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Thread: Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

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    Default Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

    Hello, I was a dancer for years and now do cam full time.
    I've been with my husband 10 years, hes the only person I've ever slept with and he with me.

    I recently found out he was really REALLY into the cucking fetish.
    Ive always knew, but then I used his laptop for something and long story short he was looking at cuck porn and beta porn for multiple hours every day.

    %99 of it is cucking shit. He literally only looks at "beta" porn, and husband degrading porn and more than anything else very descriptive and degrading captions. Most involving his wife but sometimes just females.

    Obviously, I have nothing against porn but the vast amount of it took me back. He had 3 different browsers (2 hidden) FULL of porn and he looks me up daily.
    I would make him content and he would watch that with the porn.
    Guys, I mean HOURS of him just reading cuck fantasy stuff, stuff about how badly he wants his wife to fuck someone else and wife stuff.

    I was even testing him and asked him if he would be okay with me meeting another guy of tinder to just hang out
    Here's were it escalates, there have been times in the past hes urged me to do things I didn't want to do with other guys.
    I'm not into it, I've only been with him and that's how I always though it would be.
    I had a really close male friend in my teens that I maybe got a little too firty with (in my late teens) while we were married and he pressured me to initiate dirty talk with this guy and send him pics. It ruined the friendship.
    He also has had me contact men from ads and send them pics and ask for pics... At the time i was reluctant but went along with it but now I look back and I realize how weird it is.

    Hes adamant its just a fantasy, but hes crossed lines before. . .
    Before I confronted him about the porn, I made a Tindr. Ive never done that before but I was already raging at him and so I made a tinder and showed him (trying to evoke jealousy) and show him how close he was to losing me. I even message a couple of guys... The next day I found out he saved the screenshots of me saying I messaged guys and was masturbating too it.
    I was crushed.
    Even now after weve fought over this, before he went to bed last night I told him i was done having sex with him because he was gross to me now and he said "oh, what are you going to do, how are you going to get it, wont you still need it" and I could tell he was trying to lead me into saying I would fuck someone else. He also looked up "hotwife tinder" and "wife fucks tinder date" for DAYS.

    Mostly, now he makes me feel like a creep from work(cam/club).
    Thats truly my problem here.

    I had him elevated so far above them in my head and I'm having a hard time as seeing him as just another pervert but he clearly is.
    We had a big fight about it last night and it ended with makeup sex. During sex, right after the fight about his cuckolding addiction, he told me he was a beta not worthy of sex and he would find someone better.


    If i was to directly tell him I wanted to screw someone else, I know he would let me. That makes me sad and devastated for some reason. I could press this with my pinky and have it all cave in.
    My bestfriend called me "lucky", but I feel like im in shambles. Any feedback? He also holds cam over me now when I bring it up even though hes never expressed a problem with it. Like a "how dare you judge my porn habits when you do what you do" and its sad because I know he has some point. I calculated he looked at porn a average of 4 hours a day, everyday for the past month. Mon-Sun
    He also steals my phone when Im sleeping to check for new nudes, begs for them, and compulsively checks my cam sites/looks my cam name up (atleast 60 times this month).

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

    Your husband has a porn addiction. Idk personally I think I would go stay with family for a month or something and think about what to do next...addicts can change but only if they want to and even then it's not an easy road for the spouse. I'm sorry sis.

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    Default Re: Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

    idk know what to say, if that turns him on, it will always turn him on, therapy or no therapy. i don't think i could be with someone knowing in the back of their head they have those fantasies. i would drive myself mad thinking about it everytime we had sex and i would just see him as one of those creeps off cam.

    i know its a really difficult place to be, cause you have been together so long, but if you know you can't deal with this, you need to walk away, you'll only regret it in 5,10,15 years time down the line.

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    Default Re: Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

    Try marital counseling, seriously.

    I had to leave a partner due to his porn addiction and it was a weird experience. It wasn't until years afterwards I realized his porn addiction was just a glaring symptom of his other, more self-destructive urges.

    If you two cannot reach a happy medium compromise then you have to part ways.

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    Default Re: Cam/club pervs bled into real life (husband)

    If you were to cheat on him, he would totally use it against you in a divorce. He already weaponizes your camming against you. Which means he does not fight fair. While it maybe his fantasy, it actually coming true might trigger him to become violent. In a court room, no matter how perverted he is, the judge will be more harsh on you for being a stripper & cam girl. We are judged more so than the worst of men.

    Your fantasy is "he is my one & only" but you don't discuss other important aspects of a relationship. Like finances, is there tons of debt? Does he pull his weight financially? Is the house work & shopping shared equally or does it all fall upon you?

    The more degrading it is to the wife the more he likes it plus the gaslighting shows a deep hatred or resentment towards you. Which does disturb me and makes me wonder why you would want to stay married to someone who clearly does NOT have your best interest at heart. Why would you want to stay in a toxic relationship? Just so your story of he is my one & only badge makes you what? superior over other women? Clearly, it is not apart of his love language.

    You have to look at ya'll disconnect as a couple at long term goals. You giving him what he wants, his fantasy will only make both of you miserable. And why would you sacrifice yourself for him?

    This response may make you mad, but you have ignored some major red flags in service of that "he is my one & only" storyline. You testing boundaries & joining a hook up site & such will be used against you in a divorce. Playing those games is playing with fire. You secretly want him to say "no, don't cheat on me" and that isn't going to happen. And men can be devious, this could be all a set up to fuck your over financially in divorce.

    I doubt he will find professional help for his fantasy & become what you really want in a partner. But highly suggest you get help for your self esteem, your long term happiness & goals. Imagine life without a snake in your life & how much better it would be.
    Video blogs on Camming industry & how to succeed at camming.

    Personality is the glitter that sends your little gleam across the footlights and the orchestra pit into that big black space where the audience is. Mae West

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