Results 1 to 19 of 19

Thread: Question for the dancers....

  1. #1
    God/dess Mr Hyde's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Tampa
    Posts
    4,035
    Thanks
    278
    Thanked 586 Times in 346 Posts

    Default Question for the dancers....

    This seems to happen to me every time I go to a club....

    I'll be sitting there drinking my drink, checking out the scenery, maybe trying to see which girl I'd like to spend time/money with, when a girl that I have ZERO interest in sits in my lap/next to me and starts chatting me up.

    Now, I like when strippers make the extra effort in this regard. One of the more annoying things dancers do is the "walk up and say 'wanna dance?'" and that's it. But when a girl makes conversation, tries to entice me, shows some personality, etc, I'm definitely more likely to go for a girl that does that even if I wasn't initially into her...

    ...to a point. The girl still has to be attractive to me.

    But inevitably a girl who I really have no interest in will come sit on/by me, strike up a conversation...but never ask for a dance. They'll just sort of wait, even occasionally just sitting there saying nothing. I think they're sort of trying to get a LD by attrition...maybe if they hang around long enough, I'll buy.

    How can I politely get out of this situation without spending 30 buzzkill minutes waiting?

  2. #2
    Pamela
    Guest

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Kindly go to the bathroom. Finish the drink first, or have the bar hold it for you until you come back, then sit somep lace else. I know this may sound rude to a point, but i as well have seen dancers do this, and it does make for some customers not wanti to come back.

    Pamela

  3. #3
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jun 2003
    Posts
    358
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    I think that getting up and leaving the table with someone sitting there waiting for you may be a bit harsh. Perhaps these girls just don't know enough about the Biz yet to know that they are wasting not only your time, but theirs.
    Why don't you just kindly tell them, that allthough you appreciated them introducing themselves to you, you don't plan on getting any dances from them at the moment, and you're just wanting to look around the room and "window shop" right now, and their time would be better spent sitting on someone else's lap?
    This way, you have been honest, polite, and to the point. No one's feelings will be hurt.

  4. #4
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2004
    Location
    Boston MA
    Posts
    5,670
    Thanks
    35
    Thanked 144 Times in 74 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    "Thanks, but I'm waiting for X."

    This usually works fine, unless she's particularly obnoxious.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  5. #5
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2002
    Location
    On a sweet muddy river.
    Posts
    6,399
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 78 Times in 43 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Say, "Honey, I know your working and I don't want to waste your time, so I want you to know that I'm not going to buy a dance from you." If she's me, she'll thank you for letting her know, chat for a couple seconds just to pretend it's not all about the money, and move on.



  6. #6
    God/dess blondhottie's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2003
    Location
    St. Louis
    Posts
    4,575
    Thanks
    4,072
    Thanked 1,171 Times in 436 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    This is a tough situation. You may want to say to the dancer something like "I don't mean to be rude, but I just got here and I'd like to relax for a few minutes." Or you could say something like "I don't want to waste your time, but I'm not planning on getting any dances at the moment. I'd like to unwind for a bit first." I actually prefer when a guy says this. I can't stand it when a guy has no intention of buying dances and just tries to get as much free attention from the dancers as he possibly can.

    It is a tough call what to do when a girl that you have no interest in sits beside you and you want to get rid of her, but you don't want to hurt her feelings. If you say something along the lines of what I said above, most girls will get the hint and they shouldn't be offended.

  7. #7
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2003
    Location
    Home
    Posts
    13,598
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 28 Times in 23 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    OTOH, if the dancer is that thin-skinned that saying, "not interested" as she sits down that she'll unravel right there on the floor, then she's in the wrong business.

    I find it noble that you are so concerned with her "feelings", however, if you are not interested, you don't need the "right phrase". You just need to say a polite, "no, thanks...not right now."

  8. #8
    Senior Member bdoc's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    137
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    There is a club here in Shreveport that likes to double team a guy. First, the dancer will sit down and not more than a minute later the waitress comes over to ask you what drink you want to buy the lady. I've seen this happen way too many times for it to be coincidence.

  9. #9
    Veteran Member Lady's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    607
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    If I were you I would say "I appreciate you coming to keep me company, but I kind of have my eye on another girl right now.
    Just whatever you do, please dont tell the girl, "maybe later", because some of you mean to actually come back later, and for others, it is there way of saying they are not interested. So if you tell her later, she may actually come back later!
    Last edited by Lady; 11-15-2004 at 02:19 AM. Reason: fix typing errors

  10. #10
    God/dess RedZ28's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    2,519
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    If you might be interested, tell her you just got here and still browsing the menu lol. If she isn't exactly your cup of tea, tell her she's beautiful, but you have someone else in mind and politely say no thank you.

  11. #11
    Featured Member CrescentLuna's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Upstate NY
    Posts
    1,146
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    I think if you know you aren't going to be getting a dance from her, don't use any "I'm just looking right now" or "maybe later" type of responses - say plain and simply "I'm not going to be buying any dances, and I don't want to waste your time." I've known a lot of girls who do this, and I've done it to some extent, waited too long to ask that is, though usually I say something first like "would you mind if I joined you?" or "are you waiting for anyone?"

