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Thread: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

  1. #1
    God/dess montythegeek's Avatar
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    Default Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    A few days ago PJ suggested (jokingly) a dancer name of "Godzilla Pinball Twinklebop". A large majority of stage names or not much more credible than that and few customers have "work names".

    Why are some people bothered by questions of "real name"?
    I suspect it is human nature to want to talk to a person. Do you think the majority of people who talked to Samuel Clemens called him "Mark" or Mr. Twain?

    I frankly do not care if dancers tell me their name is Mary or Jane--that is something I can deal with better than a lot of stage names.If a customer says his name is "Godzilla Pinball Twinklebop", what % of you are likely to ask what it really is?

    I realize a SC is fantasy land, but so is this place. How many of you have asked "sadbuttrue" to explain his handle. I have been asked about my name.

    Finally, the most likely trigger of the "real name" question is that the other party can't think of anything other to say to someone in the first 15 seconds of a conversation. It is a harmless time filler. You asked us our names, to get us talking, we ask your real name to get you talking?

    Anyone who pushes the question of a dancer is just rude and deserves no defense.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Dancers have stage names like actors used to have screen names. I guess it's a way to protect privacy.

    I've been to a lot of forums and chatted in chat rooms and it's rare for anyone on line to actually use their real name. I guess a lot has to do with anonymity. Some say and do a lot of things on line that they wouldn't do in the real world.

    Dancing is a fantasy and you are there to create an illusion so to speak. On line it's taken a step further I think. In chat rooms and forums I've seen some extremely outrageous names.

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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Alot of people have friends and family who dont know they dance so they dont want customers saying they know this dancer so -an- so that looks like th is and this is her real name. Being a dancer is usually a private thing and someones real name is none of your business.

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    Featured Member cash's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    for the same reason people on don't use their real name ....privacy.....why would you go and ask a girl what is her real name when she already told you what she is known by how would you like it if you come in the club and i ask whats your social security number i'm sure you dont give that out to everybody willingly do you .....well as dancers we meet lots of people every day some are psychos some are not ... and if our choice to give out our names if we trust to do so
    us: us: us: devil in disguise....

  5. #5
    alexislv
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I totally agree girls. Let's face it, there are alot of sickos in this world and a SC is a perfect place for someone to target a victim. If some weirdo got our first name and then followed us home or got our license plate # it wouldnt be hard to find out everything they wanted to know. I am totally paranoid about that...maybe its because I know 2 dancers that were stalked and killed by customers. So if a guy asks me after I have told him my stage name I have a backup name that I give that sounds real and I use it all the time so it doesnt sound fake when I say it...

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    To me, a smart dancer has three names.

    - Her "stage" name by which she is announced at the club.

    - Her "real" name which she tells no one who doesn't need to know it.

    - Her fake "real" name which she tells a customer to make him feel like he has knowledge of some inside secret.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

  7. #7
    alexislv
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Thanks Dr!!! I must be one of the smart ones...ive been doing that for years!!! heeheh

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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Like I have said in the past, I have no problem with dancers using stage names. But I will not deal with a dancer that has one of those stupid names like "Honey" "Baby" "Precious", or whatever! For me, that kills the fantasy totally. Use a normal name as a stage name, and the customer will not be turned off as much. Just my 2 cents!

  9. #9
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I figured in all my years of dancing (started at 21) i would use my real name, as i do on here. I have a chance of getting raped or murdered no matter what name i use in a club. They never knew my last name, and i am not listed in the book.

    I have used my real name club dancing, private parties, cam and upon meeting someone. However, i don't go into chat rooms, so there i probably would use my first name to.

    My first name won't get people far, as using a fake name won't either. It's that last name when you give it out in a club or chat you may have problems.

    I have used 2 other names when dancing, but wanted to keep my real name. OH and yes, even phone sex, i am Pamela.

    Pamela

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    Featured Member phillydj's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Privacy is one reason I agree, but there is a second. I always tell girls that want to use there real name not to because I feel that there stage persona should be a "character". I think the should use a stage name to seperate them from reality and the club world, because as was stated, its a fantasy and girls should be in "character". Ive also told girls to put makeup on(granted some didnt need it as were quite stuning naturaly) but thats what the club is there for ...the fantasy.. the glamour..and bieng what your not. As far as dumb as names go, I'm in agreement when you see a girl with a name like "Lucious" "koko" or " Beenie", you just cant buy it. One club I worked at the name HAD to sound real, and Im glad that someone(I assume as a customer) feels the same way.
    I Would Never Belong To Any Club That Would Have Me As A Member - Groucho Marx

  11. #11
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Fantasy it is! My real name using has not gotten me confused when i go out, i won't answer to "payton" for example. (stage name.) I do very well seperating my Working life and home life using my real name. I hear alot can't do that. I guess i was lucky!

