So, I met someone before I started dancing and before he joined the military. I spent all summer moving around because I missed him and I needed to see new things to take my mind off. Of course absence made the heart grow fonder, but now that I have him, I just want to be alone. I keep thinking, I'm 22 and I want to travel and work when I want, not b/c it fits his schedule. I'm not even sexually attracted to him anymore, b/c he thinks I'm above him and can have whoever I want. His low self-esteem turns me off. He is supersweet and does not deserve this but I do not want to miss out on life. Also, we do med contact at work and I do not feel sexy when I'm at home. Dammit, I know what I need to do, but it is so hard to hurt someone, you know? We are engaged, which makes it harder, but he says he knew this was coming and wants to try to make it better. I'm spent and don't feel like trying at all. Sorry, just had to vent, I've been having panic attacks worrying about it and it is affecting work. I hate hurting other people...sigh...



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You are as sweet as you are beautiful and that is saying a lot.

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