    Bit me in the ass the other night, there's this one guy at the club, comes in fairly regularly, buys dances from a couple of girls, tips me on stage every so often. However, none of the usual girls he buys dances from were in that night. So I come up "hey, how you doing this evening? haven't seen you for awhile" blah blah blah. So after maybe half an hour [in my defense, it was dead] I say "so, would you like to go for a dance?"
    "Uh . . . no, thank you, but I generally only get dances from the lighter girls. Sorry to waste your time." [and yeah, lighter as in weight, not skin tone] Grrg. He did actually end up getting a dance from me, out of pity.
    "I still have my name
    I still have my face
    I have not run away from home
    Doesn't seem so long
    If I now embrace
    Every single thing I've never known"

  12. #12
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    92
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Hyde
    This seems to happen to me every time I go to a club....

    I'll be sitting there drinking my drink, checking out the scenery, maybe trying to see which girl I'd like to spend time/money with, when a girl that I have ZERO interest in sits in my lap/next to me and starts chatting me up.

    Now, I like when strippers make the extra effort in this regard. One of the more annoying things dancers do is the "walk up and say 'wanna dance?'" and that's it. But when a girl makes conversation, tries to entice me, shows some personality, etc, I'm definitely more likely to go for a girl that does that even if I wasn't initially into her...

    ...to a point. The girl still has to be attractive to me.

    But inevitably a girl who I really have no interest in will come sit on/by me, strike up a conversation...but never ask for a dance. They'll just sort of wait, even occasionally just sitting there saying nothing. I think they're sort of trying to get a LD by attrition...maybe if they hang around long enough, I'll buy.

    How can I politely get out of this situation without spending 30 buzzkill minutes waiting?
    LOL I know what you mean, fortunately though I haven't had the problem in awhile... I try not to make eye contact or tip them on stage if I am not attracted to them. Maybe it depends more on the club... another club I go to a majority of the girls just say "want a dance?" and thats it. But at my favorite club they will sit down and talk before asking.

    I am still trying to shake one annoying dancer who will continue to keep asking for dances the whole night even after getting one. I wish I knew her schedule so I would know when not to go.

  13. #13
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Here and there
    Posts
    394
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    i try to avoid this by first ASKING if they mind if i sit down next to them. if they don't want my company/find me attractive then they'll usually say "i'm fine thank you" or "i'm waiting for someone." but if a girl just plops right down just say "thanks but i'm not buying any dances and i don't wanna waste your time."

  14. #14
    Veteran Member Lady's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    607
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Wow. I really would just say, umm im actually interested in someone else. If you tell the girl you arent going to be buying anything, she is going to tell all the other girls and even if you invite one over, unless you start spending and quick she isnt going to stay long because she heard that you arent going to be buying and therefor assumes you are broke. I would tell her you are interested in someone else.

  15. #15
    Senior Member
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    92
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    LOL it's hard to say your not buying dances because what happens when a girl you like asks and you get a dance?

  16. #16
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Apr 2004
    Location
    Here and there
    Posts
    394
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 5 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Quote Originally Posted by cosis
    LOL it's hard to say your not buying dances because what happens when a girl you like asks and you get a dance?
    sorry, i should have been more specific. only say that if you're really NOT buying ANY dances that night. if you simply don't want one from her say something like "thanks, but i'm still checking everything out" or "thanks but i have my eye on someone" which opens it up so you can still get a dance from some other girl.

  17. #17
    Member otheia's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    texas
    Posts
    52
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    tell her nicely, most girls dont want to waste their time so if you just be honest in a nice fashion it will usually work, Ive also seen guys get up to go to the bathroom leave the girl there and move to a different table i guess it works just not so nice lol.
    Last edited by otheia; 11-17-2004 at 10:58 PM. Reason: grammer

  18. #18
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    "I don't want to waste your time so why don't you go work the room. I'm looking for someone else."

    I think that says it all. If she hangs around after that she's a moron and then it's ok for you to employ the bathroom tactic. Hell I might even skip the bathroom altogether and just move to another table or to the bar for a few.

    You don't need to be overly concerned about hurting a girl's feelings, most of us have heard the word "no" quite a few times and have figured out that it isn't lethal.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  19. #19
    Member tigergirl's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Houston
    Posts
    28
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Question for the dancers....

    Quote Originally Posted by Lena
    Say, "Honey, I know your working and I don't want to waste your time, so I want you to know that I'm not going to buy a dance from you." If she's me, she'll thank you for letting her know, chat for a couple seconds just to pretend it's not all about the money, and move on.
    What Lena said is simple and clean - it would not have bothered me when I was dancing. Sometimes now as a waitress, I will get asked by a customer (usually a regular) to intervene. He might get up to go to the bathroom and ask me to help "shoo" a girl away. I usually say he is a regular who is looking for one of his regular girls to spend time with. It rarely causes any trouble, but can hurt the feelings of a brand new girl.
    Tigergirl

Similar Threads

  1. question for dancers
    By victor2 in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 08-10-2009, 01:33 AM
  2. Question for LA, CA dancers?
    By Korina in forum Club Chat
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 07-22-2006, 05:47 AM
  3. Question for LA, CA dancers?
    By Korina in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 07-20-2006, 02:11 AM
  4. Question for dancers in NC
    By MysteriousDestiny in forum Club Chat
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-14-2005, 05:33 PM
  5. A question for the Dancers...
    By Madcap in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 31
    Last Post: 02-25-2004, 09:46 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •