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Thread: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

  1. #1
    Member ib6ub9's Avatar
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    Default What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

    Well I am calling on you ladies to help me out here...guys too actually.

    I was up at a strip club this past SuperBowl Sunday, thinking that there would be nowhere better on the planet to enjoy the game than a strip club. Well there were like a total of 6-8 dancers at peak and they stayed in the main room whilst we sat and enjoyed the game with sound in a large side room. They didn't even come in! Anyway, not the point...sorry.

    At game's end me and my 2 pals leave and are chatting outside in front of our cars. As lateshift dancers start coming to work, I do what iss natural and pull a Linda Blair a la Exorcist and spin my head around once my hottie-radar goes off to check them out. Well, about the 3rd time this happens, I spin to my right and catch sight of this former female colleague of mine coming in to work. We are about 40 feet from the door, but she pauses and glances down after our eyes locked for a half second or so. I immediately turn my head back forward and resume discussions with my mates telling them not to check her out as I was about 80% certain that it was her and based on the avoidance move she pulled I figured she was embarassed to see me see her. It took her a longtime to come within my forward gaze...obviously she stopped and didn't know what to do (I am guessing)...and when she did finally enter my field of vision to go to the front door she literally canted her head to the right (I was back left of her) and walked to the entrance.

    So...here's the thing...my buddy used to date her but no more. I know her from work before she left. My buddy once told me that she worked as a door girl at a strip club but she never told me that and I don't think he told her that he told me that. So...me-thinks that she thinks that I have no knowledge of her ever being associated with a strip club and here she is entering one, most likely to dance. Now, I let today slip by thinking of what I should or shouldn't do. Based on her reaction I am not going to tell my buddy. But...do I need to seek her out and tell her that? I mean she is probably seriously weirded out and wondering about me and maybe will avoid going back to work again and I don't want to cause her financial harm, especially when I like her and have no qualms with a girl dancing even if they had/have corporate world jobs as well or used to. Hell if I could dance, I'd do it in a heartbeat. She unfortunately does not know that belief of mine though. Or should I just leave it be?

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    Is there some way you can contact her without being face to face? Like email, or maybe leaving a note for her at the club? That way, you can explain things to her without putting her under any pressure whatsoever. Then it is up to her to decide if she feels comfortable contacting you. The decision is her's as to whether she lets it drop or not.

  3. #3
    Pamela
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    Me being a dancer, she has to realize this is a very small world. Bumping into someone you know sooner or later is probably going to happen. Co-workers, ah yes, most know i dance. (another job i have.) Big deal. She is doing a job. And she said to your buddy that she was a door girl at a strip club. Maybe she just graduated to dancing! I don't think it's a big deal. If she is comfortable with her job, and she should be, or may not belong there. I would take my buddies and go one night. She saw you guys and you all saw her anyway at this point, entering the club. Don't call her over, or stare at her, that can be uncomfortable for a dancer who has "been caught" so to speak. Just go check out the scene one night. Say hey! If you don't make a big deal out of the situation, it should not become one. None of you are dating her now, so there realy should not be a problem for her. (my guess.) Your call of course. Pamela

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    Senior Member Jackjrct's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    The male side - I would go back and try to catch her when she enters the place, before she gets to the dressing room, etc and tell her you need 2 seconds of her time. Point Blank - that you lips are sealed, that you are not there to watch her dance and everything is cool.

    Happened to me once and that is the way I handled it. She burst out crying because she thought I would tell her former co-workers, that they would all show up one night, etc etc and she did start looking for another club.

    I usually call ahead to find out if she is there and avoid the place.

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    Member ib6ub9's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    A few more things...None of the guys I was with know her or my buddy that dated her. I am not 100% certain it is her in the first place, but my gut says it is. I do not have her e-mail and I would have to ask my buddy that dated her for it, so I don't want to do that. I do know the location/name of where she works her day job (non stripping) so I could call there. Or better yet, I could call the strip club in question. As far as leaving a note there, the club is about an hour away from me, so I go there rarely as it is and I only have that one data point in terms of what days she works there. But if you think I should to avoid the embarassment factor of face-to-face or verbal communication I will do it. Also when she told my buddy about the door girl thing that was just a tidbit from her past not her present or her future. Like I said, I don't want her to have to quit or look elsewhere...I could care less that she dances...actually I once joked with my buddy that she should right after she lost her job...would be a good way to make ends meet and then some.

    Maybe I need to confirm things to the 100% level first. Do you think the club would confirm to me over the phone that she works there if I gave her real full name? Or if I went there in person and spoke to a Staff member? And if not, would they if I relayed the story to them and my intent to let her know I won't hassle her about her working there?

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  6. #6
    Pamela
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    I really don't see the big deal. Go to the club one night and see if she's dancing. talk with her, hell buy a dance if you like. Do you like her and want to get to know her better, or just want to find out what she is doing with her life? Pamela

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    Member ib6ub9's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    We are acquaintances, not friends. I have no interest in her other than to alleviate concerns of a fellow human being...so that she may go on with her life and earn her living however she sees fit without worrying over seeing me around. That is all. Having said that I just wanted to see if anything on my part was warranted or not.

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  8. #8
    Pamela
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    That is up to you. How do you feel? You want to see her, and talk? Go for it. I don't see any harm do you? See how she feels about seeing you, it seems to be on your mind. Give it a go. Say hi. Ask how she has been. Good luck. Pamela

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    ib tell me where she works and what her stage name is i will go talk to her for you
    The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette
    a clear conscience is a sign of a bad memory

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    Member ib6ub9's Avatar
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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip cl

    Hey hey hey...I don't want you "talking" to her dude - lol! Seriously though, I don't know her stage name only her real name. The club in question is Splendor () NW side of Houston.

    I'll let y'all know what I do and what happens.

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

    Two and a half years late, here.

    If I ever see a girl I know dancing, and she knows me, I'll let her know that she can trust me to keep her secret.
    The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing. - Edmund Burke
    For rest and relaxation, I command a Panzerarmee Division.

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

    This girl probably didn't think more than a minute over running into this guy. Maybe it wasn't even her! We all have run into someone we know right? Would you have felt better if they told you the wouldn't tell anyone? They either will or they won't and there isn't much control over what they do.

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

    I have seen girls spot someone they know and literally RUN into the dressing room. I have even seen a girl hop off the stage and haul ass into the dressing room!

    If they didn't want attention drawn to themselves, then hauling ass like a wide receiver through the club is NOT the action to take.

    I think it is just a fact of life that sooner or later you will be recognized and that is just the way it is.

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    Default Re: What do I do? Saw female colleague at strip club.

    What would I do?
    One: I would be alot more understanding then I would have been four years ago.
    Two: Because this hapened to ATF and I helped her manuver around the club to avoid these guys on two occasions... I wouldn't say or do anything.

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