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Thread: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

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    Default She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    After a guy talks to me for a while at work, he will sometimes add..."Why are you doing this? You're intelligent, you could do more with your life."
    I take this as a compliment more often than not depending on how it is said. Usually, the guy just doesn't know how to say it right...LOL
    Anyways...
    There is a preconcieved notion that stripping is a "dirty" job and only girls that are 'messed up' become strippers. I can say that because, well, number 1, I'm a dancer, and number 2, I've thought that before.
    Even now, if I tell someone I'm a stripper, I get raised eyebrows as a response (not sure if they're suprised or just trying to picture me with my clothes off lol) ...
    Why is it that the first thing most people think of when you say stripper is some drugged up alcoholic that is on the verge of being evicted because she can't come up with her rent?
    Why do people think that strippers almost always have psychological disorders?
    I have my own theory, but let's hear yours first!
    Luv,
    Amber

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    First of all, I have had first hand experience with psychotic dancers...I once had a roommate who was one of them....

    In terms of drugs...well I don't know...no real first hand experience with that one but I've heard about its existence. Can't really comment on it.

    I give most dancers the benefit of the doubt...a lot of them just make an honest living and are just like anyone else (aside from that teeny fact that they get naked and rub all over strangers...). Seriously, though...most people who stereotype dancers are the same ignorant morons who stereotype other groups of people...I pay them no mind. They're probably the same guys who would stereotype SC customers as pervs (hmmm wait a sec...maybe that one is true...???)

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    Featured Member sander8son's Avatar
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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    well, i think the stereotype is true...about a large percentage... however, that doesn't mean all dancers are drug addicts. id say drug use/abuse is more prevalent in dancing than in say accounting. but that doesn't mean every dancer is a junky. i think it stems from the fact that we in this country are ignorant assholes. we dont realize that sex is actualy what created us, for some strange reason(and mike can back this up with section 12 articles VII and VIII of the deleware house Law) sex/sexuality is illegal or constantly being challenged as such. more young people today are changing their views on sex, and with this hopefully we'll expell the rules of old once we gain power and all this will change. right now, we've changed those rules in our heads. thats why you see many "good girls" (non drug users) like amber dancing alongside the druggies. lol.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Yep Amber, a good percentage are messed up. Not all, but a very good percentage. Once you get to know a stripper long enough, eventually she opens up and you hear about past or current drug use, a bad family life when she was younger, very low self esteem etc. When you hear those stories as much as we do, eventually you stereotype all dancers that way. That is unfortunate, but that is the way life is.

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Well, we live in a society that hammers home the message that women are not sex objects, it's wrong to treat them that way, and blah blah blah all the other crap mainstream feminists are seving up. So it follows that it would be wrong to work as a 'sex object.'

    Before I started reading these forums, I thought that dancers hated their jobs and hated the customers (and thus must be working there out of a severe need for money). I think that's part of the thinking that leads to those sorts of 'raised eyebrows' and questions from customers. My current thinking is more like they hate certain aspects of the job (i.e. grabby customers, accidents, etc.) and like other parts of the job. As for their views on customers, little by little I've read bits of information on the pink site that suggest while they don't hate most customers, the vast majority do not respect them. Read carefully there, and you'll notice some interesting patterns...

    I remember one dancer commenting over there that she wouldn't want to date a guy that was okay with her job, that he shouldn't be okay with it.

    I suspect that almost all of us have some problem with it, if only a little. I know I feel kind of guilty about going sometimes.

    -lestat1
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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I don't know why. I have this conversation every once in awhile with buddies. I usually don't say a damn thing about it. My ATF is a prime example. Last person on Earth I would see as a stripper. I've haven't had the balls to ask her why. I'll have to ask sometime. I thought about it. She's slowly getting away from it. It doesn't matter to me.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    It's so easy to stereotype groups of people, but that's what's done I'm afraid. I believe what Sandy said in that perhaps a few more than is the normal %age have some troubles, but there are lots of good, smart, fun girls who strip too. Most girls have a hesitancy in getting naked in front of strangers and then climbing on their laps, and the hesitancy comes from what lots of Moms, Dads and society tell women they should do- "pull your dress down or a man will look right up it". It's against the law to go topless on most beaches. There are lots of film stars who won't do topless roles, too. So because dancers fly in the face of what is widely regarded as proper behavior, there must be something wrong with girls who do it, people conclude. But I also think this attitude is changing, particularly among young women. I truely believe most young women today would be understanding if a friend of theirs became a dancer, and most might even have a latent, visceral interest in it themselves. They wouldn't think there was "something wrong" with the girl for dancing because they know the girl as a friend, and that outweighs what she chooses to do to make money. Most of the dancers I know well have friends and family who know they dance, and all accept it, albeit with a little reluctance, but they accept it and think no less of the girl. Those who don't know the girls as well revert to stereotypes to define them. Getting to know people better nearly always breaks stereotypes. Now what's your answer Amber?

