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Thread: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

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    God/dess xxxGothBarbie's Avatar
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    Default This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    So for the last 20 years or so that I've been in this industry, I've always been a late sleeper during the day. I stay up really late sometimes like well into 5 am (even if I'm not working). Now that I work strictly online, not much has changed really except the fact that whenever I've stayed with family or friends, they all say in passing that I "sleep all day". It is NOT all day, the earliest I'm up & going is 1 or 2pm (depending on the time zone). Sometimes I honestly love just laying there waking up without coffee & it takes me awhile.

    Mostly is has been family that has said it in a passive aggressive tone that gets under my skin. I'm not asking them for money or help (nor have they even offered) so really what business is it of their's if I sleep into the day or not LOL???

    Have any of you in this industry experienced this yet? It's just super annoying to me! Ugh *eye roll*
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    God/dess miss.a.p1600's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    They probably assume you’re not doing shit and sleeping all day.

    Just remind them you appreciate their concerns but your work 2nd shift or what not and it is beneficial for you.

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I would hide it if you can. My family still gives me issues for being a night owl even though it's been years since I haven't been.
    I hate staying up late now.

    Are you staying with a family member ? If not, say you are busy with work projects 10a.m. - 2 p.m. or so so they have an " account " of your time.

    I hate judgement hahaha but lie at your own risk of course.

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by carmen_b View Post
    I would hide it if you can. My family still gives me issues for being a night owl even though it's been years since I haven't been.
    I hate staying up late now.

    Are you staying with a family member ? If not, say you are busy with work projects 10a.m. - 2 p.m. or so so they have an " account " of your time.

    I hate judgement hahaha but lie at your own risk of course.
    No I'm not staying with them & I only do so if i'm visiting for the holidays or something. I'm not gonna hide anything from them in regards to me being a night owl, I was just saying it is really annoying when people make note of it & comment about it, when it's really none of their dam business how late I sleep.

    I'll screen my calls & call them back on my own time clock LOL

    I just don't understand people sometimes, I mean if they know I work late, why shouldn't a person be entitled to sleep in thru the afternoon? Most people act like sleeping or resting during the day is a crime. Besides, there's less people out & about during my vampire hours haha win win for me.
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    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I also have/had this issue. My mom used to be appalled that I don't get up until the afternoon. I finally explained to her about how I work until 2 am because that's when the money is + time driving home + unwinding enough to sleep. I also did the math for her - if I get to bed at 4 am & wake up at 1 pm, that is still 9 hours of sleep and anywhere from 7-10 hours is pretty normal. "All day" would be 12+ hours.

    My FIL also tsks at both SO & I for it. Of course, he and his partner are typical old men, eating dinner at 5 pm But whenever we stay at their house, we both sleep like shit and get up way earlier because subconsciously we're trying to avoid hearing "Oh look who finally decided to get up!"

    I think it's just another thing that society has a status quo of, so anyone who is different gets looked at funny. It's stupid because there's science backing the idea that there are different chronotypes and some people function better on later/earlier time schedules. People get hung up on the fact that you're asleep when they're awake but they aren't taking into account that the opposite is true AND that you might be actually working or doing something productive vs just staying up & watching TV.

    I just turn my ringer on silent & have made it pretty plain to everyone that they are not to expect a returned message until after noon.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

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    God/dess xxxGothBarbie's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by Selina M View Post
    I also have/had this issue. My mom used to be appalled that I don't get up until the afternoon. I finally explained to her about how I work until 2 am because that's when the money is + time driving home + unwinding enough to sleep. I also did the math for her - if I get to bed at 4 am & wake up at 1 pm, that is still 9 hours of sleep and anywhere from 7-10 hours is pretty normal. "All day" would be 12+ hours.

    My FIL also tsks at both SO & I for it. Of course, he and his partner are typical old men, eating dinner at 5 pm But whenever we stay at their house, we both sleep like shit and get up way earlier because subconsciously we're trying to avoid hearing "Oh look who finally decided to get up!"

    I think it's just another thing that society has a status quo of, so anyone who is different gets looked at funny. It's stupid because there's science backing the idea that there are different chronotypes and some people function better on later/earlier time schedules. People get hung up on the fact that you're asleep when they're awake but they aren't taking into account that the opposite is true AND that you might be actually working or doing something productive vs just staying up & watching TV.

    I just turn my ringer on silent & have made it pretty plain to everyone that they are not to expect a returned message until after noon.
    Preach girl ♡ I've never been a day person really, I def avoid everyone. Even when I was in search of rooms on Craigslist, id see most ppl want outside employment 9 -five crap. Bleh!
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by Selina M View Post

    People get hung up on the fact that you're asleep when they're awake but they aren't taking into account that the opposite is true AND that you might be actually working or doing something productive vs just staying up & watching TV.
    This.

