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Thread: Respect

  1. #1
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Respect

    Treating ppl they way you wanted to be treated. I am polite, I tip well, I keep myself groomed. I realize the dancers are there to make money. Everything sounds great, But I've overheard girls at the "lazy" table or at the bar, complain about pathetic losers, lonely guy, perv, etc. . or complain about guys not getting dances, if customer didn't want a LD that the he shouldn't be there. Hello! ladies. You forget this is also a bar, they serve food, they play music, the game is on the big screen, and yes there are naked ladies there. You ask, if i wanted to drink, then go to a bar. If i wanted a meal, then go to a restaurant. If i wanted to watch the game or listen to music, go to a sports bar. Well, This place has ALL of that, AND beautiful women. I come to watch dances. The problem is, girls hardly dance when they are on stage, they sorta of just walk around onstage until they can hit the floor. Respect your artform, dance. It's a stripclub, not a LAPDANCE club. Granted thats where you make your money. But so does the cook, the DJ, the waitresses, and the bartenders. Don't get mad if guys don't ask you for a dance or are willing to spend money on you. You're probably doing something wrong. I could easily tip the waitress $20 bucks a drink, if she sat and kept me good company. One more thing, Did you pick your Regular, or did the Regular pick you. I find that some ladies plop their purses down "try" and keep me company until they 'dwanna dance" me. then try to keep asking me if i want another one. 1. I didnt ask you to sit. 2. you leaving your purse, cigarettes, drink there, is scaring off the girls that I actually want to be with. I guess I'm not mean enought to tell them to move on to someone else. You want to be treated with respect, treat your customer the same. I'm working on strategies to cut off this person. Her loss.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

  2. #2
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    This is not an attack, please don't take it as such. Just an observation.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

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    Featured Member tragic-beauty's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    ever think about finding a different club?

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    I see this behavior in dancers a lot....I empathize with you. Dances are our bread and butter, so we get annoyed if guys aren't buying them, but as long as you're tipping, then you're fine in my book.

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    Default Re:Respect

    Was it a really slow night or was the club really busy? I think this could be more likely to happen when the women don't have many customers in the club and they start feeling frustrated because they aren't making money.

    Really what they should complain about is why more people dont come to the club or why there are too many dancers working on a slow night... its unfair to pick on some guy who is hanging out at the bar or whatever just because he doesn't have enough money to buy dances from every dancer in the club.

  6. #6
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    I know exactly where you are coming from. I actually once had a guy ask me the name of another dancer very casually- I got the hint that it was her that he was interested in. I even got a dance from him in the end- why? Because I went up to the girl who he asked about and told her to go sit with him, before he left, he came up to me and said, "I really appreciate you telling such and such I was interested, how about I get a dance from you before I leave."

    Some girls won't get the hint though, and no, I wouldn't take you as being mean in asking someone to leave your table.

    A polite way of telling a dancer that you are not interested in her (but interested in general) is saying something like, "I just got here and I'd like to think about who I want a dance from after I've seen everyone on stage." You've left it open but you've also been polite. But, most girls won't get the hint - and sometimes you might have to just be direct.

    Personally, I empathize with you, and if you overhear such comments I can understand your frustration. I've actually heard girls ask men if they are gay when they say no to them for a dance.. irritates me.. Some girls just need to realize that not every guy is going to like them.. which is why this business is so great.. IMHO.


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  7. #7
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Thanks, you ladies are all real nice. For a minute I thought you were going to attack me and say it was my Breath, LOL. No but really. I have a hard time asking a girl to leave, because I don&#039;t want them to think I don&#039;t find them attactive. YOU are all attactive, or you wouldn&#039;t have been hired. I&#039;ve never seen an ugly dancer. Even at the worst dives. Every woman is attactive in someway. That&#039;s why waitresses can get tipped very well by me. They are usually good company when it&#039;s slow. I also think they like the attention that they get, that is to say, I&#039;m spending time with her, rather than ogling the beautiful topless woman onstage. Do you ladies get mad at your regular when you spend more and more time with him before you ask him for a dance. Most likely he is uncomfortable asking you, because he sees you as a friend. (bad for business I know) but I&#039;m sure when he gets a dance from you, He&#039;ll keep going for a few songs. Don&#039;t pump him dry for his cash right there. ( I have a hard time saying NO, good for business, but bad for me ) <---- Yes I am a sucker. I&#039;m trying to break this habit and still be nice.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Welcome to StripperWeb AzAzn!

    You&#039;ll always see good, helpful advice from the ladies here since most of them here know your given description really doesn&#039;t apply to them. If you&#039;re tipping for stage shows and do want to buy dances (provided the dancer is one of your choosing), you&#039;re really exactly what defines a stripclub customer and doing nothing wrong at all.

    The scenario you&#039;ve given is a tough one from the "nice guy" male standpoint. Someone has sat down that you are disinterested in buying a dance from, but you dont want to reject them in such a way to be impolite.. while also not wanting to waste their time knowing this is their job. Throw in dancers with varying degrees of aggressive sales techniques and it&#039;s hard to catch all clubs, all dancers and all situations.

