




When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





Is Johnny Depp now in Pearl Jam?
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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.









We dont have diners in the UK, only Cafes and they dont have pies like yours!
Im gonna save the pie/cake and do come yummy research![]()
A civilian spends money to look good
A stripper looks good to make money
A civilian may be after your wage
A stripper laughs at your wage







When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.



This made me fucking cry.
I apologize for the size though, can't figure out how to make it smaller.
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That's amazing.





The best thing i have heard in a strip club to date:
customer: we should get married right now! we should get a shotgun marriage!
me: uhh... i think you are misunderstanding what a shotgun marriage means. A shotgun marriage means you knock me up and my daddy shows up at your door with a gun and forces you to marry me and raise the baby. You mean elope.
customer: hmm... nah actually i will take the shotgun marriage. At least then we would be having sex.




oh my god! THANK YOU THANK YOU
These days I like to count my money. I like to wash it delicately and iron it. Sometimes I dry it with some bounty to make it all nice and cuddly. I love my money... did I say that out loud?



God damn that is incredible.
-E
hilarious signature





How colleagues see each other in the workplace...
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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





Epic recovery...
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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.
^ that can't be real!





When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





How to get out of a ridiculous parking ticket...
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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.





Google Map FAIL!
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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.









When life gives you lemons, make lemonade... then find someone whose life gave them vodka, and have a party.
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