Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 27

Thread: "did i do something wrong???"

  1. #1
    mermaidnz
    Guest

    Default "did i do something wrong???"

    senario,

    im jokingly going thru my bfs msn list asking who everyone is on it ( we always do this)

    and we get to this name and he says " oh shes this stripper in BLAH ( not too far from where i live atm)" i got interested, "so how long you known her, how did you meet,when did you last talk etc"

    apparently, they speak every few months, never met, and shes a random off the internet.

    so im like ( in front of him )
    " ok delete?!"
    and deleted her.

    he got shitty, as you would i spose.


    but if she was nothign to him, and he didnt even know her, or anything like that, why would he care so much about if she was in his contact list?? i mean, if they are that great friends, she will msn him at some stage.


    i must add, we live together and SHARE our laptop, so yeah, i wasnt snooping, i was doing it in front of him


    but why would her get shitty about deleting someone he has no interest in??????

    maybe im just the biggest bitch, but i dont see tooooooo much wrong with it. i mean if they really are mates, then she will get in touch with him right???

    uh ohhhh my bad?!

  2. #2
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I'm thinking he saw that as a jealous bitch move on your part. But it is also possible there is something he's not telling you. Just drop the issue with him, as continuing on it will only make matters worse. But I'd also keep my eyes and ears open for other 'signals'. Just in case.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  3. #3
    Guest

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    mermaidnz,

    Try this:
    Delete your entire MSN contact list, you don't actually need it. If the people on it are really your mates, they will contact you. If they don't, then why did you have them on your list in the first place.

    If this doesn't sound right, then you know what you did.

    -V

  4. #4
    mermaidnz
    Guest

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    vin. thats exactly what i DO!!!!!!!!

    if i dont speak to anyone in one month ( for no good reason , like if they go on holiday for 2 months or soemthing, thats different) but if no decent reason fornat talking, i delete them.

    same with cell phone numbers.

    lol it probably did seem jelous, but he was sitting next to me...never said no when i asked about deleting it. i guess he didnt think i would. lol and it seemed weird why he got shitty i deleted some random stripper he "has never met", i could understand if it was one of his actual FRIENDS. he has heaps of chicks on msn i dont care about....

    lol i dont get it??

  5. #5
    Guest

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Quote Originally Posted by mermaidnz link=board=1;threadid=8092;start=msg93884#msg93884 date=1081427866
    if i dont speak to anyone in one month ( for no good reason , like if they go on holiday for 2 months or soemthing, thats different) but if no decent reason fornat talking, i delete them.
    The difference here is that the pattern is that they don't talk for a few months at a time. That's a fine reason for not hearing from them in the last month.

    Not everyone needs to keep in constant contact with everyone they know.

    Quote Originally Posted by mermaidnz link=board=1;threadid=8092;start=msg93884#msg93884 date=1081427866
    lol i dont get it??
    Yeah, you don't. A simple rule while living together is "If it isn't mine, and it isn't in my way, leave it alone."

  6. #6
    mermaidnz
    Guest

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    but if she is noone to him, why should it matter if i deleted her?? she'll come and message him when she wants to if they are that good a friends right??? so it shouldnt matter

  7. #7
    Veteran Member NVJosh's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Lovely Las Vegas, Nevada
    Posts
    665
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    It was invading his personal space. That was a decision he should have made, not you. It may have appeared as a jealousy move to him, however I think the bigger issue is that you took it on yourself to decide she didn't belong on his list. He said they talk every couple of months, but maybe the last time they talked was last week. I don't know if you have regulars who give you phone numbers, but what if he started deleting their numbers from your cell phone? Maybe you hadn't called them in a while, however you still wanted their number there just in case you ever had a really slow day. Wouldn't you be pissed?

  8. #8
    Featured Member Chili Palmer's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Location
    In the locker room, but I don't see you here
    Posts
    1,247
    Thanks
    95
    Thanked 475 Times in 164 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I've made some amazingly close friends over 'net--male and female--and I'll never meet any of them. From Germany, Italy, Colorado, NJ, some even near me in LA...a very, very bad move on your part...suck it up and apologize to him.

