i wrote this whole thread out before and i had a computer problem and it was deleted so ill try to summarize.
im a 21 year old dancer, ive been dancing for 2 1/2 years in 4 states.
im not new but there is a lot of stuff i need to relearn about the business because ive hit a rough spot and feel like im burning out.
but i cant quit because i need a job, this is the only club for 100 miles and i have no car, and the town i live in now is so small there arent any other businesses hiring.
i know im depressed.
i need therapy and medication.
but i have no insurance and cant afford to pay out of pocket so its going to have to wait until after christmas.
the club i work at is the worst in my career so far.
everything about it is awful.
but i need the money and im moving in 6 months so i think i can handle it. it would mean so much for me to overcome this and not quit. plus, i can quit as soon as i have enough money saved to pay my very very low cost of living for that six months, plus save a little something to live on while i settle into stripping in a better location. i could in theory do that in one month - IF i could just get my mental state under control enough to be productive in business.
the truth is ive really started hating people and socializing and i cant even fake it anymore. 95% of the customers where i work are bitter, mean, drunks twice my age who disrespect me and complain that i wont kiss their ass and let them feel up on me while im sitting at the bar or do dirty (and ILLEGAL) things on the tip rack for their measly $1.
so im finding it hard to just be NICE.
its seems like something that any normal person should be able to do!
it shouldnt be so hard to just be nice and decent to people EVEN IF THEY DONT DESERVE IT.
how do you do that though?


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