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Thread: Did I screw up?

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    Default Did I screw up?

    First post here, been a long time reader....

    So I typically go to the club twice a week as I have two entertainers that I love to take care of. When I go, I am by myself. Last Saturday, a friend of mine looked like he needed a night out, so I took him to the club. While there, I realized this may have been a mistake. He looked like a kid in a candy store. Not long after I arrived, one of my favorite entertainers stopped by our table and sat on my lap. I introduced her to my friend and he right off the bat asked if he could have a dance with her. She looked at me and asked if I would be jealous, I told her to "go make that money".

    When they were done, I asked if she had any time available for me. She said she always has time, but needed to freshen up. After waiting a half hour, I decided to leave.

    In the car, my friend was bragging how he was very handsy and even said "well I found out she doesn't like her kitty touched".

    I was kind of appalled! See I would like to consider myself a gentleman and the two entertainers that I spend time with, have gotten to know me to the point where we have conversations more often than dances (I tip them even though they say it is not needed).

    So my question is, did I screw up letting my friend get a dance from one of my favorites? If he was not a gentleman, how do I make this up to her?

    thanks in advance

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    You continue visiting her like you usually do and continue treating her like a gentleman you are, don't bring up the subject of her doing a dance for your friend. I don't see an issue here, she sees dozens of men a night and your friend was just another customer paying for a slot of her time, she knows how to handle handsy customers and probably won't even remember the episide.

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    I actually would appreciate it if you did bring it up, if I were her! There’s a chance he may have been a pain in the ass, and it will go a long way on your part to show understanding of that. No need to make a huge deal of it just say something like ‘hey my friend was respectful right’ and if she says no, apologize and move on with your night. It means a lot to me personally when men show understanding about that kind of stuff.

    Besides, if it turns out your friend is a creep to sex workers...you’d wanna know, right?

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    Quote Originally Posted by Adelina View Post
    You continue visiting her like you usually do and continue treating her like a gentleman you are, don't bring up the subject of her doing a dance for your friend. I don't see an issue here, she sees dozens of men a night and your friend was just another customer paying for a slot of her time, she knows how to handle handsy customers and probably won't even remember the episide.
    This 100% IMHO. She might actually be more put off by the fact that you and your pal were comparing notes about what she would do with each of you, or at least the fact that she has to hear about it from you.

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    thanks everyone. I went back to the club last night in hopes of at least buying her a back rub and making up for the situation without bringing it up. Unfortunately she wasn't there, so next time.

    In terms of comparing notes, as I had mentioned, I always go to the club by myself, so this was the first (and last) that I had brought a friend. I suppose the way I look at it now, I can only be responsible for myself, and I do not want to be associated with people that have no respect for entertainers. I would rather be looked at as someone the girls are happy showed up.

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    Quote Originally Posted by sugeree View Post
    thanks everyone. I went back to the club last night in hopes of at least buying her a back rub and making up for the situation without bringing it up. Unfortunately she wasn't there, so next time.

    In terms of comparing notes, as I had mentioned, I always go to the club by myself, so this was the first (and last) that I had brought a friend. I suppose the way I look at it now, I can only be responsible for myself, and I do not want to be associated with people that have no respect for entertainers. I would rather be looked at as someone the girls are happy showed up.
    Good for you she wasn't there. Now you can help the situation by not bringing up the post-dance conversation between you and your friend. Continue spending on her and treating her as a gentleman as usual

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    ^ Yep. Enjoy your time with her and leave your gross friends at home.

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    back when I worked in the club, I'd appreciate if my regular would say something like: sorry about my handsy friend...he doesn't know how to act since he doesn't get out much...i won't be bringing him back here...or something to that effect. Nothing that needs to take up more than a sentence and move on so it doesn't take over any future interactions.




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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    Quote Originally Posted by ggminx View Post
    back when I worked in the club, I'd appreciate if my regular would say something like: sorry about my handsy friend...he doesn't know how to act since he doesn't get out much...i won't be bringing him back here...or something to that effect. Nothing that needs to take up more than a sentence and move on so it doesn't take over any future interactions.
    But that would mean he would be telling the dancer that he and his friend discuss their post dance experiences with each other, which is not good. Imo

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    I had this experience when I did work in the club (over an 8 year period '99-07). If friends are sitting together and one is a regular of mine and sees how their friend is behaving, I'd be surprised if they didn't say something or apologize and would make it a point to let them know about their friend's behavior in a joking manner. If they didn't see anything because the dance took place in another part of the club (away from the eyes of my regular), then I would agree with you. Of course, all this is in our own opinions.

    Quote Originally Posted by Adelina View Post
    But that would mean he would be telling the dancer that he and his friend discuss their post dance experiences with each other, which is not good. Imo




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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    Had it been me, I would be a bit wary of you, as well. You may have been appalled, but she wasn’t there to see that. She has no way of knowing what prompted him to think that was okay, or whether you were any sort of catalyst for it. I don’t think it would be a bad idea to clear the air.
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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    I think you more screwed up by leaving and not following up with her. She seemed to give you nice comment as in " I always have time for you" didn't seem she was upset with your friend. Do you have her number to call or text?

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    Default Re: Did I screw up?

    I've been through this a couple of times. If one of my friends was offensive in some way, the dancers usually tell me. Even if they don't, if I find out that he was, I will apologize to the dancer for having brought the guy and not warning him off of the behavior. It hasn't damaged any relationships with the dancers, as far as I can tell, and even if it would have, I would still feel as a matter of conscience the need to apologize for instigating the problem.
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