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Thread: Safety Tips for Dancers

  1. #1
    Sep 2018
    Thanked 105 Times in 42 Posts

    Default Safety Tips for Dancers

    Hello I am not sure if a thread exists for safety tips applicable to 2022 for dancers and other adult industry entertainers.

    1. Do not give name to customers, age, family lineage or town that you are from, live in or moving to, to customers or any other information that could possibly identify you. Family lineage and websites such as provides way too much information that is nobody else’s business especially not the business of potential stalkers. Get a texting app or second phone line where your personal information is inaccessible. Do not share what forums you frequent to costumers, as it gives some obsessive men an opportunity to lurk a website to gain personal information about you. Due to some strip clubs layouts, Some club customers lurk around the block or wait for the Ubers and taxis in the same place as dancers. You can change your first name in the Uber app so when uber drivers call out for you, they can find you. Names typical of both genders does well to avoid confusion.

    A scenario: there are only a certain amount of dancers working in your state at the clubs available. If an obsessed customer knows that you’ve moved to another state, they can locate your club as there are far less clubs than people in each state. Cyber stalking is a thing of the now and our personal information is more accessible than ever from court records to perhaps speeding tickets of where you’ve moved to. I am not making this thread to spread fear, but to address the issue of stalking in the entertainment and adult industry. If anyone else has tips to protect personal information about that baby strippers may need that would appreciated in this thread.

    I understand the argument some dancers have made in the past regarding “oh I don’t need to lie or pretend to be somebody else,” or “I’m real,” however a matter of safety has nothing to do with being “real”. Personal information is a big deal and the most serious stalkers can make up that you are there ex girlfriend who “stole money”(aka gave you money) and “cheated,” with other men and hire a PI.

    I also understand that the best way to not give personal information to a potential stalker is to not share any real information ever. This is easier said than done when you’ve developed an obsessed regular. My advice in this situation is to keep your story that avoids personal details the same.

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  3. #2
    God/dess Selina M's Avatar
    Jan 2013
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    Default Re: Safety Tips for Dancers

    All good advice! Just to add anything you didn't mention -

    - If you're concerned about appearing "real" to people, make yourself a fake real name, fake backstory, etc. and stick to it. That is who you are in the club. Make everything the opposite of what you actually do - Fake You lives on the opposite side of town as Real You, goes to a different school, doesn't have a day job for them to find you at, etc etc.

    - Don't show photos to customers on your phone. You never know what little detail they might file away in their head. Someone on Reddit illustrated this by taking someone's photo of their apartment exterior + the city they lived in and were able to quickly identify what apartment complex this person lived in, with just that little amount of info.

    - Some guys will actually try to find you, very aggressively. To illustrate this point - I once told a guy, on our first ITC meeting, that Selina *was* my real name and that during the day I worked at a club about 70 miles away. HE SHOWED UP THERE MULTIPLE TIMES IN THE NEXT TWO WEEKS, on top of either calling my club asking if I was in or coming there at night. When he did catch me ITC again, he was telling me how he spent an evening on Facebook looking up every Selina who lived on the entire east side of town and couldn't find me. I think he was harmless but the immediate obsession was lowkey terrifying and I had to have him 86'd.

    Do not underestimate some of these men!

    - When leaving, don't assume you're safe once you're in your car. Bloom is right about lurking customers... My club deadass had a guy hide in the shrubbery along the road and leap onto the hood of a dancer's Uber as it left the parking lot. Hopefully your bouncers hang out in the parking lot and watch as you drive off, not just until you're in the car. Better yet, hopefully the bouncers clear the lot of customers before letting the dancers leave.

    - Don't stop for gas or anything near the club, especially after closing or if you drive a more distinctive vehicle. If you do drive a boring car, don't put super identifying stickers or window decals on it. Be very aware of anyone leaving the parking lot after you, or cars staying behind you for extended periods. Know multiple routes to get home, switch them up, and know of some busier gas stations or other open businesses you could stop at for help if you suspect you're being followed.

