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Thread: I like to watch

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    Member Davey's Avatar
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    Default I like to watch

    OK...so what's so bad about a guy who comes into a club and sais no to the girl who won't let him even have a pull on his first drink before giving him the pitch.

    Face it ladies. I've read a lot of the posts here and so many talk about this being "just a job". I'll bet those are the same ones who are bitching about that cheapskate or the other piker who won't get a lap dance or buy a drink. So....maybe you oughta give the customer a chance to check the merchandise and kick the tires.

    Yeah...I know...it is JUST a job. But....the job is to make me feel like it's not.

    Just some advice.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I almost decided not to respond to this but I decided to anyway (seeing as it's been awhile since I've posted anything).

    I really don't like to hear people complaining. It's bad form to do it with clients/customers but it's worse to hear people argue to get something for free that they should pay for (beyond a door charge). If you want to just watch go to beach, mall, gym, or (my favorite) hospitals w/ the ladies in nursing uniforms. When it comes down to, only assholes waste people's time.

    <Does my bitterness from the dating seen show?>

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    are you complaining about girls that ask to soon or girls that ask after you already said you're just there to watch?

    Sometimes guys do buy dances first thing. Sometimes they don't. We can't know which one you are, but if you are sincere and want to get a dance later, just say so! We understand.


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    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    OK...so what's so bad about a guy who comes into a club and sais no to the girl who won't let him even have a pull on his first drink before giving him the pitch.

    Face it ladies. I've read a lot of the posts here and so many talk about this being "just a job". I'll bet those are the same ones who are bitching about that cheapskate or the other piker who won't get a lap dance or buy a drink. So....maybe you oughta give the customer a chance to check the merchandise and kick the tires.

    Yeah...I know...it is JUST a job. But....the job is to make me feel like it's not.

    Just some advice.
    Some dancers just pounce on you when you walk through the door. Some eventually sidle up to you after a while. Some know full well you just got there. Some have no idea that you haven't been sitting there for very long.

    You are painting all dancers with the same brush. That is patently unfair. In any endevor where there are a lot of different, diverse people, you will find some who you like and some who rub you the wrong way. Take a pragmatic approach and just accept that will be so. It does no harm to say "Sorry, I just got here and would like to settle in". I use that all the time. Its just polite and it works.

    A dancer on any given night sees a sea of faces. The give and take of the job is that you get to see her in various states if undress and sensuality, she makes a living off of it through your tips. In that sense, when a dancer asks you for a dance, it really IS her job to do so.

    Thats just one man's perspective. I hope it helps.

    PJ

  5. #5
    Pamela
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I have no problem with what Davey said, let him sit down get comfortable, order a drink, and check out to see if any dancers in the club look like the type he wants to spend money on.

    No problem. I myself have gone into clubs (not working, but as a customer) and got slammed as soon as i was sitting down, it's annoying.

    Experienced dancers will keep her eye on you, but give you time.

    Pamela

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I always let the guy sit there for awhile and finish a drink or something... but sometimes I can 't keep an eye on everyone and I don't know if the guy just got there or not.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Member Davey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I almost decided not to respond to this but I decided to anyway (seeing as it's been awhile since I've posted anything).

    I really don't like to hear people complaining. It's bad form to do it with clients/customers but it's worse to hear people argue to get something for free that they should pay for (beyond a door charge). If you want to just watch go to beach, mall, gym, or (my favorite) hospitals w/ the ladies in nursing uniforms. When it comes down to, only assholes waste people's time.

    <Does my bitterness from the dating seen show?>

    Hey Socks,

    I'm not sure if you're male or female but one thing is for sure, you're outlook on life in general needs to take a positve turn.

    Thanks for the information on your favorite spots for visual stimulation. The next time I'm looking to rub up against a tree or a door jamb I'll be sure and remember your recommendations.

    No one said anything about getting something for nothing and my post was certainly not a complaint. Just a bit of advice was offered to those that do complain about customers who don't tip or buy dances.

    A lot depends on attitude as it does in every business. Be positive, pleasant and engaging and people will want to deal with you. Be overly aggresive, surly and negative and people will shy away. Haven't you noticed how there are always those hanging around the water cooler or coffee pot complaining about things? They're usually not the ones getting ahead.

    Hope that advice helps you with your "dating scene" as well.

    Have a good day. *S*

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I can certainly understand Davey's concern.

    When I went to Cheetah's in Las Vegas, I got the annoying "wanna dance" litterally ten seconds after paying my cover (not exaggerating ...TEN seconds!). The next night at Sapphire, I don't think a period of 30 seconds elapsed where I wasn't either getting a dance or being asked for one (okay so maybe it was more like 45-60 seconds). I'd like to check out the entertainers myself before deciding which ones to buy dances from. At $20/song, a guy has to be kind of selective.

    That point taken, I think one needs to realize that in a club full of people where dozens of ladies are going back and forth to the dressing room, noticing which customer just showed up and which has been there awhile isn't going to be a perfect science. I can't read the dancers minds, so why should I expect that of them. If I'm not interested or not ready yet, I just say "no thank you".

    I've had a few gals get huffy about it, but most of them seem take it in stride.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    when i go into a club where I don't know all the gals working there, (mostly Platinum plus) I like to watch the stage dances first, if I dancer asks me for a dance, I will say flat out that I am still browsing. remember while you make you money of us in the vip room, you sell yourself on stage.....

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Some time's I don't feel like shopping with my wife and I will go to the club and just sit and watch. It's very relaxing and a great view. I'm not a millionare and don't always have extra money to buy dances. I do tip at the stage and do my best to be nice when turning down the dancers. I still get called a cheep ass on other strippers sites. A few bucks from a guy is better than nothing right?
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I can fully understand not always having the money to buy dances. I don't mind when people come in just to watch. However, many dancers expect or count on making a certain amount every night to pay bills or whatever. So if you're the fifth person in a row to say that you're there "just to watch" I can understand some frustration on their parts. I consider it my job not to let negative attitudes like that show. But surely you can understand how a few one dollar bills rather than a dance or two can be a let down to an already icky night. Especially since the last year or two has been really hard on most dancers in general.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Customers that just, "Sit and Watch" very interesting. That customers feel this is an appropriate thing to do in a "Strip Club" is very sad indeed. If you are going to a strip club it's just common sense that you would come monetarily prepared. Men like, "Big Daddy", seem to be very ignorant and pretty rude customers. You don't have to be a millionare to put a side a little money to buy at least a couple of dances from a dancer or two.
    As far as "Davey" claiming he's just trying to give us dancers a little advice and he's not complaining, well, keep lieing to yourself buddy. pretty weak.
    It's funny how some men on this forum lately have been saying how us dancers have such attitudes and how we hate men, when all I see is a bunch of men with attitudes who seem to hate women. By the way boys the women in our industry that make the best living are those annoying dancers that pounce on you when you walk in. It's generally the amatures that will sit with you for free or just to get a free drink. And one last comment, just as you wouldn't go into a regurlar bar and tell the bartender "I don't want a drink right now, and sit there for hours staring at the bottles of alcohol, it's just as ludicrous for you to go into a strip club and not expect to have to pay to watch and to get at least a couple of dances. Believe me no one minds if it takes you a little bit to pick the right girl but it's another thing to see you week after week in the same bar chair nursing your bud light and waiting for the two for one special. Geesh!!!

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Very well said Candice. If I had the money to visit a strip club every day I would. However, I refuse to walk through those doors unless I have at least $300 that I intend to spend. Going to a strip club with out any money really isn't a very polite thing to do at all.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Ignorant is as Ignorant does! Candice I'm sorry you feel this way. I'm not ignorant or rude! Your providing a service. Your service to me (in this case) is to put on a relaxing show! I don't always just sit and watch I have spent a lot of money in strip clubs and enjoy doing so. I hope not all dancers share your opinion. I do understand you may have been turned down before me but thats how it goes in your business. When I return to the club I remember who is rude and spend my money on others. So keep this in mind grin and bare (put up with not get naked) it.
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Listen Forest, all I'm trying to say is, that customers that come in that just sit and give a dollar or two to every girl that goes on stage really isn't helping our bottom line. If you want to just sit and watch it would be a lot nicer and more respectful for you to rent a video of some sort or buy a magazine and you can watch all you want. The way the system works is you tip a girl on stage that you like and that tells her that you are interested in her and for her to solicit you for a dance. It would be a lot better for you not to go to a club 5 or 6 times and just save up your money and go in one time and buy the girl of your choice several dances. If not you truly do come across like a cheapskate. And for that night you at least lived like a King. Dancers dancing on the stage are not just decoration for the club we are advertising ourselves for a table and or lap dance, not for you to just sit and stare. The amount of work we do on stage is worth a heck of a lot more than a dollar.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I'm not going to fight with you on this. I do what I do because I want. You do as you do for the same reason. I was just adding what I do, not get ripped for it, but to add my 2 cents.
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    Featured Member Lilith's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I think both sides are coming at this from totally opposite extremes. Let's see if understanding cannot be attained by the middle ground (gotta love Buddha!).

    You have a customer come in for just a bit of "down" time, a nice relaxing hour or two. He spends $20 on his drinks, tips the stage with another $30 and buys a drink for that cheerful dancer who played his favorite song. No big deal; this fellow came in with a purpose and spent money. Though not a lot of money, a dozen fellows like him will even out the crowd and minimize the damage done to a girl's ego by those customers who won't tip the stage ever. Few dancers resent this sort of fellow unless it is a truly horrid night and he is the sole customer (and even then, they are more upset at the lousy state of business than this fellow's desire to merely tip the stage for an hour). This customer spent $25-50 per hour for his entertainment.


    For you guys, there is also the other end of the "sit and watch" spectrum. These "customers" (and I use the term loosely) will come to a strip club with $10 in their pockets. They buy a $6 pitcher of beer and nurse it for four hours. They then park their keisters in a seat and watch the show... for free. They won't tip their waitress. They won't tip the bar. They wouldn't tip the stage if Jenna Jamison were shaking her ass upon it and they state this fact as if it was worthy of admiration. These fellows behave as if dancers run a charity show for losers who can't get girlfriends. This guy spent $1.50 per hour for his entertainment.


    Any dancer who has had the misfortune of meeting enough of the $1.50 per hour customer grows to hate those who "sit and watch". Face it, guys, these fellows are assholes and "sit and watch" becomes a catchphrase for "cheap sonofabitch looking for a free woody". Try saying something like "I just wanted to relax, but I'll be tipping" to distinguish yourself from this pathetic breed of "customer".
    He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you. ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

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    Member Davey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Lilith....There you go again, darlin. Just taking the extreme view about men who frequent your club. I don't know where you're dancin in Florida, but tell me they have $6.00 pitchers of beer? *LMAO* What's a lap dance cost.....$5.00? ROTFLMAO.

    You've just got to be joking. My how times have changed down on the bayou. Give me the name of a club that doesn't charge a minimum of a $10 to $20 dollar cover and $5 to $8 dollars a watered down drink. Move to Vegas girl. I can give you the name of a club that charges a $40 dollar cover with a two drink minimum. I wouldn't call the guy who visits a "cheap sonofabitch" especially if the girls workin the club have your attitude. I'd call him "ripped off" when the stage dancer rolls around the pole half asleep and he's payed a total of $52.00 to walk thru the door.

    Then again....you think everyone who walks thru your clubs door owes you a living. *LOL*

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I think a lot depends on the type of club that you choose to frequent. For example, in Los Angeles, a lot of the nude clubs are considered "lap factories", where there the main emphasis is on lap dances, and the stage show is secondary. In this type of club, a casual customer who just wanted to watch the show probably wouldn't be very well received. This type of customer is likely to be ignored after being asked 20 times by every dancer in there if he wants a dance.
    However, there are also smaller neighborhood clubs that are usually topless. Here the atmosphere is much more casual and relaxed and conducive to hanging out and tipping a few bucks to the girls on stage. I imagine the latter type of club would be a much more pleasant experience for a customer who did not intend to shell out a lot of money for lap dances. Maybe it's just me, but if I wasn't in the mood to spend money, I would tend to avoid the former type of club. Being asked for lap dances by a barrage of dancers when I knew for a fact that I just wasn't interested wouldn't put me in a good mood; rather, it would just put me on the defensive and want to avoid any interaction with the dancers. Having said that, I do think it's generally unprofessional to cop an attitude with a customer who wasn't spending money, providing they weren't rude to me first.

    By the way, I thought Lillith's response was very diplomatic and well-reasoned.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Boy am I glad I work in upscale clubs,but if a guy isnt spending any money,I dont bother with him I find the ones who are,I also dont expect every guy to want to get dances with me or give me their money,I just leave them alone and find the ones who do like me and want to give me money.There were always guys that girls would say oh he is a cheepo,but I would get tons of money of him,theres no need for an attitude,just be nice and friendly to everyone,even if they dont give you money,you will make up for it in the long run and if a guy isnt giving you money ,doesnt always make him a cheepskate,with the rare exception of guys that just watch,dont tip and never give anyone any money.

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    Member Davey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Why Lilith, just missed that vitriolic little post of yours. *LOL*

    I'm sure down in the Everglades where you dance all them good ol boys just love your attitude. I see in one of your post that you've now gruduated to the big city. Good luck to you.....but you'll need to take the chip off your shoulder or your gown just won't fit right, darlin. *chuckle*

    I'm surprised though that being the upscale, sophisticated and intelligent girl that you are, you'd now sink to name calling....Slugger. *L* *tsk...tsk*

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    I can give you the name of a club that charges a $40 dollar cover with a two drink minimum. I wouldn't call the guy who visits a "cheap sonofabitch" especially if the girls workin the club have your attitude. I'd call him "ripped off" when the stage dancer rolls around the pole half asleep and he's payed a total of $52.00 to walk thru the door.
    Then again....you think everyone who walks thru your clubs door owes you a living. *LOL*
    If that club is too expensive for you, go somewhere else! It is not the dancers' responsibility to entertain you for free. The girls who work at that expensive club pay a hell of a lot more than your $52 just to walk through the door, and you can damn well bet that if they're working for your entertainment, you most certainly DO owe them something. The show is not for free.

    And oh yes, any guy who walks into a club with just enough money to pay the cover and buy a drink or two will be considered a cheap sonofabitch - no matter what the cover and drink prices are. If you've only got $52 to spend, you need to go to a cheaper place. Period. It doesn't matter if you feel that is an overly expensive price - if you go there and then don't tip anyone or buy any dances, you are just as cheap a sonofabitch as the morons who go to a hole in the wall with $10 in their pockets, pay the $3 cover, buy the $6.50 pitcher of Busch, and sit for hours not tipping anyone.


    Now I am not of the opinion that guys who go to a club and only buy drinks and tip on stage are cheap or assholes. I don't mind dancing on stage for those guys, because at least my time on stage wasn't totally wasted. Most of the guys who buy the dances don't tip on stage, or at least not much. I will circulate the crowd after my set and look for dances, thank those who tipped me if it's not too busy or at least thank those who tipped me well. Even on a crappy night with no dances, if the guys are tipping on stage, I can still leave with at least $100. That is better than nothing!

    ******************

    But to get back on the original topic, it is impossible for every dancer to know whether every customer she sees at any given moment just walked in or not. We might have been busy when you made your entrance. We understand it is annoying to be pounced on immediately upon entering and before you've even had a chance to get a drink. I have been guilty of approaching guys who had just walked in without knowing - but as soon as I realize they are just getting their first drink, I apologize and let them know I can come back later if they prefer. They appreciate that and almost always tell me to stay. Like any other situation between customer and dancer, it only takes a small effort to keep the peace. If you get approached too soon after entering the club, just politely tell the girl you just arrived and want to have a drink first. If you might want her company later, tell her to come back - if not, don't mention it. For dancers, if a guy says he's just arrived and wants a chance to get a drink or look around, don't get frustrated, just smile let him know you can come back later if he wants. Wish him a good time - he may ask you to stay or seek you out later.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Member Davey's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Bridgette....I wouldn't dream of walking around with just $52.00 in my pocket anywhere. *L*

    And I have no problem with anything you said in this p
    art of your post:

    "But to get back on the original topic, it is impossible for every dancer to know whether every customer she sees at any given moment just walked in or not. We might have been busy when you made your entrance. We understand it is annoying to be pounced on immediately upon entering and before you've even had a chance to get a drink. I have been guilty of approaching guys who had just walked in without knowing - but as soon as I realize they are just getting their first drink, I apologize and let them know I can come back later if they prefer. They appreciate that and almost always tell me to stay. Like any other situation between customer and dancer, it only takes a small effort to keep the peace. If you get approached too soon after entering the club, just politely tell the girl you just arrived and want to have a drink first. If you might want her company later, tell her to come back - if not, don't mention it. For dancers, if a guy says he's just arrived and wants a chance to get a drink or look around, don't get frustrated, just smile let him know you can come back later if he wants. Wish him a good time - he may ask you to stay or seek you out later. "

    In most cases that's what does happen. But.....there are times when a girl just can't take any rejection at all and gets fixated in her mind that "he" won't spend the money.

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I like to watch

    Well I made that reply before seeing your later post. It wasn't really meant as an attack anyway, more of an observation that guys who walk into a club intending only to pay the cover and drink minimum shouldn't even be there. They could go to a regular bar for that or save their dollars so they can go to the strip club and at least tip for services! I don't think anyone should be expected to work for free. I think we are in basic agreement - when a dancer realizes a guy has just walked in the door, she could give him a little space. At the same time, a guy who gets approached too soon or often doesn't need to be rude about telling the girl(s) to move along. Most clubs are allowing basically any girl who walks in willing to pay the fees to work, so there are often way too many girls on shift, and that forces girls to become much more aggressive to earn the $$$. This leads to customers getting approached way to soon and often. A little understanding on both sides goes a long way.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: I like to watch

    A girl who gets mad or an attitude with you if you just walked in the door and tell her to come back latter should re think dancing,girls are going to get a lot of that in a 6 or 7 hour shift,you just have to remain polite and continue on asking,though the girls that do act that way just leave more money for me,we have to be actors in this business and be nice even if you dont want to,it will make you more in the long run and davey maybe you should start frequenting a more upscale establishment,in most upscale clubs you have to wave girls down for dances and most defiinately wont hound you.But you need to be polite as well.

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