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Thread: sex vs. money

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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default sex vs. money

    All dancers are in it for the money, goes without saying. How many get off on it? Not excited, happy, wet, but actually orgasm from lappies?

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    Default Re: sex vs. money



    That literally never happens. We don't get "excited" or "wet." If we are "happy," we're happy because we are making money.

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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    So what do I make of my dancer gf who won't limit herself to customer-hands-off lappies because she gets "excited" when they touch her, even though we're monogamous?

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    Featured Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Dude, for them it's like rubbing on the arm of a couch. They don't get off on it unless it's Vin Diesel or someone. It's usually all an act.
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by mellowmutt View Post
    So what do I make of my dancer gf who won't limit herself to customer-hands-off lappies because she gets "excited" when they touch her, even though we're monogamous?
    I guess a very tiny percentage of dancers who are not really serious about the job could just be trying it out for some exhibitionist reason, so this could be your gf. If you have an issue with her liking when other men touch her, then tell her you're not comfortable with that, and either come to a compromise with her or break up.

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    Featured Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Dancers occasionally do date Customers. It does happen, they are Women after all, sometime there are sparks if they meet the right guy. But in a ten year career, she might do it twice. Lightning has to strike you. You better be the most charming guy in the world. Better off meeting a Dancer at the mall or something. Just look for the Girl wearing sweatpants with REALLY comfy shoes on, ponytail, no make-up.
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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Dancers occasionally do date Customers. It does happen, they are Women after all, sometime there are sparks if they meet the right guy. But in a ten year career, she might do it twice. Lightning has to strike you. You better be the most charming guy in the world. Better off meeting a Dancer at the mall or something. Just look for the Girl wearing sweatpants with REALLY comfy shoes on, ponytail, no make-up.
    You have me all wrong. I haven't been to a strip club in 20 years. I Sugar Daddy, nothing on the profile about dancing, so they do come to me. Prolly cuz I *am* the most charming guy in the world, lol!

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    Featured Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Yeah, somehow I doubt that. It's pretty lame to brag about being a Sugar Daddy. Wouldn't you rather be Husband and Father? Rather than PAY some Girl to be your Girlfriend?

    Look, dude, i really don't have a problem with you, you haven't done anything to me at all. But (And there's always a 'But'), I just think it's stupid. I'd rather have more.
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Yeah, somehow I doubt that. It's pretty lame to brag about being a Sugar Daddy. Wouldn't you rather be Husband and Father? Rather than PAY some Girl to be your Girlfriend?
    It's a business transaction for some people. The woman wants stability and the man wants a young/hot woman by his side. I don't have the time to be a sugar baby. Heard one woman say that her sugar daddy decided not to pay her this month. Lol I don't have time for free services. Not worth it.

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    Featured Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Remember, they're not DANCERS, they are *WOMEN*. Treat them as such. They have entire lives that exist outside of the club. They don't grow them in a field out west. They don't live in the Strip Club. Value them as you would any other Woman.
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Just look for the Girl wearing sweatpants with REALLY comfy shoes on, ponytail, no make-up.
    LOLLLL i feel called out. How to spot a stripper in the wild. The only reason I ever dress up to go out is if I'm trying to freestyle or do some stripping-tangential shit.

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by indiegirl View Post
    It's a business transaction for some people. The woman wants stability and the man wants a young/hot woman by his side. I don't have the time to be a sugar baby. Heard one woman say that her sugar daddy decided not to pay her this month. Lol I don't have time for free services. Not worth it.
    indiegirl, I wouldn't. Not interested. And I've GOT money. No Sugar Daddy for me. I'd rather have a Girlfriend i don't have to pay for her to want me. I'd rather have a Girl that wants me on her own. I don't care if it's a Dancer, Nurse or a Librarian.
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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Yeah, somehow I doubt that. It's pretty lame to brag about being a Sugar Daddy. Wouldn't you rather be Husband and Father? Rather than PAY some Girl to be your Girlfriend?
    It was not my intent to brag, just pointing out lotsa dancers have sugar baby accounts, I'm not in the clubs looking for them. I was widowed twice over by age 32, now I'm 51 so it's been like, 20 years since I've fallen in love. I don't need to pay to have a girlfriend, but would it be fair of me to pretend the relationship might lead to romance and beyond? I pay the gals to not expect love and romance from me, but otherwise be my girlfriend, if that makes sense?

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Fair enough, but I'd still rather have more. But you do you.
    Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    I agree with AlluringDancer. It sounds like your girlfriend may be an exhibitionist but most dancers are not. We are there because we're making money and we couldn't care less about physical appearance of the customer. He could be George Clooney or Brad Pitt but if he's not spending on us, it doesn't matter how good looking he is. As far as your girlfriend goes, you either accept that she feels the need to seek attention and physical touch from other men or you can find someone else because people who seek out validation and attention from the opposite sex never change.