    - Don't use your real name on social media if you're going to interact with anyone that could connect you to the club. Facebook/IG algorithms are really good at suggesting people's profiles. If you insist on participating in dancer-related social media, use at least a fake last name, or get a burner account.

    - Trust your instincts, please. No amount of money is worth you getting kidnapped or worse. The aforementioned obsessive guy, I was SO GLAD I listened to my Spidey Sense & lied to him. Another $500 would not have been worth him following me home or something.

    - Don't get too chummy with the girls in the club, unfortunately many would sell you down the river if it made them another buck, and that includes telling customers your personal info. I've seen lots of incidences of this, where Dancer A is mad at Dancer B so she goes to all Dancer B's regulars and tells them "She lies to you, she's married, she doesn't work at XYZ she works at ABC", etc.
    "People jack off with the left hand and point with the right."

    "You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave."

  4. #3
    Sep 2018
    Thanked 105 Times in 42 Posts

    Default Re: Safety Tips for Dancers

    Quote Originally Posted by Selina M View Post

    Do not underestimate some of these
    - Don't use your real name on social media if you're going to interact with anyone that could connect you to the club. Facebook/IG algorithms are really good at suggesting people's profiles. If you insist on participating in dancer-related social media, use at least a fake last name, or get a burner account.
    Thank you for bringing this up! This reminds me of a situation when I travelled to Vegas with another dancer. She had uploaded photos of us going out to the night clubs and tagged me which was cool. Then when we got back to our home club a customer at the club said “YOURE not bloom2018, you’re [bloom2018s Instagram name]”! Which is weird as fuck, since I don’t give out personal info to customers. Then later I found out that he stalked a waitress and the friend said “Oh he kept saying he would come in to see me at the club but I can’t remember what he looks like,” so she had been giving her personal Instagram account with her legal name out to customers who she did not know. thus giving out other dancers personal information as well. I assumed because she had her real info, her family etc. on there that why would she allow access to customers? But I was very wrong about that. The customer got 86’ed a few weeks later for blocking one of the waitresses from leaving her driveway, and this dancer still kept in contact with the guy!

    Another thing that came to mind while writing this is to cover up the VIN on a cars dashboard, since that can give away name/age/birth possibly address too.

    Another thing that comes to mind that helps protect personal information is putting an animal profile photo and a non-last name on Facebook or Instagram. This is more helpful when working in a small-medium sized city where you might pop on people suggested friends or run into people frequently or where if you go out, random people you’ve never met point you out and say ohhh that’s a dancer at ____.

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  6. #4
    God/dess tempest666's Avatar
    Sep 2008
    Hamburg, Pennsylvania
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    Default Re: Safety Tips for Dancers

    My enthusiasm for the second amendment is well known as is my husband’s temper and knife collection. We also have a pet alligator with a voracious appetite. I’m not worried.
    "Fake tits are like Kevlar. They don't guarantee your chances of survival but they sure as hell improve it."

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  8. #5
    God/dess SnuffleUffleGrass's Avatar
    Mar 2009
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    Default Re: Safety Tips for Dancers

    If you park your car anywhere near your club/bar, ask a bouncer to walk you out after your shift.

    One of my co-workers was followed 3 city blocks to her car by an obsessed regular. Luckily a bouncer saw the customer and followed HIM to make sure nothing bad happened.

    Also don't carpool with drug addicts. Just don't.

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  10. #6
    Oct 2018
    North Carolina
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    Default Re: Safety Tips for Dancers

    Pay attention to your mirrors, as well. One thing I noticed when I rode with L and she was driving was that she’d get a bit of tunnel vision. If someone had been following either of us, she wasn’t going to be the one to catch it. And of course the matter of, “if you think you’re being followed, make three turns in the same direction”. There was a time when we actually were being followed, and she wasn’t the one who caught it.

    As for how little things in photos can give you away, read the story about 4Chan and Shia LaBeouf’s “He Will Not Divide Us” flag. I hate to sound complimentary in any way towards anything to do with 4Chan, but what transpired really was quite impressive.
    Written on the walls at the house of sorrow
    You can find the names of those who burned
    Greater yet, the pain in little drawings
    I could not remain in that room

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