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Thread: Question for guys being approached

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    Default Question for guys being approached

    I was wondering becuase customers on this board seem to say they value personality first then looks when decideing to get a dance I was wondering how they would rather be approached. Big smile, friendly voice and body language, lighthearted attitude or seductive, slutty, sexy and giving you fuck-me-eyes?

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    Veteran Member bibacle's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    As one of those who likes "personality" first...

    I like sincere eye contact, smile, and gentle, friendly approach. :smiley: I don't like the slutty, fuck-me approach. This is a girlfriend fantasy for me, not a whorehouse.

    I also absolutely will not spend time or $$ with the women who just do the room with the "wanna dance?" sounding like they just don't care.
    "Those who dance, are considered crazy by those who can't hear the music."--George Carlin

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    Senior Member Flounder's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I would go with your big smile, friendly voice and body language, lighthearted attitude. I like a girl who looks like she is having fun and enjoying herself. Save the sexy sluttly look for the third or forth dance to change things up, hehe.

    I totally agree with Cookie Monster in that the girl who just goes around asking "wanna dance" will get zero money from me. I flat out can't stand this. My other pet peeve is the dancer who has a big smile and asked a guy for company or a dance and he says no and the girl turns around and gives some total negative face. Makes me think what a fake smile you had a second ago. I want the girl who turns around, laughs and smiles right up to the next guy.

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    Featured Member Chili Palmer's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    It's funny...I've never minded the "Wanna dance?" approach. When entering a club with no local knowledge of the dancers, my main priority is finding my body type; everything else is secondary.

    I will say this, don't approach me from behind, like you're in stealth dancer mode. Coming at me from behind and kind of masking your body from my view is a huge red flag to me, and I'll automatically default into "no" mode.

    I've always considered it disingenuous for guys to say they are looking for personality over looks/body when they are going to a strip club. It's right up with women who always say they are looking "for a guy who makes me laugh" when in fact they want the hunk, the bad boy, the sugar daddy, etc. Making you laugh may be nice down the road, but the ain't the reason you come back for more.

    No surprise, if you follow my posts, that first body, then mileage and finally personality are my priorities. I'm honest when I say I don't come to strip clubs to talk. I come to spend money and get my lap on. Period.

    CP

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I hear ya CP on the looks, think its just a slight misunderstanding. I guess I have a very broad group of ladies looks that I find attractive, I pick from this group first, then from this group personality matters most. In most clubs this seems like 60-80% of the ladies for me.

    As far as looks only, hell no, a perfect 10 girl with no personality or just plain negative will get no dances from me, I don't care how hot she is. Milage is a non factor in houston as most places are high contact and unless you are looking for extras there are all close to the same in that area.

    I go to strip clubs for different reasons, talking, drinking, hanging out, stress relief, getting dances and just having fun.

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    First, to answer the question, I like the straight approach. A smile, fun attitude and a sharp wit is what I like best.

    Re: the priority issue - looks are definitely important, because that's what we notice first. Looks will get a dance, but it's personality that ensures further dances.

    If I see a new face, I also wait and watch before I'll get a dance. Case in point, there's a lady that I think is super attractive at the club, but after watching her for part of an evening, see appeared quite aloof and willing to just go through the motions. This pretty much kills the likelihood of me purchasing a dance.

    Mileage? What's that?


    -afx

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Hello everyone, this is my first post here.

    Personally, I'll agree with Chili. I automatically say no when a dancer approaches me from behind and asks for a dance. I don't go to clubs a ton, but I know enough to be patient. It's a just reflex.

    I go to strips to see hot girls primarily. Personality is second, but I'd say a crappy personality or attitude will veto a dance. Socializing is nice and just natural, but the 'fun' factor is the main reason I go. As a matter of fact, I feel very bad when a girl, with a great personality, sits and invests time to be friendly BUT I'm not attracted to her and really don't want a dance. I really don't know what to do. Typically I try to pass a hint and be a bit distant. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. Once I said I was waiting for a girl, but then was grilled on who. Lesson, don't lie. Now if the dancer is really selling, I'm just Mr. Politically Correct and just say you're gorgeous (even if they're not) and out of respect for your time, I'm going to hang out for a bit.

    Here's a question for the ladies: If we're not interested in a dance from you, how do you like to be told no.

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    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    With me, personality always came first, because there have been pretty much few dancers who I didn't think were attractive (I am blessed with rather egalitarian, broad tastes in women in terms of what I find attractive). If I am going to spend money on you beyond tipping at the stage, I want to at least feel it is going to be fun and that a dancer is not simply sucking money out of me. An attractive dancer with no personality made for an unsatisfying time for me.

    I don’t think, though, you will find a majority consensus on this. I personally think there are many men who care only about what you look like, not whatever personality traits you show. I also think there are just as many who want to experience a fun, non-robotic personality, and will go for that regardless if he initially was attracted to the dancer or not.

    In the bar/restaurant business they preach "Read Your Customers". By doing that, through at least a modicum of interaction, you can get at least a solid guesstimate on what could work on a person. I am a sarcastic goofball when I work, and often play at insulting many of my regulars (saying "Wow.. they will let ANYONE in here" will get a big laugh from the right person). BUT...I can read what a person would be like within a few moments, and would adjust my demeanor accordingly. Tailoring my approach to each customer nets me more money then if I was the same to everyone.

    Doing all this as a dancer may require a little bit of legwork (No pun intended), but in the long run could make you more money, and could help build up a regular base.

    If any of this helps, PM me in the future and let me know.

    PJ

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    Featured Member FONDL's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I'm a sucker for a big smile. Forget the slutty approach. I like cute and friendly. Eye contact. Sincere. Playful. A little naughty. I once wrote a poem about my ATF that included the lines "An angel on a pedestal, the devil in disguise, I was never really sure, both lurked deep within her eyes." Do that and I'm yours.
    Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    The walk-from-behind approach is always a bad idea. Many girls are taught to do this because if they get turned down by one customer, the customer in front of them may not know it so when they approach from behind, it guises that fact. This is mostly true for the "wanna dance" girls who drive me absolutely bonkers. If I'm ever in a club talking with management and a dancer does that to me, I give her my business card and usually tell her that she needs to contact me because she's never going to succeed in this business. One of the things that we teach is if you do have to approach a customer from behind for various logistical reasons, there are better ways to do it. Generally speaking though, it makes the situation uncomfortable and is not a very good way to approach customers. It does make it seem as though the dancer is hiding something.

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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Quote Originally Posted by Chili Palmer link=board=8;threadid=8231;start=msg96361#msg96361 date=1081883860
    I've always considered it disingenuous for guys to say they are looking for personality over looks/body when they are going to a strip club.
    You'd be surprised how genuine that answer is though. You'd also be surprised how many guys go into clubs, pay tons of money to take a dancer into the VIP room only for her to never take an article of clothes off. Dancers are like bartenders in much the same way that they serve two purposes...one to do the job in which they are titled and the other to be a therapist. I'm always reminded of a girl down here in Vegas who is a good friend of a friend. She's the kind of girl who looks and dresses in a way so as when she goes anywhere, head turn and guys drool. She's just as smart as she is hot too. I believe she was on the Deans list at UNLV for several years. (not that this means much I suppose. My dog can get a 4.0 GPA from UNLV, but you get the point). That being said, the second she opened her mouth, out came a heavy New York accent with the most foul mouth you've ever heard. Every other word from this girl was a 4-letter one and you'd be amazed at how often guys were overly repullsed by this girl. Looks go a long way, especially when going into a gentlemens club, but ultimately it is personality that is going to turn one $20 dance on the floor into an hour in the VIP or Champagne room.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Veteran Member Santos's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I've always considered it disingenuous for guys to say they are looking for personality over looks/body when they are going to a strip club.
    I don’t think we are being disingenuous at all. In high-end strip clubs, the majority of the woman will be on the “attractive” end of the scale. So meeting a nice looking dancer isn’t that much of an issue.

    And many of the guys who post here are mature and realize that a woman can be sexy and attractive without being the cookie cutter image of Pam Anderson. I’m not saying I would spend top dollar on an overweight, unattractive stripper with a great personality, but I know I won’t spend money on a drop-dead gorgeous dancer with a bad personality—and most strip clubs have far too many of this type.

    I go to clubs to have fun, to have a few drinks and to laugh it up with a dancer or dancers. The purring sex-kitten approach just doesn’t work for me, mostly because it almost always comes off as phony. I prefer a genuine smile and a carefree attitude when I’m approached.

    And I have to agree with DW’s comments. I think she hit the nail on the head.

    But this is just one man’s opinion. Every guy is different, but I do believe that a sincere, outgoing and genuinely friendly attitude can translate into real dollars.

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Quote Originally Posted by Santos link=board=8;threadid=8231;start=msg97036#msg97036 date=1081981305

    And I have to agree with DW?s comments. I think she hit the nail on the head.
    Thank you for the kind words, but I'm a "he". What you said is also right though. In the high-end clubs, or even many smaller ones, finding a beautiful woman to sit next to you is hardly difficult. They need to have a little bit more than just beauty.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Veteran Member Santos's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Thank you for the kind words, but I'm a "he".
    Whoops, sorry about that, I just assumed you were female :o

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I'd go even further. For me a gorgeous girl who doesn't smile is a big turnoff, she might as well be wearing a sign that says "major attitude." I'll avoid her like the plague. Give me the average looking girl whose smile lights up the room.
    Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)

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    Veteran Member livenudegirlsunite's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Chili - I wish more customers were like you.

    Fondl - The reason for the "attitude" is because so many guys don't show us the repsect that we deserve by being upfront and by simply saying I'm not interested in buying a dance within the first few seconds after we approach.

    Abstract - You are on the right track to being a great customer. All you have to do is say I'm not interested in buying a dance and I don't want to waste your time. Say it right off the bat. That is something that all strippers totally appreciate. We hate it when guys encourage us to sit down and keep them entertained without compensation. We have to pay way more than the guys do just to get out on the floor and have the oportunity to sell dances. We can't afford to "hang out" with out compensation.