    CP

  9. #9
    Featured Member ami's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Location
    midwest
    Posts
    1,074
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I would just be irritated that someone touched my list, and changed it to something that I didnt do. it wouldnt matter if it was some random person who contacted me one time three years ago. but then I am just picky like that.........

  10. #10
    Member S4L's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2004
    Location
    ontario
    Posts
    65
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I'm with Ami. I have a lot of old emails and contacts and I would be pissed if I was told to delete them. That said, I also see where you are coming from.

    Dean
    "I was in the tanning bed and I sneezed and banged my head on the lid " JN

  11. #11
    Senior Member Pixie's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    187
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I definitely think that it's not your altering his buddy list that bothers him, but the jealousy and cattiness inherent in your action (his point of view). You said that he has other MSN girls you don't care about--why this one? So he only talks to her every now and then--if that makes him happy, why should it upset you? It seems like you've fallen into the trap that non-dancing women do: assuming that because a woman is a stripper, she can't be a good platonic friend, that there has to be prurient interest on the part of the man.

    I think you should apologize to him. It's not your right to mess with his stuff. Even if he didn't say "no" when you asked if you could delete her, he didn't say "yes" either.

  12. #12
    Featured Member CrescentLuna's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Upstate NY
    Posts
    1,146
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I would be irritated if my boyfriend did that, or anyone else. There are people on my list I haven't talked to in years, but might want to catch up with. If my bf said "do you care if I delete them?" I would probably say "yes" but then again might shrug or something, then later be like "waitaminute, why did you do that??" but my bf wouldn't ask because it isn't his list. Also you seem to be getting worked up over the fact the other girl is a stripper - I don't see why.
    also, you don't have to speak often or have met someone in person to have them mean something.
    "I still have my name
    I still have my face
    I have not run away from home
    Doesn't seem so long
    If I now embrace
    Every single thing I've never known"

  13. #13
    Featured Member tragic-beauty's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2002
    Location
    KC
    Posts
    1,150
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I say drop it.. get trillian where it loggs all the chats but does tell him that it does.. and that way if you suspect somthing look at his logs and put your thoughts to rest.. but dont go off the wall about a little flirting.

  14. #14
    God/dess RoseDelight's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Location
    LA
    Posts
    2,982
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Hmm.

    If you trust him, I wouldn't worry too much about it...Because this could seriously keep you up, day and night worried about this. To Him, I am sure it seems bad on your part...Jealousy/catty/mistrust, etc.

    I understand getting worried, and what not. (I've been there)...But if he's going to do something behind your back, I doubt a little msn name is going to matter. I hope he never does...But if he is that way, You should look beyond a mere msn name.

    It's his list. I think I'd be annoyed with it as well...

    Good luck!





    --Georg Christoph Litchenberg



  15. #15
    Featured Member SCGirl's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    783
    Thanks
    4
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I'm with Tragic. I have "Dead" AIM and it logs all of my IMs until I delete them. If you're really worried, check out his convos. BUT be careful in doing this....if you find something and confront him, he'll know you were snooping and he won't trust you again.

    I think he's just pissed that you deleted one of HIS friends....especially a "stripper" friend. I'd be pissed just because it's MY friend and you don't have the right to tell me who to talk to. Just try to look at it from his point of view.

    Good luck honey.
    "You did then what you knew how to do; when you knew better, you did better" ~Maya Angelou

  16. #16
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2003
    Posts
    13,855
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Wow, your act was very immature, just by going through his MSN list alone, even in his company. Don't you two understand personal privacy?

    Its smart to keep emails, numbers, business cards, etc, one day you will need them. For instance, I am starting a business, and many of my contacts over the years are helping me out with services. As well, they are potential partners and customers (not stripping) and its better than cold calling. But you are very, very smart, I am sure that you memorize everyone's information as soon as you read it, Madame 94% percentile walking calculator...

    Puke, if my boy invaded my privacy like that, he would have one less scrote....

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  17. #17
    Senior Member Intellex's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Sunny SoCal!
    Posts
    152
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Not very cool...I would be less than impressed.

  18. #18
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Home
    Posts
    13,598
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 28 Times in 23 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I think what you did was insulting. It was very immature. It doesn't matter that you don't understand his feelings about what you did. The fact is that he got pissed...so, don't do it again. That's really all there is to it...and apologize for your lack of respect for his privacy and property.

