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Thread: Would you step in?

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    Default Would you step in?

    Scenario...
    You are at a club and you see a private dance going on. The guy is getting carried away and the girl has repeatedly made gestures that seems as though she keeps asking him to stop his behavior. H e does not quit acting in a manner that is innapropriate behavior, but she does not stop the dance. The bouncer is not paying attention, but she does not call out for help.
    Would you step in at all? How would you handle a situation like this? Do you consider it any of your business?
    Luv,
    Amber

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Amber, I learned a long time ago: YOU MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS in a strip club. You do not get involved, cuz I dont know if you have noticed, there are a lot of crazy people that go to these places! Sorry, but I would not want to get hurt or killed in a strip club to help a dancer.

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    God/dess lestat1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    In that scenario she's tolerating the a**hole and his behavior, and it's not my place to tell her what to do. If I stepped in, she might be appreciative, or she might slap me for butting in and ruining the dance (and her money). Now if she were actually trying to stop the dance and/or get away, or calling for help, then I would go tell the bouncer.
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    Featured Member sander8son's Avatar
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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    i agree with lestat. i wouldnt' do anything unless she asked for help, then id get the bouncer and i wouldn't mind beatin the shit out of the guy too after notifying the bouncer. but i wouldnt just step in...hell, maybe they agreed upon the dance earlier that hed get to do certain extras, but shed pretend not to want them or something. but if she was trying to get help, id certainly help out...but not until then.

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    Member viplover's Avatar
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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Interesting topic. I would go to the bouncer and tell him about the situation. I for one know there are tons of crazy people in strip clubs and who knows if i try to step in that I wont get shot at or stabbed. So I would let the bouncer take care of it and let him do his job.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Here is a little story for all hard guys that want to get involved personally in a strip club (getting a bouncer is the best option). Back in the late 80's in a club in NJ, a dancer and some guy were having some kind of fight. Another customer didnt like it that this guy was fighting with her (for whatever reason, I dont remember, but it is insignificant). So the 2 guys had words and took it outside. Well the guy that was fighting with the dancer stabbed the other guy to death. Merely Lurking and all the other guys out there, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE DEALING WITH! You can be dealing with a guy that looks like a bum, but is a martial arts expert, or some guy with guns or a knife or is just nuts! Go ahead, get the bouncer if you must, but stay the hell out of it personally!

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    If it was questionable if shewas in trouble and she could respond-I'd verbaly ask her if she was ok.
    If she said no, I'd step in until a bouncer arrived and after if he said he needed help. In merely's situation above I'd not hesitate to forcefully remove the customer holding down a dancer.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?




    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    on Today at 11:05am, merely_lurking wrote: Okay, I understand why you guys would not want to get directly involved, and I completely agree. However, there does not seem to be a lot of bouncers or security people at the clubs I usually go to. There are cameras, but I don't know how closely these are monitored and it seems like the managers double as security often.
    Let me give you a hypothetical situation. Suppose you are sitting not too far away from the dancer and customer in a secluded area of the club and there is nobody else nearby. Suppose the man is physically restraining the dancer, covering her mouth, while he is performing intercourse on her and she is clearly struggling. You could go look for a bouncer or manager, but this could take a minute or two. Would you want this to go on for that much longer when you could have an impact on the situation. Suppose she was an ATF of yours or that you had some personal connection with her, would any of this make a difference? It would for me.




    Ok not many clubs are that secluded even on a dead night! We arent talking the middle of the woods! Secondly, even if it was an ATF of mine, it would not make a difference, at least to me. Remember, I am not speaking about other people, but myself. In all honesty, I am gonna possibly take some flack for this, but even though it is an ATF, she is still just a dancer! Remember, they do not care about you in the real world. She may be an ATF for you, but to her you are nothing except money! If she disappeared you would most likely never hear from her again. Once again, not worth getting killed over. Chuck has often stated this before, you can always get another ATF! Now dont get me wrong, I do not want to see any dancer or any person in general get raped or beat up. But you have to take a step back and say, "I have a good life, and I do not want it to end in a strip club over a dancer that I really do not know".








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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Even so... if it were an ATF, or even a dancer I knew personally, I think I would have to get involved. I couldn't sit by and watch.
    When the man says, "I do," it is the happiest day of her life.-Al Bundy

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    If he was doing things with the dancer that weren't allowed at the club, and if it was clear the dancer was doing all she could to prevent him from abusing her, I would definitely let the management or another bouncer know about the guy and the girl's struggles. If her dance finished befor they got to her, they would at least be keeping an eye on the guy during whatever following dances he got. And they would talk to the girl to make sure she was OK. In my clubs they would anyway.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    I know for a fact that each of the clubs I go to in NJ/NY have cameras in the lap dance room AND the VIP room. There isnt a single chair/booth that isnt monitored. Some girls get "fined" if they let a guy go too far and if its WAY too far and the girl definitely appears to be struggling you can count on the bouncers intervening ASAP. They are all over that guy like white on rice!

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    Featured Member Chuck149's Avatar
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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Scenario...
    You are at a club and you see a private dance going on. The guy is getting carried away and the girl has repeatedly made gestures that seems as though she keeps asking him to stop his behavior. H e does not quit acting in a manner that is innapropriate behavior, but she does not stop the dance. The bouncer is not paying attention, but she does not call out for help.
    Would you step in at all? How would you handle a situation like this? Do you consider it any of your business?
    Luv,
    Amber
    In this scenario, no I wouldn't interfere.

    Now other posters have expanded on this post to include being held against her will, clearly trying to get away or bring raped.

    In these situations, my LE background and training would kick in and I would step in. But hey, that's just Me!

    "when it comes to staying young, a mind-lift beats a face-lift any day" ~ Marty Bucella

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    I know this is off topic, but here we have an interesting topic, where we all dont agree, and nobody has threatened to run away! It is nice to see that we can disagree yet still get along. Hmmm, what am I trying to say here ?? LOL

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    We are all responsible for our actions. In Ambers scenario, the dancer is still in control. It is HER choice to continue or to stop the dance, therefore it is none of my business. In the expanded situations, I have to look myself in the mirror every morning. If she was clearly being raped, held against her will, or her life was possibly in danger, I would be there helping her out and kicking his ass in a heart beat and damned the consequences. I would not be able to look my self in the mirror if I didn't and I sure would not be able live with myself if she was seriously physically harmed or killed and I did nothing to intervene.
    Everything I like is either illegal, immoral , or fattening!

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    If she's not calling out for help I wouldn't step in. I made this mistake once and the dancer actualy got pissed at me because the guy got up and left without paying her...
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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    Difficult to say now not being in front of the real situation... however, I think that unless the situation is really dangerous for the girl (requires immediate action), the first thing I would do is to let the bouncers know of the situation.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    This is a real good question, but I think money is right on this one, you look for help, but you don't get involved, you don't know what kind of nut case this could be, he could have a gun, he could have a knife, he could decide to wait for you in the parking lot, just not worth it in my opinion.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    That's what bouncers are for.

    I've seen several instances where bouncers have had to physically remove customers. It's not pretty, and I don't want to be part of it. But at every club I've been to the bouncers are very quick with dealing with these problems, so I'd best just call them over.

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    Default Re: Would you step in?

    If it's a small club, no bouncer, lots of regulars and I know the dancer, I would intervene and have. Larger club with a bouncer, I'd tell the bouncer.

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