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Thread: So now what?

  1. #1
    Senior Member smurfalicious's Avatar
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    Default So now what?

    Okay, now that I braved amatuer night and absolutely loved it, what do I do about my mother. I live at home because I'm going to school. Shut up, I moved out at 17 and managed to survive the bay area on my own for some time.

    My mom is pretty damn cool, all around. She knows I'm crazy as all get out, but smart enough to take care of myself. She's also good at letting me make my own mistakes.

    For the past few months when I started seriously toying with the idea of stripping, I kinda tried to feel her out. I'd say stuff like, "Mom, would you still love me if I was a stripper?" Yes Hill. "Hey, if I can't find a job a job I'm gonna start stripping." Okay, whatever.

    In all honesty I'm pretty certain she thought I'd never go through with it.

    Anyway, I think that if I explained my thoughts behind it, she'd be alright. The last thing I wanna do is hurt my momma. And of course if she's not okay with it I'll totally quit. I just can't lie worth a shit. I hate it, it makes me feel terrible. Especially to my mom.

    I dunno, would it be totally innapropriate to write her a letter or something? I'm the world's least confrontational person alive. I don't do this stuff well. I was thinking, if we talked about to kinda go into it really low-key, like, "Hey, you know how I said if I couldn't find a job I was gonna strip? Well..."

    The worst part is her girlfriend of 5 years would probably be the one to tell her it was bad, horrible, awful, etc. I dunno, my dad went to clubs all while they were married so they can't bother my mom too much.

    love and cookies
    -smurf
    You can't fight gravity, on a planet that insists, that love is like falling, and falling is like this...

  2. #2
    Senior Member Messi's Avatar
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    Default Re: So now what?

    Well good news! I live at home with my momma still too. She had a stroke and I was the only one that would take care of her! SHe never really wanted me to strip but after I tiold her the idea, she was up for it! She actually even said give me 10% and we will call it even. So my mom knows and is very cool with it. But the one thing is if I miss a day of school because I am tired or something she said she would kick me out! :o But more than likely she will be totally cool with it! The only person I am worried about is my sister finding out! So good luck!
    p.s. just tell her to her face you don't want to write it down. She will think your not able to do things on your own!
    "...it was a queer shaped little creature, and held it's arms in all directions,'just like a starfish'" (carrol)

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    Veteran Member NYCjacqueline's Avatar
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    Default Re: So now what?

    Smurfy, things in life are so much easier when it's all out in the open. Granted, my parents don't know about my stripping, but we live in totally different states, and I also have another job to legitimize things a bit. But if I lived in the same house, I'd have constant anxiety attacks over the stress of lying all the time!!
    Definitely tell your mom - and IMHO, do it the way you feel comfortable. Your mom knows you better than we all do, and she will understand if you want to write her a letter (especially if you've used this route in the past to confront her about something). I'm personally the same way -when something big comes out (like when I told the 'rents about my moving in with my bf), I wrote it to them in a letter, and then we confronted it face to face. It was a way for me to put down all my thoughts in an organized way - covering all of my reasons, etc, and a way for me not go off on a tangent - which I am want to do many times!

    Good luck, girlie - let us know how it goes!

    Jax
    "You have no idea what a long-legged gal can do without doing anything." -Claudette Colbert

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    Senior Member Mikimoto's Avatar
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    Default Re: So now what?

    Smurf,
    It sounds like you are in the same situation I was a few months ago. Back then, I really wanted to tell my parents and get the whole stripping thing off my chest. At first it was really hard and I ended up hinting to my dad about my new job as a waitress. Slowly I would add in details like where I worked and when I would get home. Finally he asked me point blank one day, "Does the place where you work have a pole in it?".

    I almost laughed right then, but decided to tell mom and dad that night what my real job was. At first they cried a little and tried to talk me out of it, but after an hour I found out that my dad used to visit Mitchell Brothers Theatre in SF, LOL. Anyway, everything worked out in the end, probably because my dad had gone to MBOT and also because my grandma supported me by saying she would have done it if they had strip clubs in her day.

    So give it a try and good luck!

    Kaiya (at the Lusty Lady in SF)

  5. #5
    Pamela
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    Default Re: So now what?

    Wow Smurf, me telling all of my family..Would have to say be honest. Writing a letter may not be the best way to approach the conversation. What you want is to be able to ask her questions, and her you. A letter may give her time to fester. Thinking about all the bad. You want to be right there to clear up any questions she may have now.
    Good luck on whatever path you take with your mom.
    Also your mom sounds pretty cool! I would not lie though.

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    Featured Member Chuck149's Avatar
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    Default Re: So now what?

    Note: I posted this reply under the psychology thread, but it may be an appropriate reply here as well.

    My son had been dating a girl for several months. One day at the Sunday dinner table, she announced that she was going to give stripping a try. My son was shocked, my wife was horrified. All I could do was smile, I must have had the biggest grin on my face, because my son and wife kinda gave me that "look".
    She was a beautiful girl and was trying to make it through college on her own. Her parents were dead ( killed in a car crash) and she lived with her aunt. Money was tight and she was desperate.
    I encouraged her to go for it (of course)
    My son finally came around and encouraged her as well. My wife never accepted it. She danced for six months before my son broke it off with her, he couldn't stand the thought of all the guys ogling her.
    I never went to see her dance because I didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable, but I bet she was great.
    I guess my point here is, don't be afraid to tell your family that your a stripper. If they love you, they will accept you as YOU.
    "when it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day" ~ Marty Bucella

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