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Thread: For those of you who "used" to dance

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    Featured Member krys's Avatar
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    Default For those of you who "used" to dance

    I know I don't want to be dancing forever... I have things I am aiming for and I like dancing becuase it gives me the time and money to work towards those things. However sometimes I feel its all counter productive. I will work hard save money but after a stretch I will need to take time off due to stress and end up spending what I saved! The hours leave me tired and sometimes I don't have the energy to do what I want....... Sometimes I don't feel good about the job which in turn can affect how I feel about myself and that affects alot of things in reality (life away from the club.)

    I do want to stop and get a "real" job but honestly I think I am scared,
    - scared I won't be able to manage financially
    - scared of being tied into a job and working for someone else
    - scared of how I will be able to fit in all the things I want to do working on a set schedule
    - scared I want be good at anything else (I know this last one is bollocks though...)

    How did you ladies who "used" to dance deal with it and why did you decide to stop?

    k xo

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    Veteran Member nychaos99's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    Well, way back when, I decided to stop to 'grow up'. I guess the time was right- also I had a boyfriend and (not that there's anything wrong with it) I didn't want to be a stripper girlfriend. Plus, I didn't want to make a career out of it, AND I moved states.

    So, all in all, the timing was right for me.

    Financially it sucked big time- but I had to quit dancing. I had graduated college and went on to work as a professional makeup artist. Then, about a year and a half ago, I fell into this job now, at PEC in New York. I came in to apply as a makeup artist, fell in love with the place, and now I'm kinda sorta like a Manager. Pretty cool. It's totally fun and exciting, and what's better, is that all those years of dancing has overly prepared me for my job now!

    I always thought I'd have to hide my dancing, but it turns out that I can thank my old club for my life now--- I am very lucky to have this job and it's something I'm really good at.

    Plus, I don't miss dancing, now that I'm around it all the time!
    Esquire Club New York
    West Side
    New York, NY

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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    I planned ahead( pretty much from the first few weeks) when to quit at a certian time and with a certian money goal. I met my goal early so I went ahead and left the business.
    I think planning ahead is the key-- when you have a game plan it's alot less scary. I wanted to have and raise a child full time so that's what my planned for but other women I know who have left and done well did so after they got that degree or had the down payment for a business etc.

    Plan ahead so when the time comes you don't feel overwhelmed with the "what if's or now what's "

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    Banned Melonie's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    While I was dancing full time, I did everything that I could to increase my income potential (i.e. the huge boobs), and I worked my ass off travelling from city to city to follow the 'big money'. I then banked the vast majority of that money and managed my investments smartly. As a result when I finally decided to 'quit' dancing live I was already in a position of not needing any additional income beyond that which my investments were already providing.

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    Member brandy76's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    I started dancing when I just got out of college (didn't finish) & had huge credit card bill approx $10,000 so I decided to dance & pay them off. I danced for a year & felt so relieved to pay that off in no time. However the dancing took its toll on me, I would literally dread going to work to ask guys for dances, it effected my personality, I became miserable to be around when I wasn't at work. Being on the opposite schedule than my boyfriend was also difficult.

    The scary part was seeing dancers who were there for so long, yet still complaining about not having enough money to quit & I didn't want to get caught in that trap. From an outsiders view people think dancers are living like high society, but for some reason it doesn't work like that.

    After the year I decided to quit (boyfriend was happy) and I found a job in NYC working as an administrative asst. for a fortune 500 company. The pay is great for someone like me who doesn't have a bachelors (I have an associates) and my job pays 100% to go back to school, great benefits and job security. Sometimes when i got to a strip club with my bf, I get nostalgic & think about going back part time, but then I remember the hideous aspects of it, like getting the men to spend money on you & putting up with all their comment s- then I snap back to reality & think maybe I couldn't do this again.

    Granted I work more to make about the same I did dancing, but it's steady money & automatically a percentage of my pay goes into a 401K where as when I danced I would always say i'm going to put the money away, but when you always deal with cash it's hard to do that.

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    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    An interesting question would be how many dancers have tried their hand at network marketing and/or MLM type of businesses to "try" and get out or suppliment their income (so they can reduce how much they have to work)? I'm doing that right now as a way to suppliment and then hopefully eventually replace my income. On top of that I have another business I want to have enough money to run for the first four months .... two businesses in total. I would prefer to be able to "do" these businesses full time and dancing on a casual/part time basis... and eventually give up.

    I want out. I'm working on it.


    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    Featured Member susan's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    Quote Originally Posted by krys
    I know I don't want to be dancing forever...
    Well, you WON'T dance forever! Admittedly, there are a lot if girls who dance w-a-a-a-y past 30 and sometimes even past 40, but the overwhelming majority of dancers are somewhere between the ages of 18 and..... oh hell, prolly 24-ish.

    Personally, my story is w-a-a-a-y simple. I NEVER viewed dancing as something I was going to do for more than a year or two. I was in school at ASU. I only spent a year there, although I had PLANNED to stay longer. I transferred there as a sophomore, and had danced a couple of private parties before then but never in a club. Met a guy who was taking a year off between college and law school to be a bouncer in a club. I found out what he did and got overwhelmingly curious about the club. Next thing you know, it's an amateur night, and I'm on stage, and suddenly I'm "sorority girl gone bad" three nights a week!

    He got admitted to U.W. law school, and I moved here with him. The club scene in Seattle sucks BIG TIME, so I don't dance anymore. There ya have it.

    Do I miss dancing? Oh hell yeah. If we were back in Phoenix or some other city where the clubs are great, I'd be back dancing at least one night a week in no time.

    Did I adjust to the money? Sure... I saved a few bucks while I was dancing, and it allowed me to finish college without having to w--k much. Now, as far as my friends know, I'm Suzy Home-maker, planning to be Suzy Mom one day soon.

    Good luck! There's plenty of "life after dancing"

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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    I quit dancing because I got tired of hearing the bullshit stories from the men, their conversation. I didnt want to talk to them, it might sound harsh, but I didnt give a shit what they had to say, I only wanted their money. I got tired of going up on stage and not making as much as the next person. I got tired of the smoke, of the drive, of having to wash my work clothes every damn day I worked, ect ect. Usually when I quit I want to go back, but I cant imagine going back at all. I want to go to school, but unfortunately for me, I didnt save any $ at all. So I am going to get a job at a veterinary hospital and pay my way through school with that. Sure, I might go back one day for like a month to see how much cash I can make, but nah, Ill never go back again!

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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    This is a tough question. I danced on and off for ten years, tried to quit a few times, but couldn't because: 1) financial dependence and 2) I still had a "dance" left in me. Number 2 is still difficult. I enjoyed the creative side of this job so much. I really loved the self-expression. The first problem resolved itself with time and my husband is a professional (NOT why I married him--it's just a bonus). The second? I bought a stripper pole for my house!

    I can only speak for myself, but I am not a "practical" person. I've always been a little air headed when it comes to the practical things in life. I never saved money, I spent it as fast as I earned it. I spent quite a bit of it on rare books (which I collect) and traveling. At the end of my career, I was writing all the time, consumed with writing, so I worked only weekends to pay my bills and that afforded me the time I needed to write. People have put me down for it, but honestly, I never gave a shit about the money. I cared more about having my freedom, my time, so I could do what I really enjoyed. I now have a wonderful library. I don't reccomend this route for everyone, but I'm pleased with the results. My fiance (husband now) was a defense attorney, but he hated litigating for money glutton coorporations, he's always been on the side of the working man and his job was destroying him emotionally. He decided to switch to a plaintiffs firm in another state and I retired for good. As far as negative experiences triggering my retirement, well, let's just say I don't think I could go back now. I feel like I'm healing in a lot of ways, I also feel like the job rescued my soul in a lot of ways. I was bitter after I retired for awhile--but I came to terms with that bitterness and realized that this job gave me a gift, it "stripped" me of those social conventions that oppress human sexuality and the body. It forced me to unlearn the shame that I was taught about my body from an early age. I am so happy I'm not like some of these blathering idiots on this board and everywhere I seem to go who can't get a grip on their own bodies, or the bodies of others--I am speaking of what the forum refers to as "trolls." My statement to them is, if you got hang-ups, that's your problem. I don't. I'm comfortable with who I am-- naked or clothed and one day buried in the ground.

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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    Quote Originally Posted by GoldCoastGirl
    An interesting question would be how many dancers have tried their hand at network marketing and/or MLM type of businesses to "try" and get out or suppliment their income (so they can reduce how much they have to work)? I'm doing that right now as a way to suppliment and then hopefully eventually replace my income. On top of that I have another business I want to have enough money to run for the first four months .... two businesses in total. I would prefer to be able to "do" these businesses full time and dancing on a casual/part time basis... and eventually give up.

    I want out. I'm working on it.
    You and me both. I am completely burned out from dancing. I'm tired of the atmosphere I have been dancing for almost 4 years and my time is up. In fairness I have always danced on and off. I'll work for like two weeks straight non stop then I'll take the next two weeks (sometimes month) off. I have such low tolerance for the men at work. My attitude has completely changed over the last year or so. I am at the point where I feel like spitting in someone's face at work .

    I just recently looked into a network marketing program (Liberty League International) but I'm a little skeptical. After extensive research at this point I feel there are smarter ways to invest my money. The start up costs of getting involved can be a little steep. I'm down to dancing 3 days a week, running my real estate business, and in the process of developing another business which I'm very excited about. It's very hard work but I know it will be worth it in the end. I have a plan now all I need is to remain focused.

    I have a bachelors degree in paralegal studies which I use occasionally taking temp jobs, but I know it's not the career for me. For those of you going to school or going back to school. CHOOSE YOUR MAJOR WISELY! Or else it's a complete waste of your time and money. I will be making more money with my real estate license which took 6 weeks and a total of $700 than I have with a 4 year degree that has costs me close to $70,000 (scholarships and financial aid included) of which I have $30,000 in student loan to pay off.

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    I quit dancing because of that cheetahs fiasco. The owner of the club I worked at took them all on and all of a sudden, there were too many dancers, too much competition, too much dirty stuff going on, and not enough money for everyone to share fairly. I bowed out. The hardest part was learning how to re-budget my income and expenditures! I have a job in retail now and I go to school... but i still supplement it with adult-type stuff and and I'm open to going back if an opportunity ever arises. It's good to get other jobs everyonce in awhile. Even if you do them while you dance once a week (for those breaks you need). It helps when you need to fill in the blanks for past employment down the road :/.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    God/dess kryssy's Avatar
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    Default Re: For those of you who "used" to dance

    I personally feel that you "just know" when to stop. For me personally I had my 3rd child and just burnt out from dancing. My marriage was suffering due to me not being happy.

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