What attributes do you look for in a woman?k:
Also, what is the one thing or few things that would make you commit to her & not commiting to her?
In other words....
What do you look for in a woman in general?![]()
: :kiss:





What attributes do you look for in a woman?k:
Also, what is the one thing or few things that would make you commit to her & not commiting to her?
In other words....
What do you look for in a woman in general?![]()
: :kiss:
Hubby says:
An indefinable click. Absent that everything else could be in order: face, eyes, beauty, intelligence. All components adding tonothing without the click.
Commit=trust
not-commit=inability to believe
I should preface this by saying that I have no set type of woman; to do so would be self-limiting, because I love women, and there's so damn many great, different women out there. Women are one of two reasons I wouldn't mind living forever--they just keep cranking out new ones all the time.What attributes do you look for in a woman?
That said, things that are a plus:
--A fully functioning frontal lobe and cerebral cortex; I'm so done with vapid chicks. I went that route for three years because she was dead sexy and gave me something I couldn't get enough of like no one else could--like a fat bastard gorging himself on a perpetual buffet table, and it was incredibly degrading and frustrating--like hauling said fat bastard out of his apartment through a hole cut in the wall. I can't bring myself to do that again.
--Respect of my space; the basic acknowledgement that there are things in my life--maybe a lot of things--that I don't need to share with her in order to conduct a relationship. This is tough to find.
--Pragmatism over pretense and pomposity; life is not a friggin' Louis Vuitton or Dolce and Gabbana catalog.
--Acceptance and contentedness; not only in life in general, but don't try changing me--others have tried and all have failed. Miserably.
--Highly, highly sexed; I've learned the hard way that trying to pretend you can gloss over sexual incompatibilities in appetite, predilections and attitudes is a total non-sequitor.
--Knows the value of:
Silence; appreciating that some things are better left unsaid and the recognition of when that axiom applies.
Secrecy; being able to discern that which should not be repeated.
Reciprocity; knowing what it means and when to engage in it.
I'm pretty flexible on the physical component, but it should be said that a nice rack and an ass you can bounce quarters off of doesn't hurt.
In an intriguing dichotomy, I very much enjoy and prefer the comfort of long-term relationships over any form of dating, but the very concept of permanence disturbs me greatly.Also, what is the one thing or few things that would make you commit to her & not commiting to her?
Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.
William F. Buckley, Jr.
shit... you know, I was going reply, but for obvious reasons, I always feel like an idiot when I post after CO.
Damn you CO... damn you and your Mensa vocabulary
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Perfect....Originally Posted by Big D link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181054#msg181 054 date=1096081495
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LOL...Originally Posted by A_Guy link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181074#msg181 074 date=1096083299
Seriously, I had to pull out a dictionary...LOL! But that was great CO. Thanks for replying your honesty.![]()
why don't you find out what YOU like and want in a...'man'...then look for that...your likes, wants, and needs are more important...aren't they?
Why do some people still have to fight...to get the same opportunities...that are given to others??...
Look out for self...because noone else will...AND
The greatest revenge in the world...is success...
Reclusivness...is a good thing.





Absolutely hun. I'm just curious to hear their side, since i've never heard of what men want.Originally Posted by Topaz link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181223#msg181 223 date=1096121775
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well...that's easy...
they want multiple young, hot bodied sex partners...that they can do whatever they want to do...whenever they want to do it...to them...
fidelity...commitment...loyalty...are all dirty words...and they'll take flight in a New York minute when mentioned...marriage and kids?...don't even go there...
hope this helps...![]()
Why do some people still have to fight...to get the same opportunities...that are given to others??...
Look out for self...because noone else will...AND
The greatest revenge in the world...is success...
Reclusivness...is a good thing.





Sorry, but you lost me on the flight to New York...LOL! ???Originally Posted by Topaz link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181232#msg181 232 date=1096123055
i ment they'll be gone faster than you can blink...out of there in a heartbeat...etc...sorry for the confusion darlin'...
Why do some people still have to fight...to get the same opportunities...that are given to others??...
Look out for self...because noone else will...AND
The greatest revenge in the world...is success...
Reclusivness...is a good thing.
Topaz is a little bitter, Darlin'.
That's because you weren't flying the embittered and misandristic skies with Topaz airlines.Sorry, but you lost me on the flight to New York...LOL!
Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.
William F. Buckley, Jr.





It's ok babes, gotcha.Originally Posted by Topaz link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181240#msg181 240 date=1096124444
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I don't "look" for anything in particular. I do seem to be drawn to intelligence, kindness, integrity, and an interest in justice. I like someone with some common ground, although enough differences to be a teacher, as well as the interest in being a learner. I like someone who is soft, but tough, can show weakness but be strong, love for everyone's life but impatience for the cruel.................and I don't take flights to NY.
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
-His reply
"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
-David Daye





and I don't take flights to NY.
I've stayed away from your posts since the begining Topaz cuz I realize that being a guy means my opinion means jackshit to you, but I HAVE to quote this post and defend my gender :shudder: Not all guys are like this, I for one ALWAYS wanted to get married and have kids, and even though mine drive me nuts I've never been happier.Originally Posted by Topaz link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181232#msg181 232 date=1096123055
Granted there are quite a few assholes out there but there are a few(unfortunately VERY few) decent guys out there who relish commitment....
Now on to the subject of this thread...What attributes do I look for in a woman?
A sense of humour it may sound funny but my idol is Bozo the Clown so I love to laugh
Intelligence I'm actually kinda smart and when I feel like bustin out big words I want the one I'm with to be able to understand me and be able to carry on a conversation
Independence I don't want a woman who depends on me to tell her where to go what to eat etc...
Attitude I'm from the hood, I like a woman to be able to go toe to toe with me verbally and NOT be afraid to be a total bitch when it's neccessary
[b]A sense of herself]/b] I want a woman who is happy in her own skin, I know who and what I am and so should she.
There are a lot more but these are the important ones. I've dated fat women, thin women, black and white women etc and if these weren't present the relationship ultimately failed, Deanna has all of these attributes and then some...
We trust each other completely and we know what we want for ourselves and our family, and how to get it without stepping on each others toes





Fellas, as much as you don't like Topaz's post....keep in mind(from her posts i've read) she's gone through some really rough situations with men. I know you guys don't like her posts towards men, but at least understand where she is coming from.
Hugs to her.....![]()
Ok, lets stick back to the subject.![]()
I understand that her opinion is going to be different than mine, and I respect that.....Originally Posted by Vyanka link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181299#msg181 299 date=1096131389
As far as liking her posts towards men, it's not my place to like OR dislike since I have never walked a step in her shoes, and hope my quoting her post didn't come across as an attack or anything of that nature, but if it did I'm sorry![]()





Not at all.Originally Posted by Blade is a D.j. link=board=1;threadid=13800;start=msg181321#msg181 321 date=1096133337
No worries, just wanted the fellas to be aware if they weren't.
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Since joining this board I have been well aware of Topaz's opinion towards men. I respect the fact that everyone has their own opinions and feel they are entitled to them. When grouped with all men, however, I may have a tendency to defend myself...as it is, in fact, a direct attack.I know you guys don't like her posts towards men, but at least understand where she is coming from.
However, I realize nothing I say will make a difference, so I resort to lame humor.
"The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
-Humphrey Bogart
"Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
-Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
"Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
-His reply
"If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
-David Daye
OK hubby says, He want honesty, laughter, intelligence, comittment, good ass, someone to talk to, to confide in a best friend and a lover at the same time.
As for my take on what he wants, "something to drink and he would like to see something naked"
Kitana
It's a good thing all the ladies on this board are wildly, screamingly, roll-over-and-bray-at-the-moon, take-your-ever-lovin'-breath-away gorgeous. It makes it a lot easier to move right on to the other important things.
As we all know, right out of the gate, guys are pretty hopeless around really stunning women. That bolt of electricity just totally ignores all higher cognitive functions, logic, reason, and intelligence and drops a bomb on the neocortex. Mix that in with a persistent testosterone cocktail, well-behaved men with disposable income and a finely-tuned appreciation for the better things in life, particularly exquisite ladies, and boom! The strip club industry.![]()
OK, more seriously. I've often thought that it must be an endless pain in the ass for beautiful women to have to deal with the barrage of guys coming on to them at all times, day and night. The problem for good-looking guys is completely different in my experience -- it only becomes a pain in the ass at parties or other occasions where the wallflower girls begin to drink really seriously. Once they pass the embarrassment threshold, you have to keep a really careful eye on them through peripheral vision or you will find yourself backed into the wall by side-attacking, slurring, giggling women in full-blast confessional mode, complete with rub-up-against-every-part-of-my-body subtlety.
That, of course, is such a great turn-on.At least guys don't have to deal with it all the time.
Beautiful women have many more choices in finding guys for serious relationships because of their physical magnetism, but I'm not sure it makes it any easier. In fact, I think the constant line of guys out the door might actually make it harder. There are that many more opportunities for "the spark" or "that special chemistry" to sweep a beautiful woman away into some hopeless badboy relationship before she can find out what she needs to know, which is whether this guy is a really special friend. That's really what it comes down to. And it takes time to find this out. Honesty, integrity, humor, supportiveness, kindness, compassion, dedication and every single other quality of a friendship must be there in spades for a loving relationship to spark into existence, survive the first few weeks and eventually grow stronger.
Friends first, lovers later.
Find a friend and let it grow into something special.
What is important
Alrighty.. Let's not slam Topaz here, k?
She has her reasons and past experiences for feeling the way she does towards men, and she has every right to express them.
Blade & Vyanka said it best. Until anyone has been what she's been through, you won't know how she feels. Just let it go.
This is by far, a very interesting thread.. I need to think some more before I post a response... lots of interesting things to think about..
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