Crystalstarfire, you are my kind of girl. Your attitude is exactly what I look for (and rarely find) when I go clubbing. Ladies, if you want to know how to treat a customer, please read her post. Thanks.
Crystalstarfire, you are my kind of girl. Your attitude is exactly what I look for (and rarely find) when I go clubbing. Ladies, if you want to know how to treat a customer, please read her post. Thanks.
Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)
Fondl--are you married? And if so do you share your experiences and desires and fantasies with her? I'm just curious.
I for one have been on the edge for a long time but in a socially responsible good citizen sort of way...married, children, business owner on one side, freaky druggy sex addict on the other...yin and yang together...I have always loved strip clubs and naked girls...every one is a new mystery....but it was always causual...until I had a major life changing experience...then it became an outlet to hang out for awhile with someone I liked but didn't have any responsibilty for and could act with her any way I wanted without commitment. It was safe and we could talk for hours about stuff that was lite....I was in crisis...not a mid life one...just the rug being pulled out from under you kind...and believe it or not I am thankful I met the person I did because she didn't take advantage of me...naked therapist with a great ass.
Goldclubbing, yes, no. Actually I used to try sharing my thoughts with my wife but it made her very uncomfortable so I stopped. She has an image of me that is very flattering but not entirely accurate, and when I deviate from that image she gets upset. And when I don't I get upset. Which is what my original post on this thread is all about.
Sounds like you and I have had very similar experiences. My ATF has always acted as my therapist and vice versa, which is why we ended up becoming very close friends. When we met we were both suffering from depression, now neither one of us does. And I think that our friendship was the main reason for us both getting over it. I too am thankful that I met her.
Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)
FONDL, it's interesting that you use the "mask" analogy to describe how you suppress the "true you." In your scenario, the mask is the conservative, responsible businessman, while the real person struggles to break out from underneath.
I was waiting for Madcap to say this, but "The Mask" is the same story on the big screen. The only difference is that the mask in the film is the liberating force -- it brings out the true person inside. Same internal battle.
I think many of us struggle with this. I certainly do. My professional life (which includes a VERY visible public image in the media) is totally at odds with the passionate, rebellious, inflammatory part of me that comes alive in the clubs. I have to walk a very thin line of propriety to keep the two parts of my life in balance.
There is also another level. I was educated into the upper class, but grew up very blue-collar. I never want to lose that part of me that is blue-collar -- kind, frank, gutsy, unpretentious, forgiving, struggling -- they are all part of my soul that nobody has been able to educate out of me. My ex was frankly embarrassed by this part of me and totally unforgiving about it. Most of the narrow-mindedness of the upper class is just a mind trap; a form of coercive control. We have to resist falling into it.
TOO, that's very interesting, especially the blue-collar white-collar thing. I grew up in a blue-collar family and was always embarrassed by it when I was younger. I became highly educated in part to join the white-collar world. But then a funny thing happened, I discovered how boring and phoney the white collar world often is and found that I often prefer the company of blue-collar people. Interesting.
I never saw the movie "The Mask" and didn't know that's what it was about. My experiece was that when I was little my parents always expected me to be this perfect person and I got used to being him and did pretty well at it. But later in life I discovered that wasn't who I really am. I still wear masks around family and some friends but at least now I'm conscious of it and as a result it doesn't bother me as much. In fact it can be kind of fun, for example at a neighborhood cocktail party I'll sometimes say something totally out of character (that is out of character for the mask that I'm wearing.) Something like saying that I favor legalization of prostitution. One of my favorites is when some boring woman is going on and on about how the government has no right to tell a woman what she can and cannot do with her reproductive organs, I'll say something like, "Oh, so you favor legalization of prostitution?" and then I'll tell her that I do too. It's fun to watch the reaction.
Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)
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