View Poll Results: How many (unknown) phone numbers of the opposite sex does your mate have?

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Thread: Little black book?

  1. #1
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    Default Little black book?

    I am having major jelousy issues.

    My man has about 10 girls numbers in his phone that I have never met (nor do I think I ever will). I think this is rediculous, he thinks I'm overreacting. What do you think?

  2. #2
    God/dess RoseDelight's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    I think you're over-reacting a smidge. You have to get over this 'jealousy' thing. It's going to ruin your relationship in the future. IS he calling these girls, dating them, macking on them? If not, I don't see anything wrong with it. You can't expect him to completely remove all of these people out of his life just because he's dating you.

    All of my friends are male, and my boyfriend is very comfortable with that. The truth is there, so we keep it together.

    Why are you looking at the numbers in his phone anyways?


    --Georg Christoph Litchenberg



  3. #3
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    well, who are the girls?

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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Girls he meets at partys while I'm at work. I'm trying hard not to overreact, but he once came home from a party like this



    With handprints and scratches on him too. Plus he goes outside to take the calls.

    We've been married two years.

  5. #5
    God/dess RoseDelight's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Ah, That gives us a little more information.

    He comes home with scratches, and goes outside to take phone calls? Yeah, I'd cut him.

    Have you asked him what's going on? If so, I am sure he says "Nothing". Hmmmm. I don't see why a married man would get numbers from girls at parties. Maybe sit down with him, and talk to him. I'd find out who all these girls are that are calling him. I really don't see there being a reason for him to go outside to accept a call unless he's hiding something from you.


    --Georg Christoph Litchenberg



  6. #6
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    This sounds like a great episode of Cheaters in the making!
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  7. #7
    God/dess MrChristopher's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    i talk outside on the phone all the time, just to be away from the noise of 4 kids, and so i can have a smoke. but this sounds like a whole different animal. something is rotten in denmark, for sure. find out what's up asap.
    waffles are just pancakes with little squares on them.

  8. #8
    Veteran Member DeepGreen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Other than practical reasons for talking outside (noise from kids ^), the fact that he keeps these phone calls secret is a major red flag. The wife and I have lots of friends of the opposite sex--we hang out with them freely either as a couple or alone--but we have no secrets. Anything I have to say to a female friend, my wife is more than welcome to hear, and vice versa. It may (hopefully) be nothing--but I would tell him that you feel uncomfortable with these types of things. If he gets upset/defensive, well then that tells you something about him...
    There's only us. There's only this. Forget regret, or life is yours to miss... --RENT

    Do not taunt happy fun ball.

  9. #9
    God/dess AinNY's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Quote Originally Posted by RoseDelight
    Ah, That gives us a little more information.

    He comes home with scratches, and goes outside to take phone calls? Yeah, I'd cut him.

    Have you asked him what's going on? If so, I am sure he says "Nothing". Hmmmm. I don't see why a married man would get numbers from girls at parties. Maybe sit down with him, and talk to him. I'd find out who all these girls are that are calling him. I really don't see there being a reason for him to go outside to accept a call unless he's hiding something from you.
    WHAT SHE SAID

    Doesnt sound good

  10. #10
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    If he is cheating he is not too smart is he? First females call when you are around. second he keeps the numbers? Hmm, cheating men never are smart, actually if anyone is going to cheat they are very stupid.

    Read this. He is you're HUSBAND. You demand to know what the hell is going on. Also call one of these females up...YEP as his wife you have that right. Hell call all of them. Ask them questions, tell them you are married to this man.

    Remember, these women may not know he is married either...Just find out if he is cheating. Have kids? I hope not, really. If you do, take him for every fuckin penny, and do it again and again.

    I really can't stand people who cheat. I was accused of cheating, biggest mistake a man can make with me, because then our relationship is over, i walk. That's bs.

    Get the facts first. Don't just accuse however. That hurts if you could be wrong. But you're red flag is up, and listen to it.

    Good luck,

    Pamela

  11. #11
    Veteran Member bigteninch's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    all sounds pretty tame till you get to the part about scratches. I use my cell everywhere, including outside - whatever- and it has yet to bite or scratch me.
    I think you should have a talk with him, cut him, and tell him it looks like he is on the wrong team...

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    Default Re: Little black book?

    O.K. now here's the really big catch, after that night with the marker on his ass, I of course left him. We were seperated for five months. I refused to talk to him from July to early September during which I had a one night stand that that I told him about as soon as we resumed talking. After he found out he started being really nice and sweet to me, it was just like after we got married. So we started going out and staying over alot, this lasted for about two months. We got serious again last month and he asked me to come home and I agreed.

    Low and behold while I was driving down with my car full of boxes, and one of my friends (also the drummer in his band) called me and told me that my man was making out with some girl at the bar (considentally the same place we got married) and at the apartment afterwards the day before he asked me to come home. He doesnt deny it either, he was very open about it and he's never really lied to me ever.

    I'm not sure how to take all of this. I dont know if that was a well you did it so I'm having my last hoorah type thing or if he's just going to be shitty to me if I come home. So in the mean time everything I own has been in my car for the last week while I try to figure it out.

    Help!

  13. #13
    God/dess AinNY's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Im really confused as to whats going on....maybe im just retarded...but im not following the situation to well.

    What I take from it....
    1- He's a "player" type....its just who he is....im not saying its impossible for that type to change....but that shouldve happened when you were married.
    2- It seems that he doesnt have to change, b/c he can sort of get away with things with you.
    3- If you really have to question this stuff in a "marraige" is it really right?
    4- Its all up to you....we cant tell you for sure....you are the only one who can tell if it "feels right" in your heart.
    5- I'd say walk away now, b/c you dont trust him and I doubt you ever will b/c im sure he will still keep giving you reasons not to.

    Good luck...wish you the best

  14. #14
    Pamela
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Hun you know it's going on, he does not deny it you say. What are you doing with him? I hate to sound harsh, but really are you waiting for, a disease? He seems to have learned this behaviour is fine with you. Let him know he has git to stop. Period. Or he's out. He's a cheater Cut the tie. Better sooner than later.

    Pamela

  15. #15
    God/dess RoseDelight's Avatar
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    Default Re: Little black book?

    Aren't you getting tired of worrying about him? Wondering what he is doing? If he's cheating, if he's not? I made it a strict rule for myself if I ever have to have a 'sleepless night' worrying about that type of shit. It's time for me to leave.


    --Georg Christoph Litchenberg



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