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Thread: advice on letting go of dancer

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    Default advice on letting go of dancer

    Ive been seeing the same dancer for months now. There was a time where she was not able to work due to some personal things. I found out somethings about her while she was away. I knew that she would be back to work last week thats when I last saw her. We talked about what was going on with her and I realized that she is a totally different person than who I had met and enjoyed spending time and money. To be honest, it was more of a dissappiontment tahn anything else. What is the best advice to stop seeing her? I care about her as a person, but I cant see her anymore. How can I let her go easy?


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    God/dess Zabrina's Avatar
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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    Just don't go to that club anymore.

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    If that's the only club around, explain your disappointment to her. If it's an addiction or extras issue, you're doing her a BIG favor. Other dancers who like you will respect you more.... It happened to me once, and I felt badly, but another dancer I liked sent me a thoughtful e-mail that made me feel better about it.

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    Just dont spend on her, chat up some others. I've done that recently and several dancers are already asking if I have a new favorite. Your money speaks volumes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chuck
    Remember HC, "NO" only means "NO" when she says it..... LMAO

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    That's is shocking youngsta, it sounds almost like she told you things she thought you'd want to hear to keep you spending money, nah a dancer wouldn't do that. I'm sure she will be heartbroken, but just cut her off cold turkey, it's for the best, and next time try not to believe everything you hear.

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    God/dess Lexi's Avatar
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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    I'd say just go when shes not there, or just talk to her and get dances from someone else. Remember, she doesnt own you, you can get dances from whoever you want.

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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    On topic:
    Simply tell her you are moving on and enjoyed the time together. It's time for someone new and let that be the end of it. Grow a pair man- you're PAYING for entertainment, not drama, BS and other nonsense.

    Off-topic:
    Is this the dancer you were so heavy for previously and posted about wanting to see exclusively, how much you liked, yadda yadda? How can she go from being this pinnacle of joy to someone you loathe and despise just by some personal information leaking out? If she was open enough to confess (whatever it was), what kind of reward for her honesty is just dumping her cold-turkey?

    Ya' might want to instead see if there is some way to just simply work around whatever it might have been. Since there is no hint concerning the issue, is it possible it wont effect the quality of your dances/visits? Whatever it was, it surely didnt effect your visits *before* you knew... so why should it after unless it's having some impact on her performance.
    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    I'm going to go with polecat on this one, but would like to add one more thing: Do yourself a favor and don't fish for/listen to personal information about the dancers you're interested in. If another dancer tries to offer it up, simply say, "I don't care to be a party to this conversation."

    It's nobody else's business to be spreading another's problems/issues/drama around a club. Besides, you go there for the fantasy, not reality, right?

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    Featured Member tragic-beauty's Avatar
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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    Quote Originally Posted by happy_camper link=board=8;threadid=6994;start=msg79312#msg79312 date=1078113502
    Just dont spend on her, chat up some others. I've done that recently and several dancers are already asking if I have a new favorite. Your money speaks volumes.
    that might cause some problems in the club... with fights ect, I think best thing todo is just come out with it and stop spending money on her.

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    First off, I wouldn't worry about letting her down easy. The painful truth is that most dancer's loyalty is where the money is (sorry laidies, this is from my experience).

    I had a similar experience. There was this one girl at the local club I used to make regular visits to see. We became friends, spoke and saw each other outside the club. She seemed genuinely interested in me, but that fell apart within the year.

    She became possesive and got pissed if I got a dance from another girl (even if it was a friend of hers). The shit hit the fan when she went down to Florida (I'm in NY) on vacation and ran into money problems. She called me up and asked me to wire down money to her to help her out. I didn't have the money (and wouldn't send it to her anyway). I have no problem giving a dancer money for dances, but you never "lend" them money because you never get it back.

    Long story short.... that was the last I heard from her. Word got around the club that we were on the outs and I had dancers lining up to be my new favorite.

    My advice.... find someone new and get over her. If she's at the club, it will piss her off seeing you with someone else and you don't care because you'll be having fun with another girl.

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    Quote Originally Posted by LouieJ link=board=8;threadid=6994;start=msg81374#msg81374 date=1078537835
    My advice.... find someone new and get over her. If she's at the club, it will piss her off seeing you with someone else and you don't care because you'll be having fun with another girl.
    And depending on why you can't do business anymore...you will love watching her squirm while the "big bucks" go to someone else. LOL.
    When the man says, "I do," it is the happiest day of her life.-Al Bundy

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    Maybe the girl has a very competitive nature and is a sore loser. I rarely keep regulars myself because I don't dance often enough to cultivate them. I have enjoyed regulars in the past but was happy to see them go. I don't think its ethical to gouge just one man for THAT much money by fooling him with the idea of sex and relationship. I want to leave my patrons happy and satisfied without feeling ripped off that they have spent 5k to graze my breast....

    I'll go with high turnover anyday. Let the other biatches fight over the fuckoes......

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

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    Default Re:advice on letting go of dancer

    If you care about the dancer as a person, and not just as a dancer, then you should approach her as a "friend" to relate your concerns. If you don't have a sense of strong relationship with her, then it's probably best to break away clean and get a new favorite.
    It's all mind over matter. If I don't mind, it doesn't matter.

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