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Thread: Should I change clubs?

  1. #1
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    Default Should I change clubs?

    Okay, this is going to sound really stupid, but I really need advice on what to do about my situation. The thing is, I have the BIGGEST crush on the manager of my club. I know it is a bad idea to get involved with someone who works with you in the club, so I am not pursuing anything with this guy, but we do flirt all the time and have a friendly relationship.
    So anyway, last night he told me he might start managing another club. He was offered the position but doesn't know whether he will take it or not. Anyway, I am SO upset now. He is the only reason I am working at the club I am at, and if he is not working there I will be really unhappy there.
    I could always switch to the club where he moves to, but I hear that business is kinda slow there and I would probably be making less money. (and I don't want to seem like a stalker).

    So what does my best option seem to be...stay put at my club (whether he moves or not), move to his club, or move to another one where he will not be, where i would probably be making more money.
    I am just so sad right now

  2. #2
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    You'll be much better off if you work at separate clubs! That way you can date him now with no fear of others' jealousy or accusations of unprofessional behavior.

    None of us are perfect and we are in an atmosphere where sexual temptation is always there, but giving into it almost always trouble!! After being stupid and paying the price, I have been very careful not to sleep with any of the dancers at the last two clubs I have worked at, unless they started working elsewhere, but the managers at both clubs got mad at me anyways for getting along so well with the dancers.

    Recently I gave one a ride home and stayed with her 'cuz she was scared of a wierdo, and even though she is really my type (!), I was very careful not to do anything, but the manager got pissed because she had turned him down before (he hits on all the girls) and what we did LOOKED bad. Jealousy is hard to fight!!

    Like the song says, you got to "keep 'em separated!"

    Djoser
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    Go to the other club where you will make more money. If you are truly interested in this guy, you can pursue that without having it interfere with both of your jobs and vice versa. You should NOT switch to a club where you will potentially make less money just because someone you have a crush on is working there - that is a bad move all around. Keep your work and personal lives separate, and if something does happen between you and this manager, the relationship will have a much better chance if you're not working together. Also, you don't want to deal with the problems of working with someone AFTER something happens if it doesn't work out.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  4. #4
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    Hi,
    i would stay at the club i am at, because you make more money there. And see him if you both want. I would only date him if he did not work at the same club however. Remember too, managers are friendly people (should be,) and he may be friendly with alot of dancers, and that could lead you to some jealousy issues. If you two can see each other outside work when/if he moves to the other club, you may avoid seeing activity that may make you otherwise feel jealous.
    He has a job to do, and that involves keeping dancers happy. Good luck to you both no matter what you chose to do. Pamela

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    Featured Member Devastating Divyne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    Say u worked for in an office for a company in the city, well what if ur boss, who is the greatest boss in the world, got transferred to the suburb office. Would u change jobs to be nearer to this boss, even if u knew u would have to take a significantly lower paying job? Probably not. Think about what u r doing and learn to differentiate. Crush and relationship are different. Start differentiating between the 2 right now.
    Here's a little scenario for you. At X club I had the best manager in the world, but the club is going down and girls are having sex in the VIP and my money is taking a dive. Do i stay at club X cuz I really love this manager, or do I tell this manager I'm going to work at Club Y b/c I can't stay there b/c of whats going on? And at club Y nobody getting banged and the money is good. Have U figured out what I did yet? I still go over there to club X in street clothes and kick shit and drink with my fav manager and my friends, but I doubt my platforms will ever touch that stage again until lots of changes occur.
    "Come what may although I often say realities come from dreams, but approach all lies with open eyes because NOthing in this world is EVER ALL it seems."

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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    Divyne- I'm the person you replied to about working in Columbia MO. Thanks for all your thoughts on that. I'm still considering, although I admittedly swing back and forth between "no" and "yes". You said clubs in Columbia were too close for your comfort level, so I'm guessing you're dancing around there some place. To help me eliminate some bad choices, could you tell me where the "good manager" is so I can avoid that? It would be just like me to get myself hired in the wrong place because I liked the manager. Thanks a lot.

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    Default Re: Should I change clubs?

    If you stay where you are while he moves to a different club, there is a distinct possibility that you'll find out that his flirtations will now be directed towards girls in the new club. If you change clubs, you may find out the very same thing BUT you'll also be taking a pay cut plus probably burning your bridges to your old club. Sounds like a lose-lose situation to me unless this manager is a very rare breed indeed and is seriously interested in you.

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