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I don't know where you guys hang out but I've only met a very small minority of messed up women dancing and I've been going to clubs for over 20 years. Truthfuly, I meet more wacko women in the real world on a daily basis than I do in clubs.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
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    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
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    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    i didnt say more drug addicts(if i did i didnt mean it that way) are dances, im just saying i think a higher percentage use various drugs on a semi-regular basis AND/OR are addicted vs other proffessions. just because someone uses an illegal substance doesn't make them a psycho or an addict. thats what i was saying.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Yep Amber, a good percentage are messed up. Not all, but a very good percentage. Once you get to know a stripper long enough, eventually she opens up and you hear about past or current drug use, a bad family life when she was younger, very low self esteem etc. When you hear those stories as much as we do, eventually you stereotype all dancers that way. That is unfortunate, but that is the way life is.
    I'm with money on this one. Of course there are strippers who are actually very down to earth, intelligent, normal people outside the club, others are actually from middle to upper class families but most of the others aren't. Many are single mothers or have insignificant SO's. Others where raised in dysfunctional families (like some of the girls of the pink site) and then there are the addicts and nymphs, those who give strippers a bad image. It's certainly not 100%.



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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I don't know where you guys hang out but I've only met a very small minority of messed up women dancing and I've been going to clubs for over 20 years. Truthfuly, I meet more wacko women in the real world on a daily basis than I do in clubs.
    Yoda, I have been around about as long as you. And no disrespect to you, but I think the question is, where have YOU been all these years! Most dancers no matter where you are, have had a very troubled life somewhere along the way. I am not saying drugs, but broken homes etc. Just about all of them (remember, I said just about all, not all) have major self esteem problems. These are the facts. That is why most of them get their boobs done. Not just to make money, but because it makes them feel better about themselves. Anyone that has to have their body altered in any way shape or form to improve their self esteem, has something wrong upstairs. Yoda, I am glad that you have met such wonderful women dancing. But I am sure if you really got to know them, and I mean REALLY got to know them, you might see things differently.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I know what you by customers commenting about why am I doing this instead of something else? For me, it was something to do whilst I decided what I wanted to do next. Now.. it is something to do so I can have some investments etc before I'm 30 as well as the $$ so I can get the training I need to get into a career I will enjoy after dancing.

    Another reason I do is .. it allows me to express a part of myself I would otherwise not have the opportunity to express: the nudist, the dancer/performer, the sex goddess, etc. I'm a flirt by nature and also if you saw my Astrological Natal Chart.. you would see that I was so much suited to this job more than any Hospitality job I was previously doing.

    As for other people.. if they think down on me for doing this job or about strippers in general (etc)... I don't want to know them. It is like people who say they hate cats.. I also don't want to know them as I love animals and esp. cats.

    As for the drugs... I'm lucky that at my club the greater majority of dancers don't do them or else do them outside of work. They mainly drink, I guess. As for other clubs... you would have to be blind not to see the drug use amongst the dancers.



    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    A stripper?

    Naw... If you were to tell me you were a politician or a lawyer, then I'd maybe ask what was wrong with you! :-)

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I'm not going to venture to guess what percentage of the ladies who dance in strip clubs are "fucked up" other than to say its more than just a few desperate lost souls, and that its nowhere near all of them. Then again, I suppose it depends on what one's definition of "fucked up" is.

    Although may I point out that most "fucked up" dancers were fucked up long before they were dancers, and that if we were to put the non-dancer women around us underneath the same moral scrutiny, we'd find out there are probably almost as many fucked up people there.

    That's probably why in fact so many people put dancers down, because seeing a dancer exhibit the worst stereotype behavior is too reflective of their own inadequacies.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    i hate cats, i hate dogs. I LOVE DANCERS. would never think less of someone for dancing...hell, i have admiration for lots of dacners. I think what they do is tough and all the money they make is well deserved.

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    Featured Member sander8son's Avatar
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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    the negative connotation thing is why i always use the word "dancer" instead of "stripper"... stripper has always had a negative connotation. whereas dancer is just someone dancing, unless you're islamic, nobody ever thinks ill of that.

    join my quest. i do refer to the clubs as strip clubs though. but the performers are dancers...they just happen to dance with less clothes on then MOST people(ive certainly seen people dancing in non-SCs with little clothing on).

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Our highly material culture produces a number of very pretty, cock-obsessed exhibitionists who cannot defer gratification. That's "wrong" according to dominant cultural norms, but it's perfect for the SC subculture.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Amber, the outlook would change, but only within limits. The cultural norm is that married guys do NOT get dry humped by other women. You can go running or play tennis with another woman, but you can't hump with them. A strip club may provide a safe "sink" for this sexual energy, but dancers will always bear a social stigma. It's the stigma that limits the number of workers and raises the earnings for those willing to participate.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    There is a connection because the stigma creates social isolation, and isolated people start to feel alone. Then they turn to the SC subculture and its drugs to fill a void.... A college student with a "legitimate" identity can avoid the slide, but I see other young dancers sliding within months.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    My theory is simmple...
    People are stupid.
    That's the greater part of it.

    I think a lot of times strippers actually bring this upon themselves. I look at the end of the night and see the amount of dancers that are stumbling around the dressing room because they are completely innebriated.
    And that's the rest.



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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    When guys ask me why I dance, or say your too good for this job, my reply is simple: If you were me wouldn't you want to be a stripper?

    Most guys who enjoy strip clubs agree that yes they wish they could be strippers if they were good looking young women.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    Paris, I totally agree. Why not take advantage of your God given talents? For exampe, my son is a computer whiz and he has a great job as my company's IT manager. I have many sales people on staff who make a very good living because they are "people persons" and instinctively know how to take care of customers and thus make damn good money doing it. All makes sense to me.
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    I don't know where you guys hang out but I've only met a very small minority of messed up women dancing and I've been going to clubs for over 20 years. Truthfuly, I meet more wacko women in the real world on a daily basis than I do in clubs.
    LOL right on! It's true that alot of dancers are messed up, but alot of those got messed up after entering the biz. It's too easy to get into drugs and heavy drinking in this environment. I also see alot of really screwed up women who would never 'lower' themselves to strip, but they abuse drugs (maybe infrequently), sleep around with anyone and everyone, leave their kids at home to go party every night after work (all the while condemning strippers for leaving their kids home to go to work), neglecting their kids by leaving them with anyone who will take them for days on end or just not having much to do with them at all, etc etc etc.

    I also agree with the poster who said that most people believe the notions that we've all been forcefed about what 'proper' women do, so a girl who would take her clothes off for money MUST be messed up. Funny though, how most of those people didn't think too poorly of Halle Berry for agreeing to show her tits for $800k - the attitude I heard most there was 'you go girl, make em pay up!'

    Anyway, I quit caring a long time ago what most people think of me - they either like / accept me or don't. I'm happy to have the ones who do, and the rest are irrelevant in my life.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    [quote]

    LOL right on! It's true that alot of dancers are messed up, but alot of those got messed up after entering the biz. It's too easy to get into drugs and heavy drinking in this environment.


    LMFAO!! I guess Yoda only gets to know strippers when they are starting out!

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    Default Re: She's a stripper? Why? What's wrong with her?

    true, alot of people think strippers are dirty, slutty drug addicts. but most of the people who think that have never actually set foot in a strip club and dont know what goes on.

    i have not told many people in my life that i am a dancer, b/c i know i would be looked down upon etc. i probably should- this would help weed out the people that really arent my friends.
    i'm a dancer...so what? i'm doing my thing just like everyone else. when a guy asks me why i am a stripper, i could be doing something else, i say something like: "it's not like i'm something really disgraceful, like a lawyer"...haha.

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