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    indiegirl, I wouldn't. Not interested. And I've GOT money. No Sugar Daddy for me. I'd rather have a Girlfriend i don't have to pay for her to want me. I'd rather have a Girl that wants me on her own. I don't care if it's a Dancer, Nurse or a Librarian.
    This is a business for most ladies who enter. It's not a way of dating, more of a fantasy experience. Perhaps you are looking in the wrong places for a relationship. It's supposed to be about fun/entertainment. Not match.com

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    Featured Member Raziel's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Oh, hey. I don't go into the strip club to find a date. You mistake me. I understand exactly what it is. Just want to make that clear. I'm not looking for a Dancer, I'm looking for a WOMAN. Dancers happen to be Women. I would have no problem dating a Dancer, what's wrong with them? If she wants to date me I'll share her life and I'll share mine too. But I'd do the same for a schoolteacher or anyone else. It's not that unusual. And I don't really care what profession that Woman is in. Just so we're clear. If she doesn't mind what I do, I don't mind what she does. But I don't go in there and hit on everybody, no. I'd probably be too shy.
    Last edited by Raziel; 11-10-2020 at 11:33 AM.
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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Fair enough, but I'd still rather have more. But you do you.
    Thanks! You do you too! Life doesn't always go as expected, all we can do is roll with it.

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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by WendiStarr View Post
    I agree with AlluringDancer. It sounds like your girlfriend may be an exhibitionist but most dancers are not. We are there because we're making money and we couldn't care less about physical appearance of the customer. He could be George Clooney or Brad Pitt but if he's not spending on us, it doesn't matter how good looking he is. As far as your girlfriend goes, you either accept that she feels the need to seek attention and physical touch from other men or you can find someone else because people who seek out validation and attention from the opposite sex never change.
    Ouch. I obviously know about her job, and approve of it, and can even accept the customer-hands-off lappies. That's my boundary, trying to understand her boundaries without being a jerk.

    Should I start a poll here, to see who thinks it's a reasonable boundary for a guy vs. get over it?

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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by indiegirl View Post
    This is a business for most ladies who enter. It's not a way of dating, more of a fantasy experience. Perhaps you are looking in the wrong places for a relationship. It's supposed to be about fun/entertainment. Not match.com
    I don't go to strip clubs. I have a Sugar Daddy profile. Almost all the gals I've met over the past several years have been a blast (let's not even discuss the two porn stars). But please don't suggest that's where I'm looking or what I'm looking for. I take the gals I get and am usually happier for the relationship, and they've mostly been long-term monogamous.

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    Senior Member mellowmutt's Avatar
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by Raziel View Post
    Oh, hey. I don't go into the strip club to find a date. You mistake me. I understand exactly what it is. Just want to make that clear. I'm not looking for a Dancer, I'm looking for a WOMAN. Dancers happen to be Women. I would have no problem dating a Dancer, what's wrong with them? If she wants to date me I'll share her life with her and I'll share mine too. But I'd do the same for a schoolteacher or anyone else. It's not that unusual. And I don't really care what profession that Woman is in. Just so we're clear. If she doesn't mind what I do, I don't mind what she does. But I don't go in there and hit on everybody, no. I'd probably be too shy.
    I'm always looking for a woman. I thought it would be OK here to say "dancer" instead of "stripper" so I apologize if my terminology isn't what you're looking for in a perfect guy, all I can do is try ya know? I've been dating dancers since I was 18, but until now they've always been open relationship f*** buddies, I actually care about this one or I wouldn't be trying so hard to understand her and where she's coming from. Again, my last time in a strip club was my last friend who got married (at least for the first time) and had a bachelor party.

    In general, I signed up here to have reasonable conversations with those I don't judge, so I'm surprised at being judged, so now I'm getting a bit defensive. There wouldn't be sex workers without customers, someoe please give me a prop for not being a douchebag about it? lol

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Well, i think i have demonstrated that I'm not judging you. I disagree with you, but if that's your play then play it. You should probably just call them Dancers, i don't think they really mind the word 'Stripper' but 'Dancer' is more respectful. If you care about this Woman, try to always be respectful of her. These are the Women that give us life! Respect that!

    You got a Mother, don't ya? Dr. Frankenstein didn't build you. Show her respect and you'll get smiles from her.
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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by mellowmutt View Post
    Ouch. I obviously know about her job, and approve of it, and can even accept the customer-hands-off lappies. That's my boundary, trying to understand her boundaries without being a jerk.

    Should I start a poll here, to see who thinks it's a reasonable boundary for a guy vs. get over it?
    Most clubs in 2020 allow some form of touching during the dances. It would be rare to find a completely no-contact club. If the touching violates your boundaries, you either have to accept the touching ("get over it" as you say), talk to her about compromising (maybe there is a different job she could do if you both agree on that), or don't date her anymore.

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by AlluringDancer View Post
    I guess a very tiny percentage of dancers who are not really serious about the job could just be trying it out for some exhibitionist reason, so this could be your gf. If you have an issue with her liking when other men touch her, then tell her you're not comfortable with that, and either come to a compromise with her or break up.
    She's been at it for several years, and I don't even want to know about the skeezy clubs she started in. We did discuss it and came to a compromise, but that had more to do with Covid-19 than the issue i raised in my OP, so it's still kind of out there because the world's all fucky.

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    Default Re: sex vs. money

    Quote Originally Posted by mellowmutt View Post
    I've been dating dancers since I was 18
    Yeah, not really a great sign. No offense.

    Usually if it's a guy that only dates Dancers, that's kind of a red flag. If she's smart, anyway.
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