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Thread: My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Its a sad day for me. I've lost my family. My dad knows I strip. He is going to tell me mom and brother, then it will be complete. I will have no family.

    I've been crying so much that my eyes are almost unrecognizable with swelling. He told me that he does not want to see any trace of my existence in his home in Houston. He reminded me to take my degrees that he so proudly hung up on the walls-because whores don't need degrees.

    My heart literally aches with pain and sorrow. I can't write out the details of what happened yet, I am such a mess.

    Newbies who are so excited to become strippers beware, this could be you....

    Thanks for listening to my vent. Big kiss to everyone!!

    Kat

    (too sad to meow)

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  2. #2
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Kat:

    I don't know what to say to make you feel better, but I can tell you that I have been exactly where you are, and sooner or later your family will come around. They say what they do now out of anger and lack of understanding. Remember; People are afraid of what they don't understand.

    PM me if you'd like.. I went thru the trials and tribulations of this myself and it all worked out.. .

    Many hugs to you... and my shoulder if you need it...

    Gynger


    [/URL]
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    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I'm in agreement with Gynger...you have my shoulder if you need it.

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    Featured Member sander8son's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    sorry to hear it kat. that really sucks. i know its your family and everything, but who needs them? they can piss off. keep improving yourself for your own good, not for them.

  5. #5
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Thanks ya'll are the bestest!!!

    Ok, ok, I do have a tendency to be a bit hystrionic. My plan is to deny, deny, deny if questioned by other family members further, I do have plausible deniability.

    The fact that he KNOWS really fucked my night up last night. I decided to self-medicate with 3 shots of tequila which turned out with me getting ripped off for dancing with one group, getting in trouble with management for careless dancing in VIP, and having to leave early because I was crying uncontrollably in the dressing room at the thought of being disowned...

    Yup, after almost 6.5 years, it was MY TURN to be that crying chiq in the dressing room LOL!!

    At least the other girls were sooooo supportive, as was management and the DJ's.

    Once again, thanks everyone!!!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  6. #6
    Member Michelle024's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Hey girl, cheer up. It's your life to live ya know? If you want to dance then that is your decision and you are the one who has to live with that....I was 18 when I first danced and my parents knew what I was doing. They were supportive and told me to be careful and look out for #1, ME..... Your family will love and care about you no matter what they may say now..... Hold on for the ride and you'll look back at this and be able to smile......

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Quote Originally Posted by sander8son link=board=27;threadid=10230;start=msg123931#msg12 3931 date=1087511256
    sorry to hear it kat. that really sucks. i know its your family and everything, but who needs them? they can piss off. keep improving yourself for your own good, not for them.
    When my parents and I immigrated here with nothing, they always told me that we have no one but each other in this country, and that we must always be there and support each other. I actually believed this drivel. Family is important to me, just like religion is important to some people, its a sort of faith-thing. You can't ask someone to stop believing in the value of their family. I know lots of people here do not communicate with their families, and I respect your decisions, but I'm just relating how its always been for me, go figure

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    God/dess blondhottie's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I'm so sorry, Katrine. My family would do the same thing to me if they found out I strip. They don't know and I hope they never find out.

    Sorry you have to go through this-it sucks for those of us who don't have supportive families. Your family should be there for you no matter what.






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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I am so sorry Katrine.
    I wish that people would realise that strippers are just like everyone else, for the most part. We have feeling and emotion. And just because we happen to take our clothes off. We are jaded and degraded.
    I am here for you sweetie!
    Opinions are one thing that makes us all individuals.

  10. #10
    bostondancer
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I bet your dad has had his fun in strip club before


    He was probaly was a bad boy and thats why he thinks what you do is dirty

    Most of us do not have families , should they really be happy for you ? Wouldn't that be weird ?! If your family was like Wow good for you !! lol keep your head up girl

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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Quote Originally Posted by Michelle024 link=board=27;threadid=10230;start=msg123937#msg12 3937 date=1087511703
    Hey girl, cheer up. It's your life to live ya know? If you want to dance then that is your decision and you are the one who has to live with that....I was 18 when I first danced and my parents knew what I was doing. They were supportive and told me to be careful and look out for #1, ME..... Your family will love and care about you no matter what they may say now..... Hold on for the ride and you'll look back at this and be able to smile......
    Most of my family reacted the same way as Michelle's. I did (and still do) have a few family members who decided to be assholes about it. These were the hypocritical ones - like my Uncle who claims to be such a Christian...then takes his pre-teen sons into Hooters and his neighborhood bar, and is also a customer of Joy (the highest contact/most extras ridden club in town).
    I think if your father meant what he said about how family was everything, that he will come around. He probably just had other things in mind for you concerning your future. It's a fact of life that every parent must someday give up their own dreams that they had for their children - and let their children be free to pursue their own dreams and find their own happiness and experiences in life. It's a hard thing to do, because it involves a lot of letting go and trusting in his parenting skills, and believing that his best was enough.
    In the meantime, take some time to make yourself feel better - after all - you ARE the same person today as you were yesterday or last week before the family found out. Hopefully your family will be able to realize this as well.

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    Veteran Member bloodydewdrop's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I'm really sorry that happened Katrine. Perhaps after he works through this he will accept it. Like Brittany says, if he truly believes in his family values, he will be able to move past this. Take care of yourself!