    Pamela

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    Veteran Member Theresa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I become annoyed when men who come into the club ask what my "real" name is because I think that means they are trying to get involved in my "real" life. If I have gotten to know a guy and he has been coming in for a while, I don't mind as much if they ask. When I am introducing myself to a customer, I am telling them the name which I wish to be called by. Asking my for real name is more or less telling me that they don't respect that, and they want to know more information than I am willing to give. Maybe guys can't understand this because they are not in our position, but I think asking a dancer's real name is incredibly rude. If you are so concerned about finding out people's real names, try asking a Hell's Angel what his real name is and see how that goes over. (btw monty, this isn't directed towards you, just in general at the annoyance I feel at being asking my "real" name all night!)

  13. #13
    Featured Member Lilith's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Theresa saved me a lot of typing. I've already told the customer what he may call me. Demanding extra information which one knows is usuaslly kept private is rude, especially within the first meeting.

    I can see your point, Monty, on the gals who dance by names like "Precious" or "Sweetcheeks" but I currently dance as "Lily" and still get demands for my real name. If the guy is being a dick about it then I'll lean in close, as if I'm telling a secret, and whisper "Nunya." When he asks what "Nunya" means, I'll tell him it means "Nunya damned business" and walk away. I am unamused by men who think to get their kicks by harassing dancers.

    If they ask as a knee-jerk reaction then I blow them off more politely, but I don't like being asked.
    He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

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    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    There are a number of Dancer things that are none of anyone’s business. These include S/O status, hometown, sexual orientation, phone numbers, where they hang out, and ... real names. Asking any of these questions really should get the kind of response Lilith gives. It's not our (the customer's) business, so the question should never be asked.

    It does seem like its sort of a triumph for some men to get a Dancer's real name out of her. I guess it might make them "The Man" with their friends that they "cracked" the dancer's barrier. Throwing a lot of money a dancer's way does not entitle them to divulge any personal information, yet it seems that men who want to crack the barrier will use this to justify (in their minds anyway) that they deserve to be told. You guys who use fake real names only are adding another layer of necessary protection.

    Most customers do not see the need for Dancers to protect themselves that way, because they can't, or are not inclined to, see the need from the dancer's perspective, sometimes because of the Fantasy aspect of a SC. A customer comes in, has a pleasant time with one or more dancers, sees all of them at least once on stage, enjoys himself, and goes home. If he is hooked, he will come back again in a week or two etc etc. All of this is from his own level, which unless he tries to get more out of the experience that he should, is right and proper. He may think that he is a good guy, the dancers liked him, and he is no threat to anyone. That may be right. He is no threat, so it’s only fair that the dancer does not think that they need to protect themselves from him.

    The dancer(s) he had a pleasant time with has a totally different perspective. They really do not know him from Adam, despite the time they shared. She also sees a lot of other guys that night, that week etc, He may have been a nice guy, but there are a lot of other customers that she interacts with, and more that may be eying her and never interact with. She needs as many levels as possible to protect her, because each person in the club on any night could be a potential threat. Since the consequences could be rape and death, it is always better to err on the side of caution. That’s why she needs to keep personal information from even the nicest guy she meets that night.

    As for weird names like "Obsession" and "Godzilla Pinball Twinklebop" (I’m still disappointed that didn’t win) that may be an attempt to enhance their exotic persona. The downside is that yes, morons will ask their real names because of it. Not that that is ever right, but its reality. If they do have such a stage name, a backup fake real name should be a necessity.

    It’s sad and a shame that they have to do such things, but it’s the world we live in, and ruing it won’t change it.

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    Senior Member kennedy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Man,,, I wish more men would read this site! Would make life SOOOOOOO much more pleasant...
    " If I can't be a good example, then I will just have to be a terrible warning."

