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Thread: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    First, my BF has been taking care of me and all the bills since I quit dancing when i first got fat.

    I lost some weight now and the money is tight here, so he has been complaining that I haven't been working.
    But he has not made it easy for me to continue my weighloss successfully because every couple of weeks he brings home not one- but two 1/2 gallons of ice cream to sit in the freezer.

    I am the kind of person who CANNOT have this shit near me or I cave in. Just like an alcoholic who is trying to stay sober, the first step is rid yourself of any people, places or things that reinforce the problem. Tonight he bought two ice creams AGAIN, when I worked hard this week and 'just' took off another couple of pounds. Why does he have to get two?? What is he trying to do, undermine my progress in a way??

    Usually I end up having ice cream with him- and then the next day he's complaining that I haven't worked. When i mean complain, i mean threatening my security by throwing me out and evicting himself out of this apartment since he says he cannot afford this cheap $725 rent!! (that's another rant) I have asked him nicley to not bring home any ice cream but he doesn't think it is fair to him that he can't have goodies in the freezer for himself.

    When he bought the ice creams tonight, I asked him why he got two. His answer was that he didn't know if i wanted to be 'bad' and he didn't want to go back out to get me some if i did want to be bad since he was having his ice cream.

    Now, he buys me all the 'diet food' i need, but he brings home ice cream a lot and i end up cheating because i cannot handle it in the house! I ask myself why he needs to bring home so much and it sits in the freezer!!

    I ask myself why he can't do me the favor and support me with my weightloss. Say he brings home ice cream for himself only, he will get a half gallon and he'll have only 1 bowl of it a night- but then it sits in the freezer and I cannot control myself around it sadly enough and he knows it! I've asked him to get a small Haggen Daaz or something so he could finish it up in one night, but he feels like that is not fair to him and wants to be comfortable in his own house and still brings home half gallons. (half gallons are cheaper; sometimes he brings home two half gallons only because you get the sale price when you buy two at a time!!)

    I'm not sure if I am wrong for asking him to cease buying it, but if i want to lose and work- this is what I need to do; not to have it anywhere near me. I don't know why he just HAS to buy ice cream and keep it in the house when he knows that i am trying to prepare myself for work.
    ~N

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Neptune, I have been in that situation. My man loves his ice cream and never gains a lb. At times when I really wanted to lose weight (mostly bikini pageants) I would ask him not to bring home the ice cream. Of coarse he doesn't understand that he would really be supporting me if he didn't bring it home, and he doesn't understand that I can't not eat it!

    Do you like sherbet? It is low in fat. You could eat that instead, or they have fat free ice cream treats. It doesn't taste as good at first, but after awhile it tastes normal. That is what I ended up doing.

    The part about him threatening to throw you out really scares me. Why would he throw you out if he loves you? I think he is being manipulative.

    You said you are down to 124 right? Why don't you start dancing again? That is a good weight. Don't do it because your boyfriend is telling you to. Do it for yourself, and so you don't have to rely on him in case he is serious about throwing you out.

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Thanks Kobi! This past week I made it down to a 26 waist, 20 inch thighs, 34 inch hips. I'm 124lbs at 5'2 so I'm going to need some toning.

    Sherbert is a great idea for cheating. Bill Philips- that weight trainer guy who has a book out writes that he has a cheat once a week to fool your body so it doesn't think it's starving and feed on the muscles. I really take pride in the way i look, believe me, almost obsessive. But sometimes I don't always succeed with my goals as I would like to.

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Yes, my BF says he makes 40k, not sure since he's given me different figures ranging from 40-50k. He tells me he got a raise but it's not in effect yet, so I don't know what the heck he's making. He pays out to a credit consolidation each month which is about $600, plus the usual phone/cable/internet and grocery shopping each week.

    He says he can't handle the $725 rent, and he doesn't even pay the full amount when paying the rent either!! Months ago when i was heavier, he tried to push me to work in a really shitty low-end fat club to make money. I am disturbed that he finds it necessary for me to work in a dirty club or a CVS. (Through the time that he requested me to get to work, he doesn't accept that i can't have certain foods in the house if I want to succeed)

    For months now, he has been shrieking at me to GET OUT!! Just two weeks ago, he actually tried to LITERALLY throw me out when it was freezing because we were squabbling about something. The neighbor had to pull him upstairs and tell him to take a look at what he was doing. It's not the first time he's 'literally' tried to get rid of me when we fight about things other than $.

    I have mixed feelings about him because he's taken care of me in many ways, but he's always on the verge of throwing me out or telling me that I have to go bye-bye so he can move to his mom's and save $. At the same time, he activley looks for cheap apartments or a mobile home (YUK!) to buy since real estate is at a low right now. He says he wants to cash out his IRA to buy property, but I've basically been an obligation. The only reason I don't wish move back w/parents is that they won't let me dance if i move back in with them.
    ~N

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    Featured Member MeganS's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Actually, there are some really tasty no sugar added or sugar free popsicles out there. Edy's brand is good, they definately help me out. My man is the same, bringing home junk when he knows I'll cave in and pig out. So from now on I do the shopping, and he doesn't go out of his way to buy any extras.
    "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you."
    Francoise Sagan

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Hey there, well soon I'll be doing ALL the shopping by myself, alone- considering he just is staying w/me because he "feels sorry for me." (his words exactly)

    Now my next quest is to find a room to stay or extremely small studio w/ 'exceedingly' less than perfect credit after I audition and begin to work regularly and save up. Let's just hope he's not gonna throw me out and get us evicted before i make the money on a downpayment for a place.
    That is my concern right now.
    ~N

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    i don't know why my sentence came up RED!!

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    Senior Member tranquil_waters's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    My hubby does most of the food shopping. We have so much junk food around. I just don't care, I wont eat it, I convinced myself it taste nasty Go to a GNC store and read the lable for Exenadrine EFX If you can take it then I suggest it. I lost quite a bit, Stacker is also very good.
    Tranquil Waters

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    This might sound a little harsh, but here I go.

    You have to be responsible for your own weight gains and weight loss. I've been fat and have dieted several times. There is always going to be some kind of temptation, and if you can't fight it, you will not succeed. You cannot hold anyone else responsible for your successes or failures. Your boyfriend bringing you ice cream wasn't helpful, but you present this as if it was a major sin because you just cannot control yourself, and damnit, he should know that!

    I've seen your earlier posts about how you got fat because of your boyfriend's eating habits and now you can't lose weight because of them. You cannot work because of him and you are miserable because of him threatening to throw you out. How dare he ask you to work a low-end job to help pay the rent? It's all HIM. What about YOU?

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    God/dess velvet's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    slim fast ice cream samwiches are great! 120 calories 3 grams of fat.
    As quoted by Luckyone:
    I asked directions from a genie in a bottle of jim beam and she lied to me.

    Methodus saved my life!

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Hey Neptune, your boyfriend sounds like a loser and you deserve better than that. I'd start looking at apartments now (without him knowing) and go back to work immediately so you can afford the down payment. Also, if you rent a house from an individual, it is a lot easier to get approved than an apartment. I've never had anyone look at my credit for approval, they just asked for references from previous landlords. If I didn't have enough, I would make up some, like friends or relatives I can count on to give my prospective landlord a good report.

    Just the emotional abuse he is giving you is enough to make you gain weight. It causes stress which in itself can make the metabolism slower (something about releasing cortisol) and also, emotional stress can lead to eating for happiness. I'm sure we've all been guilty of that.

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    Senior Member m's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    slim fast ice cream samwiches are great! 120 calories 3 grams of fat.
    skinny cow ice-cream is good too.

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    Featured Member Veronika's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    I make fruit smoothies (frozen fruit, spring water and all natural vanilla yogurt) when I want a sweet or perhaps a fruit parfait with low-fat vanilla yogurt and fresh fruit. Real ice cream is too sweet and makes my tummy icky now. You can freeze the blended smoothies to get a good texture.

    Just watch your portion size.

    Weight maintenance is a lifetime thing and substituting heathy treats can go a long way to helping you stick with your plan. My boy can have cookies in the house and they aren't even appealing anymore.

    On another note, Kobi is right about stressful environments contributing to weight gain. Regaining your independence will work wonders for you on many levels. I almost took a weekly apartment once to escape an emotionally abusive environment. A friend let me stay with her instead until I could get a real apartment. Where there is a will there's a way. Not all options are "perfect", but they can bridge you.

    Currently dancing at the Men's Club of Reno, NV
    under the name of Veronica! I am a 2007 calendar girl for MCR, so message me if you want a calendar!

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    Senior Member Neptune's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Hi Emily. Thank you for your input. I knew someone was going to think I am blaming others for my own shortcomings and just posting here bitching about them . I'm seriously NOT pinning blame him. Have you ever been through a tough period and had mixed feelings about a situation? Mixed feelings sometimes appear as if your meaning it's ALL the other person's fault, when you're really not trying to convey that. I'm not faulting him for my own failings, there are plenty of extraordinary traits about the guy that I haven't mentioned here.

    I am aware that I'm responsible for my own weight. But- I also know what I cannot have around the house to be successful. I'm not sure if i should illustrate it like this, but families of recovering addicts, whatever it may be drugs or alcohol help support the recovering person by not having certain items available in the house otherwise it would defeat the first step of recovery; removing all people, places or things that might induce a relapse. Same goes w/food addictions. Weightwatchers uses the steps as well as AA and NA.

    He's supported me enough already, how could I dare ask him to comprimise even more by not bringing home his comfort foods! I know what it sounds like- I could understand the unfairness- but then again, I know what i cannot have here to attain a goal. no one is right or wrong- it's just evident we shouldn't be together.

    I knew my posts were going to give the wrong impression of me.
    ~N

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    I'm not sure if i should illustrate it like this, but families of recovering addicts, whatever it may be drugs or alcohol help support the recovering person by not having certain items available in the house otherwise it would defeat the first step of recovery; removing all people, places or things that might induce a relapse. Same goes w/food addictions. Weightwatchers uses the steps as well as AA and NA.
    Oh, I totally understand it, but the problem is that it's food. Food is everywhere. You have to eat it. You can't give it up. You have to be able to know there is ice cream in vicinity or even have someone eat ice cream in front of you and be like "na". Also, it's okay to treat yourself every once in awhile. You can be a casual food junkie!

    I'm dieting right now...trying to lose a few lbs. The housemom brought in my all-time favorite food....pizza. It was sitting there and all the girls around me were eating it. It was hard to resist, but I did!

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Be glad you dont have my bf,we just got back from the store,he bought,a large bag of m&ms,chips ahoy cookies 4 cadbury bars,he just hides them from me,I know your bf cant hide the icecream but maybe you can buy your own goodies(low fat versions) so you dont crave his,my bf and I use to argue about thisbecause I was watching my weight and he would just say you have to have will power,so get your own goodies that way you wont want his.

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Neptune,also somethinhg to consider,maybe he wants to keep you from losing weight because he really doesnt want you to go back to work,just something my bf said when he came in here and wanted to see why I was posting something about him(so parinoid)

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    Veteran Member pinupgurl2k6's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Quote Originally Posted by tranquil_waters View Post
    My hubby does most of the food shopping. We have so much junk food around. I just don't care, I wont eat it, I convinced myself it taste nasty Go to a GNC store and read the lable for Exenadrine EFX If you can take it then I suggest it. I lost quite a bit, Stacker is also very good.

    Is it that all men are junk food junkies! Mine will buy ice cream and feed me
    a bit sexy but all i'm thinking is this is going straight to my hips!

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    God/dess ahmeerah's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Neptune, your bf sounds like an ass.

    I know you're complaining about the icecream situation but, I feel like you're making *his* issues your own.

    Icecream seems to be the least of your issues.

  20. #20
    zxcire
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Whoa. OLDEST thread ever.

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    pinupgurl must be trying to win the "resurrect the oldest thread" contest.

    She's a WINNER!

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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Like Woah...
    Quote Originally Posted by Jay12 View Post
    ^What Sophia said.
    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us View Post
    I wish there was an "auto-like" setting that I could just have applied to all of your posts Sophia....

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    God/dess LuckyOne's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    DIET SABATOGE!!! I can't restrain myself when its in my face either. I don't keep any junk food in the house. (Ok, maybe a little chocolate.) I do not have a solution for you. I am single!!!

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    Veteran Member pinupgurl2k6's Avatar
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    Default Re: rant: Annoyed at BF bringing home ice cream

    Quote Originally Posted by fancygirl View Post
    pinupgurl must be trying to win the "resurrect the oldest thread" contest.

    She's a WINNER!
    Hey why not I see ice cream rant and I couldn't help it, why post if it's already
    there! Yea do I get a low fat smoothie ?

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