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Thread: parents...

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    Newbie glamguitargirl's Avatar
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    Default parents...

    ok...so i've been thinking about being a stripper...for a year now. i'm moving out in may...and i was told i'd be hired at the vu. the only problem is my mom is really nosey...and she asks all sorts of details about where i work, when i work, what i do at work, etc. i was thinking about doing amateur night just to see if i'd be comfortable with stripping, in april...then if i'm thinking i'd like to do that, i'll go with it. so what should i say to my mom? she only lives a half hour away, and my family would definately come in to see me working (if i lied and said i was working at some restaurant- my original plan)...so i don't know what to do i guess. should i just say i got a job at bennigan's (restaurant i planned on saying i was working at)? i'm sure they'd come in to eat there, but i could always say i wasn't working...is this too risky? my mom will accept me no matter what, but i know she'd be severely dissapointed if she discovered what i was up to. are any of you in the same boat? any advice would be appreciated! thanks

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    Newbie burlesquegirl's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    If you feel you need to keep your job a secret, and don't want you family to attempt to visit you at a place you aren't actually working, then I would suggest telling your mother that you are doing telemarketing. Don't tell her you are working at Bennigan's, because inevitably your family would go there to eat, inquire after you, and get quite a shock when they find that not a single employee there knows who you are.

    Personally, I feel that you should be honest with your family, as long as it won't lead to a major falling out. However, there is no point in mentioning it and getting into a feud until you've tried stripping for awhile, and decide whether it's something that you really want to do.

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    Veteran Member MotherDaisy's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    Learn to LIE???

    My parents are open minded, but I would rather not answer their inquiries or let it slip to the grandparents.

    I don't live with them though!! Get a place of your own before you begin to strip on a regular basis.

    Telemarketing..that sounds genius and you can tell them you get paid like 15 dollars an hour. Be really non-specific when they ask where your workplace is located.

    Only problem is if they do your taxes, you might have to tell them. If you are seen by friends of the family it could be a potential disaster. Get ready for that day to come cause it will.
    Those who bring sunshine into lives of others, cannot keep it from themselves.

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    How about telling them that you are waitressing at the strip club. Tell them that it pays a lot better than Bennigan's. That way they won't try to come see you at work and you can sort of ease them into the idea of stripping.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Default Re:parents...

    I'd agree with Destiny and tell them that you waitress a the strip club and let them get used to that idea first. You'd have to tell them eventually though. God forbid something horrible happened to you and they had to find out that way.

    What club were you thinking of going to? I saw on your profile that you're in MI, I'm over at the Ypsi Vu. Have you considered waitressing first? It would give you a good feel of the club, and how things run.

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    Featured Member NikkiD's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    I used to tell my ultra conservative parents that I waitressed in a gay bar. I knew that they would never come in there, nor would they question it.
    However, as I got older, I realized that I am too old to lie to my parents about something so petty, because I am an adult and they will just have to learn to respect my life choices. It rocked the boat for a little bit, but then they came around, what else could
    they do?


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    Veteran Member Nina77's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    I recently told my mom- I felt silly being 22 hiding something from my parents. So I just came out and said "You know I've been dancing right?" and she goes "I KNEW IT!" then runs to my brother and says "I was right!" Then she got all sad and gave me the disappointment speech, but I explained to her why I gotta do what I gotta do, and she accepts me. She doesn't like it, but there's nothing she can do about it.

    I would definitly go w/ the waitress at the club idea. That way you know they wont visit- and it'll warm them up to the truth. At first I told my mom I was a waitress... but she knew better.

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    Senior Member jennworthington's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    I was honest from the get go.........I waited for the explosion, but none came,,,,,,,I dont regret it. It's been thirteen years now and my job is the family joke. I felt better knowing I was honest, and they love me, so it was cool. Mom gave me a speech, but it was just a fgormality
    No matter what they teach you, what you believe is true......

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    Well, if you are going to use telemarketing as your "job" then tell them that you earn commission. Since telemarketing is not an "hourly"job. That way, when you are making a lot of money...or making very little money...then you have a reason for it...as commission is only paid to you when you earn it. But, whatever you say, do NOT say that you are making a certain amount per hour.

    I was straight up with my mom...she was kinda concerned at first, but she accepted it and even supports me in it. I like that my mom doesn't always agree with my decisions, but she will always support me none-the-less. But, to each their own and you need to do what you feel is best for you.

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    Veteran Member A.n.a.l.a.'s Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    well if you have cool parents then just be up front. my folks basically suck and don't approve of most of what i do or want to do if i told them. so i mention things to other folks that i know won't tell my folks. my mom would much rather me struggle for 30-4o hrs./ week and a barely minimum wage job than work a couple nights a week at a bar or club.

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    Newbie glamguitargirl's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    thanks for all the advice everyone! i'm going to do amateur night in a couple of weeks, and i'm also turning in an application at bennigan's...i can always start working there, then once school starts, i can change jobs...that way i'll have myself established and i won't be home at all, so no one will know. eventually they will though...i duno, i'll figure it out. the advice REALLY has helped. just knowing you girls are in, or have been in, the same boat as me is extremely comforting.

    mackenzie, i actually went to the vu in ypsi, but that was back in december. i'll have to come back and see you sometime! last time, i went with 2 guys, you might have been working while i was there. the dj and some other girls there kept telling me i should dance there and come back for amateur night. you prolly don't remember, but i was the blondie. anyways, the vu i went to, to ask about getting hired, was the one in saginaw. that's the one that's closest to me. i go to cmu, so it's the most convenient. it's either that or lansing.

    anyways, thanks again

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    Newbie sammy's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    to be honest,i havent told my parents what i do and its only because they will worry.here in new zealand people are still quite closed minded about the industry.


    The best advice i feel i could give you is tell your mom.but dont just tell her.take her into the club when your not working so she can see that strip clubs aren't like they used to be.if the club is classy i wouldn't worry about doing this.if your mum has any concerns about where you work or what you do they should be extinguished when she sees the club.

    this has worked for me with my friends,ive taken them to where i work and they realise its not cliche seedy and gross like most movies portray its actually a classy place where women "entertain" rather than "take their clothes off for a bunch of seedy old men".granted there are seedy old men but theres also a wider group of people possibly similar to your mum in age.


    Good luck

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    Default Re:parents...

    Quote Originally Posted by Destiny link=board=25;threadid=7567;start=msg86940#msg8694 0 date=1079929775
    How about telling them that you are waitressing at the strip club. Tell them that it pays a lot better than Bennigan's. That way they won't try to come see you at work and you can sort of ease them into the idea of stripping.
    Since I knew from a previous conversation about Bucks and Hens Parties that my step-mum isn't kewl about strippers and my dad doesn't like them either... well.. I knew that if I told them.. my dad would die (figuratively speaking, of course).

    I had a bf for 3-4 years and a year into that relationship I was talking about sex (for some reason) with my step-mum and said "Yes.. I have been sleeping with him for year now".. my Dad was coming into that conversation and had to have a seat LOL!

    Since I know that they dis-approve of strippers (probably thru mis-information)... I decided to go the 'waitress in a strip club' route. I can easily cover my arse as I generally know what is involved in being a drinks waitress at my club and since it is a strip club.. I have convinced my parents that I am pulling in some big tips some nights/shifts.

    Otherwise, say telemarketing. If she asks where.. say that they have three offices and you are moved around them as each covers a different 'department' as such.


    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    Veteran Member Jillian's Avatar
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    Default Re:parents...

    hey....

    Well a few things....

    I like the telemarketing idea. That way the family really couldn't come "watch" you in action...I have heard of some parents of waitresses want to make sure their daughter wasn't stripping and coming in to check out what she did in the club...odd...

    I used to waitress at the vu in lansing...didn't like it so much, but whatever...that was the first job in my life that I actually quit. If you're gonna waitress...I dunno, I'd skip the vu if you decide to waitress first, because no alcohol and drinks are free there, so guys (esp the young ones) don't tip. You do make 6.00/hr plus tips, I made much more flirting my ass off at a regular night club that serves alcohol then I did at the vu. I guess waitressing there would just get your foot in the door if you are serious about dancing. I actually am at msu...so if ya need info on other clubs in the lansing area, or if ya want me to come help cheer ya on for amatuer night let me know!


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