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Thread: Dating DJs and bouncers

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    Default Dating DJs and bouncers

    Please excuse me if this topic has been brought up before - I looked but didn't see one...
    I'm new to dancing so I'm not too sure about all the do's and don'ts yet. I've been involved with one of the djs at work and I'm sure all the girls have found out by now, but I'm wondering if I am putting his job at stake by leaving with him at night? I know each club has different rules but I don't want to get him - or me- in trouble. Is it generally a bad idea to go home with dj's or bouncers? From what I hear, it happens all the time. Is this true? Thanks for any replies as I am very confused about what I should do.

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    Member Briar's Avatar
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    From what my sister says (she's the dancer) the DJ's get plenty of play. I would stay clear of a guy that gets hit on daily by a gruop of girls that may or may not have esteem issues. (not that all dancers do mind you)

    Ther are a billion boys or girls on this rock of a planet....find one that is in a healthy place and not surrounded by the devil's apple of temptation.

    I work with two DJ's, they DOGS!!!!!!!


    Just thought I might drop my two cents in

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    God/dess erotictonic's Avatar
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    DJs for the most part are dogs. Some of them break the mold. Be careful. Most DJ/dancer relationships don't last long.

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    Veteran Member azamber's Avatar
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Personally, I have always avoided relationships with DJ's and management/owners, but twice I went home with bouncers in moments of weakness, back in the first few years I started dancing. We didn't have any problems from those encounters, but I don't think it's a good idea to mix business and pleasure, ESPECIALLY in this environment. I used to think that customers were fair game (I know, I know, save your criticism!), but I have learned, and only recently, that it doesn't work for me. Sometimes it works for other people, but more often than not, relationships starting out in this environment don't work/aren't healthy, or don't start at all! As for whether or not you'll get in trouble, probably not. Many male employees are involved with dancers.

    In response to the other posts, couldn't the same be said of dancers if you substitute that for the DJ? I understand where you are coming from, but this industry is oversaturated with negative stereotypes. And I think I'm single partly because of all the guys who feel that I'm not "in a healthy place" because I am a dancer. We all do this to make money, not because we're fucked up.

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    If your club has rules about DJs/dancers dating then follow those. I've seen these realtionships blow up, causing problems at work. If you do end up in a realtionship with him realize that part of his job is flirting with the girls, that's part of how he makes his money, and the same for you. One DJ/dancer couple I worked with the dancer couldn't handle this and it caused numerous fights at work which ends up fucking up everybody.

    There are some instances whre it does work out. I've been married to my DJ for almost 5 years. It doesn't bother me if other girls flirt with him, I know where his heart is and ditto for me with him. Sometimes it can be a blessing to have someone who understands the bussiness.

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    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Quote Originally Posted by clover link=board=27;threadid=13772;start=msg180593#msg18 0593 date=1096008636
    Is it generally a bad idea to go home with dj's or bouncers?
    In my opinion it's bad business to go home with anyone you work with.Dating a dj or a bouncer is just asking for trouble for either him or you from management, and/or the other dancers....

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    from a $$ point of view, at the very least you should try to be discreet. you just don't know about jealous dancers, his ex-lovers, how it will affect your money, or some other guy working there feeling like you're easy and that he should get some from you, too. and the last thing you need is for customers to think they're hanging out with you and your "boyfriend" or lover is standing there watching and most clubs have a few girls who will be more than happy to tell this to a customer who's getting worked up over you.

    good luck with the whole thing. i've known some new girls who felt "special" like the dj or bouncer can have anyone in the club... and picked her instead. my experience has always been that men who work at clubs have had the absolute best training in how to be a player. yes it's a stereotype but in this case, it happens often enough to warrant some extra care.

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    Rebuildme
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Argh, the whole co-worker thing is always a bad idea no matter what the venue...........

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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    It's definately a good thing to go home with a bouncer every now and then. I mean, heck, they are big, strong guys... there to protect you. Out on the floor to be seen, etc.etc. If ya ever get a stalker or have a problem, you know they'll be there for ya.

    Now those candy-ass DJ's... it's no wonder they keep their skinny, scrawny asses all boxed up in a booth out of sight. They got the job hoping to score since they've never hit a gym in their lives. And if trouble ever did befall ya', what are they gonna do? Defend you with their Duran Duran collection.. or just lock all the doors, put Achy Breaky Heart on repeat and hope they just go away?



    (Note- this post was in no way serious.. Just jabs at my many pal DJ's as restitution for all the &#039uh, where's da football?' rivalry comedy we enjoy so much. hehe)
    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    I feel that dating and relationship building comes from attraction and connection.

    Sometimes it works out and othertimes the relationships are short lived.

    You can't really put a rule on dating at work because in life many people meet at work.

    And some clubs don't care about who dates who. I worked at a club where a dancer and DJ were engaged and got married right after I quit. Everyone knew they were involved and it was no big deal.

    In other clubs gossip and politics can interfere.

    I wouldn't make a rule of not dating someone in a club, but just realize that some DJ's are never going to be serious, and in some clubs you must be discreet or risk being fired.

    Limits of where you meet someone you date can never work because as I said you can't pinpoint where you will meet someone you are attracted to.

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Quote Originally Posted by polecat link=board=27;threadid=13772;start=msg180891#msg18 0891 date=1096062958
    Now those candy-ass DJ's... it's no wonder they keep their skinny, scrawny asses all boxed up in a booth out of sight. They got the job hoping to score since they've never hit a gym in their lives. And if trouble ever did befall ya', what are they gonna do? Defend you with their Duran Duran collection.. or just lock all the doors, put Achy Breaky Heart on repeat and hope they just go away?



    Dude I would NEVER use my Duran Duran collection to defend a dancer! If trouble DOES happen to break out I look for the biggest neanderthal.... oops I forgot I'm talking to a bouncer: Me look for big dumb guy so him get punched and me stay safe...

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    At my club one of the dancers is dating one of the managers. This manager is a total sleaze ball and has hit on me and several other dancers.
    He once said to me ''god you have such nice tits I would love to suck on them''
    fUCKING SICK
    One of the door guys who is about 50 is dating one of the dancers who is 21 and addicted to coke and guess who her dealer is? Her bf.
    Then we have the girl who people pay to get in she is dating the vip host and he is cheating on her with one of the dancers
    My club is like a soap opera.
    It is stressful to even work anymore becouse it's all gossip and cattiness.
    And everyone talks behind everyone's back.
    I actually hate going to work. I get really stressed whenever I even think about which is why I have barely been in at all this month.
    I just can't handle all the drama. It makes me to unhappy in my personal life.


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    I believe you Dottie and you have my support






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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Thanks for all your input! I in no way want an actual relationship with this guy, as I know he is probably a player and flirts with all the girls. I totally relate to what ccgirl said about feeling "special" because I know he could have anyone but picked me. Right now its fun, but I don't expect it to last. I just don't want either of us to get fired. Thanks again!

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Good thinking clover. I would say don't get too involved. Relationships between co-workers hardly ever work out, especially in the strip club industry. The DJ's and bouncers are supposed to be nice to all of the dancers and in this business, it's easy to misinterpret being nice as flirting. It's easy to get jealous if you are involved with the DJ or bouncer and you feel like he is flirting with another dancer.

    If you feel that you can date and/or fuck one of your co-workers and be mature and discreet about it, then go ahead, but it's much easier said than done. I have slept with a DJ before (we weren't dating, but we would hook up every once in a while, I hadn't gotten laid in forever and I was horny) and I started to develop feelings for the guy. A couple of months later, I heard that he has hooked up with several other dancers. I never did find out if it was true or not; I didn't really want to confront him about it. It really hurt my feelings.

    In addition to the problems I already mentioned, the other dancers will most likely be pissed off if they find out that you are dating or sleeping with a DJ or bouncer. They could tell the customers, and it is a turnoff to the customers that they are spending a lot of money on a dancer and she is banging the bouncer or the DJ. There are rare cases where the relationship works out fine, but more often than not, it doesn't work out. It just causes too much drama.






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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    Quote Originally Posted by Magdalena_666 link=board=27;threadid=13772;start=msg181011#msg18 1011 date=1096074553
    At my club one of the dancers is dating one of the managers. This manager is a total sleaze ball and has hit on me and several other dancers.
    He once said to me ''god you have such nice tits I would love to suck on them''
    fUCKING SICK
    One of the door guys who is about 50 is dating one of the dancers who is 21 and addicted to coke and guess who her dealer is? Her bf.
    Then we have the girl who people pay to get in she is dating the vip host and he is cheating on her with one of the dancers
    My club is like a soap opera.
    It is stressful to even work anymore becouse it's all gossip and cattiness.
    And everyone talks behind everyone's back.
    I actually hate going to work. I get really stressed whenever I even think about which is why I have barely been in at all this month.
    I just can't handle all the drama. It makes me to unhappy in my personal life.
    perfect example why that rule is followed at many clubs.Its not just the players who are effected.

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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    I have dated both and it brought me nothing but heartache... rt: A couple good orgasms though! LOL

    The dj's are usually good with their hands and the bouncers are always good for the power thing and control over you in bed..



  17. #17
    Glamazon
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    Default Re:Dating DJs and bouncers

    In my six years, I have never dated anyone from my own club or from the industry. When other ladies (or the support staff, for that matter) ask advice about it, I always tell them "Don't shit where you sleep."

    Unfortunately in my city, the 3 food/beverage clubs are very incestuous, meaning there is alot of intermingling with the staff and dancers from all 3 clubs. So my question is this: What should one's policy be in this situation? Oh, and by the way, all 3 clubs are owned by the same company.

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