    The way I&#039;ve handled this is as follows:
    "Hello, I&#039;m sorry but I&#039;m actually waiting for someone right now and I really don&#039;t want to waste your time." (with a big, sincere smile)

    If they start to inquire who, I simply reply with:
    "Oh, I&#039;ll know when I see her. Thank you, though!"

    There.. you&#039;ve wasted a total of 20 seconds of her time, you&#039;ve made it pretty clear you dont wish to be bothered, and you&#039;ve also been 100% honest since you ARE looking for someone ELSE.

    If they still persist or insist upon sitting down and continue trying to capture a sale, I&#039;ll either turn and no longer acknowledge them, or excuse myself and go to another bar/chair. I give dancers enough credit to have gotten the hint and may follow up with a few last "No thank you"&#039;s, but if that&#039;s not good enough then they&#039;re taking advantage of your politeness, assuming you&#039;re some push over, and business has been slow. Their choice to try to take it further earns them disegard past that.. but 99.9% of the time, it stops at that more pleasant, 20 second mark with professional/earnest dancers.
    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

  9. #9
    Senior Member Brooke Quinn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Quote Originally Posted by AzAzn link=board=8;threadid=10155;start=msg122787#msg122 787 date=1087336502
    Don&#039;t get mad if guys don&#039;t ask you for a dance or are willing to spend money on you. You&#039;re probably doing something wrong.
    That&#039;s the only part I somewhat disagree with. Sometimes a dancer doesn&#039;t HAVE to do anything WRONG. She may simply not be the guy&#039;s type.

    Good post. Highly relevant. Unfortunately, a bad attitude is an occupational hazard. That&#039;s when it&#039;s time to take some time off and get your head screwed on straight.

    Dancing is far from the worst job in the world, but it&#039;s not necessarily the "PARTY" that it looks like. I&#039;ve NEVER claimed to be making "easy money." This shit is hard.
    Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Mileah Davis

    Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try. - Yoda, Star Wars

  10. #10
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Don&#039;t get me wrong. I&#039;m sure it&#039;s extremely difficult emotionally and physically. But you have to remember. You&#039;re probably making much more than your customer makes. Much more infact. This person is spending what little disposable income he has to come have a good time and relax, have a drink, eat dinner, enjoy the company of beautiful women. If he&#039;s making like $600 a week. He&#039;s spending his entire week&#039;s salary in ONE night. How many ppl do you know outside of the clubs that blow $1200 a month without anything to show for it. Thats a house payment for average joe. He feels he can part with this to enjoy himself twice a month. Your right though, not every girl is a guys type, but usually every girl is attactive. It&#039;s the attitude that blows the sale. He&#039;s not a cheapskate, He probably doesn&#039;t want to waste money. That&#039;s just being a good consumer. Just as you ladies have to be good business women. Why turn a guy off and have him put you on the &#039;never again list&#039; vs making hundreds in the long run.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

  11. #11
    Featured Member CrescentLuna's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    How coincidental, a customer asked me tonight what was the polite way to tell a dancer you weren&#039;t interested in a dance! *laughs* He ended up buying two from me, but was a trifle annoying - we chat for ten minutes and he buys a dance, doesn&#039;t tip, askes if I&#039;ll sit with him after my stage set. So I do. After twenty minutes of pretending not to grope me he finally buys another dance, I say "do you want to keep going?" him: "uhm, no, let&#039;s sit awhlie and then I&#039;ll buy another dance" me: "I&#039;m sorry, but I think I need to work the floor a little more" which he wasn&#039;t thrilled about, but oh well.
    "I still have my name
    I still have my face
    I have not run away from home
    Doesn't seem so long
    If I now embrace
    Every single thing I've never known"

  12. #12
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    The girls who sit around on the floor and bitch about customers are just stupid. Nothing else to say about it. Don&#039;t waste your time being bothered by it.

    Luna. Eccchhh! The dreaded time counter. He thinks we&#039;re supposed to spend 10-20 minutes for free with him for EVERY dance, and gets annoyed/offended when we aren&#039;t willing to do so. He wants to dole out his dollars as s-l-o-w-l-y as possible, and expects us to be ok with it. This is the type of guy who has sat and calculated what he thinks we make per hour and compared it to his own hourly wage, and decided he must spend his money on us at the same or lower rate. BS! Don&#039;t sweat it hun. Just walk away to someone new, as it seems you did. Not worth the bother.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess NinaDaisy's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    I agree with a lot of these posts, however, I don&#039;t really do a lot on stage, but I don&#039;t think risking my neck for a few more dollars and "oohs and aahhs" from the crowd vis-a-vis pole tricks means I don&#039;t respect dancing. I move pretty slowly and, I think, sensually on stage and there are definitely guys that love that. I&#039;d love to be better at polework, but I don&#039;t get nearly enough time to practice and I&#039;m not gonna try doing stuff in front of a crowd.