    We are not desparate beggars or liscenced psychiatrists - we are stippers. We do lap dances. We don't do psychotherapy sessions or $20 crack ho bj's. Please accept and respect us for who we are and what we do.

    By the way, next time you go to a club and see a lady that you find attractive, but she looks like she has a bad attitude- pull out a $20 bill and tell her that you want a lap dance. I garuntee that you will see a big smile come over her face immediately.
    Same goes for stage - pull out 10 $1's and shower them on the stage. Watch the change in attitude. You will get excellent results every time GARUNTEED!
    Most people prefer to believe their leaders are just and fair even in the face of evidence to the contrary, because once a citizen acknowledges that the government under which they live is lying and corrupt, the citizen has to choose what he or she will do about it. - M Rivero

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    God/dess Malibu's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    That's good info. Keep it up chaps!

    To Abstract - If a customer does not want to dance with me, then just a polite and friendly ''no, thank you'' will do. This is straight-up and you won't get hassled from me again, although I may just pass by and say ''hey'' once in a while. Don't give me the ''You're too beautiful'' thing at a weak attempt to massage my ego. My ego is the right size already. If you say ''come back later'' with NO INTENTION of wanting to see me again or say anything along the lines of ''only if you give me something 'extra' '', I will blacklist you and will warn my friends in the club not to approach you. These are my (and many others) pet hates.

    (Without meaning to sound harsh however )
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    That's the problem Malibu. Many girls are as business-like as you. I don't go to clubs necessarily to be chatted up. Your approach is best, IMO, but some dancer find the short curt answer rude. Many girls don't have the level of self esteem you seem to have.

    I would bet every guy here can attest to the common practice by some dancers sitting down in the chair next to you, without asking if you want a dance, or even after you politely decline and attempting to work a dance from you. They sometimes are so polite to introduce themselves. Or they immediately sit on your lap or they start to touch your hand or knee. I'm not sure exactly what the design is, but I think it's either by investing time with you, you're then guilted or obligated to buy.

    It's quite annoying, especially when it's so loud you have to lean over to have conversation with someone you have no desire to have a dance with or have a conversation with. I'm not trying to be an A-hole. Point is, I'm a pretty picky consumer and know in a half of second if you're my physical type and if I want a dance. The only other thing on my mind is if there's someone else in the club who I might like better. Otherwise, I know pretty damn quick.

    But, that is me. I know lots of guys look for conversation.

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Big smile, friendly voice and body language, lighthearted attitude and then the I'd-only-do-it-with-you eyes.


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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    You forgot hotel keys.

    Just kidding.

    Face first, eye contact, be nice, then slim and away we go!

    >>>Sad<<<


    Had to edit, sorry!

    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    These answers surprise me, mostly because the "friendly" approach always fails me, but as soon as I turn on the "Super Slut" persona and shove my ass in guys&#039; laps, I bank!

    Maybe "slutty" works better for some girls than others!
    Love,

    Asphyxia

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I see what you mean Abstract. One thing I learned was to take a &#039;&#039;no&#039;&#039; answer as part of being a good dancer. I would sit with a man, and sometimes he would just say he was waiting for someone or was not interested yet. I&#039;d just smile and say to him to have a good evening (even though after getting turned down a good few times would give me a frown inside ). And you know what? I would sometimes bank from those SAME customers later. But it happens when girls are in competition and are all like &#039;&#039;I&#039;m gonna MAKE him dance with me, even if he doesn&#039;t think so or want to&#039;&#039;, it puts customers off (and besides, that kind of aggressiveness is not really in my nature).

    But if you really want to avoid certain girls and you see a girl you like, have her sent over to sit with you, or approach her and it&#039;ll keep those you don&#039;t want to approach you away.
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    Featured Member FONDL's Avatar
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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    One other thing you might want to consider. Guys are likely to treat you as the person you present yourself to be. Big friendly smile and friendly girl-next-door attitude might bring a very different customer behavior in private than the super slut approach. It&#039;s not a good idea to lead the customer to think he&#039;s going to get more than you intend to give. But the other way around - giving more than expected - may result in multiple dances.
    Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)

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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    Hmm, I don&#039;t go to SCs very often (maybe once every 2-3 years), but if I go (and woot I&#039;m going to a LV this week for some fun!), well, eyes say a lot to me, so I am going to go with the fuck-me-eyes Maybe guys that go regularly are looking for personality, but I don&#039;t go to the clubs to make a friend, or to talk, and I am not going because I&#039;m a loner. Nor am I going to get my rocks off. If I go it is to escape for a few hours. To enjoy the fantasy of being seduced for a few hours with no risks, no hassles, nothing else on my mind. And I don&#039;t care what some guys thing, I think if you go to a club the men should look and dress the part. Dress up, be immaculately groomed, take lots of money, and treat the ladies you would treat a lover. In the end the men get a better fantasy out of it.




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    Default Re:Question for guys being approached

    I like girls that are friendly and sexy. I hate the "you want a dance" line without even introducing themselves. A little light conversation and then ask about a dance works most times with me.
    I also had one lady order a drink without asking me and just assumed that I would pay. I didn&#039;t.

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