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Thread: I..... Have Returned

  1. #1
    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default I..... Have Returned

    Yes folks.. Today.. I.. Peejay PJ. Prester_John, have returned to the Strip Club going scene. My last time was in December, and really didnt seem to want to go back.

    Thanks to Boredom and a wad of cash, I returned Tonight.

    The trip was the usual. I bought one drink which I nursed all night, sat away from the stage so I didnt have to tip, asked each dancer what I got for my 20 bucks, propositioned a few dancers to go home with me for 75 bucks, handed out my phone number 17 times, asked each and everyone of them their real names, if they have boyfriends, if they are bisexual and how much money they have made tonight. While getting a lapdance I reached for the Danger Zones and pretended to not know what I was doing wrong when I got slapped. I was there for three hours and spent 67 dollars, and tried to follow a dancer out when I left.

    Did I do it right, guys? I know I was a little rusty

  2. #2
    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    Quote Originally Posted by Prester_John link=board=8;threadid=12609;start=msg163114#msg163 114 date=1093405043
    I bought one drink which I nursed all night,
    As long as that drink was a water. As JZ stated, its better to bring your own hooch.

    sat away from the stage so I didnt have to tip,
    Ahh, you're bashful. Sit AT the stage and don't tip. When I feel obliged to tip, I hand the dancers a bright shiny new state quarter.

    asked each dancer what I got for my 20 bucks, propositioned a few dancers to go home with me for 75 bucks,
    Good call, although never go above 50 if they insist you wear protection. Try to haggle for 40 or less.

    handed out my phone number 17 times, asked each and everyone of them their real names, if they have boyfriends, if they are bisexual and how much money they have made tonight.
    Good work. Don't forget to use these always sure fire lines:

    "Are those real?"
    "C'mon, you know you want it."
    "Can I stick my finger in there?"

    While getting a lapdance I reached for the Danger Zones and pretended to not know what I was doing wrong when I got slapped.
    That's pretty brazen. I usally try something more stealthy to get my hands on the goods, like fake a bout of Tourette's.

    Oh since you brought it up, in choosing your lap dance attire always go commando. Wear trousers made of the thinest fabric possible. You know how strippers love to do full grinding on parachute pants.

    I was there for three hours and spent 67 dollars, and tried to follow a dancer out when I left.
    A bit too generous on the cash (I personally observe the $10/hour maximum guideline myself) but perfectly explainable after the long hiatus.

    Also, when following a dancer out make sure you know where all the good all night convienence stores are on the route between the club and her place. Dancers are less likely to use mace or file restraining orders against stalker customers who have the consideration to buy them a Big Gulp.

    Did I do it right, guys? I know I was a little rusty
    I'd grade you a B+. As in any endeavor, practice makes perfect, but this SC thing is kind of like riding a bicycle.

    Good to see you're back in the game. Keep us updated.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned


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    God/dess Rhiannon's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    PJ.. Hahahaha!

    But wait a tic.. Did you wear jeans? Did you "Whip it out" during the lap dance?

    Save those tips for next time!


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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    My favorite is to tell a girl that I know dancers are there because they are trying to find boyfriends. The ones that have been there longer, the harder it's beem. Fess up, now.

    >>>Sad<<<
    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

  6. #6
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned



    That be some funny shite!

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    What??!!

    You have failed utterly.

    Or perhaps only forgotten to tell us about that one girl who was so different...

    The one who approached you, even though you were sitting at the bar minding your own business, not even looking at her or trying to talk to her. Who then seemed to really connect with you on a deeper, more personal level than could be possible between a dancer and a customer. She never brought up the idea of a lap dance at all, but when you suggested one she got that special look in her eye that you hadn&#039;t seen before from any of the other girls.

    Who thought you were so special that she couldn&#039;t restrain herself from deep french kissing you constantly during the dance. This was really different, too--she kissed you passionately, while telling you she has just never ever felt this way about a customer before. Then she had seventeen orgasms from rubbing your immense manhood through the parachute pants, and collapsed, shuddering uncontrollably, to the floor.

    She seemed so sad when you left, and got kind of teary-eyed, and wistfully asked you to come back soon since all the other guys failed to understand her completely.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    PJ LMAO that was a hilarious post

    Whats ironic or sad or however you want to look at it, Im sure there are guys who would read your post and say...cool, thats me LOL

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    And don&#039;t forget how the girl thought you were so magnetic, that she bought you all night, talked about marrying someone just like you : . She :smiley: every time she and showed you her . And when you pulled out your big wad

    of ones she . It was k: at first d: . And she gave you a 30 second long . She and you as you went out the door.

    "Now that was a customer!", she said.

    >>>Sad<<<




    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    <S> PJ

    Or perhaps only forgotten to tell us about that one girl who was so different...
    Of course, DJoser is right. Every trip has to have the "different" stripper...
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    Quote Originally Posted by Prester_John link=board=8;threadid=12609;start=msg163114#msg163 114 date=1093405043
    how much money they have made tonight. Did I do it right, guys? I know I was a little rusty
    I always like to ask them that. Some will tell me if I offer them more. But then again, I like to see Dancers with a lot of money. Usually only the ones who met me before and know that desire of mine will tell me. That to me is a real turn on.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Miss_Sierra's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned


  13. #13
    Pamela
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    OMG PJ

    Pamela

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    God/dess whirlerz's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    Luv to give the Mens dollars, luv to see Mens w/dollars, oops wrong board.
    Verf, where da garter(snake) pic?


    MANY MEN WANTED TO LAY ME DOWN, BUT FEW WANTED TO LIFT ME UP

    -Eartha Kitt

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    Veteran Member bloodydewdrop's Avatar
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    Default Re:I..... Have Returned

    You are too funny PJ....but on a more serious note, I&#039;m glad you&#039;re back in the scene if it makes you happy. Plus it&#039;s always great to read you posts :0

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