Results 1 to 25 of 25

Thread: Hottie thoughts.....

  1. #1
    Featured Member Hottie7268's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Boston, MA
    Posts
    805
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Hottie thoughts.....

    If someone's peeing and halfway through they die, would they keep pissing or stop?

    Do the actors in the re-enactments on Americas most wanted, ever get arrested (because they were seen on TV portraying the criminal)?

    If you rented a movie and were late returning it and then you died would someone you knew or a family member have to pay the late fee?

    When French people swear do they say pardon my English?

    If Hooters were to become a door-to-door service would they have to change
    their name to Knockers?

    Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?

    Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?

    Can you get cornered in a round room?

    Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

    Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?

    Can mute people burp?

    Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
    free?

    Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?

    If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?





    Hehehehe









    Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.



  2. #2
    God/dess MojoJojo's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Monkey Land
    Posts
    4,794
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

    Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

    Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

    Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

    Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

    Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

    Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

    How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

    If a 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

    If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

    If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

    If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

    If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

    You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

    Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

    Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

    Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

    You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

    Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

    If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty liter?

    If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?

    How did a fool and his money get together?

    How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

    If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

    What's another word for thesaurus?

    Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

    What do they use to ship styrofoam?

    Why is abbreviation such a long word?

    Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?

    Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

    When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

    Does fuzzy logic tickle?

    Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

    What was the best thing before sliced bread?

    "Experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted."

    If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

    Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?

    What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

    Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?

    Is it possible to be totally partial?

    What's another word for thesaurus?

    If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

    Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

    Why do steam irons have a permanent press setting?

    Can you be a closet claustrophobic?

    Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

    Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

    If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

    If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest, will it make a sound?

    If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

    When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

    Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

    If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

    Why is the word abbreviation so long?

    When companies ship Styrofoam, what do they pack it in?

    If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
    -Humphrey Bogart

    "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
    -Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
    "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
    -His reply

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
    -David Daye

  3. #3
    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    2,143
    Thanks
    48
    Thanked 259 Times in 191 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    LOL!!! Very funny guys. Here are a few more....


    If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

    OK, so what is the speed of dark?

    If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

    If a person is a vegetarian, does she eat animal crackers?

    Why does one have a pair of panties but only one bra?

    Why are they called buildings when they are already finished?

    Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

    Why do banks charge you a "non-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?

    Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

    Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?

    Why do we go under over-passes and over under-passes?

    Why do they call it the Department of the Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


  4. #4
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Hurricane Wasteland,Louisiana
    Posts
    8,088
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 23 Times in 19 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    OMG,these are hilarious!!!
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  5. #5
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    If sound is something we hear, but no one is around to hear it, does the sound still exist?

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  6. #6
    Jay Zeno
    Guest

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    I exhausted my limited stock of cuteisms in Rhia's thread, except for this:


    There are 10 kinds of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don't.

  7. #7
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Hurricane Wasteland,Louisiana
    Posts
    8,088
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 23 Times in 19 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    OMG Jay,I LOVE YOUR WOLF AVATAR!!!
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  8. #8
    God/dess
    Joined
    May 2004
    Posts
    6,336
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 11 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Lol!!
    I love these things!!



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

  9. #9
    God/dess VADEN's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    3,530
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 7 Times in 6 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Still laughing....



  10. #10
    Featured Member scorpio's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Chicago
    Posts
    868
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    who is the first person to find an oyster and say "I think I'll crack this disgusting thing open and see what it tastes like"

  11. #11
    Jay Zeno
    Guest

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164225#msg164 225 date=1093527880
    OMG Jay,I LOVE YOUR WOLF AVATAR!!!
    Better than the panther? Or the lemur???

    Thanks, only! I knew I'd find some avatar that got a response.

  12. #12
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Hurricane Wasteland,Louisiana
    Posts
    8,088
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 23 Times in 19 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Jay Zeno link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164435#msg164 435 date=1093545027
    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164225#msg164 225 date=1093527880
    OMG Jay,I LOVE YOUR WOLF AVATAR!!!
    Better than the panther? Or the lemur???

    Thanks, only! I knew I'd find some avatar that got a response.
    I love all animals,especially the wolf,can't you tell???LOL!!!
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  13. #13
    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    2,143
    Thanks
    48
    Thanked 259 Times in 191 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Hottie7268 link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164118#msg164 118 date=1093504341
    Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
    free?
    Some more redundancies....

    added bonus
    total abstinance
    young children
    exactly right
    subject matter
    revert back
    true fact
    honest truth
    sum total
    join together
    general public
    bare naked
    new initiative
    end result
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


  14. #14
    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    2,143
    Thanks
    48
    Thanked 259 Times in 191 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by MojoJojo link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164127#msg164 127 date=1093506101

    Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
    Hukt on Fonikz Wurkt fur Me.....