    I'm now in bed "earlier" than I used to be, but that still means usually between 1-3am. Sometimes I'm up at a "normal" hour, but sleeping until 10 or later isn't uncommon. I used to sleep until 1 or 2pm, but I also didn't get to bed until 6-7am... People really did not "GET" that I was going to bed as they were getting up after a full night of sleep.

    I still get crap from people when I try to make plans on a day off, and I tell them I don't want to do anything before noon. "Well, I'll be up at 6." Good for you. I don't get home from work until after midnight. When I worked full-on night shift, people thought nothing of asking me to meet them at 4pm, because to them, it was after a long and productive day and the rest of the evening was theirs to do whatever with. To me, it meant getting up, getting dressed, and literally sacrificing the entirety of my day to them and returning home too late to run errands or do much productive because now everything is closed and everyone is asleep. Yet, friends couldn't understand why I wouldn't want to make plans like that every day I had off... For me, a "normal" socialization time was 10pm, but everyone would agree that it would be ridiculous of me to ask people who had to be up early to do something like that - but no one thinks the same is true for night owls when someone asks for an 8am coffee meeting like it's NBD for us to get up and function off of 2 hours of sleep.

    I receive similar shade from people when I tell them I don't have to be into work until noon. "Oh, must be nice." Yeah, well, it's a 12-hour shift and I won't be home until after midnight... It's as though people assume the whole world runs on the same 9-5 schedule as them, so they automatically think that starting work later means shorter work hours, rather than just working well past the time that they're home, eating dinner, and relaxing with family or friends. Or think that "sleeping in" means you're getting 12-14 hours of sleep, rather than you're just getting the same amount of daily sleep as them, just at different hours.

    In fact, even when getting up later in the day, I often was living off of less sleep than is ideal, purely for the social aspect of feeling like I wasn't allowed to sleep any later or HAD to get somewhere at a certain time that catered to normal schedules. Daywalkers get so butthurt when everything doesn't cater to their preferred schedule, including when they want to talk to or make plans with a night owl; but they'd be flabbergasted if you ever suggested messing up their own schedule to meet a night owl's preferences, they way they expect us to.
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Also, the reverse "abnormal" sleep/wake schedule also caused me problems for awhile. I used to have to wake up at 1:30am to commute and start work at 4am. People, including my bf at the time, really could not handle the fact that staying up past 8pm was literally not doable for me, and that I often tried to lie down at 6 or 7pm when the sun was still up and people were starting to get off work and socialize. Even on my days off, I couldn't do it, because it would cause too many problems trying to fall asleep early enough when I had to get back to work. And it would cause SO much butthurt in people that maintained that I just didn't "care" enough to hang out with them or "power through" staying up for 24 hours straight for the sake of partying with them on their schedule...

    Honestly, that schedule was less relatable and sociable than even my night owl schedules lol
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    And it would cause SO much butthurt in people that maintained that I just didn't "care" enough to hang out with them or "power through" staying up for 24 hours straight for the sake of partying with them on their schedule...

    Honestly, that schedule was less relatable and sociable than even my night owl schedules lol
    Those would be the people to avoid.

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    God/dess xxxGothBarbie's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by Aurora_Sunset View Post
    This.

    I'm now in bed "earlier" than I used to be, but that still means usually between 1-3am. Sometimes I'm up at a "normal" hour, but sleeping until 10 or later isn't uncommon. I used to sleep until 1 or 2pm, but I also didn't get to bed until 6-7am... People really did not "GET" that I was going to bed as they were getting up after a full night of sleep.

    I still get crap from people when I try to make plans on a day off, and I tell them I don't want to do anything before noon. "Well, I'll be up at 6." Good for you. I don't get home from work until after midnight. When I worked full-on night shift, people thought nothing of asking me to meet them at 4pm, because to them, it was after a long and productive day and the rest of the evening was theirs to do whatever with. To me, it meant getting up, getting dressed, and literally sacrificing the entirety of my day to them and returning home too late to run errands or do much productive because now everything is closed and everyone is asleep. Yet, friends couldn't understand why I wouldn't want to make plans like that every day I had off... For me, a "normal" socialization time was 10pm, but everyone would agree that it would be ridiculous of me to ask people who had to be up early to do something like that - but no one thinks the same is true for night owls when someone asks for an 8am coffee meeting like it's NBD for us to get up and function off of 2 hours of sleep.

    I receive similar shade from people when I tell them I don't have to be into work until noon. "Oh, must be nice." Yeah, well, it's a 12-hour shift and I won't be home until after midnight... It's as though people assume the whole world runs on the same 9-5 schedule as them, so they automatically think that starting work later means shorter work hours, rather than just working well past the time that they're home, eating dinner, and relaxing with family or friends. Or think that "sleeping in" means you're getting 12-14 hours of sleep, rather than you're just getting the same amount of daily sleep as them, just at different hours.

    In fact, even when getting up later in the day, I often was living off of less sleep than is ideal, purely for the social aspect of feeling like I wasn't allowed to sleep any later or HAD to get somewhere at a certain time that catered to normal schedules. Daywalkers get so butthurt when everything doesn't cater to their preferred schedule, including when they want to talk to or make plans with a night owl; but they'd be flabbergasted if you ever suggested messing up their own schedule to meet a night owl's preferences, they way they expect us to.
    I'm so glad I'm not alone in my complaint I'm loving all of these replies. Day people def can be super selfish! Making noise & not caring if they are bothering others that happened to be sleeping (whether they were working or not the night before). I try not to really befriend day people anymore for a reason LOL.

    I find it amusing at times though when someone tries to make plans with me & I say how about 6 pm & they kind of scoff like huh?
    Last edited by xxxGothBarbie; 08-31-2019 at 08:55 PM.
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    Veteran Member StellaRose's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    ^ What’s wrong with 6pm? That’s happy hour in lots of places. Sheesh

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    God/dess xxxGothBarbie's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    ^ hahaha exactly! It's my happy hour.
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I feel shame about my sleeping habits. Depending on where I work and until how late, it usually takes me 3 or so hours to wind down. I'm always astounded when someone from work seems to understand how late we sleep, always feel like they find out a big, unflattering secret about me. I do sleep until at least 1pm, sometimes much much later. If I'm working until 4, 5 or 6am, I sometimes can't sleep until 9am or later.

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I get where you're coming from but shrugs I would've just said in a amusing yet slightly bitchy tone....yea because I'm up all night working or yeah because everyone works or follows the same schedule. I'm pretty sure they would've gotten the point after that. Alot of people feel like if you don't leave the house and work a 8-4/9-5 for these corporations that you aren't working a real job, aren't doing anything with your life, are a loser and or not contributing to society (whatever that means). Sometimes you have give passive aggressive people a taste of their own medicine.
    Last edited by Blovely; 09-05-2019 at 08:40 PM. Reason: corrections

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by Blovely View Post
    I get where you're coming from but shrugs I would've just said in a assuming yet slightly bitchy tone....yea because I'm up all night working or yeah because everyone works or follows the same schedule. I'm pretty sure they would've gotten the point after that. Alot of people feel like if you don't leave the house and work a 8-4/9-5 for these corporation that you aren't working a real job, doing anything with your life, are a loser and or not contributing to society (whatever that means). Sometimes you have give passive aggressive people a taste of their own medicine.
    I couldn't agree more In fact I love sleeping in then rubbing their face in it. It's kind of funny. I always just assumed that if these 8-5 people got to sleep in & keep the same job they totally would, they're just pissy bc they have to have a schedule. Schedules depress me, I dunno how THEY do it LOL.
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    Senior Member MysteryGirl44's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I'm also nocturnal. Tell people that you aren't "sleeping in" - you're just getting your normal 8 hours of sleep during a different time interval than most people.

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    God/dess xxxGothBarbie's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Im bumping this to see how the pandemic has affected anyone in regards to this topic. Im appalled at the few ppl that actually expect others to have the same daytime schedule they do during such crazy times.
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Omg why do they care so much?? You work at night, you sleep accordingly. Why do people have to insert themselves into things that don't concern them? Sorry you have to deal with this. Just do you and ignore them when they whine. Not everyone's lives are the same.
    [QUOTE=We had a rabbit like you;3051234]And I'm over here like "fuck you, pay me". No non sense, sorry.[/QUOTE

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I had this issue when I worked night shift at a hospital! Literally arrived home at 6 a.m. and had to unplug the phones (this was back when there were mainly landines - I'm not a young-un lol) to keep family and friends from bothering me and interrupting my damn sleep.

    Eventually I had to drop some people from my life and/or avoid them as much as possible. The nerve of some people and the inconsiderate assholes I deal with never cease to amaze me.



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    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I feel like all the "rules" went out the window for a while with the pandemic. Everyone that was furloughed was joking about sleeping all day, getting drunk in the morning, etc. It was a pain in the ass when all the stores and restaurants were closing early though, that disrupted my normal rhythm a bit.

    The whole thing of trying to force us nighttime people into daytime schedules has been an issue with me for a long time. I finally explained to my mom one day exactly what time a club closes, how long it takes to get home, to be ready for bed, etc. She got it and doesn't call until after noon unless it's urgent.

    My FIL used to get mad when neither of us answered the phone in the morning. He'd keep texting/calling until someone picked up and then it was "why the hell are you still asleep at 10 am, rah rah rah". We finally just stopped answering bc we got sick of being treated like irresponsible teenagers. We just call him back at our leisure.

    It kind of whittled down to where most of our friends are in the nightclub/restaurant industry. My other friends occasionally forget and try to schedule shit early but I've honestly just started saying "No that's not happening". We either find a middle time or change days. I'm not gonna drag myself out of bed with 4 hours of sleep.


    Anyway I don't see why it's anyone else's business. If we want to go to bed at 3 am, what skin off their nose is it? You're probably sleeping the same exact 8 hours that they are. They just forget that your daytime sleep hours are not on top of that 'normal' 8 hours... and that it goes in reverse... while you're awake and doing things, they're asleep.
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Yep i totes agree! I noticed my dad's side of the fam stopped calling me as much or any bc theyd usually do it when i was sleeping. Ive been living alone now in my own hotel room & sometimes dont want to sleep until 4 or 5 am which means im sleeping until late like around 3pm at times. It def none of anyones business what i choose to do. I thankfully havent been bothered by anyone in a while . its just more of an annoyance bc its almost as if ppl drop you for having a different schedule than them.
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I have horrible insomnia, so during the night this becomes my waking hours of when I feel most active. During the day I tend to feel like I should at night, which is tired and inclined to sleep.
    The issue with this is the groggy feeling I get when being woken up by those who are active during the day.
    There is also this negative assumption that people who sleep in during the day are lazy, compared to those that sleep at night.
    They assume that you must be unmotivated, unhealthy, lazy, ill or suffering from depression when there has been evidence throughout the years of this internal clock resetting itself.
    I did a test for a while, but I ended up reverting back to my usual insomnia.

    One month I stayed up at night and slept during the day, to which I had far more energy at night than in the day.
    I also was able to get a lot more done compared to the day, with the most energy, without feeling lethargic and tired.
    The next month I changed to the mornings and found that even when waking at 8am and going to bed at 11pm I still had little to no energy in the morning and slept till 12pm.
    Now I try to get up in the mornings, but regardless feel like shit compared to at nights. I still find myself laying in bed at 11pm, wide awake till the clock hits near 3am and I fall asleep. (Without electronics near)
    It is just how we are built, though I have been trying to change the cycle to daytime hours for years now unsuccessfully.
    Sometimes there is no choice, but to give into our natural sleep cycles, regardless of how fucked up it appears to others.

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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    Quote Originally Posted by BambiCutie View Post
    I have horrible insomnia, so during the night this becomes my waking hours of when I feel most active. During the day I tend to feel like I should at night, which is tired and inclined to sleep.
    The issue with this is the groggy feeling I get when being woken up by those who are active during the day.
    There is also this negative assumption that people who sleep in during the day are lazy, compared to those that sleep at night.
    They assume that you must be unmotivated, unhealthy, lazy, ill or suffering from depression when there has been evidence throughout the years of this internal clock resetting itself.
    I did a test for a while, but I ended up reverting back to my usual insomnia.

    One month I stayed up at night and slept during the day, to which I had far more energy at night than in the day.
    I also was able to get a lot more done compared to the day, with the most energy, without feeling lethargic and tired.
    The next month I changed to the mornings and found that even when waking at 8am and going to bed at 11pm I still had little to no energy in the morning and slept till 12pm.
    Now I try to get up in the mornings, but regardless feel like shit compared to at nights. I still find myself laying in bed at 11pm, wide awake till the clock hits near 3am and I fall asleep. (Without electronics near)
    It is just how we are built, though I have been trying to change the cycle to daytime hours for years now unsuccessfully.
    Sometimes there is no choice, but to give into our natural sleep cycles, regardless of how fucked up it appears to others.
    You just described me to a T lol. Im waaay more active at night than during the day. Unfortunately when i was staying with ppl to save on having to pay rent it was hard to do bc those folks saw me as lazy or simply "in their way" eyeroll.
    "Don't go mistaking paradise for a pair of long legs"

    "Respect is a dying art"

    "Philosophy is the talk on a cereal box"


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  43. #24
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    Default Re: This is more of a complaint but just wanted to see who has this same issue......

    I'm the same. I generally don't fall asleep until 3 or 4 am when I have to work the next day, and 4 or 5 am if I don't. People who stay up late tend to be more intelligent than people who go to bed early.

    https://www.lifehack.org/articles/pr...er-people.html

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