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    Veteran Member Rayleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I can see your point, Monty, on the gals who dance by names like "Precious" or "Sweetcheeks" but I currently dance as "Lily" and still get demands for my real name. .
    She's right- I used normal names and still had guy after guy ask what my real name was-usually in the first 5 min

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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I usually use my real name because it is so unique and I like it very much. However, I hate the men that ask/demand to know my real name in a matter of minutes. Especially because many of these men also use fake names or nick names (never have figured out why). Usually, if they pester me about it long enough and I've been giving them a fake name, I'll say "ok, my real name is Sara, but don't tell anyone". I just make up a real enough sounding name. They think they've conquered me, I keep my privacy. Everyone here is certainly right by saying that our personal information is no customer's business. Knowing these things does not affect the quality of the dance we will give them.

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    Featured Member Veronika's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    My real real first name is French and really unusual. I've never heard of another soul with it. Regardless of having moved away for years, I was actually born in the area where I now dance and soooo many people know me or would remember me if they heard my real name. Anyway, when I first started dancing I used my baptismal name which really is Veronica. I always was asked if it was my real name. Strangely, people would accept *any* other name I gave them as my "real" name. I mean.. *reeeealllly* weird things. Um, except on the rare occasion I tell them my real French name (just to see what they say). I've never once had a guy believe it's my real name. (I dance to Nico now which I'll say is my dancer version of "Nicole" if asked).

    I would never dance to my real name. I need that demarcation between fantasy and reality.
    Currently dancing at the Men's Club of Reno, NV
    under the name of Veronica! I am a 2007 calendar girl for MCR, so message me if you want a calendar!

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    Featured Member Lilith's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Add me as another dancer with a very uncommon real name. Now, no biggie if my name was Jennifer or Sara (or Pamela *wink*)... there are tons of women by those names. Women named that are still relatively anonymous. I'm not.
    He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Again whats the fuss about we love wrestling and implants we know they are fake so what's the big deal about fake names? So dancers use them so does everyone on this site. My name is not Big Daddy. Shocker huh?
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

  21. #21
    Veteran Member Santos's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    When he asks what "Nunya" means, I'll tell him it means "Nunya damned business" and walk away
    That's funny.

    Use a stage name. Too many weirdos out there and it's just one more layer of protection. It too dangerous to take a chance.

    But I do agree with Monty. Some of the stage names are down right silly--it really kills the mood IMO.

    Maybe customers should use a fake "customer name"

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    Featured Member cash's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?


    That's funny.

    Use a stage name. Too many weirdos out there and it's just one more layer of protection. It too dangerous to take a chance.

    But I do agree with Monty. Some of the stage names are down right silly--it really kills the mood IMO.

    Maybe customers should use a fake "customer name"
    ITA....thay extacy and henessy....sh*t doesn't cut it ...sometimes i wonder why would someone even think about calling themselves that .....just not sexy to me...
    us: us: us: devil in disguise....

  23. #23
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Sorry hun, (big_ daddy) not everyone uses a fake name here. My real name is Pamela, as i donated by check to this site, and it's all there!

    Pamela

  24. #24
    God/dess montythegeek's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    I know no one, well I think, no one is mad at me, and I would never suggest anyone give a last name to anyone in a club.

    I agree with Dr._Catfish that the three name strategy is best. I guess I never got annoyed by being asked what my real name was 30 times a night. I do personnally get annoyed at being asked 5 times what I do for a living since maybe one in 10 people have any inkling what it means when I tell them on any practical level.

    And I want to emphasize I totally agree that pressing the name issue with a dancer is rude behavior. That is why I like the second fake name idea.

    I guess that is the appeal of Godzilla Pinball Twinklebop--just say you can call me God!

  25. #25
    Veteran Member livenudegirlsunite's Avatar
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    Default Re: Half-hearted defense of Real Name ?

    Yes all dancers despise the question "So, what's your real name?". The reason that we hate this so much is because the guy asking does not have the decency to simply say "No thank you. I do not have enough money to buy a lap dance." A strip club is not a dating service!!! We don't care what name you as a customer choose to use in the strip club. Your personal business is none of our business and vice versa. We do not work for free. If a guy asks me this question in place of simply saying I don't have enough money to buy a lap dance; I tell him my bra size and that a lap dance costs $20.
    Most people prefer to believe their leaders are just and fair even in the face of evidence to the contrary, because once a citizen acknowledges that the government under which they live is lying and corrupt, the citizen has to choose what he or she will do about it. - M Rivero

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