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Thread: THINKING BUT SCARED

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    Member mia216's Avatar
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    Default THINKING BUT SCARED

    Hello everyone! i am new here and this is my first post i have been reading on here for a week and love it all, so much info. here is my question, i am 26 but look 22 at the most and would like to start dancing it is something i have always thought about and my husband we have been married 5 years supports me in every way but i am not sure if he can really handle it in the long run is anyone here married and what is your advise and any men what is your view point! My husbands quote is i know you are beautiful and you are mine and others can look but don't touch and he knows that guys will be grabbing me but he does not seem to get mad about it with me becoming a dancer. so any advise would surely help thanks

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    Featured Member MeganS's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    Hi Mia
    I'm married too, and my husband completely supports my line of work. He's familiar with the business and what can and does go on, but he realizes I can handle it and keep it strictly professional.
    If you're not quite sure if he really wants to support you in this matter, you have to sit down and have a talk with him. You have to understand each other and really agree. Do you both go to strip clubs together? That'd be an excellent way to ease into it for both of you! I'm sure he means it when he gives you his "blessing" (for lack of a better term).
    You also mention looking 22 at 26, which is great, but looking 26 at 26 is great too! You don't have to worry about such things, 26 is still quite young.

    Good Luck and Have Fun!
    "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you."
    Francoise Sagan

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    Senior Member destiny36's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    hi mia i am also 26 i have a birthday this month [happybday]and will be 27.iam married also going on six years.my husband is supportive of my job. trust is the key and keeping your job strictly professional.my husband goes with me to pick out outfits and shoes he is very helpful.i think you should give it a go. if he is not cool with it after you do it you can stop.
    WORK LIKE YOU DONT NEED MONEY
    LOVE LIKE YOU NEVER BEEN HURT
    DANCE LIKE NO ONE IS WATCHING

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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    I am married with 4 children..and I'm 32...I use 23 as my dancer age.. My husband is totally supportive..but your hubby has got to "learn" the business and accept it and leave it at that. You will no longer be a "regular" wife. A lot of guys can't handle it after it happens. He should look at the business side of it $$$$ and step outside of thinking like every other "man" out there. He should be proud you can dance and other men have to pay to look at you. Mine is. I do hope your hubby is not the type of guy to say "you should be a dancer"..to see if you actually will go out and do it..then take it as your cheating on him..You don't need head games


    Good Luck k

    Holiday


    "Some of the most wonderful people are the ones who don't fit into boxes." ....Tori Amos

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    My SO is very supportive and cool about it. He trusts me unconditionally and that is the most important aspect for it all. He knows that I lap dance for tons of guys, but I only have eyes for, and go home to, him. My advice is to buy an outfit and a pair of shoes and give it a shot. You'll know very quickly if this is something that you want to invest in...because you will see exactly how your hubby reacts to it. Some guys say that they are totally cool with it and then lose their cool when she actually becomes a dancer...

    Good luck...let us know how it goes!!!


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    Featured Member NikkiD's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    I'm 27 and my man is also supportive. If your husband is truly behind you, then whats the hold up? If he has any jealous tendencies, DON'T let him see you at work. While every man knows what goes on in a strip club, not all want to witness their SO in action.


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    Featured Member Corey's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    Hey Mia,

    I have been married for a little over five months but we have been together for almost four years. I have been dancing off and on since we first started dating. He is very, very cool with it. However, he has never seen me dance. I wouldn't be comfortable and he has no interest in SC's.

    He has his Jenna Jamison DVD's at home

    Cheers,

    Corey
    (Formerly known as 'Korina')

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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    I'll write this as basic as possible because it seems so complicated I wouldn't know how to start.
    A)I want to dance, I have thought about it for a year now and I can't push the thought of it away, I love exotic dancing and the primal urge for me to at least try is super strong.
    B) My boyfriend intellectually supports it, but emotionally would not be able to handle it. He gets depressed and drinks the closer I get to wanting to dance. I feel torn. I aboslutely love him, but the desire to dance is so strong. He is not normally depressed and is in no way manipulative. He is sweet and wants to let me do this, but his emotions don't agree with his mind.
    Does anyone relate to my feelings about dancing?
    Any ideas on how to reconcile my desires and his emotions? We are both very open minded, educated and sensual/sexual people.

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    Member mia216's Avatar
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    Default Re: THINKING BUT SCARED

    sounds like me me and my husband have been together for 6 years now married for 5 he is the same way does not drink though but i know on some level he is going to have problems with what i want to do. here is my therory
    overall you have to do what you feel in your heart i know i have to at least try because if i don't because of his feelings then i will resent him forever for not trusting me enough. i have never given him any reason to not trust me i have always stayed home and taken care of the house and our son but as a women and an induvidual i feel i need more out of life sure i can do other things i have a degree in interior decoracting but the need to dance has always been there even when i was younger but because of the taboo thing never went for it but in todays world there is a lot more girls doing this and having fun at it as long as you stay true to yourself. so if you need to talk to me more you can always pm me and we can chat so hope this helps and just be honest about your feelings to him and don't take any crap from anyone lol.
    mia216

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