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Thread: desperation.

  1. #1
    God/dess Mare's Avatar
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    Default desperation.

    You ever notice how when you NEED to make $ you don't/can't because the guys sense it.Just when you think they're only paying attention to tits and ass.Why do they have to sense that?I am not desperate now,but have been.I was talking to my friend about it the other day.

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    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Yeah...it's like when you're single, no good guys...when you're attached.. well, still none, but they look better! lol, j/k.

    Definitely body language has something to do with it- not the big overt things like arm crossing or slouching, but maybe just holding the head at a different angle, looking less relaxed, who knows? Could be anything.

    It is annoying...which is why I try not to sweat it either way. Which works for and against me...it definitely makes me money some nights, but some nights it just gives me a rationalization for being lazy.

    Feature costumes for sale!

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    Member Sherrill's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Absolutely! This phenomenon drives me nuts. They're affected by your mood no matter how much you try to cover it up with a smile and act normal. A bad mood=more rejections=a worse mood, vicious cycle there. Maybe our pheremones are different, sending subliminal messages to our customers (Do not say yes to a private dance, do not say yes, do not say yes.)

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    Default Re:desperation.

    or it could be the look in the eyes that says talk to me muthafucker and your balls go in the garbagecan

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    Default Re:desperation.

    Quote Originally Posted by scarlett_vancouver link=board=27;threadid=13025;start=msg169174#msg16 9174 date=1094212976
    Yeah...it's like when you're single, no good guys...when you're attached.. well, still none, but they look better! lol, j/k.

    Definitely body language has something to do with it- not the big overt things like arm crossing or slouching, but maybe just holding the head at a different angle, looking less relaxed, who knows? Could be anything.

    It is annoying...which is why I try not to sweat it either way. Which works for and against me...it definitely makes me money some nights, but some nights it just gives me a rationalization for being lazy.
    i agree with the single thing kind of. When im single i end up meeting women with shitty attitudes. Then you meet a nice one and the other nice ones come out of the woodwork all over the place.

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    Veteran Member goldclubbing's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Its the same in any sales job. Attitude is everything I tell my guys.

    If I managed a strip club I'd have the housemoms pep talk the girls before their shift to get them in the mood...and if their not...adjust attitude or go home...

    And you CAN smell desperation in strippers and all sales people who work on 100% commission or tips. I for one am there to get away from my own attitude about my customers and hate to be reminded of them by a stripper having a bad day.

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Yeah...if you stop focusing on how much money you need to make tonight, tomorrow, this weekend, whatever and just go in and have a good time...you'll make money...otherwise, usually, you come off as impatient (I can't sit and bullshit...I need to make money NOW), or as completely desperate. There was one dancer that I worked with that would always sit down and tell customers how much money she needed to make and how she's not even close to making it...

    Don't make your problems, worries, troubles your customers. Just put them aside and you'll see a difference in your earnings.

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    Default Re:desperation.

    Lol.

    "The grass is always greener..."



    Because there ain't no tits on the radio

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    Featured Member Wwanderer's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    I think the basic issue is that really convincing acting is a lot harder than many people, dancers in the context of this thread, think. Most people can't do it very well even in a formal theatre type situation where the script is fixed and rehearsed many times, other characters and props are supporting the illusion, the audience is passive and "out there" well away from you, etc. It is far far tougher to do it on an interactive and ad lib basis up-close and personal with your "audience"/customer. This is why it is so hard to hide one's mood as Sherrill noted above and why the only real solution is to try to get oneself into a different mood, even if only temporarily.

    -Ww
    "At this moment what more need we seek?
    As the Truth eternally reveals itself,
    This very place is the Lotus Land of Purity,
    This very body is the Body of the Buddha."
    - Zazen Wasan

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    God/dess NinaDaisy's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    I wonder for some girls how much of that attitude is brought upon themselves by only working when they "need" to. Most clubs have quite a few dancers that only pop in a few times a month and each time, especially at the end of the month, they're scrambling for money.

    I try to force myself to come in a certain number of times a week to avoid getting in that mode. It's happened once or twice this year, both this summer, which was shitty, but I turned it around and it worked quite well for me! I went into full on hustle mode instead and one of the nights I made $1,400 and the other I made $700.

    My biggest problem is getting downtrodden from repeated rejection. Truthfully, I don't typically get turned down for dances much , but one night that I was working in Alaska I couldn't get one to save my life ! Although I'm so not the type that hides out in the dressing room and bitches, that's what I did for about a half hour. I read for a bit, calmed down a bit and went back down with a better attitude. The night wasn't great, but it was a lot better than if I had just given up and let it get to me.
    "She has written so well, and marvellously well, that I was completely ashamed of myself as a writer...But this girl, who is to my knowledge very unpleasant and we might even say a high-grade bitch, can write rings around all of us who consider ourselves as writers"

    Ernest Hemingway on writer, aviation pioneer and horse trainer Beryl Markham


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    Featured Member GnBeret's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    If it's any comfort at all, ya'll should know it works the same damned way on this side of the fence!
    "That's your answer Old Man? I guess you're a Hard Case too...."
    - Luke
    "Some men, you just can't reach...."
    - Boss, re Luke

    If there's one thing in my life these years have taught me,
    it's that you can always see it coming, but you can never stop it.
    -Cowboy Junkies

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    Default Re:desperation.

    Quote Originally Posted by scarlett_vancouver link=board=27;threadid=13025;start=msg169174#msg16 9174 date=1094212976
    .

    Definitely body language has something to do with it- not the big overt things like arm crossing or slouching, but maybe just holding the head at a different angle, looking less relaxed, who knows? Could be anything.

    I think this has a lot to do with it. I have been depressed and know that I act like this and when I do everyone lets me know it. People sence these things very well I really don't think there is anything you can do about it just hope you get over what ever it is bothering you. I TRY just to be happy no matter whats going on. I guess the older you get the more you realize that you will get over it and it will pass. Only time will tell.
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Oh boy.. this is right!

    Since I went to two nights a week, my earnings are better- there really was never a problem before. Before, I was doing an average of 35-42 dances per night.. now I"m doing anywhere from 45-60 on the average.. my mood is better because I don't act like I need the money I guess. I just simply do not care whether I get a dance or not anymore.. probably because I am slowly phasing myself out of this.

    But, if you allow your mood to affect you, your earnings will be dramatically affected and result in you being grumpy, upset and emotional.


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    Senior Member LeanneCiccone's Avatar
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    Default Re:desperation.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wwanderer link=board=27;threadid=13025;start=msg169428#msg16 9428 date=1094243939
    I think the basic issue is that really convincing acting is a lot harder than many people, dancers in the context of this thread, think. Most people can't do it very well even in a formal theatre type situation where the script is fixed and rehearsed many times, other characters and props are supporting the illusion, the audience is passive and "out there" well away from you, etc. It is far far tougher to do it on an interactive and ad lib basis up-close and personal with your "audience"/customer. This is why it is so hard to hide one's mood as Sherrill noted above and why the only real solution is to try to get oneself into a different mood, even if only temporarily.

    -Ww
    Wow, that is SO true.
    Leanne

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