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Thread: Starting a relationship?

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    Default Starting a relationship?

    Hi, I have been reading the forum, but i dont remmber of any posts i have done or not?
    I met a gal 2 month ago 2 years older than me (i am naive didnt have many GFs) and she is a stripper i care for her and try to be supportive
    i have read many posts like (changed perception towards men!)
    is this just a catty talk or is this the view that many strippers have?
    we havent met in the club (actually never been in 1) . I know complete trust dosnt build in two months. now i am curious to find out two things:
    1-i am a good spender and suppoter how can i tell if she is play (gold digger) or she likes me?
    2- i wanna know about the way she may look at me (lika dog?) i am not looking for what said prize in the pants but i want that sex should be part the what we are going through (with the growh of the relationship)?

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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    and besides, i remmeber some1 named Pamela on the forum, that i dont see her posts now, has she left? just to say i enjoyed reading her posts.

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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    Take what you read here with a grain of salt. For every dancer that is single and is down on men, there is at least one that is happily involved in a loving, trusting relationship with one. Of course, you won't hear about that on a thread about changed perception towards men.

    How can you tell if she's gold digging? Well, here's a little thing about me and a lot of women (not just strippers.) We look for men who have money, but we are not gold diggers. We like to be wooed and spoiled and we look for guys who can afford to do that. Since dancers make more than your average woman, this is even more so. Plus I am ultimately sizing my guy up for husband potential, and being a good provider goes a long way. So relax....just because a girl is into a guy with money, it doesn't mean that's all she wants from him.

    And if she's having sex with you, you are probably not a dog in her eyes.

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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    Emily:
    We like to be wooed and spoiled and we look for guys who can afford to do that. Since
    dancers make more than your average woman, this is even more so.

    u r right, but is it just not ok to like it to see she is doing the what i do for her! know what i mean (i dont mean she has to woo and spoil me in exchange)

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    I have no idea what you mean.

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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    There are plenty of good girls capable of being in healthy relationship who just happen to dance.

    I always say trust your gut. You are the only one who knows what kind of relationship the two of you share.

    If you suspect she is a gold digger then quit spending money on her for a couple weeks and just do fun, free things. If you two are happy together and have fun then you have nothing to worry about.
    Those who bring sunshine into lives of others, cannot keep it from themselves.

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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    I agree with Emily on this one. We all like nice things, men and women alike, otherwise we would have no motivation to go the extra mile to attain them. Interestingly enough I had a debate with a dancer in the last club I was in, she claimed to be in favor of equal distribution of wealth. To make a long story short, the debate ended quickly when I asked her if she wanted a person who flipped burgers for a living to make the same money as she did. Her next response was, "I guess I never looked at it that way." Mine was, "Imagine how much the burger would cost?" Anyway, as far as the gold digger thing goes, you should ask yourself if you have this concern based on what this woman does for a living. If that is the case, you may never be sure, but, do not base that conclusion on the gripe sessions that you have read on this site. The fact is, gold diggers exist in all professions, in other words a womans ethics, morals, and overall class are not decided by her profession, it goes much deeper than that, regardless of what she does for a living. So from my perspective your concerns in this department should be the same as your concerns with any other woman, that is 50/50 split until proven otherwise, besides I'm sure you'll be smart enough to know if you are getting taken advantage of. Regarding question two, I am going to repeat, do not take the gripe sessions that you read on this site as gospel. I look at them as another perspective, no more, no less.

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    Featured Member NikkiD's Avatar
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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    and if you don't act like a trick, you won't be treated like a trick.


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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re:Starting a relationship?

    Howdy Ted!

    You sound a bit on the young side, but it does sound like you're off to a good start.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stunt_Ted link=board=27;threadid=9214;start=msg109613#msg109 613 date=1084638583
    1-i am a good spender and suppoter how can i tell if she is play (gold digger) or she likes me?
    If you haven't had a lot of relationships or many female friends in the past, this can be a toughy. The best thing you can do is meter response on the "little" things and see if they are to scale with the pricier expenditures. A gold digger doesn't usually go all Movie of the Week over a single long stemmed rose, or a nice cheap picnic outing at the lake feeding ducks.

    Being a gentlemanly supporter doesn't always have to equate to being a big spender. There are way too numerous of things that you can do for her that come from the heart, are spontaneous, and carry a large, meaningful message of your adoration without a high price tag. These things usually mean much more to someone that isn't a gold digger than the pricey stuff because they involve time, attention to details and reflect how much thought you've put into her and your relationship versus a quick swipe of a small, rectangular piece of plastic at Neiman Marcus.

    By the way, I think it's great if you're being a big supporter/spender. It's a dieing trait amongst men these days, so be proud of yourself if you're one of the remaining "always pick up the check" and "always woo" style of gentleman. The women I'm meeting these days are all freaked by it which is disconcerting to realize how many cheap and emotionally neglectful bastards are really out there.


    2- i wanna know about the way she may look at me (lika dog?) i am not looking for what said prize in the pants but i want that sex should be part the what we are going through (with the growh of the relationship)?
    Wow, so if I'm reading between the lines properly- you've been seeing this woman for two months, but haven't been to the dessert tray yet?

    Strictly my opinion and obviously a judgement call based on one's personal morals/ethics (also take my skewed, west coast liberal geographic into consideration), but at two months I'd say it's getting to code-red to get that sex thing out of the way if it's been a close two months as in a real relationship. I mean, if she's not seeing anyone else and the two of you are solid, it's been over 2 months for her.. and who knows how long for you. I'm all for taking things slow and playing by ear, but if you're being mr. support and mr. spend for two months and haven't started steering things that way.. and she's not either, I'd be a little concerned. If you've only seen her 3-4 times during that two months, everything is cool.. but I'm assuming by how you're talking about her that she's at least a multi-times per week relationship or more.

    You're going to start slipping into "Nice Guy" territory soon otherwise, and there's no way out of that fox hole. Soon, you'll be come nothing more than a number on her cell speed dial and used when some appliance needs fixing or she needs help moving.
    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

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