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Thread: Best sex...

  1. #1
    Featured Member MeganS's Avatar
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    Default Best sex...

    O.K., I wanna hear the "best, craziest, most f***ed up, mortifying, sex stories you have to offer! Let's spice up the forums!

    Any ways, the only one I have to offer right now is a sexy, yummy, female threesome I had with two other girlfriends on Halloween a few years back. (Hmmm, no wonder I'm feeling nostolgic this time of the year)


    We got back to my friends house (having left everyone else earlier) and decided to kick back drinking some wine. Which is pretty much what I'm doing right now! (forgive any drunken slurs!) So it happens to be that my one friend, "C", whom I've gotten to know every crack and crevice on before, starts licking on my friend, "S", who I don't think has seen a naked women before besides herself!

    So to cut past the kissing licking mumbo jumbo, they fall over on top of me (who's rather irritated at first, since I'm trying to enjoy my wine) and drag me off into the bedroom.

    To be continued inb a bit, I need to refill on the wine and oh what the hell, leave you hanging for a bit!
    "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you."
    Francoise Sagan

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    LMAO I love a woman who gets all drunked up and starts telling us her intimate secrets Go Megan Go! LOL

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Senior Member X's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    this one time in band camp...
    "So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life."

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...


    I need to tell the story of my one and only threesome. Me and two hot chicks LOL Im working on it

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  5. #5
    Featured Member sadbuttrue's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    My ex-wife was an extremely jealous woman. It got to the point where I couldn't even so much as look at another woman without comment. Or for that matter say something nice about a woman without her thinking I was having sex with her.

    My house in the quiet "cul de sac" I used to live in had a picture window like most of the houses in the neighborhood. Usually the houses were staggered so you weren't looking in on the other person's house across the street.

    A new house was built on the corner across from ours and you could see in the picture window of the other house. A moderately cute woman and her husband moved in across the street.

    My TV was in front of the picture window, so although you'd be watching TV, you could also see into the other house and whatever they were doing if the curtains weren't drawn. So I could see the lady sometimes, while watching TV. This didn't go unnoticed.

    One morning, I was getting ready for work and we were going through the almost daily event of fighting about whom I would be with at work, which branched to me looking at the lady across the street while watching TV.

    She was begging me to not go to work. But I told her I had to. She decided she was going to illustrate to me why I did not want to go or at least, as she thought, keep me from thinking about anyone but her while I was at work.

    So, in the picture window in the quiet little neighborhood, my ex decided to un-zip my work pants and give me the "mother of all blow jobs". A relentless one where she left absolutely nothing unsucked. I actually tried to get away because it was in front of the window. But she didn't let me go. She actually hoped the lady across the street would see it. I was too involved to notice.

    >>>Sad<<<

    Blonde jokes are two lines long so that men can understand them.

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    Default Re: Best sex...

    A cute young dancer once confessed her secret fantasies to me. No one had a clue, least of all her BF. We met one afternoon on her day off.... Among other things, I tied her wrists to her ankles with round white sneaker shoelaces. Then we went through her list of fantasies: hot wax, money shot and other fun stuff. When it was over, she wanted to know when we could do it again, and could she please keep the white laces.... The next time I saw her, she said, "See, I have the laces in my running shoes. They give me a lot of confidence." That's the part that makes it all worthwhile.

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    Featured Member MeganS's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    So any ways, we all head into the bedroom and sit upon the bed. I'm still clutching my oh so coveted bottle of wine while the two "lovebirds" go at it on the bed right next to me. My glass of wine all of a sudden gets grabbed and thrown back, while I'm getting grabbed, stripped, and molested by my fellow girlfriends (who by the way I've never seen hornier)

    Ah, but see, I become the designated pussy licker, slash woman pleaser, as I go about licking, sucking, groping, and molesting these women! My only gripe is though, I pleased them and I didn't get that in return.

    Now, if you want more details, PM me, and I'll get back to you!!

    MMMM...
    Smoochies!
    love, Megan
    "A dress makes no sense unless it inspires men to want to take it off you."
    Francoise Sagan

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    Veteran Member merely_lurking's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Ah, but see, I become the designated pussy licker, slash woman pleaser, as I go about licking, sucking, groping, and molesting these women!
    Someone's gotta be the designated pussy licker.
    A fat chick is like a big, warm, comfortable pillow that you can also have sex with....

  9. #9
    Featured Member Chuck149's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Friends don't let friends lick pussy drunk
    "when it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day" ~ Marty Bucella

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    Featured Member electric_head's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    LOL Chuck they get drunk and lick with them.
    Don't make me spank you!

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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Someone's gotta be the designated pussy licker.
    you can alway go in a ring. :o


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    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Well.. there WAS this Nun, see......

    <story missing>


    .... and after that she said "Holy God.. That will NEVER come out!".

    Hope you guys enjoyed it.

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    Veteran Member Rayleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    While on a working vacation in S. FL I joined these two customers after my shift at a swingers club. I got pretty toasted and ended up letting the two guys do me on video. ThankGod I was with it enough to get the tape ! :o I'd never admit this in person as its a bit trashy, I know, but it was pretty hot

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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Well.. there WAS this Nun, see......

    <story missing>


    .... and after that she said "Holy God.. That will NEVER come out!".

    Hope you guys enjoyed it.
    LOL PJ, I can't believe you did that.

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    Default Re: Best sex...

    While on a working vacation in S. FL I joined these two customers after my shift at a swingers club. I got pretty toasted and ended up letting the two guys do me on video. ThankGod I was with it enough to get the tape ! :o I'd never admit this in person as its a bit trashy, I know, but it was pretty hot
    Where do I meet women like you ???

  16. #16
    Veteran Member merely_lurking's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    While on a working vacation in S. FL I joined these two customers after my shift at a swingers club. I got pretty toasted and ended up letting the two guys do me on video. ThankGod I was with it enough to get the tape ! :o I'd never admit this in person as its a bit trashy, I know, but it was pretty hot
    I wouldn't say it was trashy, but definitely is a bit risky to have sex with somebody on video that you don't know all that well. These things have the habit of popping up on internet porn sites.
    A fat chick is like a big, warm, comfortable pillow that you can also have sex with....

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    Senior Member Spanky's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Megan - Thanks for starting such a great thread.

    OK, so back in college I met this girl at a frat party and we go into a bathroom to get busy. I'm sitting on the toilet with the top lid down while she was straddling me on my lap LD style. We are going at it for a while and when she gets close, she starts bucking on me - up and down real hard. With one down stroke the toilet seat cracks and gets a piece of my ass cheek pinched/ trapped in the seat crack - :o yes it hurt like hell, so I'm bucking to get her off (double entandra) and free my cheek from the seat. She doesn't know I'm pinched and thinks I'm just really getting into the action and she gets even more excited. Long story short, I finally got loose on a stroke and polished her off in style.


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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Five serious responses, 11 smartass comments. No wonder Megan chickened out.

  19. #19
    Veteran Member merely_lurking's Avatar
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    Five serious responses, 11 smartass comments. No wonder Megan chickened out.
    I'm not sure if she chickened out, I think she mentioned that she is out of town 5 days a week and doesn't get to check out the web that much. We'll see.
    A fat chick is like a big, warm, comfortable pillow that you can also have sex with....

  20. #20
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    Default Re: Best sex...

    You are right ML! Megan did say she is out of town 5 days and has limited access. I'm sure she'll be back.
    When the man says, "I do," it is the happiest day of her life.-Al Bundy

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    Default Re: Best sex...

    My bad. I forgot about that.

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