Results 1 to 16 of 16

Thread: PLEASE HELP

  1. #1
    Curious Guest
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    3
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default PLEASE HELP

    Hi: Their was a post on this board that has been taken off subject please help. For anyone that did read it or
    responded to it I am the wife of MUP who is responding to needing more details. Yes my husband gave the dancer his phone number to why he did this I honestly don't know and I don't really know if he does either. I know that some men start thinking with their other head when they start hearing nice words and thinking it is more than what it really is. No I am not the naive wife who thinks that he didn't do anything wrong. To answer some of the questions that were asked here it goes. We live in a smaller city, the dancer's parents live in the same city, she knew this so it is not so hard to find out about things like where we live where we work and so on. The phone calls starting coming from a man who said he was her f*****g partner. They never once called the phone number that my husband gave her. He talked about things like my husband fooling around and having certain lap dances and why was I still with a person like this who had no respect for this wife and that would fool around. Basically all the phone calls were the same, saying the same thing and that the only reason I was getting them was because she didn't want to have anything to do with a guy like that and I should be alot smarter and not be with him. The last two phone calls I got was from a women (they never give their names) I persume it is the dancer saying the same things but the difference is she is either stoned or drunk when she calls because she is slurring alot of her words giggling alot and not making much since about some of the things she says. I asked her if this is her way of wanting to go out with my husband why not just phone him she says "no" thats not want she wants and never did. That I am a stupid bitch for putting up with a man like that. The sending me stuff in the mail was a receipt and a love letter that someone had typed and put my husband's name on the bottom of it. Not saying it wasn't my husband that did it but they could of done it to make it look like he did it. The question that my husband was trying to ask is why would a person do this or any insight as to why a dancer feels she has to do this instead of just saying no to him. I am not saying that this situation is all her fault it takes two to tango . Me and my husband have had many conversations about this (fights) and I don't think anything sexual did take place outside the lap dances. The message board came when my husband posted a post about the dancer to see if he could get any insight as to what people thought about her or what she was really like some of the responses back was she liked her booze and drugs that she had some problems along the way. I got a phone call from the dancers friend saying that my husband was looking for her again and wanted to go out with her because he saw it on the board. I think he was just guessing and didn't tell him either way. I know some of you are probably thinking that I am being naive and not looking at the hole picture but as I said we have had many of fights about this and I do understand that he is as much to blame for this as anyone and so does he. He has admitted to some of the stuff but not to others as he says it never happen that I believe because I know him. Again thinking with the little head and not the big, anything can happen.
    Any insight would be appreciated. Thanks

  2. #2
    Member
    Joined
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    71
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    it sounds to me like the dancer is actually bitter about the situation and indeed is the one that wants to go out with your husband. now this is just a possibility, judging by how the dancer is acting, i would say something deeper could have happened with the two of them. maybe then your husband broke it off, and now the dancer is upset about it. again i stress this is just a hypothesis. but you know how women get, especially young ones, id say they were seeing each other, your husband broke it off, and now the dancer is hurt. so she calls when shes drunk, cause she thinks about it.....or geez anything. shes saying things like "how can you put up with a man like that" makes me believe that she has been hurt by him in some way. i could be wrong but im sure you can figure out the rest of my hypothesis.....remember it is just that and she could just be crazy.......who knows in this business.

  3. #3
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2002
    Location
    On a sweet muddy river.
    Posts
    6,399
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 78 Times in 43 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP


    Or... she has issues with men and your husband said/did something that really offended her (giving her his number?) and she is playing out her fantasy of trying to ruin his life.

    Lena



  4. #4
    Banned
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    CA.
    Posts
    929
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    I think you need to establish better communication with your husband. Your relationship does not seem in the best condition. In the first place , what is your husband doing associating with this woman in the first place? Maybe the two of you need some counseling.

  5. #5
    Veteran Member xmarx52's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    one foot in the grave...
    Posts
    644
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Mup,

    First off I am not a dancer, I don't even go to clubs anymore I am just a guy who likes to chat with the ladies here and am very happily married to my lovely wife ok?

    Your post is confusing to me but what I can make out this stripper is calling and ridiculing you etc, about your hubby hanging in the clubs etc, right?

    The ladies here (this forum) are mostly some VERY nice people, the kind of ladies who would never do the kind of thing you are describing. But in any profession, lawyers, Doctor or strippers, there are nice people and few nuts and some just plain mean folks.

    She may not know your hubby other than as a customer but just hates men and is bitter due to not really liking her job and calling and abusing you somehow makes her feel better. "Everybody has to have somebody to look down on", remember that old song?

    Or maybe your hubby did tick her off somehow and this is her way of making trouble for him, by abusing and harassing you. Either way that sucks and it is not right. I would try using *69 the next time they call and get their number and then report them to the phone company.

    You and your hubby need to work this out between you though. Best of luck with this.


    Also though, many years ago my ex wife got some calls like this, the woman on the phone would say stuff like, "I work with you and it is shameful the way your husband is running around with other women" etc etc etc. And the truth is I WAS TOTALLY INNOCENT. I have NEVER gone out on my ex or my present wife and that is a fact but this evil person was just trying to make trouble in my marriage. ( Many of the ladies here will tell you how much I go on about how I love my wife and am loyal to here etc) So keep in mind some times people just want to make problems because they have nothing in thier own lives worth doing so they want to make your life as crappy as their life is.