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Well Kat I am REALLY sorry this has happened to you, and although I'm of the opinion if they treat you like that they don't deserve your emotion, I also think that if they truly feel family is the most important thing, they will eventually come around. Hang on hun, things will get better.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    That's so unfortunate. Here's to hoping for the best possible outcome, Katrine...or alternatively, hoping for your personal recovery regardless of the outcome.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I'm so sorry this happened, Kat! Ugh..

    I was disowned myself several years ago.. complete with that whole diploma removal. Did they take all your baby pictures down yet? lol.

    If it help you to feel better- this is all pretty common with caring parents when they feel you've let them down. Parents also have a hard time understanding how things are and can take months to figure it all out and deal with the shock. These initial 'disown' reactions are the only way they know how to handle it. It will change over time.

    Big HUGS Kat! Chin up, sport. This kind of thing is inevitable, and you know what? A few years down the road I'm sure you'll be much happier when everything is resolved. Tip-toeing around one's demons is never a good thing and family IS so important. They love you and this initial reaction is something THEY need to go through for themselves.

    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

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    God/dess Rhiannon's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Kat sweetie,

    I'm sorry this has happened to you. If you ever need to talk, you know I'm here.

    ~Hugs~
    Rhi

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    God/dess Lexi's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Katrine,
    Im sorry hun. It sucks when shit like this happens. Im going through something totally different but cant stop crying either, so I feel your pain. PM me if you wanna talk.
    I am here for ya



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    Banned MissTaylor's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Katrine,

    I'm so sorry you are sad right now. It totally sucks. I was disowned at 19 for working at Hooters and it totally sucks (they'd probably kill me if they knew where I am now). My parents eventually came around and yours will too. Stay strong and hold your head up high.

    We love you *BIG hugs*

  19. #19
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine link=board=27;threadid=10230;start=msg123938#msg12 3938 date=1087511711
    Quote Originally Posted by sander8son link=board=27;threadid=10230;start=msg123931#msg12 3931 date=1087511256
    sorry to hear it kat. that really sucks. i know its your family and everything, but who needs them? they can piss off. keep improving yourself for your own good, not for them.
    When my parents and I immigrated here with nothing, they
    always told me that we have no one but each other in this country, and that we must always be there and support each other. I actually believed this drivel. Family is important to me, just like religion is important to some people, its a sort of faith-thing. You can't ask someone to stop believing in the value of their family. I know lots of people here do not communicate with their families, and I respect your decisions, but I'm just relating how its always been for me, go figure
    kat, i literally feel your pain. My father (daddys girl) found out less then a year ago and he and i were devistated.
    The relationship i had that was once so strong is close to gone.

    The sorrow that this has caused me is imeasurable. If i had a chance, i would go back in time

  20. #20
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Thanks once again everyone!

    And thank you for listening to my drama queen posts, hehehe!

    Generally, my life is very nice and laid back. I did overeact about the big man and I breaking up forever, and we were back within a week, so hopefully this situation might be similar. Still, its one thing for me to have done my man of 2 years wrong and get called on it, versus being called a whore by the man I've called daddy for 27 years.

    Yes, he is dissapointed. Most people don't understand why a woman with a master's degree in business would be a stripper, so I just don't talk about it. I'm finally calming down, having fun reading all of the last few days posts.

    Oh yeah, they cancelled Velvet Revolver at Stubbs tonight Taylor....sucks!!!! I was hoping to use Scott Weiland's skinny heroin-addled body for commiseration.....oh well, October!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  21. #21
    Veteran Member Trix's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I'm really sorry to hear about that...I too cherish family, and the thought of my parents disowning me is sure to send me in panic attacks. I mean..my mother practically got to that point when she found out about my piercings. She started crying and yelling "why? why??" as if to say I got piercings to deliberately hurt her. And then she started blaming herself and saying it was her fault, "where did i go wrong??"

    I think your dad is going through the same thing. He's taking it as a deliberate attempt to disappoint him. When in reality, its not. You're still the SAME person that he thought so highly of last week, and the week before, and so on. Nothing's changed. And I think with a little time and your help, he'll see that. Right now he's probably too heated to listen to your opinions. But I will hope and pray that it will all work out for the best, and your degrees will be proudly displayed on the wall again.

    I've been going through a tough time in the past 3 weeks...and even more so in the past 5 days, I can't stop crying either. I say we get together and just let it all out...heh..

    big hugs to you hun...i'm here now and always for you..

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    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Hi Kat,

    I am so sorry you're going thru drama with your dad. I do hope that in time he comes around and realizes just how important you are to him.
    Stay strong sweetie..
    ,
    Farrah
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I do hope he doesn't mean it. Can't you just deny it?


  24. #24
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    I am denying it. There's a chance I can turn it around. But I don't want to dig my hole any deeper or the lies will catch up. Plausible deniability is on my side, but I am not going to try to work an elaborate story out of it.

    He has some evidence (rhinestone stripper panties left on a dryer) and some word of mouth. He probably also searched my room and found stuff. I am not quite sure how much he knows so I can only be defensive. Not enough info to launch a strong offensive...

    meow!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  25. #25
    Veteran Member SexyJess's Avatar
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    Default Re:My Dad Knows-I've Been Disowned!

    Awww, I'm sorry Katrine. What a sad situation.... that's something I fear happening myself. My parents are understanding, for the most part, and know I have a wild streak. But I know they'd never understand the dancing. They've never been to a strip club, so all they have to go on is the message the media sends about stripping, and I once heard my dad say dancers are whores (eek).
    I think your parents will come around. Love for a child is unconditional. Give him some time to cool off.... and good luck!!!

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