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Thread: A Sweet Ass Story

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    Veteran Member lethalsoul's Avatar
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    Default A Sweet Ass Story

    A Sweet Ass Story

    It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar.

    I saw Miss Hershey standing behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and Fifth Avenue when I whipped out my Whopper and whispered, “Hey Sweetheart, how'd you like to Crunch on my big hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?�

    Well, she immediately went down on my Tootsie Roll, and it was like pure Almond Joy!

    I couldn't help but grab her delicious Mounds because it was easy to see that this little Twix had the Red Hots.

    It was all I could do to hold the Snickers and Crackle as my Butterfinger went up her tight little Kit Kat and she started to scream “Oh Henry, Oh Henry!�

    Soon she was fondling my Peter Pan and ZagNut and I knew it wouldn't be long before I blew my Milk Duds clear to Mars that gave her a taste of the old Milky Way.

    She asked me if I was into M&M, but I said, “Hey Chicklet, no kinky stuff.� I said, “Look you little Reese's Pieces, don't be a Zero, be a Lifesaver. Why don't you take my Whatchamacallit and slip it up your Bit 'O' Honey?�

    (What a piece of Juicy Fruit she was, too!)

    She screamed, “Oh Crackerjack, better than the Three Musketeers!� as I rammed my Ding Dong up her Rocky Road and into her Peanut Butter Cup.

    Well, I was giving it to her Good 'N' Plenty, when all the sudden... my Starburst!

    Yeah, as luck would have it, she started to grow Chunky and complained of a Wrigley in her stomach.

    Sure enough, nine months later, out popped? Baby Ruth!
    lethalsoul

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    God/dess Malibu's Avatar
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    Default Re:A Sweet Ass Story

    Heard that one before but boy, does that storyteller definitely know his candy!
    You are the envy
    of all parallel lines that
    dream of curves and convergence
    - Sara Bailey: Sieve of Words

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    God/dess VADEN's Avatar
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    Default Re:A Sweet Ass Story




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    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re:A Sweet Ass Story

    I think i got a cavity just reading that.

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    God/dess MojoJojo's Avatar
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    Default Re:A Sweet Ass Story

    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
    -Humphrey Bogart

    "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
    -Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
    "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
    -His reply

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
    -David Daye

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    Featured Member Crystal_eyes's Avatar
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    Default Re:A Sweet Ass Story

    Hahaha cute !

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