    Try to keep your head clear and good luck.
    Anyone with a memory should be very humble.

  6. #6
    Pamela
    Guest

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Why is he looking for information about her ? Is he interested ? And these phone calls to your house, well someone gave the number out, the dancer i would guess got it from your husband ?

    Yes, it's time to have a heart to heart about this situation. Don't accuse, or yell if you can help it, (i know it can be hard) you have a much better chance of finding out what is really going on by keeping your composure during the conversation.

    Let him talk, listen. Then talk.
    Good luck hun,

    Pamela

  7. #7
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    1,088
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 4 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    I t sounds like her boyfriend called first, so he probably found the number and got mad and made her call and do that because he was jelous,chances are she never went out w/ your husband or was even going to call and then her jealous freak of a boyfriend found the number and wanted to start trouble.

  8. #8
    Veteran Member xmarx52's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    one foot in the grave...
    Posts
    644
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Good point Michele,

    It may be a thing where the jealous BF started it and now the girl has to go along or the BF will be mad or whatever.

    Oh what a tangled web we weave....
    Anyone with a memory should be very humble.

  9. #9
    Veteran Member TrixieFL's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    South FL and Traveling the US
    Posts
    242
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Ok 1st of I agree that your husband probly did something to upset or offend this girl. Find out what he did, maybe he can apologize. Also, wise up. Your husband is obviously trying to cheat on you, and not to be harsh or mean but he probly has b4 or will agian.

  10. #10
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Southern Florida
    Posts
    150
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    I t sounds like her boyfriend called first, so he probably found the number and got mad and made her call and do that because he was jelous,chances are she never went out w/ your husband or was even going to call and then her jealous freak of a boyfriend found the number and wanted to start trouble.

    I've been in this spot....... as well as seen it more than once......

    99% of it is instigated by the girl's boyfriend/SO/husband........ These ladies are handed telephone numbers as well as business cards all night long.

    Occaisionally they will ask for a number to make someone feel special or keep the contact alive and the guy interested in coming back.

    The vast majority of the napkins with numbers and business cards are dumped into the trash at the end of a night. But for a few minutes the guy feels special.

    It almost always means absolutely nothing.

    Sometimes these numbers stay in their purses or are forgotten.

    It's a very insecure and imature man that will dig through their purses looking for these numbers. I can admit to being one at one time although it only lasted a few days before I got my head back on straight. I think many men have a doubtful moment. Not all though go as far as this guy.

    If your getting calls from a drunk and giggling girl it's probably some frind of the guy and most likely not even the lady in question. They are having fun at your expense.

    Next time they call be calm and say " You know what? I really don't care how he spends his half of the divorce settlement" and hang up. They probably won't call again.

    If you believe him and you need reassurance put him on the spot to take you clubbing.

    Just because your man is in a strip club does not mean he is looking to cheat on you. Men are visual creatures and like the entertainment and attention and he may be going through a mid life crisis and needing an attention fix.

    Forget what you hear or get in the mail and just go see for yourself.


    I have a difficult time meeting ladies!

  11. #11
    Featured Member LEIGH_LANDON's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2002
    Location
    tee dot
    Posts
    1,476
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    can't ya just change the dang number?
    LIVE LONG & PROSPER!
    Leigh Landon

    Never explain yourself to anyone, because the person who likes you doesn't need it and the person that dislikes you won't believe it.

  12. #12
    Veteran Member xmarx52's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    one foot in the grave...
    Posts
    644
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    can't ya just change the dang number?

    Now there you go again Leigh being reasonable and using logic. Cut that out! LOL
    Anyone with a memory should be very humble.

  13. #13
    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2003
    Posts
    1,355
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 5 Times in 5 Posts

    Default xmarx52

    You mean there is a way to stop the VCR from blinking "12:00" all the time? Why didn't someone tell me?
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

  14. #14
    Veteran Member xmarx52's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    one foot in the grave...
    Posts
    644
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: xmarx52

    You mean there is a way to stop the VCR from blinking "12:00" all the time? Why didn't someone tell me?
    I usually just shoot mine with a 356 Magnum, is there a second way?
    Anyone with a memory should be very humble.

  15. #15
    Curious Guest
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    3
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Hi everyone: I want to thank you for all your replys. Apparently thee individuals
    invovled got into some trouble awhile back for various reasons that I talked about
    in my post this was not the first time she/he had done this to a married couple here the husband had spent time in this club. The information I recieved was from
    a couple different sources that knew of she/he. As far as my husband and I go we have worked out things regarding the above post. (shortend his leash a little HA HA) Again thanks for the replys.

  16. #16
    Veteran Member xmarx52's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Location
    one foot in the grave...
    Posts
    644
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: PLEASE HELP

    Hi Mup,

    Hey so you checked back at this bastion of wisdom and knowledge to see what advice we had come up with. Cool, and now you know how to stop your VCR from blinking 12:00 too.

    I hope things work out with your hubby.
    Anyone with a memory should be very humble.

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •