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Thread: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

  1. #1
    242_fair
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    Default Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I just wondered if anyone else has ever had the same problem....

    Lately, when I come home late at night, and I go upstairs in my apartment, I have this (irrational?) fear that a particular one of my regular customers is in my apartment waiting for me (to kill/mame/rape me).

    The feeling was so strong that it actually took me a couple minutes to get the nerve to go upstairs one day last week. Worried for myself, I talked to a lady I know who is a psychologist. She asked me if I ever had dreams of the man, and then I suddenly remembered a nightmare I had of him.

    The guy is about 50, kinda creepy (you know, the looser type who smells a bit and wears all black), but he's my best customer ever and spends minimum $800 a month with me.

    Anyone else ever get scared that all this teasing could be leading to a very dangerous confrontation?

    PS. I don't lead my customers on. I never insinuate that we might meet outside the club one day, and I never act like eventually I'll 'come around' and give them a chance outside the club.

  2. #2
    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I don't lead guys on either, but it doesn't stop them from trying or hoping to the point of disallusion. Maybe you sense that he's not getting it and it scares you because you feel powerless against him.

    Ask youself if you want to keep him as a customer. If you do, just be very careful with any information you give him because we all know there are people that don't take "no" for an answer no matter how hard to you try express it.

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Get some pepper spray.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Just my opinion...

    Thats your gut telling you something is wrong.
    I think you should listen.
    Already,from what it sounds,this isnt worth 800 a month.(it aint worth 8000 either)

    My free advice is ...
    Start to break off from this customer.Do it as fast as you can without him freaking out on you.

  5. #5
    Veteran Member goldclubbing's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    In my opinion the nature of your business is leading men on and creating false hope. If you have a guy giving you $800 a month then he is doing it for a reason...not because he just feels generous. Maybe he's just lonely and your nice to him, why shouldn't he want to see you outside the club? When you start accepting this kind of money you need to deal with the consequences. Think of it from his point of view. I think your feelings of fear is really guilt because you know this is true. I'm sure you have met guys in everyday life who would go bonkers by the teasing stripper shit that you guys do. As I've said a strip club is like junior high and older guys have forgotten how lame the experience really was. I myself have given plenty of money and attention to one girl in particular but only did so because I liked the attention she gave me in the club...although we did meet outside sometimes for lunch and such...I never forgot that the relationship was about money...but in this case she was upfront and told me from the beginning..."hey, I like you and its fun to hang out with you but we are never going to fuck". It became easier to be friends from that point on because she was upfront and not misleading...our relationship was defined. And yes, I still tipped her and bought her drinks and such but as a friend. But then again we like one anothers company you seem to not like this guy and are kind of creeped out by him? If your gut says danger...listen!

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Quote Originally Posted by goldclubbing
    ....When you start accepting this kind of money you need to deal with the consequences. Think of it from his point of view. I think your feelings of fear is really guilt because you know this is true.....
    THIS IS OUR JOB! We sell a fantasy. We shouldn't be held accountable for your misconceptions.

  7. #7
    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Quote Originally Posted by goldclubbing
    In my opinion the nature of your business is leading men on and creating false hope.
    Im afraid you have the wrong idea IMO of "strip"clubs.We dont sell false hope,we sell a fantasy.If you want gurantees,your going to have to go to a brothel.


    If you have a guy giving you $800 a month then he is doing it for a reason...not because he just feels generous. Maybe he's just lonely and your nice to him, why shouldn't he want to see you outside the club?
    Yes there is a reason,he pays for her time and attention and for a show.
    Seeing someone outside of the fantasy isnt on the menu at MOST gentlemens clubs.Even at Brothels you dont get to see the girls outside of work.
    Its just not on the menu.

    When you start accepting this kind of money you need to deal with the consequences.
    This kind of money????Chump Change!!!
    sorry,its my opinion that your wrong and way off base.This is a simple business deal,thats all,no more no less.
    If i take money for any other services,should i have to fuck the person paying me???
    The state lays down its rules,the clubs adapt theirs to fit,then the entertainers provide prescribed entertainment.

    Dats it.

    Think of it from his point of view.
    I could give two shits about his point of view when it comes to this.We have a menu,if he doesnt want what we sell,2fuckinbad.
    (not aimed at you,but any customer who intends to cop an attitude because a girl wont fuck him for money)

    I think your feelings of fear is really guilt because you know this is true. I'm sure you have met guys in everyday life who would go bonkers by the teasing stripper shit that you guys do.
    are you friggin kidding me???
    wow dude,your really surprising me with this post.

    Why should someone feel guilty for doing their job???


    As I've said a strip club is like junior high and older guys have forgotten how lame the experience really was.
    Lame??

    yup,jilted customer for sure.

    I think its lame for you because your expecting something that isnt supposed to be there.

    Do you often order a big Mac at pizza hut and then get pissed when they dont serve it up to you??

    Read the friggin menu!!!

    I myself have given plenty of money and attention to one girl in particular but only did so because I liked the attention she gave me in the club...although we did meet outside sometimes for lunch and such...I never forgot that the relationship was about money...but in this case she was upfront and told me from the beginning..."hey, I like you and its fun to hang out with you but we are never going to fuck". It became easier to be friends from that point on because she was upfront and not misleading...our relationship was defined.
    Let me save you alot of heartache.
    My advice would be to stop trolling the strip clubs for dates or girlfriends.

    As someone in the industry,let me also "define"your relationship with this business...

    We sell a fantasy.
    If you want to buy that fantasy,come on in and you will enjoy yourself and wont mind the money you spend.

    If you come in for any other reason,your asking to have a bad time and to leave feeling like you got cheated.


    i gotta say,this post and the last one you did today was not like your post i have seen before.Usually i have seen nothing but nice things and stuff on topic.
    This one and the one about you getting a handjob in the corner are kinda sketchy.
    Last edited by VenusGoddess; 10-12-2004 at 03:02 PM.

  8. #8
    Veteran Member shedevil4260's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I agree with Emily. Don't feel guilty for taking his money you made it fair and square. Just be really careful and carry pepper spray like onlythebest said. Don't let this guy upset you too much but at the same time be on extra alert. I hope he doesnt know where you live..Does he?
    Lips, Hips, and Sugary Tits

  9. #9
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Ok...cleaned up the thread a bit to remove personal "attacks". I do not want this thread to turn into a flaming war okie dokie? Now...if I need to come back here and pull out my you will all be made to get into a moon bounce and sing "I Love You" by Barney at the top of your lungs...on tune...in key...with the proper key signatures and timing noted. Okay? Now...

    To 242: I would strongly suggest you look at WHY you are feeling this way. This guy is obviously sending out vibes that you are picking up on...and your "instinct" is telling you to run away. Listen to that. The money is great...I love when a guy spends a lot of money on me...but, it's not worth my personal safety, sanity, and the headache that go with looking over my shoulder. Start distancing yourself and tell your bouncers about your "instinct" with this guy.

    Also, start taking different routes home. Don't be predictable. And, listen to your instincts...they will never steer you wrong.

    Goldclubbing...IMHO, your entire post is WAAAAY off base. It's like telling you that you need to sleep with your boss because he/she gave you a paycheck for the hours you worked. It's not an agreement in either business. If this girl was an escort and agreed to sleep with this guy for $800, then it would be a different story. However, she is a dancer and the agreement was x amount of dollars per dance. If he was expecting something more...it's his problem...and she has nothing to feel guilty about.

  10. #10
    Veteran Member goldclubbing's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    And BMGM no I am only discussing what I've seen and how you strippers act and no I wouldn't ever think to look for a friend in a strip club...but I've had plenty of girls ACT like they were.

    Plus aren't you a manager or DJ?If your a manager and you don't care what a customer thinks it is you who are off base and don't understand your role in the salesperson manager relationship.

    And as far as the menu comparison...plenty of strippers offer items off the menu all the time...and sometimes I get offered something by them that I didn't want...never ever happened at Pizza Hut.
    Last edited by VenusGoddess; 10-12-2004 at 03:45 PM.

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Quote Originally Posted by goldclubbing
    And yes Emily you are responsible as any salesperson who you "puff" your services.
    If by this you mean lap dances, VIP, time, etc. that is provided by me in the club, on normal terms, then I agree.

    Anything perceived by you beyond this is your own responsibility.

    Just a side note, I don't like the way you wrote that I "'puff' my services". I don't think you understand the concept of a fantasy.

  12. #12
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    PLEASE listen to me. Drop this customer NOW. Sometimes bad things happen with less build-up to an incident than what you have described. You are obviously picking up on something that your waking mind pushed aside because none of us could function in everyday life if we got scared of every strange thing we come across. But in a dancer-customer situation, these signals are very important.
    This customer has probably said or done things that put this fear into your mind. Sometimes we don't absorb the true meaning of a statement/ action until after the fact, when we put it in perspective.
    PLEASE stop talking to this guy, and tell the management about the situation, so they can make sure he doesn't do anything weird. I am speaking from experience and the experience of dancer friends. Take this seriously.

  13. #13
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Dammit! Sorry Goldclubbing...accidentally hit the "Edit" button instead of the "quote" button...

    Grrrrr....

    Many apologies...

  14. #14
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    And BMGM no I am only discussing what I've seen and how you strippers act and no I wouldn't ever think to look for a friend in a strip club...but I've had plenty of girls ACT like they were.
    First...an apology is in order. You do not know how "us strippers act". You know of how the strippers you have had these types of relationships act. This is not at all how I act. It is not how I "sell my fantasy" to people. So, before you go "grouping" us all into one category...stop and think...really.



    Plus aren't you a manager or DJ?If your a manager and you don't care what a customer thinks it is you who are off base and don't understand your role in the salesperson manager relationship.
    What a customer thinks in regards as to "how" a club should be run is of no consequence to any manager of DJ...most of these customers have no clue as to what they are talking about as they do not know the rules/regs/etc. for why the club does what they do.





    And as far as the menu comparison...plenty of strippers offer items off the menu all the time...and sometimes I get offered something by them that I didn't want...never ever happened at Pizza Hut.
    The strippers that you choose to see are breaking the law. I would suggest that you learn the rules and regs at "your" club and stick with them. I would also suggest that you watch how you "lump" people together. You do not know 99% of the dancers on this board...and yet you pretend to know how each one "operates".

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    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Quote Originally Posted by goldclubbing
    And BMGM no I am only discussing what I've seen and how you strippers act and no I wouldn't ever think to look for a friend in a strip club...but I've had plenty of girls ACT like they were. Plus aren't you a manager or DJ?If your a manager and you don't care what a customer thinks it is you who are off base and don't understand your role in the salesperson manager relationship.
    I have been the mgr at many good clubs,now im just the dj.(it pays better,less headache,and you get a better view)
    As a manager i am concerned with my customer base.The person your describing isnt what im looking for,because what i do isnt what HE is looking for.
    We sell a fantasy.If he wants more,i just cant help him,nothing i can do except explain the menu again.
    If he doesnt get the concept,whats a MGr supposed to do??
    The customer ISNT always right,Thats just on TV.
    And as far as the menu comparison...plenty of strippers offer items off the menu all the time...and sometimes I get offered something by them that I didn't want...never ever happened at Pizza Hut.
    your soooooo missing the boat.
    What they are offering is a fantasy.
    We build the appitite,you gotta eat elsewhere.

    But your right about things happening all over the country like what you describe.Just be warned,that handjob you got in the corner of the club was illegal and could have landed you and her in jail.
    Thats not an entertainer,thats a hooker or escort that got into the club and just has not been discovered yet.
    If you want to make alot of real entertainers your friend,and the mgrs and dj's,and the doorguys and waitresses,turn the girl in and get her fired.

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    Veteran Member azamber's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Quote Originally Posted by goldclubbing
    In my opinion the nature of your business is leading men on and creating false hope... I think your feelings of fear is really guilt because you know this is true.
    Yeah, I can tell from your posts you went into it thinking you'd get something out of it. Maybe you're just bitter that you had the wrong idea? ATTENTION CUSTOMERS READING THIS: WE ARE SELLING A FANTASY, and it obviously needs to be repeated. IF YOU GO INTO A SC THINKING YOU'RE GOING TO GET SOMETHING OTHER THAN A TEASE, YOU'RE FOOLING YOURSELF. Yeah, some girls meet guys out of the club and want to get together, will you be one of them? Chances are, no, especially with that attitude!

    Oh, and to stay on topic, sorry, GO WITH YOUR GUT GIRL!!!!

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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    wow I'm confuzzled....this whole thread makes no sense, and is goldclubbing a male customer or a female dancer?????

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Ok...we're getting off-topic...back onto topic with no flaming and we'll all be good. Otherwise the thread will be cleaned and locked. Okay?

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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    sorry.

    Go with your gut girl!!!!!
    Dump this customer!

  20. #20
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I used to have nightmares about men in general when I started dancing. I believe that some people are more intuitive than others and can pick up EASILY on the train of another person's thinking. On a less "metaphysical" level, a savvy person can pick up on someone's personality by watching body language, eye expressions, listening to choice of words, manner of speaking, mood shifts, etc.........
    The content of this thread upset me because some women in my family have been abused sexually or murdered. For someone to insinuate that a woman "asks" for stalking/ sexual abuse/violence because she's pretty and appealing IS WRONG.
    I remember in Maya Angelou's book about her childhood ("I know why the caged bird sings") she wrote that one of her mother's boyfriends raped her. Her uncles figured it out, killed the man, and dumped him in a vacant lot. Why did they do that? Because men who belong to a woman's social group suffer from a feeling of failure if the woman is harmed or killed.
    Not all men are abusers of women. The good ones know what an evil thing it is to hurt a woman that way.
    Last edited by madmaxine; 10-12-2004 at 04:29 PM.

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    Featured Member Muyaha's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I'm going with that your gut instinct is telling something isn't right and go with it. Like VG said start taking a different ways home. Be aware of your surroundings. Get pepper spray. If it comes down to it and if it's possible have someone that you trust male prefferably meet you at your house.

    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them.

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    Veteran Member goldclubbing's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    A last word about what has been miscontrued in my post...it was about cultivating regulars and how that differs from selling fantasy...and how at the end of the day a stripper is selling an intangible and must be careful and RESPONSIBLE for how they do it. 242 is seeing the results of cultivating a good paying steady customer who she admittedly does not really like and now is experiencing fear that he may want something more than the fantasy and hopefully he is not a psyco who wants to cause her harm for MISLEADING him. I'm hardly saying that all stippers do this VG but some do, however, I do know strippers and they know strippers as well, and have related to me how SOME of you behave.

    As far as my post being personal it wasn't meant to be. Its was about selling and the responsibilities of the salesperson to the customers not my personal experience...again I know that sadly the last place to look for friendship is in a strip club no matter what you girls say.

    And yes as I said in the beginning 242 listen to your gut $800 is good steady monthly money but not worth the risk of a psycho.

  23. #23
    Veteran Member goldclubbing's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    Emily--"puffing" is a sales term refering to giving the perception that something is being offered that isn't.

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    Veteran Member sandi_g's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    I had a nightmare about a customer last week. I can't really remember what it was about... I think he was just so ugly and weird looking that it popped up in my dream.... making it a nightmare.

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    Featured Member Muyaha's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Nightmares bout my Regular Customer

    LOL he was ugly and weird looking....LOL I think that's 75% of my customers.

    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them.

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