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Thread: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

  1. #26
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Quote Originally Posted by ava$ View Post
    He does get our child whenever I need like if he wasnít there it would be so so much harder to do anything and he does most housework, we donít have it written on paper, I feel like Iím the only 1 working my brain or anything and I feel Iím a women who needs a man to guide her, I need help so wtf...
    talk to him about what you need from him, more guidance. get those financial goals down on paper. get communicating! i hope your situation gets better




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  3. #27
    Featured Member ava$'s Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    ^^thanks, he’s starting a business so well c how it goes but he’s not good with writing stuff down, he won’t do it and hates committing to financial goals cause he always ends up doing some dumb shit so idk I just feel at a loss for the effectiveness of communication with this idiot, hate to say it but it is what it is.. I’ve lost all faith but we’ll c

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  5. #28
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Quote Originally Posted by ava$ View Post
    He does get our child whenever I need like if he wasnít there it would be so so much harder to do anything and he does most housework, we donít have it written on paper, I feel like Iím the only 1 working my brain or anything and I feel Iím a women who needs a man to guide her, I need help so wtf...
    That sucks - I'm sorry to hear the pressure you're under. I've been the breadwinner for a lot of years now so I know that it's a lot of pressure all by itself. But add a young child, who invariably wants Mommy whenever you are available, and it's just a doubt punch. He may help a little, but it sounds like you're almost living like a single Mom already.

    As long as I'll live I'll never understand men who are ok living like this. I wonder where the male pride went in the current generation. But anyway...

    Idk Ava, but if I were you I'd start taking a hard look at what it actually costs you to feed, clothe and buy whatever shit he needs each week and see how much worse off you'd really be if you put the kid in daycare instead. If you're reported income is low enough, you can probably get state subsidies to help. 'Cause overall this guy sounds as useless as tits on a bull, as the old expression goes, and I seriously wonder how much better of you'd be if you lose the anchor.

    Anyway just my fwiw and good luck.

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  7. #29
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    he wants to start a business and doesn't like to write stuff down? that just sounds bad from the start. can't commit to financial goals? what does he think a business is? so many fail in the first 5 years...that's a much more serious commitment than writing down what you'd like to do with the money you earn over the next few years. i'm gobsmacked

    not being able to do something so basic is a deal breaker for me. how will your financial situation ever change if there isn't a plan? does he use GPS or doesn't believe in that either? how does he do his taxes? wtf...seriously

    it sounds much more costly to keep him, financially, mentally, emotionally, etc. not sure if it's as deal breaker for you, however it does seem to be manifesting in some depression-like feelings. i think you need to tell him you've lost all faith and tell him why. from his response, you can decide if it's worth working on or not. there are financial therapists out there. hopefully it only takes a session or two to get him to see that his lack of guidance may cost him his family

    Quote Originally Posted by ava$ View Post
    ^^thanks, heís starting a business so well c how it goes but heís not good with writing stuff down, he wonít do it and hates committing to financial goals cause he always ends up doing some dumb shit so idk I just feel at a loss for the effectiveness of communication with this idiot, hate to say it but it is what it is.. Iíve lost all faith but weíll c




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  9. #30
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Yea rick, this is BS, lol, I would rather do the daycare thing but now with the pandemic its not an option for me. I feel exactly like a single mom with a loser son, im really just in a place where im not even trying anymore just waiting for the moment I can comfortably get out and just say im done. He does all loser shit and i just dont say shit, I hide my $ and let him know of the bare minimum needed and just ignore him all together really i just care about my kids. Ill take them and well have a life..lol its really like this must be a joke... but nope...

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  11. #31
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Quote Originally Posted by rickdugan View Post

    As long as I'll live I'll never understand men who are ok living like this. I wonder where the male pride went in the current generation. But anyway...

    Anyway just my fwiw and good luck.
    a lot of guys have low self esteem nowadays bc so many women are working and say ok, I must be entitled to her income then. Like they still want to take control of the finances if they canít do it themselves they get forceful with the woman to do it or make her feel guilty...when heís the one who should feel like an ass for not being enough of a man.

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  13. #32
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    ^ My sister is in the same position as you. She's even kicked the daddy ex-boyfriend out of the house several times, but, he ends up back with her, because: (a) he has no place to go, and (b) she uses him as a babysitter to get out of the house on the weekends. Being a single mom is very tough. But, at least, by kicking him out of the house a few times, it has made him humble. He knows better than to ask for much. All he gets is food, shelter and shares the bed with her.
    Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.
    - Oscar Wilde

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  15. #33
    Veteran Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    I don't usually post in this section, BUT (And there's always a but)...

    ggminx: Drop this guy, move home, and find a Boyfriend that won't treat you like this. Seriously. It's YOUR body, not his. If you don't want to cam, don't cam. Fuck his passive/Aggressiveness.
    Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it

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  17. #34
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Quote Originally Posted by MissSophieXx View Post
    Hi Ladies i have been a long time lurker on here, i have cammed on and off over the years.when i met my boyfriend i was full time working in a ''normal job'' with a young a baby, since then we had a baby together.
    I decided to start camming again as his work went bust and we had a lot of outgoings and not enough money coming in.

    Now we have enough money coming in and we both have savings, i find that i dont like camming every single day unless i really need to which i dont.
    I put our kids to bed at 8 and sometimes i just want to chill out, i dread him asking the question every single night, are you going on cam or what? when i say no im tired he acts all disappointed saying were missing out on money now ect.

    I am so over it as much as i love camming im still a mom and i enjoy spending time with my family instead of being upstairs on my own all day working.

    Because its nearly that time of the month for my period he tries to push me even more because he knows i will have a good three days off.

    I dont know how to feel about all this its making me miserable.

    x
    Did you decide on a solution?
    ED Eí SUBITO SERA

    Ognuno sta solo sul cuor della terra
    trafitto da un raggio di sole:
    ed Ť subito sera

    --Salvatore Quasimodo--

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  19. #35
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    I don't usually post in this section, BUT (And there's always a but)...

    ggminx: Drop this guy, move home, and find a Boyfriend that won't treat you like this. Seriously. It's YOUR body, not his. If you don't want to cam, don't cam. Fuck his passive/Aggressiveness.
    i think it's MissSophieXX's and ava$'s boyfriends/baby daddies that need to get dropped. no one should ever be on cam when they don't want to. it's awful. i hope both can get their lives into better situations. being with a loser is the fucking worst. just drags you the fuck down like crabs in a bucket. my ex couldn't even help pay for a penny of our divorce so his assistance was to not create any delays in signing/delivering all those documents!

    i'm happy to say my current partner is still freelancing and earning, even though he's getting paid way less for the same work during the pandemic...and picking up 90% of the household duties. been pulling out some bomb ass meals from the kitchen too!

    edited to add:
    when i saw how my ex was managing the financial path of our lives, i was young and dumb and supported him. i thought he would grow and change. as the years went buy, i saw how delusional and narcissistic he was...and it showed in all the business failings. towards the end, getting the financial plans down was the way to expose what a piece of shit he was and for him to fully understand why we were splitting without putting up a fight...even though there were lots of fights in between!
    Last edited by ggminx; Yesterday at 07:15 AM. Reason: brainfart




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  21. #36
    Veteran Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Sorry ggminx, i was actually responding to MissSophieXx, For some reason i thought it was you that was OP, but i guess it works for you as well. No woman should stay with a loser.

    Anyway, let me just say the same thing to her, if you don't mind...

    MissSophieXx: Drop this guy, move home, and find a Boyfriend that won't treat you like this. Seriously. It's YOUR body, not his. If you don't want to cam, don't cam. Fuck his passive/Aggressiveness.
    Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it

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  23. #37
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Sometimes, unfortunately, you have to downplay your career with certain types of men.

    If you tell a dude you make minimum wage etc he’ll be way less likely to try to mooch off you.

    If I were you, I’d Tell him I’m declaring bankruptcy and going on welfare......

  24. #38
    Veteran Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    Or better yet, just don't date a guy who will mooch off you.

    Several years ago i allowed this one dude to live with me. This guy had to pay a LOT of child support (I guess he had a shitty lawyer, or something). I told him he could stay with me for a LITTLE WHILE until he got back on his feet. But he had to pay so much Child Support that he only made like 250$ a week (And the Government had to TAKE the Child Support from him, he would never have willingly paid it i came to learn). Eventually, i got sick of his bullshit and i told him to leave. He was always asking for money, I'm not his fucking dad. Not only that, the stupid motherfucker hit on my Girlfriend. I don't have to pay for him. Had to dig this guy out like a TICK. He just wouldn't fucking leave! But i got him gone. Had to drag him out by his hair. Total moocher.
    Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it

  25. #39
    Veteran Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriend disapointed in me when i dont want to cam?

    I mean, look, you can date a dude that doesn't have much money but is trying. Or some guy that has become unemployed (These dudes are really depressed, trust me I've been there), but they're trying. That's all fine, as long as they are trying. But someone that wants YOU to work while they play Video Games, is OUT of the question.
    Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it

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