOLY SHIT. This is a nightmare. Are you still engaging with him at all whatsoever? If so I would strongly suggest stopping completely - he could be fucking with you because he enjoys getting a rise out of you and/or because he is a garbage person who just likes to scare you. Perhaps if you start ignoring him completely he'll get bored and move onto someone else, which it sounds like he's doing with this other girl, god help her, but that's not your problem.

    I'm really sorry this is happening to you. I also second susie's suggestion that you should take a little break if possible and just refrain from anything having to do with cam for a couple weeks. Keep us updated. I don't blame you at all for not wanting to take it to the authorities but please be careful. Sending you good vibes and putting it out into the universe that this ends soon. Hang in there. <3

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    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    I have a sheriff coming over right at this very second.

    He's posting awful things all over my MV page.

    He emailed me tonight, threatening to dispute all of the googlepay transactions for $15,000 for "services unrendered" (because he...took recordings from privates, made them into clip form, and demanded I post it.) He also threatened to monetize my content again until the "debt is repaid." Excuse me? Debt?

    He also threatened to contact my family for my "mental health." He included my grandparents last name and my fathers last name. This was the final straw and why I am now involved with law enforcement.

    This IS a horror story. I want to kill myself sometimes. I find my thoughts in really dark places. I'm paranoid. I'm upset. This is what he wanted.
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns

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    Arrow Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Ugh.
    I have this one guy, he started asking & keeps asking to meet..
    We did a show or two, he tipped me (like 1.00 lol) a few X's..
    Every time I'd go on there he is..
    Last time he didn't tip me shit, but got off..
    next time, blocked!






    NOOO, NO, don't please, hate on ur self for some jack ass, PLEASE!

    Not your fault hon, it happens, I was w/a guy in real life, he stalked me, then nothing, but a few yrs laster he starts again, then a few more years, & same.
    TG he backed down when I called the cops


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Dude is probably just trying to get a rise out of you

    And yes he sounds like he has some sort of mental illness

    Try not to worry too much (ik easier said than done) and maybe contact a lawyer

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    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    I sent him one last email stating that he has zero permission to post my content for profit, and that if he contacts me or my family, it will result in legal action. That’s what the sheriff recommended. Next step is a cease and desist. If he breaches that as well, then there is a paper trail and the cops might be able to enforce it.

    In a way, camming helps because I feel productive (which helps depression)
    On the other hand, I feel like I have mini ptsd attacks (if that’s even a thing) when I log on.

    I’ve asked my fiancé to take over my old email and to check for more threatening messages. I also told him to change the password so I can’t be tempted to look. He said if anything comes up again, he’ll inform me, and if I ever ask to look, he’ll show me, but I think it might help.

    The cop believes they are empty threats and so does my fiancé, but I trust nobody. I think I did the right thing and I hope tomorrow I can wake up feeling better.
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns

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    Veteran Member MissAliss515xx's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    God that is a horrible story. Yeah don't let him get to you more than he does. He doesnt deserve this.

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  29. #17
    Senior Member starburst's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    i've taken the advice of stepping away from cam until thursday or friday.
    as tempted as I am to get back, repairing my mental health is more important.
    really hate missing out on $ opportunities, but at least I have a few months of bills saved up.
    doing everything in my power to just enjoy the time away instead of feeling unproductive and lazy.

    i appreciate all of the feedback <3.
    “Don’t stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.” – George Burns

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  31. #18
    Veteran Member MissAliss515xx's Avatar
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    Default Re: The Way Too Obsessed Customer

    Take care of yourself first girl and give us some news !!

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