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Thread: Strange U.S. Sex Laws

  1. #1
    God/dess A_Guy's Avatar
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    Default Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Not sure how accurate these are, but some are pretty funny:

    -- In Bakersfield, California, anyone having intercourse with Satan
    must use a condom. (An asbestos one we presume.)

    -- In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while
    hunting or fishing on your wedding day.

    -- In Minnesota, it is illegal for any man to have sexual intercourse
    with a live fish. (Apparently it's OK for woman.)

    -- No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic,
    onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife
    so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.

    -- Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't
    allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with
    you -- or holding you in his arms.

    -- Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown -- if they're nude.

    -- In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to
    have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!

    -- The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to
    provide each guest with a clean and pressed nightshirt. No couple, even if they are married, may sleep together in the nude. Nor may they have sex unless they are wearing one of these clean, white cotton nightshirts.

    -- An ordinance in Newcastle, Wyoming, specifically bans couples from having sex while standing inside a store's walk-in meat freezer!

    -- A state law in Illinois mandates that all bachelors should be called
    master, not mister, when addressed by their female counterparts.

    -- In Romboch, Virginia, it is illegal to engage in sexual activity
    with the lights on.

    -- In Merryville, Missouri, women are prohibited from wearing corsets
    because "the privilege of admiring the curvaceous, unencumbered body of a young woman should not be denied to the normal, red-blooded American male."

    -- It's safe to make love while parked in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. Police
    officers aren't allowed to walk up and knock on the window. Any
    suspicious officer who thinks that sex is taking place must drive up
    from behind, honk his horn three times and wait approximately two
    minutes before getting out of his car to investigate.

    -- A law in Helena, Montana, mandates that a woman can't dance on a table in a saloon or bar unless she has on at least three pounds, two ounces of clothing. (Ouch! These pasties hurt!)

    -- Anywhere in the U.S., it's illegal to use any live endangered
    species, excepting insects, in public or private sexual displays, shows
    or exhibits depicting cross-species sex. (Insectophiles apparently were successful in their lobbying efforts.)

    -- Lovers in Liberty Corner, New Jersey, should avoid satisfying their
    lustful urges in a parked car. If the horn accidentally sounds while
    they are frolicking behind the wheel, the couple can face a jail term.

    -- In Carlsbad, New Mexico, it's legal for couples to have sex in a
    parked vehicle during their lunch break from work, as long as the car or van has drawn curtains to stop strangers from peeking in.

    -- Women aren't allowed to wear patent-leather shoes in Cleveland, Ohio - a man might see the reflection of something "he oughtn't!"

    -- No woman may have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance within the boundaries of Tremonton, Utah. If caught, the woman can be charged with a sexual misdemeanor and "her name is to be published in the local newspaper." The man isn't charged nor is his name revealed.

    -- It is illegal for any member of the Nevada Legislature to conduct
    official business wearing a penis costume while the legislature is in
    session.


  2. #2
    Veteran Member bloodydewdrop's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    OMG...these are too funny...there are no words to describe it. I wonder how many of them are accurate or enforced. Next time I'm in Cleveland I might wear some patent leather shoes and test it......hehe

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    God/dess A_Guy's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by bloodydewdrop link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123398#msg123 398 date=1087420687
    OMG...these are too funny...there are no words to describe it. I wonder how many of them are accurate or enforced. Next time I'm in Cleveland I might wear some patent leather shoes and test it......hehe
    Apparently the Cleveland law is true!

    Here's another funny Ohio law, specifically for the dancers!

    In Oxford, Ohio
    "It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture. "

    So none of that you crazy women!! Us realtime guys may take offense! :cheesy:

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    God/dess montythegeek's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by bloodydewdrop link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123398#msg123 398 date=1087420687
    OMG...these are too funny...there are no words to describe it. I wonder how many of them are accurate or enforced. Next time I'm in Cleveland I might wear some patent leather shoes and test it......hehe
    Be careful bloodydewdrop. The punishment is severe--30 days in Cleveland!!

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    Veteran Member bloodydewdrop's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by A_Guy link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123402#msg123 402 date=1087421096
    Quote Originally Posted by bloodydewdrop link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123398#msg123 398 date=1087420687
    OMG...these are too funny...there are no words to describe it. I wonder how many of them are accurate or enforced. Next time I'm in Cleveland I might wear some patent leather shoes and test it......hehe
    Apparently the Cleveland law is true!

    Here's another funny Ohio law, specifically for the dancers!

    In Oxford, Ohio
    "It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture. "

    So none of that you crazy women!! Us realtime guys may take offense! :cheesy:
    Ohhh boy.....good thing I don't live in ohio. I undress every night in front of my lord of the rings poster featuring a very hot elf. does his non-human species count?

    Hehe....monty, I will head your warning. no shiny shoes. i don't think i could stand 30 days in cleveland. no offence to ohio residents....the place just doesn't jive with me

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    God/dess RoseDelight's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    lol, too funny.


    --Georg Christoph Litchenberg



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    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    In Idaho it is illegal to preform oral sex with shoes on.


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    Senior Member darlinpandora's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    guess that ill have to take off my shoes next time
    If you search deep enough in your soul, you'll always find a slight reminder of me.... - TLC Something Wicked This Way Comes

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    God/dess Zofia's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    In North Carolina it's prostitution for an opposite sex couple to cohabitate! It's now legal for same sex couples though. Of course same sex couples can't get married in NC. So, I'm a prostitute for living with my boyfriend, but it's cool if I have a lesbian fling, hmmmmm....

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    Veteran Member bloodydewdrop's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by Zofia link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123666#msg123 666 date=1087468668
    In North Carolina it's prostitution for an opposite sex couple to cohabitate! It's now legal for same sex couples though. Of course same sex couples can't get married in NC. So, I'm a prostitute for living with my boyfriend, but it's cool if I have a lesbian fling, hmmmmm....
    Do people try to enforce this Zofia? It's absolutely insane!!!

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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Well, these don't deal much with sex, but for the state of Illinois, here are some laws we must abide by on a daily basis:

    You may be convicted of a Class 4 felony offense, punishable by up to three years in state prison, for the crime of "eavesdropping" on your own conversation. -720 ILCS 5/14-2.

    It is illegal to give a dog whiskey. Well, there goes my happy hour!

    Law forbids eating in a place that is on fire. But it keeps the food warmer longer!

    It is forbidden to fish while sitting on a giraffe's neck. Which is probably why all the giraffes have moved...no work.

    It is legal to protest naked in front of city hall as long as you are under seventeen years of age and have legal permits. Why does this scare me?

    It is against the law to use a slingshot unless your are a law enforcement officer. And, even then, only if your name is David.

    For a rural area:
    A rooster must step back three hundred feet from any residence if he wishes to crow. Hens that wish to cackle must step two hundred feet back from any residence. Sorry, mam, this rooster just violated code 718.2a. We need to take him in and book him.

    Ice skating at the Riverside pond during the months of June and August is prohibited. Darwinism at it's finest...

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Found something:

    In NY, NY:

    Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.

    So, does that mean that I can accept donations?


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    God/dess Zofia's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by bloodydewdrop link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123733#msg123 733 date=1087490161
    Quote Originally Posted by Zofia link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123666#msg123 666 date=1087468668
    In North Carolina it's prostitution for an opposite sex couple to cohabitate! It's now legal for same sex couples though. Of course same sex couples can't get married in NC. So, I'm a prostitute for living with my boyfriend, but it's cool if I have a lesbian fling, hmmmmm....
    Do people try to enforce this Zofia? It's absolutely insane!!!
    As far as I know the only time it is enforced is when one of the parties is married to someone else and they are seeking a divorce. NC is a fault divorce state, and violating the law can be grounds for a divorce. Also, I'd suspect that if you got into a custody battle it could be a problem. So far it's just been a big joke between me and my boyfriend when we found out that I'm a pro and he's a john. It's sort of kinky!


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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Quote Originally Posted by VenusGoddess link=board=1;threadid=10196;start=msg123753#msg123 753 date=1087493952
    Found something:

    In NY, NY:

    Women may go topless in public, providing it is not being used as a business.

    So, does that mean that I can accept donations?

    I bet you could sart some sort of "non-profit" organization! Ooh! During holiday time you could do the bell and bucket thing for donations. Maybe the Salvation Army will pick up on this one...



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    Rhode Island prohibits unmarried people from partaking of bedroom activities under any circumstances. However, if caught, the lovers are both fined $10.

    Unmarried adults in Arizona who decide to fool around a little are committing a serious felony. Anyone single, man or woman, caught having sex can be sent to the penitentiary for three full years.

    Buckfield, Maine, has a rather unusual law regarding cab drivers and sex. The legislation declares that no taxi driver "will be allowed" to charge a fare to any passenger who gives him sexual favors" in return for a ride home from a nightclub or other "establishment which serves alcoholic beverages," or any "place of business" selling liquor


    The city of Cottonwood, Arizona banned people from having sex in a vehicle with "flat wheels." If the vehicle with flat wheels is parked, and you're caught making love in the front seat, it's a $25 fine. But if you're caught playing around while in the back seat, the fine is doubled

    Connecticut still retains an old law forbidding any kind of "private sexual behavior between consenting adults." This odd law makes absolutely no distinction between married and single couples.

    A Florida sex law: If you're a single, divorced, or widowed woman, you can't parachute on Sunday afternoons.

    Arizona
    In Tucson, it is illigal for women to wear pants.
    In Globe, it is illigal to play cards in the street with a Native American.
    In Glendale, it is illigal to drive a car in reverse.
    In Nogales, it is illigal to wear suspenders.


    Connecticut
    In Hartford, it is illegal to educate a dog.
    It is illegal to dispose used razor blades.
    In New Britain, the speed limit for fire trucks is 25 m.p.h., even when going to a fire.
    In Hartford, it is illegal for a man to kiss his wife on Sunday.

    Massachusetts
    In Salem, even married couples are forbidden from sleeping in the nude in rented rooms.
    It is illegal to wear a goatee without a license.
    North Andover prohibits its citizens from carrying "space guns".
    State legislation forbids dueling with water pistols.
    In Boston, it is illegal to take a bath unless one has been ordered by a physician to do so.
    In 1659, the state outlawed Christmas.

    New York
    In New York City, it is illegal for a woman to be on the street wearing "body hugging clothing".
    In New York City, it is illegal for a man to turn around and look ``at a woman in that way,'' and violators are forced to wear horse blinders.
    In Staten Island, it is illegal for a father to call his son a ``faggot'' or ``queer'' in an effort to curb ``girlie behavior.''
    In New York City, ``It is disorderly conduct for one man to greet another on the street by placing the end of his thumb against the tip of his nose, at the same time extending and wiggling the fingers of his hand.''

    Rhode Island
    In Providence, it is illegal to sell toothpaste and a toothbrush to the same customer on a Sunday.
    It is illegal to throw pickle juice on a trolley.
    In Newport, it is illegal to smoke a pipe after sunset.




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    God/dess Lexi's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    These are all hysterical, but obviously they arent all true or arent enforced. Body hugging clothing illegal in NYC?

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    Featured Member SCGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re:Strange U.S. Sex Laws

    acutally, in NY state, it is perfectly legal for a woman to go shirtless anywhere a man can! Somehow I think the cops would yell at you for that though (or just scold you because, duh, they'd WANT to! ).
    "You did then what you knew how to do; when you knew better, you did better" ~Maya Angelou

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