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Thread: Should I say I'm single???

  1. #26
    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    im married and have always worn my ring on and off stage i dont feel it has hurt my money at all i have a lot of regulars and they are married too. i agree with the earlier posting from whispers
    I don't know lexus, I think I'd be far too distracted with other...things...to notice a ring on a dancer's finger.

    Anyway, just to add my $.02 to the topic; While I've never asked out a dancer and don't go to SCs looking for a date, it does ruin the 'fantasy' for me a little when a dancer volunteers that she has a BF/husband/kids. I never ask, because I don't want to find out she's not single but I also don't want her to lie, so not asking is a good solution for me.

    Why does it ruin the 'fantasy' for me? I'm not really sure, but it somehow inserts a little too much 'reality' into a situation that I'd rather keep just a fantasy. It's kind of like someone standing up at a magic show and pointing out the secret to the trick, it ruins the carefully crafted illusion of the performance. I don't want to see the 'strings.' I don't want there to be a dressing room, merely a gateway to sexual paradise dancers descend from to tease and entice us with their feminine wiles, a fantasy realm of angelic sex goddesses who have no significant others, no desire for our money, merely the desire to dance the striptease and seduce us to our heart's content....

    ( hey, I can fantasize all I want, right? )
    -lestatdl1
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

  2. #27
    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    I've only recently changed my position on this... I've been saying I'm single "footloose and fancy free" to all the customers when asked.

    Now.. I've changed to letting the customer hear what they want to hear...

    If they want me to be a single mother: I am and have a story for that.
    If they want me to be bi-sexual or lesbian: I am and have the okay with a couple of dancers to say that her and me have "fun" ;-) all the time hence why not take the BOTH of us for a private dance?
    If they want me to be single: I am and will say whatever reason they want to hear for why I'm single

    I say this because I did this last night with success:
    I did a private dance for two guys (allowed at my club) and one of the guys asked if I was married or had a boyfriend. I told him I had both. This surprised both of them :-D and they thought it was facinating. Of course, since I was telling them I'm 23.. I told them that I had only been married for 2 years.

    I used to have just one story about myself that I would stick to and tell the customers.. however since I've changed tactic and now use whatever story the customer wants to hear from me... it is better.



    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    Senior Member cassidykarma's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    this was so interesting. i have actually worn a ring that looks liike an engagement ring even though I was single and "studied" who notices or comments. Sometimes the men notice immediately, some don't at all. Some catch it later. It's amusing to see when they realize I have a rock on my finger and how long it takes for them to say something if they say something at all. Sometimes I have caught them completely distracted by it during the dance.... eyes on the boobs,...back to the ring,...etc....when asked I would tell them it was not real and prove so by showing them the green mark underneath. Sometimes when I knew they were staring at it but didn't ask I will tell them the same. I just wink and tell them it's to protect myself from the real weirdos (complementing them since I opened up and must not think THEY are the weirdos) they never usually ask if I am single after that... One other thing... i wore the ring to also see if it would affect my money. It did not. One time the ring helped me make money. I had a guy pay for a friend to get his bachelor dance and this guys' SO was in the bar as well. SHE FREAKED! Saying I could not give her man the dance. I wanted the flipping cash so to settle her down I showed her MY RING and said (in private only to her) "don't worry sweetheart. I don't want to take your man, I have my own. I am just here to make some money." The woman TOTALLY relaxed, made a comment on how MY ring was bigger (ha ha it was $8 at wal-mart, and let me make my money. No problems

    Another point I have seen to telling them the truth about not being single is if i say I am I usualy get get asked out immediately following (isn't that why they are asking?) and now I have to think of something creative besides "Are you f**king HIGH!!!"

    Also, it makes it clear to them that it is just the fantasy. If someone won't dance me because I have a boy, well chances are, our dancer/customer relationship is going to turn out screwy somewhere down the line anyway.

    I also sometimes retort "Well sure I do, but you don't want to have me thinking about him right now do you?

    Heck, some guys might like the fact you are taken...as if they are stepping on your boy's territory

  4. #29
    Veteran Member Tia_q's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    I've only recently changed my position on this... I've been saying I'm single "footloose and fancy free" to all the customers when asked.

    Now.. I've changed to letting the customer hear what they want to hear...

    If they want me to be a single mother: I am and have a story for that.
    If they want me to be bi-sexual or lesbian: I am and have the okay with a couple of dancers to say that her and me have "fun" ;-) all the time hence why not take the BOTH of us for a private dance?
    If they want me to be single: I am and will say whatever reason they want to hear for why I'm single

    I say this because I did this last night with success:
    I did a private dance for two guys (allowed at my club) and one of the guys asked if I was married or had a boyfriend. I told him I had both. This surprised both of them :-D and they thought it was facinating. Of course, since I was telling them I'm 23.. I told them that I had only been married for 2 years.

    I used to have just one story about myself that I would stick to and tell the customers.. however since I've changed tactic and now use whatever story the customer wants to hear from me... it is better.

    How on earth are you going to remember who you told what to, if they happen to come back in the club? My head would be spinning! lol :o

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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    "I also sometimes retort "Well sure I do, but you don't want to have me thinking about him right now do you? "


    This is a good one. I used this the other night and the guy giggled like a school girl....but paid like a gent

  6. #31
    Senior Member Heaven's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    When I first starting dancing I was very honest, maybe too honest. I told guys that I had a boyfriend and sometimes I could read the disappointment in their face. I am now getting beck in the game and I will not tell them that I have a man, besides I don't tell them my number, where I live, or my real name. I keep everything separate - so in the club I'm Heaven, not _____ and I don't have a man (so the fantasy lives on).
    Perception is Reality

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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    I like to help " coach " my girl's especially in area's like this one. If the customer, and most regular's usually do, attempt to take the " relationship " to the next level. I advise them to tell the guy that they started "seeing " some one !!!! Not really committed but semi-attached and that you owe him the respect as not to " see " other men until you decide whether or not you want to be with him. Telling him ( the customer ) that he would expect the same respect if it where him you where "seeing" . I kinda leave's the door cracked alittle, so as not to slam it in his face .

  8. #33
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    Oh, absolutely say you are single! Telling your customers that you are in a relationship kind-of ruins their experience.. they like to sit in their chairs thinking that you, an incredibly hot, sexy, sultry woman has an interest in them. We create fantasies for them night in night out. Reminding them that we have an involved romantic life doesn't aid in their fantasy.

  9. #34
    Member Lynn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    Saying your single can work for or against you. Do what you're comfortable with. The worst thing you can do is tell too many "stories" (lies). Pick one situation and stick with it. Whether it be truth or fantasy, and you should do alright.

  10. #35
    Veteran Member ChristyWild's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    My 2 cents is that I always go by the 'Coyote Ugly' motto: seem available, but never BE available. We are fantasy women there to fulfill your fantasy for your time in the club. Hence, to do or say anything that would intrude on that fantasy is bad. I have two roommates- one male and one female, and I tell my customers that. It's interesting, and a fantasy in and of itself. And it makes for interesting conversation. But, even if I do date or not, I don't tell customers that b/c a) It's REALLY none of their business, and b) Like people have said, it's nicer to the male ego to think that you're available.

    Only once recently has that backfired- I was talking to this car saleman who said he could help me find a car. I gave him my email, but told him that since I had a kid, I couldn't go to the auction with him like he wanted. His response? 'well, I have a 16 yr old...why don't we all go out to dinner sometime?' What the gaul!!! Anyways, I told him that I didn't meet customers outside of the club b/c of my daughter, but he didn't get the hint I wasn't interested. He even emailed me the next day asking if I wanted to go to the beach. When I said my weekend was full, he replied with 'well then why'd you give me your email?' God, some guys just don't get the hint that we DON'T date you guys!
    Age is only important when it comes to wine and whiskey!



  11. #36
    Newbie Lilah's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    Anais in my opinion is right. I tell the guys that ask me if I'm married, the truth, yes I am. I don't want to dance for the guys that are tryin to get me out of there. I want to dance for the guys that it doesn't bother. I'm married, so you better get it while u can! That's my motto! Good luck to all you ladies!

  12. #37
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    Default Re: Should I say I'm single???

    Quote Originally Posted by Zofia link=board=9;threadid=4152;start=msg49942#msg49942 date=1034108410
    I either told them I was single, or had a girlfriend. When I said I had a girlfriend, it always opened up a new line of conversation.
    Did you end up getting a guy to give you and another dancer a dance with this line? If you do does the other dnacer tip you out? Well a lot of guys do fantasize about having two girls at once I know I have done it a few times

    Hugs,
    Melissa
    Hugs and Love to all my ladies,
    Melissa

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    Member EveOnline's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    I get paid to fulfill a fantasy! Thats what I do, whether I'm single or not is none of there business.... I don't ask about thier wife and kids. Plus they'd probably lie about it anyhow if they thought they had a chance with me....LOL!
    You win the battles... I'll win the war!
    In the meantime, I'm laughing (dancing) my ass off all the way to the bank!!!

  14. #39
    Member memelissa13's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    How many guys do have a chance with lol

    Hugs

    Do I have a better shot considering I am a hottie I was told that today it made my night

    Muah
    Melissa
    Hugs and Love to all my ladies,
    Melissa

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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    I agree w/ you Anais! I am married, and I wear my rings at work. I really do not think this hurts my money. My regulars know that I am married, and they dont care because they are married too!

    I just dont lie about it. If a guy thinks you are hot, he doesnt care if you are single or not. Most men understand that they are in a STRIPCLUB..they are not there to 'date' you...and those who do not understand that arent worth any $$$$ anyway.

    Plus, it makes it easier to turn guys down. Example "wanna meet me after work?" "Can i call you?"....etc. "SORRY, I AM MARRIED/TAKEN".....and then you can flirt, and add "otherwise, I might have taken you up on that..."

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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    It depends on what types of vibes I am getting from the guys. Usually older men with rings on their fingers I tell the truth about having someone special because they aren't too persistent about taking you home. But the younger guys, I ALWAYS tell them I am taken because they will insist that I need to date them or go out to dinner with them. Hell no!

  17. #42
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    YES.. you must be single girlie! Well, you dont HAVE TO BE... but its a fantasy killer for a guy.

  18. #43
    Veteran Member oceanblue's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    This is funny, My best highest paying customer IS married and he does know that i have a boyfriend. Hasnt hurt things abit. He still loves to be my regular and even jokes that hes my second boyfriend!
    Few people understand the psychology of dealing with a highway traffic cop. Your normal speeder will panic and immediately pull over to the side. This is wrong. It arouses contempt in the cop-heart. Make the bastard chase you. He will follow. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

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    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    I am all over this one.I am getting too tired of fending off the "dinners" and "wanna be friends" that I could yak.
    Some guys are sooooo lame.Like since I have my clothes off and am potentially doing a lap dance for them that I should be available to go out with them.I finally got burnt last night and told one guy "do you know how many guys ask me to go out with them in a night" This loser says "well I'm not like those other guys"No matter what I said I couldn't get No through his head. And I said No.WTF!!!!! This is happening more and more.I tell them I don't have the time because I sleep so late and then have a few prescious hours to get personal things done and then have to be at work.One asshole said I should make the time!!!I always tell them I am single and not looking because I just got a divorce.( I have a bf)HELP!!!!!!

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    Frankly if youre giving me a great LD I dont care if you are married/attached or not nor do I care if you wear you ring or not. Im not going to spend much time looking at your fingers OTOH, if Im working towards private sessions Id much prefer an unattached dancer. I dont relish the thought of some crazy SO banging on the hotel door with a 357 in hand.

    FBR

    PS: Mare, if you would stop showing your customers the picture of you riding Studbuster (talk about sexual inuendo LOL) they wouldnt go so crazy
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  21. #46
    Veteran Member foxee555's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    I think that your clientles' age group is probably the biggest factor in whether to say youve got a man or not. Older men are less likely to care about your personal life than the young guys. Young men generally want to feel like they have shot. It's an ego thing. When I worked in Miami, guys hardly even asked if I was attached. But, in Guam (where my customers are mainly U.S. military and young) they ask ALL THE TIME! They want to believe they've got a shot. So, I don't tell them I'm living with someone.
    I did recently get caught by an older customer of mine recently though. He was a bit pissy for a moment and said someting like "you know you can tell me anything". So, I let him know (gently) that I have a stock answer for everyone since I don't know who I'll actually spend time with on a regular basis until it happens.

    I really don't understand where some customers come off calling us manipulative liars because we tell them what they want to hear. It's a fantasy not reality. It's not a f*ckin singles mixer. I'm not there to be your potential girlfriend, so I'll tell you whatever I see fit to. Get over it.
    I am lazy and I like to party


  22. #47
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    I say that I have a boyfriend and that we are on the fritz.It keeps a little distance between you and the customer,not so close that he thinks he can just ask you out,and yet not so far away that he won't spend any more money on you.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  23. #48
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest link=board=9;threadid=4152;start=msg148270#msg1482 70 date=1091497065
    I say that I have a boyfriend and that we are on the fritz.It keeps a little distance between you and the customer,not so close that he thinks he can just ask you out,and yet not so far away that he won't spend any more money on you.
    OTB LOL well that SS might work for the newbies but not for me LOL Hahahahha seriously I dont care if you have a BF or not. Money spent is related to your dancer skills. Most of the flockettes have SO's...I dont care. Hell, I counsel them on ways they can get their guys to straighten up So far Ive found 90% of them to be retards

    FBR

    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  24. #49
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    FBR,you are one of the very few that knows better.Not all guys are as enlightened as you.LOL,HAHA!!!
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

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  25. #50
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re:Should I say I'm single???

    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest link=board=9;threadid=4152;start=msg148295#msg1482 95 date=1091498478
    FBR,you are one of the very few that knows better.Not all guys are as enlightened as you.LOL,HAHA!!!
    OTB Im assuming you arent being a smart ass LOL Would you do that to me?? LOL

    Yes Ive been around the block many many times. I could PM you some good stories LOL But I think Ive reached the point where I understand the game. Actually I really love it...the flockettes and I joke about it all the time as they extract money from the PL's. Being a guy I should have empathy for those poor fuckers but damnnnn. They should read SCJ and get some insight LOL

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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