    If GH can stand for P as in Hiccough
    If OUGH stands for O as in Dough
    If PHTH stands for T as in Phthisis
    If EIGH stands for A as in Neighbour
    If TTE stands for T as in Gazette
    If EAU stands for O as in Plateau

    Then the right way to spell POTATO is: GHOUGHPHTHEIGHTTEEAU
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


  15. #15
    Veteran Member madison_leigh's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    221
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    How about some oxymorons:


    20. Government Organization
    19. Alone Together
    18. Personal Computer
    17. Silent Scream
    16. Living Dead
    15. Same Difference
    14. Taped Live
    13. Plastic Glasses
    12. Tight Slacks
    11. Peace Force
    10. Pretty Ugly
    9. Head Butt
    8. Working Vacation
    7. Tax Return
    6. Virtual Reality
    5. Dodge Ram
    4. Work Party
    3. Jumbo Shrimp
    2. Healthy Tan
    1. Microsoft Works
    My breasts have a career, I'm just tagging along

    "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but it may be necessary from time to time to give the stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye." -- Miss Piggy

  16. #16
    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    New England
    Posts
    2,143
    Thanks
    48
    Thanked 259 Times in 191 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    LOL Madison, here are a few more.....

    Assitant Supervisor
    New Tradition
    Original Copy
    Plastic Glass
    Uninvited Guest
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


  17. #17
    Veteran Member madison_leigh's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    221
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    My breasts have a career, I'm just tagging along

    "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but it may be necessary from time to time to give the stupid or misinformed beholder a black eye." -- Miss Piggy

  18. #18
    God/dess
    Joined
    May 2004
    Posts
    6,336
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 11 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by verfolgung link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164489#msg164 489 date=1093550945
    LOL Madison, here are a few more.....

    Assitant Supervisor
    New Tradition
    Original Copy
    Plastic Glass
    Uninvited Guest
    Military Intelligence!!!

    (My dad's favorite, which is funny cause that's what he did...)



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

  19. #19
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    1st Annual

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  20. #20
    Jay Zeno
    Guest

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Dodge Ram.

  21. #21
    God/dess Silverback's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    On board the Kobayashi Maru
    Posts
    2,387
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164213#msg164 213 date=1093525596
    If sound is something we hear, but no one is around to hear it, does the sound still exist?
    If a man speaks and a woman's not there to hear it, is he still wrong?
    "He will come in one of the pre-chosen forms. During the rectification of the Vuldrini, the traveler came as a large and moving Torg! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the McKetrick supplicants, they chose a new form for him: that of a giant Slor! Many Shuvs and Zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the depths of the Slor that day, I can tell you!"

  22. #22
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Silverback link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164851#msg164 851 date=1093588046
    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette link=board=1;threadid=12687;start=msg164213#msg164 213 date=1093525596
    If sound is something we hear, but no one is around to hear it, does the sound still exist?
    If a man speaks and a woman's not there to hear it, is he still wrong?
    LOL!

    Yes. Definitely. The man is ALWAYS wrong.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  23. #23
    God/dess kitana's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    kentucky
    Posts
    3,582
    Thanks
    49
    Thanked 60 Times in 43 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Ok guys I only have one that hasen't already been said, so here goes.

    If a tree falls in the wood and noone is around to hear it, do the other trees laugh?

    I know it's lame, but it's late.

    Kitana
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
    Quote Originally Posted by ExoticEngineer View Post
    Feel like a damn salt lick at the goats petting zoo!
    <08SM>

  24. #24
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Okay.. I have to add to mine...

    if light reflects color.. and there is no light making something black, isn&#039;t everything black to begin with?


    [/URL]
    [/URL]



  25. #25
    God/dess MojoJojo's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Monkey Land
    Posts
    4,794
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re:Hottie thoughts.....

    Color, like sound, is essentially our interpretation. Color to a bull, for example, is different due to inability to see red (for one). So "red" is not "red" on its own, but rather how we typically view something and define it as being "red".

    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
    -Humphrey Bogart

    "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
    -Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
    "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
    -His reply

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
    -David Daye

Similar Threads

  1. Attn: HOTTIE!
    By Jessica1001 in forum Camming Connection
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 01-04-2012, 10:12 AM
  2. Pics of you and your hottie
    By GothicAlien in forum Picture Post
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-06-2011, 04:36 PM
  3. Doctor Hottie.
    By PaigeDWinter in forum Body Business
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 11-13-2006, 04:10 PM
  4. Hottie- Where the hell are you???
    By Gynger in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-16-2005, 07:14 AM
  5. For Hottie
    By VADEN in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-06-2004, 11:35 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •