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Thread: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    It's always intelligence and humor...over and over again. Ask any woman what she's looking for in a man, and she'll say "oh, I don't care about looks all that much, I just like a smart guy with a sense of humor who treats me well."

    This is usually followed by some complaint about their asshole thug of a boyfriend who stole money to buy one of his other girlfriends an abortion or other such soap-opera melodrama. Why is it so hard to be honest with yourselves? Just say: "I like assholes because they're exciting challenges who offer endless room for complaint to my girlfriends, thus avoiding any and all introspection that might reveal some personal flaw I would then have to take responsibility for." Repeat as necessary.

    All bitter ranting aside, "challenge" makes up about 90-95% of what attracts a woman to a man. Whether they know this and don't want to admit it, or simply haven't realized it yet themselves, I'm not sure...but it is very accurate.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    All bitter ranting aside, "challenge" makes up about 90-95% of what attracts a woman to a man. Whether they know this and don't want to admit it, or simply haven't realized it yet themselves, I'm not sure...but it is very accurate.
    Its the "Bad Boy" syndrome Stat. Thats why I have never been sucessful with the ladies. Who would be interested in a 50'ish guy with glasses and a pocket protector ???

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Veteran Member Naomi_Tx's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    Lesat1, I'd typed out this long response to you above post, basically saying that you couldn't be more wrong. Just as I was about to post it the phone rang, it was my asshole on/off BF. Need I say more?

    Damn you lesat! I hate to be proven wrong.

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    Default Re: Fair is fair


    All bitter ranting aside, "challenge" makes up about 90-95% of what attracts a woman to a man. Whether they know this and don't want to admit it, or simply haven't realized it yet themselves, I'm not sure...but it is very accurate.
    Damn! Lestat! You are right on this one. I'd put it more at 70-80% but it isn't worth arguing about. LOL. With your knowledge, you shouldn't have to do any bitter ranting.
    When the man says, "I do," it is the happiest day of her life.-Al Bundy

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair


    Its the "Bad Boy" syndrome Stat. Thats why I have never been sucessful with the ladies. Who would be interested in a 50'ish guy with glasses and a pocket protector ???

    FBR
    You'd be surprised what some ladies will overlook when the guy with glasses and a pocket protector has a sufficiently large bank account.

    I suppose us "nerds" win out in the end, but I'm gonna have to have a talk with the man upstairs about this. Just doesn't seem right.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    It's always intelligence and humor...over and over again. Ask any woman what she's looking for in a man, and she'll say "oh, I don't care about looks all that much, I just like a smart guy with a sense of humor who treats me well."
    oh and bad boys never did it for me. Stable and secure, thoughtful with a good dash of romance and humor is the perfect man in my book.
    Interesting.

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    Lesat1, I'd typed out this long response to you above post, basically saying that you couldn't be more wrong. Just as I was about to post it the phone rang, it was my asshole on/off BF. Need I say more?

    Damn you lesat! I hate to be proven wrong.
    Aww, well now I'm kinda curious about what you were going to say Naomi!
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    With your knowledge, you shouldn't have to do any bitter ranting.
    The knowledge part is easy; applying that knowledge is the real hard part. Maybe that's where wisdom comes in....I guess I need a few more years. :-/
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    Most of the women I know prefer nice and stable to "bad." Maybe it's just my age, and the women that I know are more mature.
    Well!? Are they single, and can you introduce me?
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re: Fair is fair

    I'm not saying it's always true, but I think the "Bad Boy Syndrome" does seem to apply particularly to hot women.

    I can remember jokingly taking my ex-ATFS face and giving it a shake, when she announced her latest boyfriend's name, and saying "WHY!" and she just smiled and said nothing and went on to a relationship where she did nothing but complain about him. Alas, he had the "bad boy" gene. I, of course, continued to take care of her as always.... and he didn't.

    Now, I have another female friend, also hot, who just directly said "I like assholes!". Well, at least she's honest.

    >>>Sad<<<


    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Any Women Prefer "Nice Guys" ?

    oh and bad boys never did it for me. Stable and secure, thoughtful with a good dash of romance and humor is the perfect man in my book.
    I hear sort of thing from a lot of women. Most often when listening to them tell me what a selfish moronic asshole that their on/off again boyfriend is.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Veteran Member Brooklyn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    ok guys heres what i think ladies love a challenge and sometimes a bad boy is a challenge sexual and in a relationship...but i think when its all said and done women will not want a bad boy to settle with cause they are hard to commit with ...so i would say its just a phase that girls go through

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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    ok guys heres what i think ladies love a challenge and sometimes a bad boy is a challenge sexual and in a relationship...but i think when its all said and done women will not want a bad boy to seattle with cause they are hard to commit with ...so i would say its just a phase that girls go through
    So, Brooklyn has a bad boy in Seattle, just kidding. Read your post. I know it was a mis-spell.

    On a more serious note though, your post really indicates that the reason you won't be with a "bad boy" is that they are hard to settle with, not that the "bad boy" part is bad. Until that part is deemed worng the syndrome is still alive and kicking.

    Possible definitions of a "bad boy":

    1) A guy who gets you to do things you normally would not do, which includes, things sexually, illegal or other

    2) A guy whom you love, but cheats on you and you still want him anyway

    3) A guy who goes to jail one or more times

    4) A guy who will go to jail due to his activities sooner or later.

    What is exciting about that? We all not where those things end.

    >>>Sad<<<

    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    Women go for the bad boys when they are young and don't know any better. When they get tired of that crap, they move on to a better thing. My sister and I both have wonderful boyfriends who are kind, funny, smart and romantic, who do interesting and productive work. We joke that we wound up with them because we spent years finding out exactly what we didn't want in a man.

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    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    One thing you have to remember on the flip side is that dancers definitely qualify as the "bad girl" type, so we may need a thread to address our own desire for the "bad girl". Although maybe the whole site is dedicated to that...lol

    >>>Sad<<<
    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    Veteran Member Rayleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    I agree there are alot of chicks out there into the bad boy thing, I just think its dumb personally to be attracted to men who treat women badly.
    I am much more attracted to men who are caring enough to plan for a real future for example rather than buy that Viper . Sure a Viper is nice but love it aint"

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    Veteran Member coolshot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    well i'm no psycologist but isnt it true that girls abused early on
    in life tend to seek out abusive relationships later on in life?(HOWEVER, not all girls seeking bad boys are abused) At least thats what i hear on loveline every now and again from Dr. Drew.

    Well i watching Mtv and caught something with Christina Aguilera on how she described that she would love a bad boy rocker with edge over a cute n nice backstreet boy anyday. Hmm
    could that be influenced by the fact that her father used to beat her and her mom?
    whats a PL to do?

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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    My #2 son (30 yr old) is the proverbial "bad boy"...tall, good looking with a smart ass attitude but a smooth talker with the ladies. He has major commitment issues which has resulted in two divorces. Recently he broke up with a girl who I thought was awesome. She wanted to have a serious real life relationship but I guess he wanted no part of that. Broke my and Mrs FBR's heart but all we can do is counsel we cant orchestrate his life.

    Hes been to the club with me a number of times and knows several of the flockettes. They ask about him all the time LOL I haven't taken him recently...he always wants me to pay for his LD's LOL He works for me and I pay him big bucks...he can buy his own LOL But I do cover his bar tab though...Im not a bad dad LOL Miss L has always wanted to go out with him but he doesn't date strippers. Theres a story behind that I wont go into. Miss L has a couple of kids and would like a committed relationship...I don't think my boy is a good candidate for her.

    Yesterday, he told me he just started dating this new chick. Shes around 30, drives a Mercedes and owns a string of tanning salons. Im like...cool Sounds like maybe she has her shit together. It will be interesting to see what develops.

    FBR



    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    I am no psychologist. I'm just a bartender.

    Why do women go for the "bad boy?" The same reason why guys go for "the stripper". They are attracted to the Image.

    The image is the surface perception both society has of the "bad boy" and the image he consciously or unconsciously portrays. It is an image of excitement, adventure, rule breaking, freedom, self assuredness, and a 'buck them system" attitude that we, as independence and freedom loving Americans, look very favorably on.

    However, the realty of most "bad boys" is that, on the whole, to be a "system bucker" and a "rule breaker", you have to have a great sense of self absorption. Why would one pick a Viper over a Saturn? Because the Viper is a cool car and makes YOU look cool. Its not about the practicality of having a vehicle, it’s about you and what you show the world. It’s all about you.

    Bad boys buck societal rules. What many women don’t understand or don’t see is that they buck everyone else’s rules too. Some women want the Bad Boy to go break society rules, but not their rules. It doesn’t happen that way. A bad boy will be such to society and in private life. Expecting that dichotomy of character only brings heartache and pain, because it is rarely reality.

    Some women go for the surface image, which has great appeal and great compulsion. When that surface image chips away and the underlying realty that this guy pretty much only thinks for himself (which is often a necessary component of the bad boy mentality), they are left with the choice to get out or stay with someone who is very bad for them. They cling to the original bad boy impression, hoping that that’s all they will eventually get; despite the facts that prove it’s a facade.

    Most human beings, male and female, fall for an image of a person. When that image proves to be far from reality, they futilely try to get the person back to that image, or blind themselves to see that that image is only on the surface. That’s why, in my opinion, people stay with those that hurt them far longer than common sense would tell us they would. An abused girlfriend will go back to the guy with the Viper because “he may be a jerk, but he has a Viper, which impresses everyone”. An abused boyfriend will go back to the girlfriend who cheats on him left and right because “She is hot, and my being with her impresses others”.

    I think that’s just how many humans will be, and there is no cure.

    Just a bartender’s perspective.

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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    I notice that at the club where I go dancers fall mostly for either the "rapper" types or old guys sitting at the bar, buying drinks. The first group certainly qualify as "bad boy" but the second group is where most of the cash is lol.



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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    I was more curious about why it's so difficult for women to admit that attraction to the "bad boy." Men will go after the "pretty girl" and make no secret about it.
    It's especially puzzling when it comes to seeking advice from women about women. They will tell you to be the "nice guy" knowing full well that you'll fail. It's just mean. Now maybe not every guy could change and be more like the "bad boy," but some might if they weren't getting conflicting advice all the time.
    Quote Originally Posted by _Avery_ View Post
    omg, why is it so huge?!! lol lol

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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    It's especially puzzling when it comes to seeking advice from women about women. They will tell you to be the "nice guy" knowing full well that you'll fail.
    LOL, one dancer I know openly tells me I'm too nice, that girls like the bad boys not the nice guys, everytime she see's me she asks me if I've been working on being an asshole.


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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    RH Im sure if you work at it you have good asshole potential LOL

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Featured Member Chuck149's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    RH Im sure if you work at it you have good asshole potential LOL

    FBR
    LMAO According some ladies on SW, we all have that potential
    "when it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day" ~ Marty Bucella

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    Default Re: Do Most Women Prefer "Bad Boys" ?

    i have to agree with collette here. i did the bad boy thing or in my case the bad girl thing as well.... anyway when you realize your self worth you go for the good, stable guy and surprise surprise it's just as exciting!
    As quoted by Luckyone:
    I asked directions from a genie in a bottle of jim beam and she lied to me.

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