    Polecat&#039;s suggestions for politely declining were spot-on. No one likes rejection, but do it politely and efficiently and there are no hard feeling from me whatsoever.
    "She has written so well, and marvellously well, that I was completely ashamed of myself as a writer...But this girl, who is to my knowledge very unpleasant and we might even say a high-grade bitch, can write rings around all of us who consider ourselves as writers"

    Ernest Hemingway on writer, aviation pioneer and horse trainer Beryl Markham


  14. #14
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    It&#039;s not really a question of how long we can keep a dancer around without paying. That&#039;s a waste of your time and ours. If you pick up a guy is going to tip you slowly, it&#039;s probably because he didn&#039;t want to tip you in the first place. It would be a much more effecient use of your time to find out if a customer wanted a dance before investing 20 minutes on him or even more. Like the sure bet is if he tipped you onstage. He&#039;s taken the time and effort to show you he appreciates you. Arizona seems to be a &#039;dwanna dance&#039; place, the dances are inexpensive $5-$7 , $10 for a private dance, and $20 for a VIP after a $25 dollar entrance fee. Circulating around would be the best way to find out who you could hustle. I&#039;ve had a girl sit down and eat her lunch/dinner with me. Great, I was flattered, but listening to her talk about what a bad night she was having was killing the mood. It&#039;s great that on a slow night that girls are making time for a guy who could be a potential customer. Just don&#039;t be upset, he&#039;s not paying to listen to how bad the night is and noone is tipping or getting dances. That puts him on the spot, guilting him into a dance. He doesn&#039;t want to be one of &#039;those&#039; guys so he reluctantly gives in.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

  15. #15
    Member Miniman's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Well my philosophy in life is simple:

    - If you go to a strip club, it is about the ladies. Who cares what game, food or other fun the club has running.
    - Because it is about the ladies, you respect them.
    - If a girl is nice enough to drop by to talk to you, you buy a dance. Even if your eyes are on another dancer. Her time is money. If you repsect her, you respect her time, you spread the wealth.
    - Buy drinks. I buy a round for the girls and they all sit with me. Even if just for a few minutes. But talk about a way to know them all and manage expectations both ways.
    - And going to strip clubs ain&#039;t about getting sex. See my comments about respect above.

    Few simple rules and the experience is awsome.

    I am not a number. I am a free man

  16. #16
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    I disagree. I&#039;m not buyging a dance from every girl who sits down. That&#039;s ridiculous. That would be like going to the grocery store and buy everything in it, or going to a car dealership to buy a corvette then buy every car on the lot. As stated before, not every girl is to be a guy&#039;s type. As far as the other entertainment in the club. You find me one upscale gentlemen&#039;s club worth its salt that doesn&#039;t have big screens or a kitchen. That&#039;s what also brings ppl in. An excuse to go there. "Hey I&#039;m hungry, let&#039;s go grab a bite at StripClubX" or "Hey the De La Hoya fight is on, let&#039;s watch it at StripClubX". Sorry, I don&#039;t go there JUST for the ladies. It&#039;s a whole package. A whole atmosphere. Hell, if I only had the option to go to a SC that didn&#039;t offer atmosphere, I probably wouldn&#039;t go at all. Why you&#039;re at it, why don&#039;t you take the music and booze away. Then you could sit in a pretty boring room and get lap dance over and over and over. Pretty boring my friend. If EVERY guy in there bought EVERY girl a drink. I think the girls would spend more time in the bathroom than on stage. The club should have lots of Amenities. Thats what makes it a nice place to be.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

  17. #17
    Featured Member CrescentLuna's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    AzAzn, I didn&#039;t mean to imply that I was plopping down and expecting him to pay me for my time, he ASKED me to spend time with him, but didn&#039;t tip/pay me for it, before or after doing so, which proved to me that at least that particular customer didn&#039;t want to compensate for my time. If you only want conversation, that&#039;s fine, but expect to show me that it&#039;s worth my while if you aren&#039;t going to buy dances. If you do want dances, then please purchase them in a reasonable amount of time.

    Hee, miniman, I wish you visited my club more often! Hee, it depends on how much you go into spend, if you have xamount for "whatever" that sounds fine. However, if you know you can only buy, say, 3 lap dances and know which dancer you want them from, I don&#039;t think "spreading the wealth" is really needed.
    "I still have my name
    I still have my face
    I have not run away from home
    Doesn't seem so long
    If I now embrace
    Every single thing I've never known"

  18. #18
    Senior Member AzAzn's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    Why would I want to &#039;spread the wealth&#039; ? Why give every dancer in the club $20 bucks, when I could give my ATF $500. Letting everyone know you have money and flashing the cash seems pretencious.
    ~Even now in Heaven, there are Angels carrying savage weapons~

  19. #19
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re:Respect

    AzAzn,I agree with you.These girls don&#039;t make enough effort on stage,as a result most guys aren&#039;t interested in getting dances from them.The root of this business is entertainment.I make my stage sets interesting,sometimes even loosening things up by making it comical.You gotta let your personality out.As a result,not having to hustle nearly as much on the floor.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

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