  19. #19
    Senior Member Freedom's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    82
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    I don't think you did anything wrong ! Who does this guy think he is talking to another female ??!!!
    Next time delete all of his contacts..when you're finished with that then move on to his cell phone and delete all of those numbers too !
    That will really show a guy who is in control !

    Where would he be with out you !

    A big thumbs up to all of the controlling, insecure girls out there.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Intellex's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Sunny SoCal!
    Posts
    152
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Quote Originally Posted by Freedom link=board=1;threadid=8092;start=msg94104#msg94104 date=1081461280
    I don't think you did anything wrong ! Who does this guy think he is talking to another female ??!!!
    Next time delete all of his contacts..when you're finished with that then move on to his cell phone and delete all of those numbers too !
    That will really show a guy who is in control !

    Where would he be with out you !

    A big thumbs up to all of the controlling, insecure girls out there.
    haha..nice Freedom, that pretty much sums it up.

  21. #21
    Veteran Member carmenNYC's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Manhattan
    Posts
    530
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    okay okay okay so you looked through his contacts jokingly at first and then found something you thought was suspicious. i've heard of girlfriends doing all kinds of other crazy shit to check up on their boyfriends, and (with reasonable cause) i've admittedly done some of them myself. then i realized if i didnt trust the guy i should not be with him in the first place.

    not really that big of a deal! put yourself in his place. you wouldnt be too pleased either. but whatever! just dont do it again.

  22. #22
    Veteran Member NVJosh's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Lovely Las Vegas, Nevada
    Posts
    665
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Maybe he was pissed because the other dancer was Russian and promised him extras if he ever visited her?

    th: : :smiley: :wink: :cheesy: :rolleyes:

    I kid...I kid!

  23. #23
    Member canuck's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2003
    Location
    canada
    Posts
    60
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    LMAO

    BAD bad bird josh (just kidding and still laughing )

    Ok lets not start that all over again ( still smiling)

    Kat and Freedom Catty and a dare I say a bit sarcastic but right on the mark too.

    Mermaid, I think you probably crossed some line of his personal space. More likely than not it was just an innocent situation, but if it was done to me I would be unimpressed also.


  24. #24
    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2002
    Location
    NY Capital District
    Posts
    3,775
    Thanks
    758
    Thanked 1,943 Times in 696 Posts
    My Mood
    Cynical

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    My guess is she was a pseudo online buddy/acquaintance, and he said she means "nothing" instead of "a teeny tiny bit" to avoid the "insecure jealous" reaction.

    He's also probably worried about other things you may decide to "delete" in the future. An old sweatshirt he likes but has holes in it? etc. etc.

    It's a shared laptop...so I know not the same thing...but anyone touches ONE setting on my computer and it's go time. (Then again, I'm a hopless computer-junkie).

    -lestatdl1
    p.s. oh yeah and all the invasion of privacy stuff and not respecting his property/boundaries/wishes/etc.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

  25. #25
    God/dess Lexi's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Jerz
    Posts
    6,117
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:"did i do something wrong???"

    Quote Originally Posted by SCGirl link=board=1;threadid=8092;start=msg93974#msg93974 date=1081443944
    I'm with Tragic. I have "Dead" AIM and it logs all of my IMs until I delete them. If you're really worried, check out his convos. BUT be careful in doing this....if you find something and confront him, he'll know you were snooping and he won't trust you again.

    Good luck honey.
    SC Girl, what is "Dead" AIM?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. "Hun," "Baby," "Darlin'" and other endearing terms
    By Chicagoeditor in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 74
    Last Post: 10-29-2013, 04:02 PM
  2. Club "Funny Money"- Tolerable or Royal "pita"?
    By minnow in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 05-28-2013, 08:25 AM
  3. Replies: 6
    Last Post: 01-24-2012, 05:34 PM
  4. Replies: 26
    Last Post: 07-30-2008, 03:32 PM
  5. The terms "mojo" and "nation sack" in blues music
    By PhaedrusZ in forum Music Mix
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 02-29-2008, 08:00 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •