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Thread: Lap Dance Survey

  1. #1
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Lap Dance Survey

    For kicks, of course. I'll answer mine with the actual questions...

    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've given/gotten?
    My very first lapdance, back in NY, I tied the guy's show while bent over. He was shocked. He thanked me for an hour, and was an instant regular of mine.

    2) Most shocking dance? I did a 2 girl dance for a guy and the other girl (a former circus actress) set my bewbs on fire!

    3) Most frightening dance? A guy grabbed my wrist and tried to insert his finger in my pink bits. I crushed his WANG with the heel of my shoe and took the side of my tip box (those lil plastic cosmetics boxes Wal-Mart sells) to hi face. That bastid!

    4) Dance that has most angered you? A guy who bitched through the entire dance, about me not having sex with him during the dance, then tried to not tip me.

    5) Weirdest dance? I had a regular who wanted me to lay on the couch as he ran feathers over my body. Tipped real well too!

    6) Best tip you've gotten/given? a 5 Pound Note from the British Navy guys! That and i got a $50 once for an $8 dance. Whoa!

    7) motions/positions/actions you refuse to do? And why? I dont grind. I dont flash. No touchie the pink bits, pal, and no you cant go near my nips with your mouth. I wont kiss you on the lips. NY allwed straddling, FL doesnt, so I dont. I actually try to stick by local laws like mad, and club laws too.

    Is it ok (in you're own opinion of yourself) to break/bend rules during a dance?
    Number of times Rickrolled on stage: 6
    *******************************

    Marasmus ... "Ladies don't fart. They butt-laugh."
    Marasmus says, "Oh no, that wasn't gas, it was merely a rectal chuckle."

    Marek says, "A friend of mine got punched in the face by a dominatrix stripper about two weeks ago and I thought of you."

  2. #2
    Veteran Member pimpy718's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've given/gotten? Being a dominatrix.......I wasn't too good at acting when I first started dancing. He wanted me to slap him and kick him in the balls and every time I did, he'd go "HARDER!" I felt really awkward, but I look back now and I just thought it was funny 'cause he was an older married businessman who used to come to the club from out of town just so he could have a girl beat him up and tell him what a rotton piece of shit he was. Some ppl.........

    2) Most shocking dance? Customer was drunk out of his mind, bought two dances and then said hold on. He stood up and took his pants off in the lapdance room. I told him to stop, standing over there telling him I didn't want to dance for him anymore, he falls over with his pants down, boxers out, the bouncers threw him and his friends out and his friend only paid me for one dance!! Some places, you have to get your money first.

    3) Most frightening dance? I had a customer with really bad skin-real bad. He was West Indian, his English was terrible and he had white bumps covering one side of his face. When I danced for him, he tried to grab my hips and like push me back and fourth (I'm sure you guys know what I'm talking about) and though he spent like $100, he smelled funny and I couldn't really look at him 'cause he looked so scary, disgusting and he smelled like dog poo.

    4) Dance that has most angered you? This guy tried to argue with me about how much dances cost!! He paid me half of what he owed me, claiming the price he knows for lapdances. I put my heel on his junk and told him I would literally dislocate his prostate if he didn't give me at least 3/4 of it. He gave it to me but said he would NEVER dance with me again. Boo fuckin hoo, he was nasty to dance for anyway.

    5) Weirdest dance? Customer wanted me to spit in his mouth and said he'd pay me $80 for one song. (No kissing action, just open up wide like you're at the dentist and I'm going to hock a loogie in your mouth.) I spit in his mouth at the beginning of the dance, he came and it was over. Easiest $80 in my life.

    6) Best tip you've gotten/given? $100 bill on stage from this one guy each time I danced in front of him. The club I was working at you're on stage for like 30 min. so you only go up twice on a busy night but he was sitting in the corner by himself with a bottle of cristal, told me I should be a supermodel (yeah right! i'm a little big for that!) and gave me $100 the two times I was up. If I wasn't for him, I would have only made house that night so I was happy.

    7) motions/positions/actions you refuse to do? And why? No fingers, no blowjobs, no fucking, no kissing, no prostitution. Have nice, clean fun!! And why?? Because I'm not at a bunny ranch or hooking it on the corner and I don't plan to anytime soon, that's why.

    Is it ok (in you're own opinion of yourself) to break/bend rules during a dance? Technically, in lapdances guys are not supposed to touch your legs, butt, thys, boobs, whatever because in some states it's considered prostitution. It doesn't really bother me, I just don't like being multiply spanked or have my tits grabbed like it was the last melon at the grocery store. So yeah, sure why not?

  3. #3
    Featured Member noelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    1. Most amusing: There's a guy that comes into our club that is seriously a human version of Elmo. He buys a shitload of dances from all the girls and he'll actually dance himself too! He moves his arms around, giggles, makes weird squeaky noises, and pretends to lick you (but doesn't). I think he's a bit slow. Sometimes I feel bad taking his money.

    2. Most shocking: As a dancer I get propositioned a lot, but last week after a dance a guy said, totally matter-of-factly, "Veronica, I'd like to have sex with you. Is that at all possible?" I said "No, I'm a dancer." That was that, but it made me laugh how serious he was in asking. A true businessman.

    3. Most frightening: I did a dance for a guy who had a metal elbow and the whole time I'd been talking to him he complained about how much his metal elbow was hurting him. I was so afraid to bump into his elbow that it was a really shitty dance.

    4. Most angering: Ah, so many of them! One guy would NOT listen to me when I said he had to keep his hands OFF me and OFF himself (he kept trying to play with his weeiner through his pants, ew). He kept trying to negotiate so I'd let him touch me, but they're not MY rules, they're the clubs rules. On the third dance I noticed he had unzipped his pants! That was it, no more for him. Then he was a total hassle to collect money from. Usually if I can tell a guy will be trouble I collect with him up front.

    5. Weirdest dance: A customer with a heel fetish just wanted me to sit in front of him and poke him in the chest, face, and legs with my stilettos. It was fun!

    6. Best tip: Dances are $20 at my club, but a military guy who was leaving soon for Iraq tipped me an additional $20 for every dance I did for him. Did I mention I love military guys?

    7. Things I won't do: I don't usually put my face really close to the customers, because they'll often try to kiss me. Actually, I'll keep all body parts away from thir face if they seem to have a licking problem. I HATE when guys ask me to kiss them. In my opinion that is the grossest thing you can do with a complete stranger because it's very intimate.

    8. Breaking the rules: Honestly, I would not mind if a guy wanted to touch my legs during the dance, but at my club, if they see that they'll tell him hands off. I can't risk getting in trouble at this club because it's the cleanest one here and I love everyone I work with.

  4. #4
    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    Being a dj I can honestly only answer 1 question:
    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've gotten?When I was djing at this lil local titty bar I would get bored and take the wireless mic with me into the lapdance area. I had one dancer who would love to dance for me as I did my dj gig from the couch, until she farted and the mic picked it up......

  5. #5
    Senior Member The Original Babygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    lol noway lol stinky situation

  6. #6
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    I don't usually pay enough attention to remember. I mean, I pay 100% attention while I'm dancing, but then I move on and pay 100% attention to someone else.

    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've given/gotten?
    I dunno... seems like there've been a lot, but I don't remember...

    2) Most shocking dance?
    I once did a birthday dance where I lay upside down with my ass on the guys chest while another girl danced and dripped wax all over me. We ended the whole thing with her sticking the candle in my thong (she swears that from his angle it looked like she was fucking me with the candle) and telling him to make a wish. I was shocked at the last part!!

    3) Most frightening dance?
    A guy told me while I was sitting on his lap that he had been sent by the aliens to inform me that because of my superior ability to genetically mutate, I had been chosen to survive the end of the world. I looked down at him and I swear the skin on his face moved, like the guy in MIB II right before bugs started crawling out of him.

    4) Dance that has most angered you?
    Hmm... so many... but again, I don't pay that much attention. One guy was super drunk and was a perfect gentleman during the dance, and then as we were walking out of the dance area he was like, "Hey! You didn't suck my cock!?" Uhm, yeah...

    5) Weirdest dance?
    Ooh I get those all the time. Guys that want me to stand on their balls for the entire song, guys that want me to rip up money, I even had a guy once with a belly button fetish. He made my belly button talk and it turned him on.

    6) Best tip you've gotten/given?
    $600 for several hours in a hot tub with two other girls and a bunch of lawyers. I coordinated their experience, and gave the best back rubs, I guess, cause they didn't tip the other girls as much.

    7) motions/positions/actions you refuse to do? And why?
    I don't put my mouth on people and I don't let them put their mouth on me. There's no touching the kitty. Other than that I'm pretty open minded. Oh, no pedophile or violent fantasies either.

    Is it ok (in you're own opinion of yourself) to break/bend rules during a dance?
    Breaking a rule, not very often but I can't say I've never done it. Then, definitions of rules are sometimes open to interperetation. Breaking a law... not okay.



  7. #7
    Veteran Member OPEN's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    Mind if I post as a customer?
    (2)Well most shocking dance was prolly at De Ja vu in vegas I got a "bed dance" where I lie on bed and the girl closes the curtain to the individual rooms so she can climb on top of me full nude and rub her bod here there and everywhere,,,,
    (6) biggest tip given ,,, well I guess the laptop and 1K cash I gave out to my 2 favs was more of a christmas gifts, so prob around 6-800 tip on a night when I have plenty of time to spend with a fav. Actually I am always surprised by the response I get when I find a new cutie that I am attracted to so I have her dance for me till I leave and then tip a few hundred extra,,,,, They usually say something like " OMG are u sure"?

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    Quote Originally Posted by Blade
    Being a dj I can honestly only answer 1 question:
    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've gotten?When I was djing at this lil local titty bar I would get bored and take the wireless mic with me into the lapdance area. I had one dancer who would love to dance for me as I did my dj gig from the couch, until she farted and the mic picked it up......
    LOL

  9. #9
    God/dess Bunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've given/gotten? Being a dominatrix.......I wasn't too good at acting when I first started dancing. He wanted me to slap him and kick him in the balls and every time I did, he'd go "HARDER!" I felt really awkward, but I look back now and I just thought it was funny 'cause he was an older married businessman who used to come to the club from out of town just so he could have a girl beat him up and tell him what a rotton piece of shit he was. Some ppl.........
    I had a guy come up to me while I was sitting on a big speaker at a fetish party. He was a middle aged guy wearing nothing but a thong (He goes by "The Senator" and goes to a lot of night clubs, not sure about strip clubs) and he asked me to kick him in the balls and then laid down on the ground in front of the speaker. I was really tempted to do it becuase he had really nasty beer breath but I just wanted to be sure and asked him if he was serious and he goes "No, I was hoping you wouldn't really do it." Well why the hell did he ask, the idiot?



    5) Weirdest dance? Customer wanted me to spit in his mouth and said he'd pay me $80 for one song. (No kissing action, just open up wide like you're at the dentist and I'm going to hock a loogie in your mouth.) I spit in his mouth at the beginning of the dance, he came and it was over. Easiest $80 in my life.
    there was a guy in high school that asked me to spit in his mouth, begged me to do it! I swear I attract the weirdest people but I've never been paid for it so I really need to start dancing.

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    Most amusing dance I've gotten was just last night when I was with a group of guys and girls in VIP and the guy I'd been dancing for jumped up, dropped trou (though he left on his boxer briefs, thankfully), and started dancing for me. Two of his friends followed suit. They were very amusing.

    Funniest one I've given is probably when a group of guys asked me to wear a pair of (clean) tighty whities while dancing for their friend.

  11. #11
    Featured Member CrescentLuna's Avatar
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    Default Re: Lap Dance Survey

    1) Most amusing/laughable dance you've given/gotten?
    There was this one guy trying to talk dirty to me, and he said this, quote:
    "and he's so big, I mean so big.... it blocks out the sun!"
    me: "wow."
    him: "Yeah! And the stars too!"
    I don't know, I can't help but laugh about that, I'm imagining some bad sci-fi/porn about a doomsday penis that blocks out the sun and the land goes into nuclear winter and and and....

    Another was I was dancing for this girl, and her drunko guy buddy was paying for the dance and wanted to watch. Okee. Except he was doing a commentary, first over the phone to his friend "dude, Jen has the hottest girl on top of her! I'm totally serious, it's like the most sensual thing I've ever seen" and then just to us "Jen, lookit, her nipples are hard!" The girl and I kept laughing. Then the girl bought a lapdance for her bf, so it was all good.

    2) Most shocking dance?
    Don't really think I've had any of those, nothing outrageous.

    3) Most frightening dance? There was this guy that, while I was facing away but on his lap, arching my back, put his hand under my ribs and said "you know you can pull someone's ribs out if you hold your fingers like this and pull this way."

    4) Dance that has most angered you? I was facing away, straddling, with my hands on the floor and kind of shaking my butt at this guy, and he pulled my thong to one side and felt the pink bits. I was so angry. Another was this guy who had, I swear, a death-grip on my pubic bone, I had to wrench his hand away. Grr. And then the manager overturned the bouncer throwing him out. the fuck?

    5) Weirdest dance? Several of these. One guy took me in the champagne room and, after a bit of conversation, said how I looked like his dead wife and he started crying. One armpit licker. One guy who started trying to rock me to sleep, and then when I started to say "uhm, hon, I'm not going to fall asleep" he'd just say "shh, there there" and would pat my back and stuff.

    6) Best tip you've gotten/given? Was actually sleepy-time guy above, he gave me $20 for saying hi to him on the floor, then bought like 8 dances for $160 [which I'd see $80 of] then tipped me $240 during the dances.

    7) motions/positions/actions you refuse to do? And why?
    No "thong bits" anything covered by a thong is off-limits to touch, no matter local convention. No kissing. No pinching/oral contact with my nipples [it weirds me out and, honestly, I like having a little left to enjoy with my bf]. At this club I can't have my crotch at customer eye-level, apparently. *shrug* I'm really lousy at dirty-talk, plus I have a paranoia about law enforcement, so I don't volunteer it.

    Is it ok (in you're own opinion of yourself) to break/bend rules during a dance?
    No. It really isn't fair to other dancers. I didn't like that other dancers at my club were allowing customers to "brush or a little feel" with their breasts. A girl on the floor at my new club let a customer squeeze her boob to prove "not all implants are hard." Yeah, yeah, one-time thing, but I don't like coming off as "the prude stripper" because I don't bend rules.
    If the rules at your current club are too restrictive for you, find another club.
    "I still have my name
    I still have my face
    I have not run away from home
    Doesn't seem so long
    If I now embrace
    Every single thing I've never known"

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